Ever After (24 page)

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Authors: Jude Deveraux

BOOK: Ever After
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Jamie ran after her on his crutches.

When Hallie got to the house she didn't go into the kitchen. For all she knew there might be people in there. Instead, she went around to the side and threw open the doors to the tea room. Thankfully, it was empty.

Jamie was right behind her. “I never meant to hide anything,” he said, his voice genuinely contrite. “I just wanted to be normal, that's all. My family treats me like I'm a delicate piece of glass that's about to shatter if they breathe too hard.”

She turned to him. “Normal? You think this situation is
normal
?! You're isolated with your own private physical therapist. I needed to know about your injuries, but you played a childish game of hide-and-seek. Tell me what's normal about that!”

Jamie hobbled over to be closer to her. “It's not the physical
therapist part that's the problem, it's just that you're so pretty, so desirable. From the moment I saw you I have been out of my mind with wanting you.” He was smiling at her so very sweetly.

“So now I'm supposed to fall into your arms?” Hallie said. “Is that what you think I'm going to do? You admit you're willing to jump into bed with me and I am supposed to instantly forgive you?”

“Well, I did think it would make a difference if you knew and I thought…” He could see that every word he spoke was making her even angrier. For a second he seemed to hear Dr. Huntley's laughter at him, saying he'd never been “on the receiving end of a woman's rage over a man's prevarications.” And it was true that he didn't know what to say or do to make her forgive him.

When he made a step toward her, she backed up. “Hallie, please let me explain,” he said. “I thought—” He broke off because his three cousins were outside the window behind Hallie. They were holding up pieces of paper with words on them. Adam's said “Apologize.” Ian had written “Grovel.” And Raine's paper said “Tell her you're wrong.”

“I'm sorry,” Jamie said. “I was wrong. I thought of myself and that's all.”

“Yes, you did!” Hallie said. “You were utterly selfish.”

He took another step toward her, but again she stepped back.

“I just wanted some time away from pity, that's all,” Jamie said and the words were from his heart.

“So you let me nearly go crazy wondering what was wrong with you? All because you thought I'd
pity
you?”

The men outside were nodding at this. “Yes, I did,” Jamie said, his head down.

“You had no respect for my profession.”

Outside, the men nodded in agreement.

“I'm really sorry and you are right. I didn't respect you or your expertise and I thought of no one but myself. It's just that—” He stopped when the men started vigorously shaking their heads no. Raine made the motion of zipping his mouth closed.

As Hallie looked at his nearly bare body, a tiny bit of anger left her. He still had on only the towel and the brace. Up close, the gashes and cuts were worse than they'd first appeared. “So what else is there? PTSD?”

“Yeah. I'm—” Jamie stopped talking.

“When the gate slams?”

“I go into a stance of defense,” he said.

Hallie nodded. “Your fear to leave the grounds?”

“Crowds, strangers, places I don't know, they all…” He took a breath. This wasn't easy for a man to admit. “They scare me.”

“What medications are you on?”

“For sleep, anxiety, depression.” He paused. “But Hallie, since I've been with you, I've tapered off. You've been the best thing that's happened to me. You—” When he stepped closer to her, this time she didn't back away.

“Wait a minute! You told Dr. Huntley, didn't you? You told a
stranger
what you were going through but not me. No, you let
me
try to figure it out. I'm here to help you, but you wouldn't even take off your shirt. You…” He was only a few feet from her and the thought of what he'd been through was beginning to sink in. Anger was being replaced with tears.

“Hallie, I'm sorry,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. “Really, I am. I just wanted you to see me as a whole man, not as damaged. I didn't want you to think of me as less than a man.”

Some of her anger returned, but it was different. “Do you have any idea how stupid that sounds? You're more of a man
than anyone I've ever met. You care about…about everyone. You're funny and smart and…I thought we were becoming friends. But you ran off with your brother and left me alone with your naked cousins.”

