Falling Away (38 page)

             
But when I peeked through the door of
my studio, my laughter came to an abrupt halt
, my neck and facial muscles cringing.
I’m sorry. When did hell freeze over and pigs start flying loop-de-loops? ‘Cause I apparently missed the memo about the apocalypse.

             
I cautiously slid the chain off and unlocked the deadbolt. The door seemed to creak louder than normal, probably picking up on my nervousness as my fingers slightly trembled around the doorknob.

             
“Mrs. Jennings,” I deadpanned, happy my voice didn’t crack.

             
She gave me a curt nod. “Jenna. May I come in?”

             
“Yeah, sure.” I extended the door’s opening, hesitating to close it behind her. Surely my dark hole of an apartment would send her fleeing for her life. When it didn’t, I reluctantly closed it.

             
She didn’t venture far into the room. Not that she had far to go in four hundred square feet in the first place. I had no idea what type of vibrant designer clothes she was wearing, but I couldn’t help but notice she was stripped of all her fine jewelry. Probably afraid she’d get mugged coming to what she considered the riffraff part of town. The phrase
stuck out like a sore thumb
didn’t even begin to cover how off she looked standing next to my beat up furniture, muted color tones and aging walls.

             
I only had the one chair, which she took without showing her disgust at its condition, though she chose to cross her arms and rest her hands over her black leather purse in her lap instead of touching the abraded wooden arms. That left me the edge of my bed, which made us close enough to bump knees…and still within choking range without a referee.

             
Damn it. Surely Robert was smirking right now. Had I never allowed my phone to die, he could’ve called to warn me she was coming. Having email access
only
at work and the local library was truly screwing me right now.

             
She watched me carefully, but for once there wasn’t a menacing expression to go along with it. Her eyes then diverted to my neck and I saw them pinch slightly.
She’s here for the stone! Why else would she travel all this way?
My hand instinctively wrapped around my necklace, as if to protect it. After releasing a pent up huff, she said, “I didn’t like the way we ended our last conversation. It’s been eating away at me.”

             
“Ok-
aaay
.” Oh, this can’t be good. And the walls here were paper thin. My nosy neighbors were always calling the police when a raucous broke out in one of the apartments, and Lord knew the two of us didn’t have a problem getting into a screaming match.

             
Meekly, I asked, “How’d you find me?” And was my apartment going to mysteriously blow up once you left?

             
A tiny smile curled her lips. “Jenna, it doesn’t matter where you go. Money always talks.” Awesome. Now my paranoid ass was gonna start looking over my shoulder all the time. “My son told me you still intend to attend Rutgers.”

             
“That’s right,” I confirmed. Why the hell were they discussing me at all?

             
“When do you begin?”

             
“I’m deferring my acceptance for a year or two. I can’t afford to go just yet.”

             
“My dear, working in that little bookshop and living
here
, won’t save you enough money. Why don’t you just apply for a school loan?”

             
“Can’t qualify.”

             
“Why not?”

             
Man this woman was nosy. If I didn’t still love her son I’d tell her to shove it up her
ass
and kick her out. “I have no money, no credit history, the economy’s crap, and I have no one to co-sign the loan with me. They’re not exactly chomping at the bit to help me.”

             
“What about the state? Isn’t it their duty to help people like you in situations like these?”

             
People like me? We’re called orphans, you bitch.
“They’d help if I wanted to attend somewhere in Vermont, but the schools aren’t a good match for the degree I want.”

             
She scanned my pitiful room, then refocused on my necklace, which I still hadn’t released from my grip. “You know, you’ve got your college tuition and then some wrapped around your neck. Why didn’t you just sell it and get on with making something of your life?”

             
It was a good thing she said that without bitterness, otherwise I’d be trying out that new chokehold I learned in that free self-defense class down at the Y. I was well aware of what the diamond around my neck was worth, and that yes, it would take care of all my monetary issues for a long time to come. But its sentimental value outweighed that worth. I’d never sell it.

             
Not that I felt she deserved an explanation, or would even understand my reasoning, but still I replied, “I’ll never sell it.” And in order to sell Robert’s effort to hide our newfound friendship, I sadly added, “It’s all I have left of him.” An Oscar worthy performance and she hardly acknowledged it.

             
“Yes, well... I suppose you won’t have to sell it now. My husband’s been at me to choose my charity projects for the year and I’ve decided on making a monetary contribution to your education.”

             
Deadpanned couldn’t even begin to describe the lack of emotion for the words I had for her. Very slowly, I replied, “Thank you for your consideration, but I am not a charity project.”

             
She found that amusing, ‘cause clearly I was from her point of view. “So I’ve been told by my son multiple times over the years. But he agrees with me on this occasion. He’d very much like for you to accept this opportunity.”

