Fade (16 page)

I put my palms over my eyes and sat there for a long moment after he faded into the background, my heart aching. The fact he’d called me love should have mattered, but I couldn’t think about that when I needed to find the composure to get up and walk into the kitchen with a smile on my face.

Sweet, bubbly Dani was gone. How do you smile after learning something like that? How do you smile knowing you’ll have to open your mouth soon and deliver the worst news anyone could possibly hear?

I’d been so furious at the officer who’d come to tell me about Mom. For the first week, I hated him and for no reason other than him being the one to tell me. He’d been able to smile sympathetically as he held his hat in his hands and delivered the blow still tearing at my heart. The blow that would always hurt. Being on the other side now seemed particularly cruel. To be the one who had to deliver news that would break Chelle’s heart as surely as that officer broke mine.

I couldn’t walk away and leave her in the kitchen alone though.

Dace wanted her to call Beth and her boyfriend. We’d focus on that. She’d ask me about Dani, and I’d tell her to call Beth and Gage, that Dad went out to see if he could find out anything for her. I’d take a deep breath and lie through my teeth. And somehow, Dad or Dace would get here in time to keep me from falling apart too.

I dragged myself up from the step and walked on wooden legs to the kitchen. I took another deep breath and stepped inside.

Chelle turned toward me immediately, her eyes wide and worried.

I didn’t smile like that officer had when he visited. I couldn’t. “I haven’t seen her, Chelle,” I said instead, hoping to keep her from asking me. “Dace asked if you’d called Gage yet. He thinks maybe he and Beth and Mandy should come over here”—and then I lied through my teeth—”and we can tag team phoning all of her friends and usual hangouts to see if they know where she is.”

Narrowing her eyes, she cocked her head to the side like Dace did when trying to figure something out. And then her shoulders shook and she nodded.

I think she knew I was trying to divert her attention, but she played along, maybe for the same reason I did. Because the truth was too terrible to put to words.

“I’ll do that,” she said softly.

I nearly sighed; relieved she had something to focus on for the moment. I made my way around the kitchen table and to the coffee pot instead. “Have you eaten anything?”

She fished her phone from her coat pocket. “I’m not very hungry.”

“Coffee?”

“Tea, if you have any.” She flipped open the phone then dialed.

I started making a fresh pitcher. My hands trembled, and I sent up a quick prayer, beyond grateful that she was too occupied with her phone call to notice. I didn’t have another blatant lie in me. Had she asked, I couldn’t have kept pretending I knew nothing about Dani. I would have had to tell her.

I suddenly understood how she must have felt when I’d put her in the middle. I regretted doing that to her more in that moment than I’d ever regretted anything before. She’d spent the last night of her sister’s life trying to take care of me, only for me to repay her with harsh words and stony silence. I felt awful.

She finished her call and then made another.

I couldn’t hear her exact words, but I knew she talked to Beth this time, that she was trying to keep her calm.

My throat burned with unshed tears. I barely knew any of the girls, but I liked all three of them. Chelle especially. She was quiet and wise and gentle. A loyal friend. A quiet port. My heart broke for her and Beth, and for Dani.

Who could possibly want to hurt her? To kill her?

Comfort and concern came pouring through the link between me and Dace again.
I’ll be there soon
, he said.

I lacked the mental power to offer little more than a weak whisper in response.
Hurry, please.

“Beth still hasn’t heard from her.” Chelle flipped her cell phone closed and took a deep, shaky breath. “It’s not like Dani. She always answers if Beth or I call. Something is wrong, Arionna.” Her shoulders shook.

“Have you tried to contact Ronan?”

Dace growled in my head as soon as I said Ronan’s name. I felt a little like growling myself.

“I don’t have his number.” Chelle’s entire body trembled this time.

My heart physically ached at the sight of her trembling with fear. I crossed the kitchen and laid my hand on her shoulder, trying the only way I could to provide a little comfort. “We’ll figure it out, Chelle.”

