Eve Langlais (11 page)

Exhausted but happy, Suzie held her two little bundles of love and beamed up at Damian, only to be taken aback by the possessive and cold look in his eyes.

“Aren’t they just perfect?” she’d said, nuzzling them one at a time.

“Yes, he is,” said Damian, scooping Jared up and crowing over him. Suzie, who held Jessica, looked at him in askance. Surely, he meant both babies? Right?

It soon became clear once they got home with their bundles of joy which one he cared about most.

Jared was Damian’s pride and joy. He held him and rocked him to sleep. Told him stories. Would have fed him, too, if he’d had boobs of his own, Suzie used to think nastily. Poor Jessica, he ignored. Damian had the son he’d always dreamed of, and he had no room in his heart or mind for his daughter.

Nor for Suzie.

Nope, she became his unpaid maid and nanny. He left her a list of chores to be done each day, all of them directed toward making him and Jared comfortable. Suzie, who slept alone in the room with the crib, cried herself almost nightly to sleep. She quickly learned he had no patience for tears—her first black eye taught her that. Meek as a mouse, submissive to his whims or face punishment—she almost wished she’d gone back to her mother and her strict household rules.

Where had his love for her gone? What had she done? She’d been so sure it had to be her—she must have done something to change his love for her. It never occurred to her at the time to place any of the blame on him. Desperate thoughts plagued her. Was it because she’d blossomed in weight? Her body never did regain its pre-pregnancy shape. Maybe she wasn’t interesting enough. Or maybe, said that damned little voice in her head, he’d never loved her at all. No, she couldn’t have been so wrong, so blind, so stupidly naïve . . .

When the twins were three months old, Damian started preparing for a trip.

“Where are we going?” she’d asked. Not that she really cared, but maybe if they went elsewhere the Damian she had fallen in love with would come back.

“Jared and I are going home.”

“What about Jessica and me?” she’d asked, her whining tone grating even to her ear.

“Frankly, my dear, you and Jessica can do whatever you like. I have no further use for either of you,” he’d said with disdain, the coldness in his eyes making her shiver.

Appalled, Suzie tried to talk to him. She cried, pleaded, trying to understand, but Damian slapped her and told her to shut up and stop her whining. She cowered and swallowed her tongue and watched as he continued with his plans. It began to dawn on her that this was the real Damian. Not the silver-tongued devil who had seduced her, but this cold, calculating man who treated her like the basest of creatures. He’d never loved her. She’d just been a means to an end.

As he continued his plans to take her son away, she realized no one was going to come to her rescue, and if she didn’t do something, he’d leave, disappear into the vast world, taking Jared with him. Finally, a spark of anger ignited. Fuck that, and fuck him! He’d lost his mind if he thought she’d let him take off with her precious baby boy. Damian obviously wasn’t the man she’d believed him to be, and bemoaning 41

her fate wouldn’t change it. He’d used her—impregnated her like some prize mare—and now planned to take off with his prize colt.

Over her dead fucking body.

Suzie, the anger finally clearing the blinders from her eyes, made plans of her own. She called a distant aunt who’d always been friendly to her growing up. Together they made plans for Suzie to come and stay for a while with the twins till she found a place of her own.

Suzie packed in secret. She bought second hand luggage and hid it in the storage locker that Damian never used. She began squirreling away the household money he left her.

Finally, the day arrived. Damian told her he’d be gone most of the day finalizing his plans for Jared and him to leave.

“The lease is paid till the end of the month. Stay or leave, I don’t care, but don’t expect any help from me for you and the girl child.”

He left her on those cold words, and as she watched his lanky form going up the street for the last time, she had to hold back an urge to scream what she really thought of him, although she thought it hard and venomously—Goddamn, lying son-of-a-bitch! But better than words were action.

