Fighting Perfection (The Perfection Series Book 2) (34 page)

     He pulled me back into his arms and kissed me again whispering words of love and a bright future together.  Then he proceeded to make love to me slowly right there on the sofa.

     I managed to keep myself busy during the weeks leading up to Delia’s new hearing date.  I tried many recipes I looked up online, tried to teach myself how to knit (a real disaster), and read book after book.  I made a few friends of the other pilots’ wives, and we got together for lunch every now and then.  I felt a little out of my depth as they had very different lives than mine.  Two of them had small children which I couldn’t relate to even a little bit.  The third was trying to conceive.  I imagined if I’d still been married to Vance, I’d have a lot more in common with them considering we’d have been married five years and probably have a small family of our own.  Such thoughts were pointless so I didn’t dwell on them.  At any rate, they were all nice ladies and they kept any need for social interaction satisfied.

     One night about a week before I was scheduled to return to Los Angeles, James came home looking grim-faced.  I was immediately on alert as I had been conditioned years ago that such a countenance forebode something very bad for me. 

     “What’s wrong?  What’s happened?” I immediately asked from my place at the stove.  I had been in the middle of preparing a beef stew which I planned to serve over rice.  Everything was boiling, but I turned down the flames and went straight to James.

     He took my hand and led me to the sofa.  Sitting me down, he said, “I have some news, and I’m not sure how you’re going to take it.  I’m being deployed next month.”

    My eyes rounded in fear.  “Syria?” I asked with my heart in my mouth.

    He smiled softly and said, “No.  I’ll be in Israel, fortunately.  I’ll be gone at least six months, however.”

     My relief at him not going into a war zone buffered the news that we’d be apart for an extended period of time.  When it finally hit me, I felt my heart sink. 

     “What does this mean for us?” I asked nervously.

     “I don’t know about you, but nothing has changed as far as I’m concerned.  I still want us to be in a committed relationship.  I know it will be hard being apart this first time, but you have to realize this is part of being involved with someone in the military.  We’ll have periods of time where we are separated.  Tell me now if you don’t think you can handle it.”

     “It’s going to be lonely as hell without you within driving distance.  However, I’m not giving up on what we have.”

     “Are you positive?  This life can be hard on even the most faithful of people.”

     “If you’re worried I’m going to go out and cheat on you, you don’t know me as well as I thought you did.”

     “Even with Justin?” he asked bitterly.

     “Now, wait a minute.  If I wanted to be with Justin, I would be.  I picked you.  It’s not going to be a situation of ‘out of sight, out of mind’,” I said feeling offended.  “Just because we’ll be separated does not mean I’ll be unable to control myself and jump on the most willing target.”

     “I’m sorry.  You’re right.  This is just a touchy subject for me considering my past with my              ex-wife.”

     “Oh, wow.  I’d nearly forgotten about that since you never mention her.”

     “I figure I’m mostly immune to thoughts of that time now so no point in talking about it.  I guess I never totally got over the betrayal though,” he admitted.

     It dawned on me suddenly that he must have loved her very much.  “You were so matter of fact about it when you told me, I developed the opinion that she hadn’t meant very much to you.  That’s not true at all, is it?”

     “God, no.  Like I told you, she was a S.N.A.G., but I didn’t know it at the time.  I was head over heels for the girl.  Our relationship, at least how it began, was not so different from what you described feeling for Vance.  I threw myself off that proverbial cliff into her waiting clutches.  I thought she’d felt the same.  I didn’t realize until well after things were done and she’d moved in with that other pilot that she was just a status-seeking slut.”

     I took his hand and looked him in the eye.  “You don’t have to worry about that with me.  Like you told me when I first met you, being a pilot is what you do, not who you are, and it’s who you are that I love.”

     He was quiet for a few moments, then said, “You know, that’s the first time you’ve said that to me.  You’ve acted like you love me so I never let it bother me, but until just now, I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear you say that out loud.”

     “I didn’t know until just now how much I do.” I said, smiling softly at him.

     He pulled me closer and we laid back on the sofa, snuggling close.  “We’ll make it through this.  My one concern is not being here while you have to go through the Delia thing.  Who knows when her trial will be set?  With her out on bail, you’re in constant danger when you’re down there.”

     I hadn’t had time to consider all the things his deployment meant for me.  Aside from missing him and the strain it could put on our relationship, I’d be losing my safe haven.  “Maybe I should sell my house and move out of Los Angeles,” I wondered out loud.

     “I wish I could say you didn’t need to go to such extremes, but that woman is a menace.  Perhaps you could rent an apartment until she goes to trial?”

     “That’s probably the best solution.  Oh God, James, what if she’s not convicted?” I moaned.

     “That’s not going to happen.  If she’s smart, she’ll strike a deal.”

     “The evidence is hardly irrefutable.  It’s not like there’s DNA evidence against her.”

     James’ face fell into a troubled frown.  “Let’s take it one step at a time.  I’ll make sure to have another conversation with Justin before I go.  One where he is left with no doubt about where you and I stand and what I’ll do to him if he tries to fuck it up.  I hate to say it, but he’s our best option for your protection at this point.”

     “I could get a Rottweiler,” I said thoughtfully.

     “Having a dog around is not a bad idea.  Tomorrow let’s go check out some pet rescue places and find you a good watchdog.”

     I agreed, and we settled down to eat dinner.  I didn’t pay much attention to how the meal tasted, and I doubt he did either, our minds swirling with thoughts of him being a world away and of Delia’s madness overshadowing my life.

     By the time I woke the next day, James had been up researching animal rescues and making phone calls.  He had a list of places to visit already and was eager to get started.  I had a quick breakfast of cereal and coffee and hurried through my shower.  James was in that much of a hurry.  I didn’t think the world would come to an end if we didn’t find a dog before noon, but he seemed to think it would so I just went along with his incessant urging.

