Exile of Lucifer (5 page)

34           CHRONICLES of the Host: Exile          of Lucifer
created each of us. Though why They have need of some of us I
don't understand," he added, looking at Tinius in good humor. The
group joined in at Tinius' expense.
"These three have created a perfect world," Lucifer continued.
"I mean, have you ever really explored this Kingdom? It is aston-
ishingly beautiful. Nothing has been left to chance. Everything is in
order and designed to perfection. Everything."
Lucifer walked over to the large window and made a dramat-
ic gesture indicating the panorama of the Kingdom outside. "A per-
fect world," he said, gazing out the window, the Great Temple's
golden dome brilliantly shining in the distance. He walked back to
the table and sat down.
"Now it follows that if one creates a world, one would desire
to populate it with subjects, does it not? I mean, the Three-in-One
cannot rule each other, can They? Though it might be interesting to
see them try," he added. Some of the angels laughed.
Sangius, a worship angel whose ministry at the Holy Flame
kept him near the Lord spoke up nervously. "This conversation
seems quite disrespectful!" A few of the angels looked at him coldly.
"Please, Sangius, hear me out. I mean no disrespect. Our gra-
cious Sovereign takes no offense at such conversation. It is too far
beneath Him to concern Himself with our little scholarly episodes.
Besides, I hear He has a marvelous sense of humor."
Sangius assented and Lucifer went on.
"As I was saying, with the creation of such a perfect world,
there would be a desire to create those who would inhabit such a
world. We have always been taught that so great is the love of our
Lord, that He wanted to share that love with others beside Himself.
And thus was sparked in the mind of God the angelic Host, that is,
you and I. And we were not to be just a mob of angels, but angels
of different assignment and distinct inclination; some given to wor-
ship, others given to war, some given to wisdom. But all given to
serve God and carry through with His vision and plans for this or
any other kingdom He may establish.
"Now that raises an interesting problem. I mean, having creat-
ed such a place of perfection, He must now populate this perfection

"Would a perfect God allow His creatures to turn on Him?"     35
with imperfect creatures such as you and I. To my thinking this
spoils the whole work of perfection. Why must this be?"
"Because the Lord in His wisdom willed it so," said Sangius.
Lucifer arose and walked over to an ornate vase filled with
lilacs, ignoring Sangius' comment. The angels watched him curi-
ously. "Consider this lovely flower," he said, taking one in his fin-
gers. "Stunningly beautiful and fragrant to the smell, and yet it has
no other function than to be exactly that." He sniffed the flower and
laid it on the table in front of Sangius. He then knocked loudly on
the table, startling some of the angels. "And this table and these
chairs will never serve any other function than what they were
designed for and for what we are now using them."
Lucifer moved over to an ornate cabinet and opened one of
the drawers, pulling out a scroll similar to the one Serus had car-
ried earlier. "And this music of mine. What is it except that which I
must write because it was for such things I was created?" He dra-
matically threw the scroll across the room, sending it rolling across
the floor.
"You, Tinius!" Lucifer said, pointing at the perplexed angel.
"Could you be anything other than a worshiping angel? Look at
you, Rugio! You're a warrior and nothing else." He paused for a
moment and continued. "Friends, we are what we are because God
has decreed it so. It has been taught to us from the beginning. No
other reason!"
"And so it should be," said Sangius. "The Lord is all-wise. His
will be done!"
"Yes, His will be done! Of course!" said Lucifer. "I am not
questioning the Lord's will in any matter, Sangius. I simply wonder
if you or I or..." Lucifer stopped and looked poignantly over the
group. "I am sorry, dear friends. I am afraid I have brought you into
my rather confusing dilemma and I have no right to impose
such...uncomfortable thoughts on any of you. Serus, bring in some
refreshments for us. I think it's time we closed this discussion--for
the time being."
Rugio stood up. "No! Tell us what is on your heart, Lucifer.
We agreed that you may talk freely here," he said, looking pointedly

