Ever Enough (4 page)

My eyes popped open and I stared into the face of Kyler Lewis. I’d known him for as long as I’d known Finley. He was Finn’s best friend and—if it were possible—the two of them had been even more inseparable than Harper and I. He looked exactly the same. I hadn’t seen him for so long, yet he was one of the best looking men I’d ever seen; but not
the
best looking. Standing tall at six foot two, he had longer brown hair that was perpetually messy but I knew he styled it to be that way. He’d clearly bulked up and even I could see the definition in his arms from where I was standing. Kyler had the most gorgeous chocolate brown eyes I’d ever seen. My heart kicked into overdrive. If Kyler was here, Finley was definitely not too far away.

“What the fuck, rat bastard?!” I didn’t see your name on the list for the class reunion. What the hell are you doing here?” Harper asked looking Ky up and down with equal amounts of irritation and something else I couldn’t put my finger on.

“Well Finn and I didn’t see the email until earlier today and we thought it would be a good time to take a last minute trip to see my parents. We missed the deadline to register but what were they going to do, turn us away at the door? No fucking way! We were the star football players. You know they’ll kiss our feet when we grace them with our presence.”

“You’re a cocky bastard.” Harper curled her lip at Kyler.

She looked down at me and recognized the look on my face, realizing that hearing Finn’s name was about to send me into a massive panic attack. “Oh shit,” she said clearing her throat, “is Finn here right now?”

“I’m pretty sure I just said
we
were the star football players that will be welcomed with open arms and dropping panties, so yes, he is here. He’s over by the bar getting us some beers.”

“Just fucking great! He has no business being here!” Harper started ranting.

“What do you mean he ‘has no business being here’? He did go to high school here didn’t he?”

Harper looked like she could spit nails she was so mad. “That’s not what I mean asshat. I
mean
he has no business being here after he up and left Emilyn high and dry on grad night.”

Kyler looked over at me but I’d been rendered speechless, so Harper spoke up instead. “Listen Kyler,” she lowered her voice. “You guys have no idea what she went through when he left. It wasn’t pretty and it took her a long time to get her life back together. Seeing Finn again could set her back.”

Ky looked somewhat confused, “I thought you were married Em?”

Still unable to speak Harper said, “She is.”

No.

No.

No.

This couldn’t be happening. My eyes darted around in an attempt to catch a glimpse of Finley. But it was no use, because I was too short to see around the wall of bodies. I started to feel dizzy from the shots and two Midori Sour’s I’d already had.

Oh.

My.

Fucking.

Hell.

I needed to get out of there, fast. Trying to spot the exit, Harper grabbed my hand and held me in place. She must have sensed that I was about to bolt.

I looked up and she was staring at me shaking her head back and forth, silently telling me ‘you’re not bailing’. God damn it, what was she doing? I felt like I couldn’t breathe and I needed to get out of there! Even if she didn’t let me leave, the least she could do was allow me the courtesy of going to the bathroom to collect myself. Kyler must have really looked at me then because he stepped up to me and grabbed my elbow, leaning down to my ear. “Hey Em, you okay? You’re as white as a ghost.”

I looked straight into his brown eyes and instantly he knew. He looked over to Harper and said, “I’m going to walk her to the bathroom. Do you mind standing here and waiting for Finn?” Harper looked concerned, but must have thought better than to insist on taking me herself. She held her hand straight up and gestured for him to go ahead. I sighed, knowing she was more than likely going to give Finn and earful when she found him, but not having the energy to care.

Kyler gently took my hand and led me back to the bathrooms. Surprisingly, there wasn’t a line for the ladies room and without a second thought Ky marched me inside and locked the door. I walked straight over to the sink and braced my hands on the counter with two hands and looked at myself in the mirror. I was pale and my eyes were huge like a scared animal. I wasn’t sure how long I watched myself taking deep breaths, but I know it was long enough to forget Kyler was in the room with me. I glanced over my shoulder through the mirror and saw he was leaning up against the door, watching me. He face held a look of concern and curiosity.

