Fade to Red (15 page)

She didn’t look at Beckham once as they walked back to the bus. But fuck it all … kissing her had been worth it. He wanted to ask if he’d really blown it with her, but the thought of how she’d felt in his arms was too right. It couldn’t be a mistake. She wanted him too, no question. It clarified everything for him.

When they reached the buses, Roxie said, “That can’t happen again, Beckham.”

“Why not?” he asked, his heart deflating.

“I know you might remember me differently—if you ever start to remember me at all—but I’m not just some groupie, Beckham. I can’t just … have meaningless flings whenever I get a whim. I’m a responsible adult who has to make responsible decisions and you are
not
a responsible decision.” She turned around to walk away.

It was like a sharp kick in the gut. He felt sick.

“Roxie, wait. Please. Don’t shut me out again. It was just a
kiss
.”

She glared at him.

“I know,” his voice rushed out, while he held onto her arm, “it was so much more than that, wasn’t it? I felt it too.”

He looked at her and wished she could see into his mind and heart, how he felt about her.

“I’m not proud of my past. Not at all.” He looked up at the sky and took a breath. “Please hear me. I don’t need another meaningless fling, Roxie. I want
you
. We’re not there yet, but … I’m dying for you to give me a chance. And I
don’t mean sex
,” he said, through his teeth. “I mean, me. Please give
me
a chance.”

Her face softened for a second. He really thought she might say yes.

“I’ve gotta go,” she whispered.

He nodded, backed up a step, and let her go.

Beckham and Ian had to be at the TV station that afternoon. Anthony had gone to check the size of the studio the day before and said it was too small for everyone. Roxie would be the only dancer. She seemed fine with Ian and the guys in the band, cracking jokes about the billboards they passed on the way, but she didn’t look at Beckham the whole ride.

Right before he and Ian were supposed to go chat up the host, Rrrrrandy Reynolds, Beckham’s cell buzzed and it was his manager. Nate knew he was due to go on air. Beckham pushed the silencer and seconds later, Anthony called.

Crap, what’s going on?

He put his phone in his pocket and walked out to meet the smiley, tan guy. He didn’t know why he’d agreed to do this show. The guy had jackass written all over him.

Once they had him all hooked up and did the preliminary greetings, they did the countdown to live. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, cheesy music played.

“Beckham Woods and Ian Sterling! Welcome. The two of you have taken the entertainment industry by storm with this combined tour, playing sold-out shows every night. That has to be the best feeling in the world. What made you decide to tour together?” He looked at Beckham.

“It’s been great. When we saw an opportunity to work together, we both jumped at the chance,” Beckham said. “Being onstage with Ian every night—most fun I’ve ever had.”

The host and camera crew let out a loud ‘Awwww’ and Beckham and Ian both laughed.

“I’m the lucky one,” Ian added.

“We’ve got a bromance going on, folks,” Randy Reynolds said, facing the camera. “Lots of romance on this tour, it seems. Your wife is on the tour with you, right, Ian?”

“Yes.” Ian smiled.

“You two have been heating it up onstage too.” He pointed behind them and a clip played of Ian and Sparrow kissing after their song.

Ian laughed. “Keepin’ the love alive,” he said.

“You’re not the only one!” Randy pointed to the screen behind Beckham.

Beckham watched, stunned, as two pictures of him with Roxie flashed in slow succession. Both pictures showed them locked in a passionate kiss, but one was especially explicit. All he saw was tongues. Roxie would kill him. He turned and tried to see her reaction, but the lights were too bright.

“Bastard!” came out of Beckham’s mouth before he could stop it. He wanted to first wring the restaurant manager’s neck for basically handing the photographer a perfect shot and then have a go at the guy in front of him. “What kind of show is this?”

Randy laughed at Beckham, as if they were in on a joke together. His smile dimmed somewhat when he saw the look in Beckham’s eyes, and he started talking quickly to cover the awkward pause that filled the air.

