Fade to Red (20 page)

After they hung up, the conversation kept playing back in Ian’s mind. He loved Donny and hoped he had a lot of years left. But he didn’t ever want to get so detached from living that it took nearly dying to see what he had. The thought seemed foreign now—he knew how great his life was and didn’t think the gratefulness would ever fade, but … it happened all the time. Even people who seemed to have it all struggled with complacency, boredom … discontentment. What kept passion alive?

Water splashed in his face and he was glad for the distraction. He didn’t need to get all emo on their morning off. He’d keep thinking about it though and maybe a song would come out of it, maybe some answers. He looked down at his little girl and thought his love for her would explode right out of his chest. She loved the water. He held her back against his chest and her little feet went crazy, kicking. Leo jumped in the pool and swam up to him, smiling at Journey. The little boy was such a nice kid, and he was gentle with Journey, so that made Ian like him even more.

Sparrow jumped into the pool and wrapped her arms around his back.

“You okay?” she asked. “You’re so quiet today.”

“Just thinking. Talking to Donny got my mind going about some things.”

He turned around to face her and pulled her close. Her legs still fit around his waist with Journey between them.

“Do I tell you enough how this life with you is the best gift I’ve ever been given?” he asked, reaching out to touch her face.

“Every day.”

Sparrow stretched out on a lounger next to Chloe. Roxie and Leo played in the pool for a while and then went to get a snack at the vending machine. When they came back, Leo got back in the pool and Roxie stayed by Sparrow and Chloe. They were talking in hushed voices and laughing a lot, which made Ian suspect they were discussing sex. Sparrow claimed he thought everything was about sex, though. Not necessarily true …not
everything
. He’d done a lot of reflecting today without sex being in the forefront of his mind. Granted, keeping passion alive did involve sex too, but … okay, maybe everything did go back to sex. But, really, what was so wrong with that?

Leo did a huge jump in the pool and Ian called out: “Solid 7!” Journey laughed so hard she got the hiccups. “Journey thinks that should’ve been an 8.”

Leo wanted to make her laugh again, so the game began. Ian and Journey were the judges; Ian with a score between one and ten, and Journey with how loud she cackled. She thought Leo was the funniest human she’d ever seen.

They’d met Chloe and Leo once before, but Roxie usually didn’t come around when he was in town. Ian didn’t blame her. He’d want his family all to himself too. Sparrow always spent extra time with Roxie when Leo went back home. She was lost without her boy.

The girls sat up and Roxie jumped off the lounger. He and Leo paused the game to see what was going on.

“I forgot my outfit for tonight!” she yelled. “I’ll run over there now, so I’ll have plenty of time to eat and get ready. Wanna ride with me, Leo, or stay in the pool?”

“Stay in the pool!”

“Of course.” She smiled and blew him a kiss. “I won’t be long!”

She hadn’t been gone five minutes when a redhead walked into the pool area and asked Sparrow if Roxie was still there. She stopped in mid-sentence when she saw Ian and he regretted not going underwater when he saw her come in the gate. She looked like a vulture ready to strike. She stepped closer to the pool and looked down at him.

“Ian Sterling? How did I get so lucky?” She flashed teeth and put a hand on her hip. “Roxie Taylor sure gets around.”

“Not sure what you’re implying. I’m here with my family,” he said.

Leo popped up beside him.

“Hey, Leo, would you please sit with the girls for a minute?” Ian asked.

“And then I can get back in the pool?”

“Of course.”

Leo swam to the ledge and climbed out.

“And you are?” Ian looked at the girl.

“Mirielle Wethers, with
Rolling Stone
. I’ve been leaving messages for you for weeks. Looks like I just needed to find Roxie to find
you
.” She smirked and stepped into the shade.

“Ah, Mirielle, you need to stop with the Roxie innuendos. Beckham told me about you and if I’d wished to speak to you, I would’ve called you back. That’s how that works.” He looked over his shoulder to Sparrow. “Hey, baby, could you come here, please?”