Calling a cab company, she lugged her packed suitcases out of hiding, and with two used car seats she’d picked up at a garage sale, made her way to the train station. What a nightmare! Imagine being alone and trying to cart around not just one, but two three month old babies. Absolutely helpless in their innocence, wrapped in their carseats, a pitifully small pile of luggage beside them. Thank God for the ticket seller. Her kind eyes had taken one look at her, so young and helpless-looking, and had ordered one of the security guards to help her.

Heart pumping, she boarded the train with the most precious of cargoes, expecting at any minute that Damian would come flying out of nowhere to steal her little boy. She could see it so vividly in her mind—he’d swoop down upon her, an ominous black vulture with widespread arms, freezing her with the cold, grey iciness of his eyes. His long fingers, like claws, would rip Jared out of her arms, and he would laugh that cynical chuckle that hurt more than any words. A discordant, denigrating sound that had the ability to make her feel less than two inches tall.

But the train—surprise!—left without disruption, and she arrived at her aunt’s house safely. She spent that first week huddled in the house, peering through the drapes while her aunt looked on with soft, pitying eyes.

As the days, and then the weeks, passed, she gradually relaxed. He hadn’t followed them. Maybe she’d escaped. If only that little voice inside would stop saying, “What if. . .”

But she couldn’t live in fear forever. Life went on, and babies had needs. And so did Suzie. She bucked up and started living again. The first few months after she escaped were spent mostly caring for her two time-consuming babies. But that wasn’t all she did. She went back to school. Her aunt, a blessed saint of a woman, talked her into going to some classes and volunteered to watch the twins, whom she adored.

The months passed. The twins turned one and got their first taste of chocolate, a momentous event that Suzie had well documented with dozens of pictures. Suzie studied hard and got her credits to graduate and began doing freelance work at home creating small business Web sites. Life, she realized one day, was actually good. She’d stopped freezing every time she saw a tall, dark man when she went out, and she finally realized she felt happy again.

Suzie and her aunt got on famously. Widowed and childless, she’d taken Suzie and the twins in and treated them better than her own mother ever had. When she died in a random street accident, Suzie cried for days. It didn’t help that her mother showed up for the funeral—although Suzie had quite enjoyed the look on her face when she’d seen Suzie and her out-of-wedlock grandchildren. The “I knew you’d turn out to be a whore” was a bit of a slap in the face, though, that Suzie could have done without.

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The only good thing that came out of that tragedy was money. Suzie’s aunt had some money put away, and she left all of it to Suzie and the twins. Not trusting her mother, and unable to live with the memories in the house, Suzie sold her aunt’s home and moved, and moved again. Each time further and further east. For some reason, she had a feeling, almost like she knew that one day Damian would come back. Something in his eyes, his look, his voice, told her that he would never let them go.

But now, the time had come to stop running. Hunter was right. She needed to stand her ground.

She’d grown up over the last couple of years, become wiser, and after all, Damian was just a man. There were laws that would protect her and the children.

Speaking of which, her little Tasmanian devils came flying into her room and dove onto her bed.

Suzie pushed away the painful memories of her past and set herself to the task of tickling her sweet angels breathless.

Damian might have been a conniving, cold bastard, but he’d sure created sweet kids.

* * * *

One messy pancake breakfast later, Suzie decided to attempt her first lawn mowing. The previous owner had left the gas mower behind, so with an avid audience of two, she wheeled the rusty, red machine out from the garage and into the backyard. She’d done her research on the net on how to work one of these suckers and felt pretty confident she could handle this new household chore. She grabbed the pull cord and yanked while holding the gas handle. The engine made a whirring sound that immediately stopped.

The twins giggled from the back deck.

“Hey, you two!” Suzie mock growled at them. “No laughing in the peanut gallery.” The twins giggled louder.

Suzie bent over the mower again and pulled hard. Again, a little whir, then nothing. Stupid thing!

She grabbed the cord and yanked it really hard and fast. Too hard! She lost her balance and fell flat on her butt to the howls of her children. A shadow covered her, and she looked up to see Hunter shaking his head at her.