“What’s going on Emilyn?”

I shook my head and looked down in an attempt to avoid eye contact. I began washing my hands, since that’s what one did in the bathroom besides going pee, right? “I have no idea what you’re talking about. I just started to feel a little woozy from all the alcohol. I don’t drink much and I think it just hit me all of a sudden.”

“
Right
. You always were a shit liar. Now tell me what’s really going on.” He wasn’t going to back down.

“I told you. I was just overwhelmed, and it’s seriously hot out there.” How could I tell Finn’s best friend that I might not actually be over him after ten years? That sounded crazy. Especially since I was
married
! Jesus Emilyn, get it together. You’re fucking married!

“So the fact that Finn is out there and you’re in here having a ‘moment’ is completely coincidental?”

Damn. I started to get mad. Mad that I was that easy to read, and mad that after ten years he still knew me so well. Being that they were best friends, Kyler was around a lot when Finn and I were dating and we became pretty close. He was my male version of Harper. Only difference being that when Finn left, I stopped talking to Ky.

“You know what? I don’t owe you any explanations, so back the fuck off! Finn left me high and dry ten years ago when he took off. I haven’t heard from or seen him since then. I couldn’t care less if he is out there or back in California shacking up with some fake bimbo. I’m married now and I’ve moved on.” Jesus, why was I yelling at Kyler? That was it. I was never drinking again.

Ky held his hands up, palms outwards in surrender. “Okay honey. If that look on your face when his name is mentioned is you ‘moved on’ then fine. I believe you.” He studied me a few more long seconds and changed the subject. “It’s been a long time. You’re looking hot Shorty!” That was Kyler’s nickname for me from the time I met him my junior year in high school until… well, that awful day I didn’t want to remember right then.

I knew he was full of crap on both accounts, but it was just like Ky to change the subject to try and make me feel better. “It’s good to see you Ky. Looks like California is treating you well.” I smiled and reached up to give him a hug. He held me in a tight embrace—picking me off the floor and setting me back down. Stepping back, I got a good look at my surroundings. A bathroom in a bar wasn’t the best place to catch up on old times, so I decided I needed to get out of there. “Hey I think I need a drink. If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to head back to the bar. Can you let Harper know where I’m at?” He agreed. I side stepped him, unlocked the door and headed down the hall through the crowd. As I waited for the bartender’s attention, I noticed a good looking man standing next to me, quite clearly giving me the eye. I glanced up at him, and he smiled back at me. He held his hand out for me to shake, and so I placed my hand in his. He leant in towards me, “Hi, I’m Vance. You would be…?”

I leaned back and smiled at him and said “Emilyn. Nice to meet you Vance. Are you from around here?”

“No, I’m actually just here doing some business in Boise. I’m from Portland but staying with some friends here in town.”

“What kind of business are you in, Vance?”

Showing me a fantastic smile he said “Marketing. I’m working on some new ad slogans.”

“That sounds…” I waved my hand in the air making small circles with it while I looked for the right words, “…boring.”

He tipped his head back and let out a deep throaty laugh. “Yes, I suppose it can be boring but I honestly love it. I get to be creative and it’s quite the feeling when you see a commercial on TV that you had a hand in.”

I knew I’d blame it on the alcohol later, but I was feeling feisty and Vance was a very good looking man that was showing an interest in me—interest that I hadn’t felt from a man in a long time. I reached out and took hold of his hand and said with a devilish smile, “Want to dance with me?”

He returned my smile with one of his own, and winked at me before he led me out on the dance floor. As Vance brought me in close to his body, I didn’t want to think about my troubles with Weston. I didn’t want to look around for Harper, Kyler, or
him.
I just wanted to be lost in the moment and forget that the love of my life was here in this bar. Wait… what the hell? Love of my life? I must’ve been drunker than I thought.