Sparrow shifted her long legs off the lounger. He got out of the pool and enjoyed watching her walk toward him.

He looked at Mirielle, who wasn’t bothering to hide her annoyance. “This is my wife, Sparrow. If you say anything about me, it should be that I love my wife. We’re having a little time off before the show tonight, and I’m asking you to leave. Now.”

Her eyes flashed and she stepped closer. “I just want-”

“No.” He handed Journey to Sparrow. “Call Will,” he said under his breath.

Sparrow walked away with the baby and called Will. He’d taken a break right before Mirielle came, but Ian knew he wasn’t far. In moments, Will was walking toward them.

“Quit giving
Rolling Stone
a bad name—we know you don’t work for them anymore.” Ian turned and said over his shoulder: “This is Will—he’ll make sure you get to your car safely.”

He put a towel around his neck and waited until Mirielle was gone before getting back into the pool.

Roxie pounded on Beckham’s door.

“Hey! Come in!” He was smiling until he got a good look at her face. “What’s going on?”

He took her hand and led her up the steps. She was clutching something in one hand, but held onto him with the other.

“Hey, you’re shaking. What happened?”

“I went to wardrobe just now—I meant to grab my first dress last night, so I could hang out at the hotel as long as possible, and-” She held up her dress.

It looked like a blowtorch had been taken to it. Completely charred. Beckham barely touched it and material crackled to the ground.

“What the hell?” His eyes were huge.

“All of my outfits are like this. Only mine. After the other night, when I stayed with you … my blanket and all my books were cut up into little pieces. I didn’t-”

“
What?
Why didn’t you tell me?” he demanded.

“I didn’t want to bring you into it. I hoped it was just a pointless stunt and nothing serious.” A tear fell down her cheek and she angrily swiped it away.

“Hey, come here.” He hugged her close then pulled back just enough to study her face. “This involves me, whatever happens with you. I care about you and want to make sure you’re always safe. I can’t do that if you keep me in the dark. Don’t shut me out. Okay?”

She nodded.

“What’s going on here?”

“Well, I was mad, but now I’m scared, too. I confronted Brooke and-”

“Wait a minute—Brooke? You think she did this?”

“She’s the only one I’ve had any issues with and she seemed to think it was funny the other day. She said I couldn’t prove that she did it.”

Beckham shook his head. “Brooke? I know she’s not the nicest person, but I’ve never thought she’d do anything this awful. You really think it’s her?”

“I trust everyone but her. As crazy as it sounds, I still think she purposely tripped Sparrow, hoping she’d get that song with Ian. And I don’t know how anyone else would get on the bus.”

“Okay, let me get my phone. I’ll need to talk to Nate and security, and eventually Brooke too.”

Anthony knocked before Beckham had called anyone. Nate stood beside him, mumbling something under his breath.

“You look like the grim reapers, coming to carry us off to our death. I guess you’ve heard about it already?” Beckham asked, stepping aside to let them in.

They stopped short when they saw Roxie.

Nate cleared his throat. “I wanted to wait until after the show but didn’t want you blindsided by any reporters. There’s a pile of reporters out there, ready to pounce on this story.”

“How would the reporters know about any of this?”

Nate and Anthony looked at Beckham like he’d lost it.

“What do you mean? They’re the ones who came out with the story,” Nate said.

“How did they find out about Roxie’s things?”

They looked at Roxie then and back to Beckham. Nate shook his head. “No, I don’t know anything about that…”

“The story just came out about the two of you having a son,” Anthony jumped in.

“What? What are you talking about?” Beckham stuttered.

They all looked at Roxie and she turned completely white. Her mouth opened, but no words came out.

“
What?
” Beckham said, turning to Roxie.

She knew her eyes looked wild and she shook her head, but still couldn’t say anything. Tears fell, but she didn’t know if the tears were new or from all she’d just told him.