It was sinking in to Jamie that she wasn't going to feel sorry for him. Todd had talked him into staying away for a couple of days to give them both time to think. But Jamie had agonized over her meeting men who weren't damaged by war and life. And she had reduced them to “naked cousins.” He wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh or cry in joy.

He motioned for the guys to leave, then took a step toward her. “I did a stupid, selfish thing because I didn't know women like you existed. I assumed you were like everyone else and would be sickened at the sight of me.” His heart was in his words. His pride, his very manhood, was there. To admit his failings was almost as painful as the wounds on his body. “Hallie, I have problems, deep ones, and I honestly don't know how to handle them. I can't sleep well without pills. I—”

“You don't sleep very well
with
them,” Hallie said. “If it weren't for sleeping kisses, you would have fallen out of bed the first night I was here.”

Jamie's eyes widened. “Sleeping kisses?”

“At two
A.M.
every morning I'm at your bedside trying to get you settled. The only thing that works are kisses and hugs. And sometimes sleeping with you like I'm your favorite stuffed toy. You're like a toddler. Except for—” She couldn't keep up her bravado. Reaching out, she put her hand on his chest, on the ridges and dips of the scars. Some of them were burns. “I could have helped you,” she whispered.

“I know that now, but I didn't then.” He touched her earlobe. “You're so beautiful, but I'm so…so repulsive. My cousins are perfect and I'm—”

“More interesting!” Hallie said. “They
are
perfect. They haven't a mark on their flawless bodies, but you…You've
done something for other people and for your country. You…” She was fighting tears. “You're more of a man than they will
ever
be.”

When Jamie held his arms out to her, there were tears in his eyes and she went to him. For a moment he held her as he had before, as friends, and her mind was on what he'd been through.

But as they stood there, bodies entwined, Hallie became aware that at some point Jamie's towel had fallen off. And he was ready for her. She could feel the hardness of him through the thin fabric of her shorts. It looked like some parts of him weren't damaged!

When she pulled away, she meant to make a joke. But the look in his eyes erased all thoughts of humor. It had been a long time since she'd had a boyfriend and Jamie Taggert was a
very
desirable man.

For a moment his eyes searched hers and she knew that “yes” was written in them.

Bending his head, he kissed her, but only for a second. He drew back and looked at her in shock. “I remember!” he said. “I remember the taste of your kisses.”

She started to smile, but Jamie's passion took over. Within seconds, she was bare from the waist down and her shirt was open.

Never before had she experienced such desire, such energy and excitement. He moved her out of sight of the window, pressed her back against the wall, and pulled her leg up to his hip. She wrapped it around him.

He entered her with a force that she'd never felt before, and she gave a sigh. “Ooooooh.” It seemed that every part of Jamie's body was big.

“Did I hurt you?” He sounded alarmed.

“Oh, yeah,” she said, her head back against the wall, her eyes closed. “I might not survive.”

He gave a low chuckle. “Me neither.” He put his mouth on her neck.

Hard, deep thrusts sent chills of pleasure through her body. Desire—need—flooded her. He picked up her other leg so she was fully clasping his hips as he thrust into her again and again.

All thought, all sense of being a human, seemed to leave Hallie as she gave herself over to this man. Mind, body, soul became feelings, sensations.

With her upper back against the wall and her legs around him, she lifted her arms. The leverage made his thrusts even deeper.

When the end came, waves of pleasure and release went through her. She went from being a tower of strength to her body collapsing. If Jamie hadn't held on to her, she would have fallen, but his arms went around her and pulled her against his bare chest.

He took the few steps to the old couch and stretched out on it, his braced leg extended and touching the floor, with Hallie on top of him.

She still had on her bra and shirt but was nude from the waist down. As they lay there, his hand caressed her lower half, enjoying her curves.

As for Hallie, it took her a while to recover. She was floating in a delicious haze of sensations, and she couldn't seem to return to the world.