“What happens in Vegas doesn’t
always
stay in Vegas,” he said with a nervous chuckle. “It’s great to see you dating again. There’s been a long lull, hasn’t there? You haven’t really been linked with anyone since … your rehab stint. Who’s the lucky lady?”

“I’m here to talk about the show tonight. 8 p.m. at MGM Grand. Hope to see you there,” he said to the camera, paused a moment, and then pulled off his lapel mic.

Randy frantically motioned for the cameraman to cut. His expression was panicked until the camera turned to Ian. Randy’s face suddenly brightened with his phony smile.

“So how does your wife handle all the groupies? I know they must come out in the droves with both you
and
Beckham.”

Ian sat back in his seat, crossed his arms, and stared down the host. He didn’t say a word. The man began fidgeting. Sweat beaded on his forehead and upper lip.

“So the music…” he started.

“There we go,” Ian leaned forward, “that’s the direction you take in interviewing a musician. What do you want to know?”

“I-uh, what have you learned musically from Beckham and what do you think he’s learned from you?”

“I’ve learned that I suck as a dancer, unlike Beckham. And musically, playing with someone as talented as Beckham makes anyone better. Pushes me to work harder.” He shrugged. “You’d have to ask him what he’s learned from me.” He gave the host a shit-eating grin that was not returned.

“Thanks for your time today. Ian Sterling, everyone. Make sure you come out to see Ian and Beckham Woods tonight. After the commercial, we’ll…”

The producer rushed as far forward as he could without being in the shot. He was shaking his head and sliding a hand across his throat.

“We’ll b-be back,” Randy stuttered. His shoulders drooped when the commercial started. “I thought they were singing,” he said to the producer and waved an arm toward Ian.

Ian was already taking off his microphone. “Doesn’t look like we’ll be singing today,” he said. “Jerky thing to do, man, bringing up rehab and then pictures of an obviously private moment? Not cool.”

Randy sneered, nothing close to a smile, phony or otherwise.

Ian shook his head, gave him the bird, and stalked off.

The band and Roxie were on the sidelines, watching everything. Beckham was pacing the hall by the exit. No one said a word. They filed out behind him and crawled back into the limo. Somehow Beckham ended up by Roxie.

“Shit, I coulda slept longer,” Taz joked.

T.J. bopped him on the head. “Shut up, Taz.”

They all looked at Beckham and Roxie. She flushed and looked out the window.

“I’m really sorry, Roxie,” Beckham said softly.

She looked at him and barely nodded. “I know you didn’t mean for that to happen.”

He leaned his head back on the seat and pulled out his cell phone. He had a few voicemails and texts waiting. He texted Howie, even though Howie was in the limo with him.

We need more security. 24 hrs. Extra on Roxie.

Howie checked his phone then looked at Beckham and gave a subtle nod.

As soon as they got back, he went straight to his bus. There was a room booked for him at MGM, but he’d given it to Sierra. He went and stretched out on his bed and called Nate.

“Hey, there you are. Was trying to catch you before you went on the show.”

“Pictures of me with Roxie—are they everywhere?”

“Yep.”

He let out a string of curses as he got up and paced the bus.

“I like this girl, Nate. I don’t want to scare her off. She’s not even sure she likes me most days.”

“Well, that’s a twist,” Nate said. “Maybe we’ll keep her.”

“Shut up.”

He laughed. “So … I’ve gotta ask. I’m assuming Roxie is the one you called about before the tour—is that right?”

Beckham was quiet. “I forgot about that,” he finally said.

“I’ll take that as a yes. Listen, there are a few ways to play this. You can either wait for it to die down, which means don’t get caught with her again. Or, you can just enjoy your tour and not worry about it. Get your picture with some hot fans—or better yet, I heard Taylor Swift will be at tomorrow night’s show. We’ll get a picture and let that circulate a bit.”

“No way am I gonna get messed up in that. She’ll be writing a song about me,” Beckham scoffed.

“That wouldn’t be all bad,” Nate mused. “You know she’s always been hot for you.”

“Piss off, man,” he muttered. He pulled the phone away from his ear when Nate’s laugh got too loud. “Dude, really.”