Some sort of upbeat song was on and I put my hands up around Vance’s shoulders and brought my body close to his. He smelled good, like some sort of expensive cologne and good clean man. Vance slid his hands from my shoulder blades down low to rest on my hips. He pulled me closer; wedging our bodies so there was no space between them. He had his right leg in between mine and we rocked back and forth to the beat. I could feel his growing arousal against my hip, and I had to admit that it’d been a while since I had been this close to a man and felt somewhat desirable. Blend that with my inebriated state and it was a heady mix. As one song blended into the next, I was lost. It was exactly what I wanted. They all seem to leave me, it was just a matter of time. So for right now I just wanted to feel
this
; a hard bodied man holding me close; the smell, the sensation, the need.

Just as I let the last of my reservations go I felt those familiar eyes on me. I didn’t need to turn around to know those piercing blue eyes were staring at me. My stomach bottomed out, and my heart rate spiked into overdrive. I shifted around in Vance’s arms and put my back to his front, reaching my arms up around his neck as his hands moved up to hold on to my stomach. I wasn’t feeling brave enough to open my eyes and see
him
yet so I continued to sway my hips against Vance. I felt his left hand move from my stomach and slide down my hip to my thigh and back up to my hip. Jesus, was it hot in here? I felt my body flash with heat, and I was pretty sure it had nothing to do with the temperature.

I heard someone clear their throat and I felt Vance stiffen at my back.

Fuck.

I felt like I was about to throw up. Opening my eyes, I was met with a wide muscular chest, wearing a grey button down shirt with a white undershirt. The button down was unbuttoned and sexy as hell. The sleeves were rolled up to the elbows so I could see strong, muscular forearms and the few tattoos that snaked down to the wrist. Still not able to make eye contact, I let my eyes roam further, down to a pair of khaki cargo shorts and naked feet in a pair of dark brown flip flops. He cleared his throat again, and that’s when my eyes came back up his body and finally rested on his face. Holy shit. He was exactly the same, and yet so very different. He’d clearly grown since high school. He was around six feet when I was dating him, but now looked to be around
six foot four. He was huge! He’d let his hair grow out to a sexy dark brown mess that was swept to the side. His jaw was strong and square with perfectly full lips. But his eyes…

Oh my god his eyes.

I couldn’t tear myself away from them. He’d always had the most hypnotic pair of eyes I’d ever seen. They were a dark blue that appeared lighter because of how dark his hair was. His perfect full lips tipped up a little bit before becoming a full blown smile. His teeth were super white and perfectly straight. The man was just… beautiful.

“Hello Emilyn,” he said in his ultra sexy deep voice. Either his voice had gone down a few octaves, or I hadn’t remembered it that well.

I still was standing there staring at him when I remembered Vance standing behind me. He shifted forward. “Do you know this guy Emilyn?”

The two of them must have been waiting for me to respond… shit! Wait, was I supposed to be talking? Did I speak already? Seriously, I was
never
drinking this much again! That’s when Finn reached out and touched my chin lightly with his right index finger and shut my jaw that was apparently hanging open. Oh god how embarrassing! He looked right at me like he could devour me. But he smiled at me like he knew what I was thinking. Bastard! My knees felt weak and I really wished he hadn’t touched me. How could this man affect me so much after ten years?

Since my vocabulary had clearly taken a vacation, Finn spoke up and said, “Yeah I know her. We went to high school together.” That snapped me out of my daze. “She’s married by the way.”

“Emilyn didn’t tell me she was married. She’s not wearing a ring. So if you’ll excuse us.” Vance said in a condescending tone dismissing Finn. He put himself in front of me, effectively blocking my view of Finn.

“I don’t think you get it my man. She’s taken, whether she’s wearing a ring or not. Now back away from her and go find another pretty woman to dance with.” I could hear the threat in Finn’s voice. I was getting pissed. Who did he think he was, coming and scaring off a guy I was just
dancing
with? I hadn’t seen him in such a long time and he thought he could just go scaring people away from me?