“I didn’t believe it was true, but now I’m not so sure,” Anthony said, staring at Roxie. “We came over here to do damage control with the press, but it looks like the joke might be on us. Is Leo Beckham’s son, Roxie?”

“Are you kidding me?
Leo
?” Beckham looked at everyone in the room, as if the facts were striking him like bullets, one right after the other.

Her stomach fell. She realized how this might look. She’d been distant and angry from the beginning, trying to do everything she could to keep him at a distance. Instead of using it to her advantage, she’d been shaken that the press had taken their pictures. Most dancers would have killed for any press, but she’d been the opposite of what he’d expected every time.

And he’d taken her virginity and forgotten about her. She had every reason to be bitter.

She knew it didn’t look good, but she couldn’t seem to stop shaking long enough to defend herself. This day—it was one too many slivers of insane.

Beckham walked within a foot of Roxie, all earlier softness gone. He stopped in front of her and put both hands on the wall, on either side of her face. He leaned down until they were about an inch apart.

“Who is Leo, Roxie?”

“My son,” she whispered.

“You have a—that little boy is
yours
?” He shook his head, but his eyes still didn’t seem focused. “Why didn’t you tell me you have a son? Is he
mine
?” His voice was quiet but harsh.

She shoved him away from her. She felt like she was looking at a stranger.

“
No
, he isn’t yours! What the hell are you thinking?”

“Let me see a picture of him.” He pointed to Nate and grabbed the paper out of his hands. A picture of Leo and Roxie was blown up. He sucked in a breath and sat down, staring at the picture.

When he looked up at Roxie, his eyes were tortured. “I know Leo. I met him. At the audition, I met him. I saw him again yesterday. Mavid,” he whispered. He shook his head. “He’s … a great kid.” He looked at the ceiling and stood back up, walking close to her. “Here’s what the hell I’m thinking:
he looks like me
! I’m thinking, how the hell did I not see it the very first time we met? I’m thinking, you’ve been hating me since you got here and I haven’t fully made sense of it. Until now…” He ran his hands through his curly hair and pointed at it and then the picture of Leo. “His hair is just like mine. His eyes are the same weird color as mine … the way we-” His voice broke and he hit the wall next to him.

Roxie jumped. She was terrified and ready to bolt. “I
told
you why I hated you. And Leo looks like his
dad
.”

“I didn’t realize how
much
you really hated me. Now I know. I just … I can’t even believe this. I want to get to know him.” He took a jagged breath. “
Fuck
, Roxie. How could you keep this from me?”

“He is
not
yours,” she hissed.

He studied her face. “Look at me and show me the truth. Right now I only see lies. You’ve been lying to me all along. Why didn’t you tell me you had a son?” He laughed, but it sounded hollow. “We slept together. Don’t you think you should have told me that little fact about yourself?”

Pain zigzagged through her heart and she staggered back against the wall. “I’ve just tried to do a good job. And yes, I’ve gotten carried away with you. I’ve … lost my mind … about you. Again.” A sob escaped and she clamped her hand over her mouth, the tears pooling into her hand. “I’ve missed Leo so much, I cry every time I talk to him. I’ve never been away from him like this. He’s come to see me throughout the tour, and I figured you’d meet him when the time was right. I just needed to get through the tour. I didn’t expect…”

“I’d like to get a paternity test,” he said. As if she hadn’t spoken a word. “If you won’t willingly do it, I’ll get a court order to make it happen.”

She gulped and looked everywhere but at him. “I only came here to dance and to provide for Leo. It’s obviously not working. I need to leave-” She stopped when he grabbed her arm.

“You’re not making sense. We have more than
worked
, we’ve had something between us from the very beginning … or at least, the beginning that I can remember. But that has nothing to do with this. Or maybe everything to do with it. I just want to know the truth! Why aren’t you telling me the truth?” he asked desperately.