Falling for the Secret Billionaire: Part 2 (2 page)

I took a detour on my way to the library and stopped off at the pier to look out at sea to clear my mind. I walked down the splintered wood of the dock until I hit the barrier at the end of it. I sat down on the wood barrier and looked out at sea. I must have played that night with James in my head about a billion times, and I just couldn’t let it go. I could still feel the sensation of his fingertips on my thigh, the waves crashing against the soles of our feet, and the instant connection that we had that night. He had told me that I was the most beautiful girl he had ever met, of course something every girl wants to hear. Greg was never that romantic and I realized that it was going to be a long while until I found that kind of love again, if I ever did. I didn’t think I could have those feelings for someone, how could I know if I would ever feel them again? Next to me I spotted two seagulls perched on the street lamp. They were cuddled next to each other and I couldn’t help think to myself, that even birds had found love. I knew it was simple, but as humans, we like to make things a lot more difficult than they need to be. I could have stood there and spoken to James and believed what he told me. Society taught me to not believe men, I couldn’t believe Greg or James so I had to get out of there as fast as possible so that I could make my own decision. Three months later, and I still hadn’t come up with a conclusion.

I felt like a terrible person, Greg had been rushed to the hospital that night and stayed there overnight. He tried to phone me but I never answered the phone to him either. I know that a good person would have been there for him but I felt so conflicted, and frankly I was pissed that he had to go about spying on us and trying to dig up any kind of dirt he could on James. If Greg had just left us alone, things would have been going well still. Maybe with time, James would have explained to me what he does for a living. He just wanted to make sure I wasn’t a gold digger. If that was the case, I was still utterly in love with him. What scared me the most was uncertainty. What if what Greg said had been true? Maybe James was this terrible person that made all his wealth off of evicting people in poor communities to develop his big projects over top of these once poor suburbs.

I looked at my watch and realized that 20 minutes had gone by already. My shift started in 10 minutes and I had better hurry if I hoped to make it there on time. I picked up my purse and walked back down towards the street. The streets were nearly empty, not a person in sight. I could hear some noise coming from the highway a few blocks down but otherwise I couldn’t see a soul in sight. It was such a freeing feeling knowing that I was the only one there. It gave me a chance to clear my head from all of the ongoing commotion in my life.

I reached the library, and walked up the large grand steps out front and unlocked the door. No Jasmine flowers waiting inside for me, but it was better this way. Despite memories of James being everywhere around me, I was excited to work well today and do a good job. I wouldn’t let him bother my thoughts today. I walked to the back room and up to the control panel to switch on the main lights in the library. There is no other liberating feeling in the world than knowing that you’re in control of something. For me, it was one of the most magical sights seeing the library completely barren in the morning, at that time of day, it was all mine.

I walked to the front and unlocked the front doors. We were officially open for business for the day.
Come at me customers
I thought to myself as I sat myself down in front of the large bureau near the front hall of the library. In one of the drawers, we all kept the books we were reading at the time. I was reading
The Great Gatsby
and had fallen in love with the character Daisy. She had to be the luckiest girl in the world. A billionaire threw these large extravagant parties for her only in the hopes that she would come to one of them one day. Even though she used to be in love with Gatsby, she acted stubbornly when it came to love. She reminded me a lot of myself. I knew deep inside that I could have had something magical with James but I had let it slip through my fingers because things weren’t exactly in perfect circumstances. As I was half way through my page, a customer walked in. Not our typical customer, he was dressed in a black suit, white shirt, and black tie with aviator shades. It seemed to be a very formal look for someone just looking to rent a book. I greeted him as he walked in, but he gave me no response. He looked like he was in a rush and he walked straight back to the cooking help section in the back. No one ever went there, it was such a odd thing I thought to myself, but whatever, to each their own I guess. I thought nothing of it and continued reading my book. Just as quick as he came in, he left. He strode up to the counter and put the book on the desk.

“Just this.”

“Okay, sure, so you’re not the best at cooking huh?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

Obviously this man did not want to have a friendly conversation so I left it at that. I rang the book through the libraries computer and sent him on his way. As soon as he left, I continued to put my feet up on the desk and started the next page of my novel. The library was the perfect place to relax. I could lean back in my chair and lose my thoughts when looking at the painted arched ceilings of the building, and the bookshelves that seemed to go for miles. When I was a child I imagined the large pillars of this very library reaching into the depths of heaven. I imagined that when I passed away and got there one day, there would be an unlimited supply of books to read and I would be able to have access to this library.

Before I knew it, the suspicious man was back. Holding the book under his arm he walked up to me and slammed it down on the counter.

“Wasn’t what I was expecting, sorry I’d like to return it.”

“Uh okay, no worries, do you want a suggestion of what to read? Maybe I can help.”

“No that will be it madam.” He turned his back to me and strode out the wide doors at the front, I looked out the window and he was running down the steps of the library before getting into the passenger seat of a black Mercedes and driving off in a rush.

What a strange fella
I thought to myself.

Although he probably only had the book in his possession for 30 minutes, it was protocol to flip through the pages for damage just in case. I picked up the heavy hardcover book and leaned back in my chair. As soon as I opened it up to the first page, an envelope fell out with my name written on the front.