36           CHRONICLES of the Host: Exile           of Lucifer
at Sangius, who, sensing the cold stares in the room, swallowed
uncomfortably. "Am I not right?" he asked the council, who joined
in affirmation with him.
Lucifer continued. "Very well, dear ones, but keep in mind
that these are only meditations and not necessarily the truth. It
would take an angel far wiser than I to find meaning in all of this.
Far wiser."
From the other end of the table as if on cue, an angel stood up
to speak. Everyone turned heir heads to Pellecus, a highly respect-
ed angel of wisdom who was a former associate of Crispin's and
deemed the wisest member of the Council. Pellecus was a gifted
orator who held angels spellbound when he taught at the Academy.
"The Lord expects us to wrestle with these deep matters," said
Pellecus. "It is a grievous insult to Him when we simply accept
things with no debate...no reason. I myself have studied these
things and am very interested in what you are saying. In truth,
Lucifer, many angels have deliberated such points. Please continue.
And remember that a healthy discourse is always preferable to no
discourse."
"So be it," said Lucifer dramatically, "but please, wise Pelle-
cus, guide me through these rather murky waters if you find me
drifting."
"Of course," said Pellecus, whose scholarship validated in the
minds of everyone the issues that were being discussed. If the
learned Pellecus deemed something worth discussing it must truly
have merit.
"We believe that we have been given a great freedom in this
Kingdom to come and go as we please," Lucifer continued. "But are
we really as free as we think? I return to music as an example.
Again I put it before you that I must perform as I was created to
perform. Therefore I am not free but a slave to my creaturehood.
Are we not therefore all slaves? Slaves to serve, I grant you, and to
serve a magnificent God. Understand I would not have it any other
way. I truly love my station and am bound to my ministry. But am
I bound to it because I love it...or must I love it because I am bound
to it? Where is truth in all of this?"

"Would a perfect God allow His creatures to turn on Him?"      37
Having recovered from the earlier rebuffs, Sangius sum-
moned the courage to speak up once more. "I propose we stop talk-
ing about this immediately. It is an affront to the Most High."
"Dear Sangius," said Lucifer. "How like you to defend the
Lord's honor as if it needed defending. But then as Minister of the
Flame you were created to passionately uphold Him, were you not?
I would not expect otherwise from you."
Sangius folded his arms and sighed.
Lucifer cast a pensive look over the heads of the group. "The
truth is that as long as you and I accept our places as they are,
rather than as they might be, we will never be anything more than
what the Lord intends for us to be. Perhaps we are slaves to our
instincts, nothing more, nothing less."
"But we are not slaves!" said Tinius. "We are free to choose
our course at anytime. We have always understood that. The serv-
ice I render to the Lord is out of love and desire to obey Him. He
created me wise and so I serve Him as a scribe. But not as a slave...I
have chosen to serve Him just as I could choose not to serve Him."
Tinius suddenly looked very uncomfortable. "I mean I would never
choose such a thing..." He looked down at the table, and stopped
talking. His eyes scanned the faces looking at him. "What angel
would dare to choose his own course?"
Everyone looked at Tinius, and then back to Lucifer to see
what his response would be. Lucifer began to slowly circle the
table, deep in thought. Staring directly at Tinius as he paced,
Lucifer repeated the words under his breath over and over, as if
digesting the thought for the very first time, "Free to choose...free
to choose."
Tinius started to speak again but Lucifer held up his hand to
stop him as if an interruption of this revelation would be devastat-
ing. He placed his hand on Tinius' shoulder in a gesture of comfort,
and then sat back down in his chair. Suddenly he said, "Could this
be? It's so very simple...yet so very profound! Tinius, you are
incredibly wise!"
"Me? Wise?" asked Tinius, timidly pointing to himself and
breaking the tension of the room as the group exploded in laughter.

38           CHRONICLES of the Host: Exile           of Lucifer
"Yes, my humble brother. If I follow your thinking, and please
help me out, I believe that what you are telling us is this: Either we
are everything that we will ever be according to the Lord's will at
the time of our creation and therefore we go on about our ministry,
knowing that there can be no deviation. Or we are free to choose
our course at anytime, as you so brilliantly put it, and actually
depart from the Lord's intentions for us and thus create our own
destinies. Now let's assume you are correct, Tinius, in your second
assertion--that while all of us have the desire to serve the Most
High, we actually might choose different courses. For example,
perhaps Prian would like to be a singer..."
"The Lord forbid that one," said Rugio. Everyone laughed as
Prian, a hulking warrior angel who served under Rugio, grinned.
"But that's just my point," continued Lucifer as the laughter
subsided. "Why would the Lord forbid such a thing? Are we a
threat to Him? Is everything so carefully managed that there can be
no variation?"
"But the Most High has already built variation into all
things," responded a frustrated Sangius. "That is precisely why
there are angels who minister in different ways. Can you imagine if
every angel decided that he would follow his own course? It would
be chaos!"
"Exactly!" said Lucifer. "And what is it that keeps Heaven
from becoming a place of chaos? The fact that angels choose to con-
tinue serving the Lord according to His dictates. Yes, we have been
taught that we have freedom to choose to serve the Lord. But that
teaching was always on the assumption that we would in fact
choose to do so. It's really an ingenious way of keeping the Host
under His control, isn't it? I mean all we've ever known is that it is
glorious to serve the Most High. Who would ever think of not serv-
ing Him? Yet, how do we know that glory cannot be found down
other paths as well? Who better knows us than ourselves?"
Tinius jumped in. "I don't think that's exactly what I was try-
ing to..."
"Isn't that how you perceive it, Pellecus?" asked Lucifer.