             
Yeah? Then why wasn’t he here to smooth the way? Or give me a heads up? Surely he knew putting me alone in a room with his mother was the equivalent of asking
Cruella
de
Vil
to volunteer at the local puppy farm.

             
“If it helps your ego, think of it as more of a pay-it-forward situation. Once you get established with your life and your pocket book is comfortable, you can help do the same for someone else in a position similar to yours.”

             
Hmm. I wondered if Robert told her to say that, ‘cause it was just the thing that would work on me. I desperately wanted to take her up on it. Who wouldn’t want their education paid for? But this was Penelope Jennings. Surely there was a hidden agenda in this somewhere. “Why would you do that?”

             
“Because try as I might, I can’t find a legitimate reason to dislike you.” Her words made my face scrunch up. Who the hell says that? “I know I’ve been hard on Robert these past several years, and you by association, but I was only doing what any good mother would do. I want the best for him, so I want him to marry into the best.”

             
Apparently, she liked seeing my face in agony, ‘cause she wasn’t doing anything to reduce the cringe to my facial muscles.
             

             
“After all, it’s what my parents did to me. You see, I didn’t want to date Robert’s father any more than Robert wanted to date Anne. At least in the beginning. I only did it to placate my parents’ wishes, but with time I actually became fond of Michael. And that fondness slowly grew to love. That’s why I kept pushing Anne on him, and constantly inviting their family to spend time with us. Merging our families would be extremely beneficial to both. Not to be discourteous, but Anne and her family is in the same league as ours. You’re not.”

             
Bitch
. Now I was tempted to take the money and run, just to say a big, fat
screw you!
Ready to get up and throw her condescending ass out of my apartment, I paused when she added, “And I’ve noticed something these past few months, but perhaps didn’t pay particular attention to until we had our
discussion
.”

             
Glad she found it enlightening, ‘cause we were on the verge of another.

             
“Robert never smiles anymore. Not really. Nothing that isn’t forced anyway. Not like he did when he was with you. For those two and a half years it’s all I ever saw. Though I’m confident he’ll find happiness again as their relationship grows, like my husband’s and mine did, I’m left with an appreciation for what you gave him when you were together. You gave my son natural happiness. And I wanted to thank you for giving him that feeling for as long as you did.”

             
Who’s to say that’s over? I was still considering his proposal of coming back home to him. “Can we be straight here for a minute? Just tell me. Are you trying to pay me off to keep me from being with Robert?” And did she suspect his sudden good mood as of late might have something to do with me?

             
“No,” she replied matter-of-factly. “That’s not even up for debate. Even after what happened at
Jhett’s
wedding, Robert and Anne are still together.” I felt my eyes widen a bit, and Mrs. Jennings nodded knowingly. “Yes. I know about the wedding. Anne expressed her
concerns
about the two of you reconnecting, and I talked her down from leaving him. After all, it’s not like he broke up with her after that night, so why should she? Their relationship was tested, and still they endured. Even after you shouted that you loved him in our house, they’re still together. So no, I don’t feel the need to buy off your affections.”

             
Oh, wow. This woman was so
freakin
’ delusional. But kudos to Anne for selling their continuing relationship. The girl really didn’t want
pics
of her goods spread around.
             

             
“But my son still cares for you, and when I suggested continuing to pay for your education, it was the first true smile I got from him in a long time. That’s why I’m here.”

             
My chest released a sigh I didn’t even realize had built up inside me. No wonder Robert was stressed out all the time now. This woman was exhausting. And it didn’t help when she felt the need to add, “I’m not trying to insult you, Jenna, and I don’t mean to rub their relationship in your face, but I need you to know he’s moved on. And so should you.”

After all the bus rides I had taken over the past ten months, this had to be the longest. I sorta regretted wearing the
dark red
dress that ended mid-thigh, as a guy sitting near me couldn’t seem to keep his eyes off my thighs, regardless that I so obviously put my duffel in the seat beside me to minimize his view. But even this creep wasn’t gonna ruin my jovial mood.

             
I’d just finished my first week of school at Rutgers, paid for by the Penelope Jennings’ Grant.
Bleh
…but I was hardly in a position to complain. Robert and Anne’s breakup hit the fan last weekend, so
Mommie
Dearest was apparently on the warpath all week. Luckily, my name had been kept out of the scandal, so I didn’t have to worry about her threatening to pull my funding. Robert said his dad wouldn’t let her do it anyway, even if she tried for some reason.

             
My tuition wasn’t the only thing getting covered. I was given a decent one bedroom apartment within walking distance of campus, some extra spending money to cover basic needs, and had my old phone reactivated. All of which I was pretty sure was Robert’s doing. I was glad we were able to move forward as friends, though he continued to ask me to come
back home
.

             
I’d been thinking about that a lot lately.
Home
. Some people considered home as their physical address, for others, it was simply where their heart lay. Me? It took awhile to figure that out. But now that I had, I was determined to get what was mine. My
home
.