     We were out on the road by nine a.m.  I realized that most of these places were at least an hour away which may have accounted for some of his impatience.  He was bound and determined we’d have a dog today.

      The first place we stopped only had a few dogs on site.  There was a Golden Retriever that was absolutely sweet and lovable.  I felt a connection to it, but James insisted we needed a dog that was just as menacing as it was fierce.  He reminded me that this was not the average pet to be pampered and have fun with.  He told me to consider it a work dog more than a pet.  I had too much of a fondness for animals to ever consider viewing one that way.

     “If you think I’m going to get a dog and think of it only in terms of its use to me, you’re sorely mistaken.  This is going to be a new member of my family.  We have to bond.  There has to be love there.”

     “Of course there does,” he said.  “I’m not an asshole, Mimi.  I like animals, too.  You just have to understand this one serves a double purpose.  No offense to the retriever, but she looks like she’d invite people in.  I think she’s too friendly.”

     “As long as she’s loyal, that’s what matters.  To be honest, I really only need one that barks.  One that will give me a head’s up that something is wrong.”

     “Kitten, if we had the time, I’d make sure you had the biggest and baddest attack dog we could find.  I want one that will not just alert you, but protect you.”

     “Fine.  We’ll just have to find a hardy breed and hope I bond with one.”

      With one last pat to the retriever’s head and a long, regretful look, we took off for the next sanctuary.  This one was a pit bull rescue, and James had high hopes.

     I was amazed at the rows of kennels.  There had to be upwards of fifty dogs at this particular rescue.  There were volunteers everywhere cleaning cages and caring for the animals.  There was a large fenced-in grassy play area where several of the dogs were playing with toys and other potential adoptive families.  The dogs looked happy and well cared for. 

     As we walked along a particular row of kennels, a snow-white dog caught my eye.  I walked closer to her cage and took a better look.  She looked almost albino so pure was the white of her coat.  After checking the information sheet attached to the door of her kennel, I knelt down and pressed the back of my hand to the chain link that held her back.

     She sniffed at me for a moment before looking at me with these deep, sad eyes.  Then, her soft pink tongue came out and she licked the back of my hand.  That’s all it took.  I was in love, and that dog was mine.

     James came over and read her information sheet.  “It says here she was rescued a year ago from an animal hoarder and suffering from severe neglect when she came in.  Her name is Snowflake.”

     “Yes, I saw that.  I can see in her eyes that she’s been through a lot.  Look how sad they seem.”  I looked up at him from my crouch where Snowflake was now licking my fingertips that I had curled through the links in the fence.  “This is the one I’m taking home with me.”

     “Let’s see if we can get them to let her out to play with us so we can observe how she interacts with us.  It’s hard to get a sense of a dog’s true temperament from inside the cage.”

     “She’s going to be perfect.  I already know it,” I stated firmly.

     We approached one of the volunteers who was all too glad to let us play with Snowflake.  The dog stayed by my side, seeming only mildly interested in the other dogs and the toys.  I picked up a toy made out of thick, braided rope and tried to engage her in some play.  She immediately responded by biting at its end and trying to tug it out of my hands.  The dog was strong.  She nearly pulled me off my feet a couple times.  She also refused to let go, shaking her head wildly as she tried to tear the toy from my grip. 

     I let her have the rope and sat down to pet her.  She immediately nosed the toy back towards me wanting to play some more.  I put the toy aside and put my arms around her.  She nuzzled my cheek, then licked it.  The deal was sealed.  I was going to have this dog no matter what.

     James sat next to me and began to stroke her flank.  She turned her head toward him so I let go.  She moved next to him and sat down in front of him, her tongue lolling out of her panting mouth looking at him expectantly.

     “What do you want, girl?” he asked as he pet her head.

      I laughed.  “I think she wants you to hug her, too.”

     He laughed along with me, then tugged on her collar.  She stood and rested her chin on his shoulder so he gave her a big squeeze.  When he let go, she licked his face and then sat between us.  You could see she was on alert, the way she watched the other animals and people milling about.  It was clear she had adopted us first.

     We led her back toward the kennels where we found another volunteer and let him know that we wanted to take Snowflake home with us.  He knelt down and ruffled her coat.  “She’s a good dog,” he said.  “Do you have kids?” he asked us. 

     We smiled and shook our heads.  “The reason I ask is she’s very good with children.  I’ve watched her herd them together out in the play yard and try to keep the other dogs away from them.”

     “Maybe someday,” James said to my astonishment.

     “Well, she’s the perfect babysitter if you do,” the volunteer joked.  “Let’s go fill out some paperwork and arrange for your home visit.”

     “We can’t take her home with us now?” I asked in disappointment.

     “I’m sorry, but no, you can’t.  We are very diligent with who we let adopt these babies.  There are terrible people who run fight rings and go around trying to get these dogs.  We have to make sure she’s going to a safe place where she’ll be loved and cared for properly.”

     Once he put it to me like that, I fully understood.  The thought of Snowflake in a fight ring horrified me. 

     “I’ll make an extra, generous donation if we can bypass the home visit.” James said.  When the volunteer looked at him suspiciously, James explained that I was up visiting from Los Angeles, and the dog would ultimately be living there though she’d still be in the area for another week.  The volunteer, whom I learned was named Bobby, stopped to think.   He proposed that we do a      home-check at James’ place for now and then once I was back in Los Angeles, they’d have a representative from a rescue they worked with in that area to do a final check.  We both thought that was entirely reasonable, and I was reassured by their caution with the welfare of these animals.  I vowed to add them to my favorite charities list.