Part of me knew what it was and if I was thinking straight I should have thrown it in the garbage straight away but my curiosity was too strong to stray away from such a strange encounter. I grabbed the antique letter opener from the counter and tore open the crisp white envelope in one fluid motion. The letter I pulled out was hand written and I immediately recognized it as James’ writing. It was short, but long enough to get his point across.

Dear Jasmine,

I know that you don’t want to talk to me right now, but this silent treatment is killing me.

I don’t expect you to return my phone call, but if you want to meet so that I can answer all of your questions, I’m willing.

I’m sorry to send in one of my men to deliver this note, but the police have asked me to stay away from you and Greg.

Leave another note in this book with a meeting time and place, then slide it back into the exact same spot on the shelf it came from.

Give me a time and place and I’ll be there.

I promise.

Your’s truly,

James

Tears started streaming down the apples of my cheeks. I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Here I was thinking that I could have a day free of thinking about James, and today was the day he decided to make a serious move towards meeting me. I knew he wouldn’t have been able to be there himself. He was closely monitored and I probably would have kicked him out the second he stepped through the door. I was infuriated at how he had gone about trying to contact me at my work place, and I picked up the lighter from my pocket and lit the letter on fire, throwing it in the empty metal-netted waste bin. To send him a true message that I didn’t want to meet, I checked out the cooking book myself. I would take it home with me that night and try to forget about him. If his butler or whatever he was, set foot in the library again, I would kick him out before I gave him a chance to say a word to me.

The rest of my shift went by painfully slow. I went through the rest of the day acting as if I were a zombie. Any time I customer would come in or check out a book, I would give them the automatic “Hello, how’s it going, okay thanks, have a great day” but I wouldn’t say more. I wasn’t my normal bubbly self, and it was all because of James. He had ruined the one great day I had had in months and my mind couldn’t leave the rage behind. I was bubbling with anger on the inside, I wanted to tear down the bookshelves, and throw a couple of lamps through the stained glass windows.

When 5 pm finally came around, I was out the door by 5:01 pm and flagged a cab from the middle of the street. I made no attempt of small talk with the taxi driver and he seemed to be able to tell that I was having a shitty day because he kept to himself for the most part and kept his eyes on the road.

I was not a joy to be around. When the taxi pulled up in front of my home. I tossed a 20-dollar bill in the front seat, got out, and slammed the car door behind me. I was trying my best not to break down and cry. When I got in these moods, my defense was to act like a bitch around everyone. As I walked up the path towards the door, I kicked over the garden gnome that Keisha had planted and kicked over the flower port next to our mailbox. I scrambled for my keys inside my purse and swiftly unlocked the door, once again slamming it behind me. Keisha was sitting on the old brown couch in the living room watching some chick flick and I didn’t have the patience to talk to her. I stormed past her into my bedroom and closed the door.

With my back to the door, I sunk down to my knees and burst out crying. I was an emotional rollercoaster and I couldn’t get myself to calm down. I began to hyper ventilate and curled up into a fetal position on my brown carpeted floor. I could hear Keisha pounding on the door asking if I was okay but I wasn’t in the mood to tell her the story of what happened that day so I ignored her aggressive pounding on the door. I grabbed the white duvet from my mattress and pulled it down onto the ground with me. I curled up on the floor with my duvet, too frantic to even get to my bed. I wanted to feel this emotion for everything that it was and decided to cry it out until I had no more tears left in me.

When I finally stopped crying, my head was pounding. I felt like I had lost my body weight in water through all of the tears that I had shed. My purse was a few feet away from me and I reached out for it urgently remembering that I still had the book in my bag. I pulled it out and analyzed the cover. An old cookbook from the 1980’s with a cover so faded I could hardly make out what the picture on the cover was. James had always found the most creative ways of getting to me. I couldn’t understand why he had picked a simple girl like me. I took the book and I put it on the under side of my mattress. Hopefully if I had it out of sight, I wouldn’t be thinking about it so much. I fell down onto my bed in exhaustion. Everything felt like a huge effort… I left my work clothes and high heels on and fell asleep. I was too bothered to even get up to brush my teeth of take off the mascara that had streamed down my cheeks and neck. Maybe after this, he would leave me alone. Or maybe, he would continue trying to pursue me. Deep inside, I knew that I wanted the latter to take place but I couldn’t figure out why I was still so attracted to him.

*****

I woke up the next morning at around 5 am so that I could avoid talking to Keisha. I got dressed out of my former workdays clothes and put on a cute baby pink yoga top and grey crop pants with my favourite purple Nike shoes. I packed everything I needed for work in a nap sack and went for a job along the beach.

I sneaked out of my house as quietly as I could, and I shut the door behind me. It had been a long time since I had gone for a run. Keisha had always maintained her fitness, but I went through phases. The last few months I had completely lost it; I reverted back to wearing frumpy dresses to work so that I could get away with eating whatever I wanted when I got into my mopey state of mind when I became unbearably lonely in the evenings. It was a beautiful morning. Despite the gloominess in my mind, the flowers were blooming and the birds were chirping. Summer was coming, and I was nowhere near prepared for it. I took out my iPod from my pocket and put my headphones in my ears to block out any outside noise that could be heard from a distance. I picked my favourite work out play list that consisted of upbeat tunes with artists like Britney Spears and Fergie to really get me pumped to run.