“Thank you.” She squeezed my hand. “I didn’t think you’d seen her, but Gage was at work, and I didn’t know where else to go … .”

“I’m glad you came,” I told her, meaning it. I might not have wanted to be the one to deliver that horrible news to her, but knowing she felt comfortable enough to come touched me. I appreciated that she thought of me first when she needed a friend. “When did you see her last?”

Chelle seemed to think about the question for a minute. “When we left the rave. I talked to her for a minute before following you and Dace so he could … .” She shook her head as if she didn’t know why she’d taken over for Dace.

I hadn’t realized he’d been the one to take me to his place. I guess I should have known Chelle hadn’t been able to get me to his house, but the thought hadn’t registered.

“She wondered if Ronan had done something to upset you and wanted to know if you were okay. I told her you had a bad migraine, and Dace was taking you home. She didn’t believe me, but she didn’t pry. She said she hoped you got to feeling better.”

Tears threatened again. I cleared my throat roughly to keep them at bay. “She didn’t come home at all?”

Chelle’s expression fell further. “No. Beth said she got bored after Ronan left and decided to go home early. I thought she was still with Beth, and she thought Dani came home. We didn’t know she was missing until Beth got home from Mandy’s today. And she’s not answering her phone. That’s not like her. She always answers for us.”

I don’t think Chelle even realized that she’d already said that. I didn’t remind her. I squeezed her shoulder in silent support and searched for something else to say, for something else to ask. Nothing came to mind.

My silence didn’t seem to register with her. She simply sat there, staring down at the glass of tea in front of her. I think some part of her already knew things were as bad as she feared. Everyone always says multiples have that sort of instinct about one another. Watching her, I could believe it. She looked exactly how I’d felt in the days after Mom died.

I’d desperately wanted to believe there’d been some mistake, that the police had gotten Mom mixed up with someone else. Every time the phone rang or the door opened, I’d held my breath, waiting for it to be her number on Caller ID, or her voice calling out to me. It never had been, but even after the funeral, I’d kept hoping. Right up until I left home, I’d kept hoping.

I hated not being able to tell Chelle her sister would be coming home safe and sound, because like my mom, she wouldn’t be. Dani was dead. I didn’t feel like I could handle that right now, and I barely knew her. How was Chelle supposed to deal with the heartbreaking news?

“Have you called Mandy?” I asked, desperate for something to say, anything at all to keep from thinking.

“She’s with Beth. They should be here soon.”

We sat in silence for a minute before the doorbell rang.

Relief poured through me, causing my knees to sag a little. I headed toward the door with a murmured “excuse me” to Chelle.

She didn’t even look up.

I hurried to the door as quickly as possible then pulled it open.

I didn’t know the older man waiting on the other side. So far as I knew, he wasn’t one of the four people I’d expected. He was tall and wiry with graying hair and a kind, compassionate face. I blinked up at him, trying to get my mind in order enough to ask his name.

“You must be Arionna,” he said, distracted. “I’m Thomas Edwards. Your dad called me from the car. Is she still here?” He came into the house and looked around, his eyes as worried as Dad’s had been when he’d left.

“Oh, um … ” I’d forgotten about our dinner plans. I figured I could be forgiven the oversight. I closed the door behind him and turned into the house. “She’s in the kitchen.”

”Is Beth here yet?” He pulled off his tweed jacket then laid it over the banister.

“Not yet,” I said. My hands were shaking. “She’s on her way. With Mandy.”

He looked relieved. “That’s good. Mandy should be here, too. They’re very close.”

“Yeah … ” I nodded. “Dace Matthews and Gage Carter are on their way as well.”

“Good, good,” he said as if unsurprised to learn they were coming too. “Good guys to have around for something like this.” He frowned, turning to look at me fully. “You, um, do you … ?”

I felt sorry for him, struggling along so awkwardly.