Nate took a deep breath, but the laugh was still in his voice. “There’s always the last option, which I wouldn’t mind seeing…”

“What’s that?”

“Date Roxie and be out with it. You need a girlfriend, Beck. You’ve paid penance long enough.”

“I kissed her this
morning
, and believe me, it was not her idea.”

“Okay, just tell me how you want to spin this and I’ll get it started-” Nate paused.

“She’s got me all wrapped up…”

“You’ve got it bad.”

“Fuck me, I know it.”

Beckham looked for Roxie at dinner, but she wasn’t there. He saw Sierra grabbing three desserts and jogged over to her.

“Hey. Have you seen Roxie?”

“She’s in the bus. Hiding.” Sierra grinned.

“Is she mad at me?”

“Oh yeah, probably,” she said.

“
Probably?
”

“From what I’ve seen, she seems to stay mad at you.” She took a bite of cheesecake and pointed her fork at him. “I like this girl so much. And that was even before I knew just how tightly she had your balls in a vise.”

“Oh, you know what?” he groaned. “Don’t start, Sierra.”

She laughed.

“Just tell me … how do I get her out of the angry?”

“How much do you like her, Beck?” Sierra’s expression turned serious. “You know you’ve had enough notches on your bedpost…”

Beckham stared at her. “You too?” He ran his hands through his hair and glared at her. “Okay, I deserved that. But … seriously …
mean
.”

She shrugged and sampled the chocolate cake.

He shook his head. “She’s different. I want to get under her skin and know what makes her angry heart tick.”

She paused mid-bite.

“God, I know this is wrong to say because you’re my brother, but … that was kinda hot,” she finally said.

“Is everyone talking about it?” Roxie asked the minute she let Sierra on the bus.

Everyone was at dinner so she had the bus to herself.

“I might have heard a little buzz about it. Honestly, I think everyone thought you might be dating a while ago.”

Roxie tried to tackle her as she walked by and Sierra went sprawling on the bus floor.

“Ow! Dammit, Roxie!” Sierra yelled. “You don’t know me well enough for that yet!”

“I’m so sorry! I can’t even believe I did that, after what happened with Sparrow! I didn’t think you’d go down!” Roxie cried. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Sierra said with a smirk. “Gonna start calling you Brooke.”

Roxie clamped her hand over her mouth and started laughing hysterically.

Sierra pulled her down and hit her over the head with a pillow. “Quit being so bitchy! Go get laid by my hot rock star brother. He wants you bad.” As soon as she said it, she shuddered and mumbled under her breath, “Things I never thought I’d say…”

Roxie stopped laughing. “What did he say?”

“He wants to get in your skin and know what makes your angry heart tick,” Sierra quoted. “If that isn’t sexy, I don’t know what is.”

“This is so weird,” Roxie snapped back.

“
Go get laid and get it over with
!” Sierra repeated, louder.

“Shush! Someone might hear you.”

“I thought everyone was gone,” Sierra whispered.

“They are, but … someone could have heard … outside.”

Sierra rolled her eyes. “Oh lord.”

“Seriously, what am I gonna do?”

They sat up and leaned their backs against the couch.

“I’ve never seen him like this, Roxie. He’s never fought for anyone.”

Roxie’s forehead crunched into a tiny V.

“He’s made a lot of changes, especially the last year, and … I think you can trust him.”

“I don’t know if he’s changed or not. I do know that I should have never risked coming on this tour. It was stupid. Stupid, stupid,
stupid
. I have to just keep my space. Do my job, get paid, and that’s it. No more, no less.”

Sierra looked at Roxie. “He’s one of the good ones, Rox. He really is.” She looked like she was going to say more but stopped.

“What?” Roxie pressed.

“You have the potential to hurt him, really hurt him. That, in itself, is a huge shift.”

“No more than he’s already hurt me, I guarantee that,” Roxie whispered.

“What do you mean?” Sierra leaned up and faced Roxie. “What has he done?”