“All right?” he whispered.

“Yes.” His chest was so very warm. It wasn't smooth, but she could feel the strong contours of it. She ran her hand over his ribs and down to his side, over the thick scars there.

Very slowly, she remembered where she was—and who she was. She had just broken a rule of her profession about sleeping with a client.

She didn't want to, but she made herself get off his big, warm body and sit on the edge of the couch, her back still touching
him. There was a pillow on the floor and she pulled it onto her lap, then started to button her shirt—which was a useless endeavor as most of the buttons had been torn off. She saw one glistening on the floor by the wall where they'd just—She took a breath. There were things that had to be said and she dreaded his response.

“This can't happen again,” she said softly. “We aren't—”

“Going steady?” he said cheerfully.

She looked at him in surprise. In her experience, when you told men there wouldn't be any more—even if it was mutual—they got angry. But Jamie was smiling at her. He was stretched out on the couch, one big, muscular arm behind his head, and he had a little smile on his handsome face.

She couldn't help a bit of a frown. “You agree?”

“I understand,” he said. “You don't think there is any future for us, and I'm your patient. And besides, you have a guy from back home coming to visit any day. You don't want any complications.”

“Right,” she said. That was exactly what was in her mind, so why was it so very annoying when
he
said it?

“I have a question,” Jamie said. “Did you finagle me into moving into the upstairs bedroom so you wouldn't have to wander around in the dark? Because of my nightmares, that is?”

“That's right.”

“You made up the lie about being scared of the beautiful Tea Ladies just to save yourself the trek?”

Her frown left her and a smile began. “Yes, I did. I flat out told a going-to-hell lie, and my toes thank me for it. Actually, my whole body thanks me, since I spent the first night on the couch. I nearly froze!”

A look of such softness came to Jamie's face that she almost bent forward and kissed him.

“Thank you,” he said. “Hand me the towel, will you? Unless you want to have some more friendship sex.”

She knew what he meant, that he was ready again—and she didn't dare look or she just might climb back on top of him.

For a few moments their eyes locked and Hallie felt herself weaken. Even as she knew she shouldn't, she leaned toward him, her eyes beginning to close.

But abruptly, Jamie sat up, causing Hallie to nearly slide off the couch. His strong arm caught her as he moved out from behind her. She fell back against the couch and watched him walk across the room in all his naked glory. So there were a few indentations, she thought. Well, maybe more than a few, but they didn't take away from his beauty.

He wrapped the towel around his waist, then turned back to hand her her garments.

Hallie still hadn't moved. What just happened didn't seem to have affected him at all but it certainly had her. But then hadn't she always thought he was just a playboy who jetted around the world? Maybe he was used to this kind of thing. But today she'd found out he'd been a man who'd served his country and had nearly died from it. The two images didn't seem to go together. Who was the real Jamie Taggert?

“I'm going upstairs to put on some clothes,” he said. “I don't like the kids to see me like this. You still want to work on me on your table?”

“Yes, of course.”

“I'll meet you at the gym in an hour.”

Before Hallie could reply, he went through the door to the kitchen and closed it behind him.

After she was dressed, she looked about the empty tea room. What an understanding man Jamie was! she thought. They'd been caught up in the moment and had sex. It was, of course, understandable, born out of a combination of emotions. For one thing, she'd just discovered what he'd kept secret, then she'd seen the evidence of his severe injuries, and they'd had an argument. Anger always got the blood flowing, didn't it?

All in all, it made sense. Any two healthy young people, with him wearing only a towel—which had slipped to the floor, no less—would have done what they did. It was natural. If it had been Jamie's cousin Raine, it would probably have happened.

Even as she thought that, she knew it wasn't true. She'd wanted Jamie from the day she'd looked out a window and seen him.

So it had happened and now it was done with. And as Jamie had said, Braden was coming in a few days, then they would…Who knew?

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