"Would a perfect God allow His creatures to turn on Him?"     39
Pellecus looked around the table at the angels, many of whom
were former students. All eyes were upon the revered angel, who
began speaking. "I have in the past debated some of these very
issues with others at the Academy, particularly Crispin. They too
were highly disturbed at the thought that any angel could or would
choose to differ with the Lord in anything. Mind you, I never
encouraged that such a thing should happen, only that such a thing
could happen if an angel willed it so.
"Now why is such a notion so disturbing to us? So disturbing
in fact that it has cost me my fellowship with most of the other wis-
dom angels and my seat at the Academy. I don't even remember
when I last spoke with Crispin. I'll tell you why." He pointed his
finger at the group. "Because knowledge is dangerous. Because
realization paves the way for new thinking. That is why the Lord is
Almighty--He possesses the greatest knowledge and whoever has
the greatest knowledge will always be greatest. How has He creat-
ed this marvelous Kingdom? By knowledge! How does He main-
tain it? By knowledge!
"Dear ones, the danger to the Lord's order is not in thinking
about being contrary to His purposes, but in acting contrary to His
purposes. That was the point I could never get across to Crispin
and those other narrow-minded scholars at the Academy. They
were so bent upon thinking properly that they forgot how to think
at all."
"And what was your final conclusion on the matter?" asked
Lucifer, who was now seated with the others, listening to Pellecus.
Pellecus thought about his answer for a moment or two, and
then began. "Lucifer, I believe you are essentially correct when you
say it is the angels who by their choice to serve the Lord are not
allowing chaos. Everything we have ever known points to the truth
that the Most High is the Creator of order and design and purpose.
In other words, if by choosing not to serve would result in disorder,
then by choosing to serve we angels are actually creating order,
design and purpose."
"Which would indicate..." prompted Lucifer.

40           CHRONICLES of the Host: Exile          of Lucifer
"Well, it would follow that if the Lord cannot sustain order
without the choosing of His creation to act in such a way as to sus-
tain that order, that the Most High is in reality not all-powerful as
we have always thought. Very powerful, indeed. But all-powerful?
All-knowing? Ever present? The fact that we have free wills just as
He does, indicates that we are far closer to Him than we've ever
realized."
He stood up dramatically, all eyes upon him. "Do you think a
truly perfect God would allow His creatures to have the ability to
turn on Him? Is that wisdom? Do you believe for one moment that
if the Most High was all-knowing that He would tolerate our dis-
cussion here and now?"
The room fell completely silent as everyone reacted different-
ly to the somber discussion: Some looked around, certain that they
were being spied upon by Michael's angels and were about to be
set upon; others tried to digest what was being said, not knowing
how to react; others simply nodded in stupefied agreement.
"And," Lucifer went on, almost whispering from the other
end of the table, "if God is not all-powerful, all-wise, all-knowing,
all-everything, then how can He possibly be perfect? And if He is
imperfect, by what authority does He rule over us who are also
imperfect? Pellecus?"
Everyone turned back to Pellecus for some sense of security,
or confirmation, or even a rebuttal to such a daring statement. Pel-
lecus was a little uncomfortable now but went on, "Disturbing
thoughts perhaps, but on the whole true."
The room teemed with the tension that comes with stumbling
onto something which is better left undiscovered; a feeling of tres-
pass...of crossing a line...of seeing what one should never see, and
yet having seen, of wanting to see more...of profaning that which is
sacred.
"There is always a feeling of disturbance when one confronts
the edges of truth," said Lucifer, breaking the spell. He had decid-
ed to conclude the meeting. "Thank you, dear Pellecus, for that
wonderful summation. Thank you all. My hope is that by exploring
such concerns as these we will be all the more loyal to the Most