“Know it’s Dani they found?” I nodded, the lump in my throat growing. “Dace told me.”

“Oh.” The uncertainty in his eyes cleared slightly. “Dace. Of course. He would know. You haven’t … ?”

“I thought it best to wait.”

“Good, good,” he said again. “My wife is trying to reach Brett and Julie. Poor folks are going to be devastated.” He clucked his tongue, shaking his head. “Dani was an amazing young lady. Such a ray of light. Her sisters … it’s a real damn shame.”

“Yeah,” I said. I had no clue what else to say. I stood there for a minute, ill at ease. Not because of him and the way he fumbled about, but because the entire situation sucked. “Do you want to go in and wait with her?”

“Um … .” He glanced around, clearly torn.

The doorbell saved him from having to make a decision. I turned around to answer the door, only to find Dace already pushing his way inside, a beanie cap pulled low over his ears. His gaze sought mine as soon as he stepped over the threshold. He scrutinized my face, tension visibly draining from his shoulders.

Some of mine eased, too.

“Are Beth and Mandy here yet?” he asked.

I shook my head, not trusting myself to speak to him yet. I wouldn’t be able to keep standing there if I did try to talk. I’d fly into his arms and fall apart, and Chelle didn’t need to find out that way.

Dace closed his eyes as if in prayer, and then opened them and turned to Professor Edwards. “You know?”

Professor Edwards nodded, frowning. “I heard on my way over. Awful.”

Dace stepped up beside me, not touching but providing me strength and comfort anyway.
Are you okay?
His voice sounded in my head, calm and gentle.

I looked at him and shrugged slightly. I wanted him to put his arms around me and tell me this wasn’t happening.

His wolf rumbled as if in support of that plan.

Dace smiled crookedly, trying to be brave for me, I think. His smile didn’t reflect in his eyes. “Will you sit with Chelle until the others get here?”
I need to talk to Edwards,
he added on our private link.

About this?

He hesitated, but I couldn’t get a read on what he thought. He’d blocked me out somehow. I still felt him in my head, but I couldn’t hear his thoughts anymore.

Yes. Please?

“Of course,” I said aloud, not looking at him, but speaking to him. “She shouldn’t be alone anyway.”
You’ll tell me later?

Do I have a choice?

I did look at him then. I didn’t shake my head or say anything. I simply looked at him, knowing his answer was evident in my eyes, and in my thoughts.

He sighed internally.
Yes. I’ll tell you later.

I nodded to Professor Edwards, then headed back to the kitchen to wait with Chelle, my nerves clamoring for a million new reasons.

Chapter Twelve

C
helle stared into her glass of tea as if the ice slowly melting away inside held the answers she sought. Little ripples of heartbreak waved through the room until every surface in the kitchen seemed covered in a palpable film of sorrow.

Hovering in the doorway, I realized she already knew the truth. She knew Dani was not coming home this time. She waited only for someone to say the words so she could start grieving. I hated myself for not being brave enough to give her that release. I wanted to take her trembling hand in mine and tell her Dani was gone, but I couldn’t.

I stood there trying to work up the nerve to tell her what she already knew when the doorbell rang for the third time. I jumped at the sound and then cursed myself for being an idiot. I couldn’t help the soft sigh of relief that escaped either. I wouldn’t have to tell Chelle after all.

Within seconds, a ray of light made his way into the kitchen. I’d never seen him before, but I knew it could only be her boyfriend, Gage. He was as unmistakable as Dace, and in a completely different way. No matter where I saw Dace, he had an aura of power surrounding him. I’d sensed it all the way across the quad on that first day and hadn’t stopping noticing it since. Gage had an aura of his own, shining as bright as midday.

Looking at him, I could believe he was kindness and compassion and all that was right in the world. Gentleness poured from him in waves, and I understood instantly why Dace had wanted to make sure Chelle didn’t find out about Dani until he arrived.
If anyone can help her through this, it’s him,
I thought.