“Need a hand?” he said, offering her one to help her stand up.

“Stupid mower won’t start!” she said, glaring at the offensive red machine.

Hunter winked at the kids and said, “Watch this!” With one fast and fluid pull, he yanked the cord, and the mower started with a rumble.

Suzie stood there, fuming.
Show off.

Hunter grinned at her and then started to mow the lawn. Suzie opened her mouth to protest, but shut it when her new lawn boy pulled off his shirt and tossed it on the deck beside the kids.

Talk about hot! His muscled upper body looked golden in the morning light, his skin smooth and begging for a hand to stroke it. Suddenly, Suzie remembered in vivid detail the evening’s previous kiss.

That searing, panty-wetting kiss. A tingling started in her groin and moved up her body, and as she watched, she wondered what it would feel like to be kissed by Hunter shirtless, skin-to-skin, her breasts rubbing against his hot bod, her hands. . .

She must have been drooling or something because Jessica asked, “Mommy, why you loo so funny?”

Crap, caught by my kids lusting after the lawn boy. Dammit!
Needing some distraction, Suzie went inside and made up a pitcher of Kool-Aid. What she really needed was a really cold shower, but she settled for sucking on an ice cube, trying to not think of how it would feel if she rubbed that cold piece of ice across Hunter’s skin, licking up the water after it.

A while later, after she’d pinched herself hard a few times to get her libido under control, she came out with the frosty glasses and pitcher. She stopped in the middle of the deck and smiled, both amused and touched to see that Jared was helping Hunter mow the lawn.
Aw, how cute!

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Hunter had Jared holding the crossbar while he held the handle and actually pushed the mower.

Jared beamed at her. “Loo, mommy, I mow da grath.”

“Good job, big boy,” she praised him.
God, is there anything Hunter does that isn’t cute and heart melting?

Jessica watched them avidly, or should she say, watched Hunter with hero worship again. Turned out everybody in the family liked Hunter.

Suzie poured a tall glass of Kool-Aid and handed it to her daughter. “Here, baby, why don’t you take Hunter a drink?” Jessica took the glass in her two hands, and with a careful walk that only spilled a little juice, carried it to Hunter, who stopped the mower when he saw her coming.

“Thank you, precious,” he said with a smile, taking the glass from her. Jessica beamed at him.

Suzie poured out more Kool-Aid in two plastic cups for the kids who came tearing at her when they saw them.

How domestic! Suzie again felt that pang, seeing how life would be with a husband around. Father mowing the lawn, teaching his son. Daughter hanging out while Mom’s in the kitchen cooking.

Everyone happy. Sigh. Reality could be such a bitch.

Hunter came striding over the freshly mown lawn, his tight abs glistening with sweat. Yes, she could definitely wake up to that bod every day! And go to sleep with it and lick it and . . . all kinds of nasty things that would appall even Mrs. Robinson.

“Thanks,” he said, tipping the glass, his throat working as he swallowed the last of the juice.
Betcha he
tastes nice and sweet right about now
, thought Suzie lustfully, watching his tongue lick the last drop from his bottom lip.

The kids, high on sugar, raced around the yard chasing each other. Hunter watched them, smiling, then turned to her, his eyes smoky.

“I was thinking,” he said. “Um, you know how I told you last night we were friends.”

Suzie nodded.
Oh-oh, is this where he tells me he doesn’t think it’s a good idea?
That would suck. She’d gotten kind of used to having him around.

“And you said you were thinking of dating. Well, I was thinking that most relationships start out as friendships and . . .” Suzie started to feel hope and wanted to shake him to hurry up and spit it out.

“I think we should go on a date,” he said nervously.

“Yes.” No hesitation. She wanted to date Hunter.
I know he’s all wrong for me and I shouldn’t, but I want
to be with him.
Now she sounded like Jessica—
Mine!

“Really?” He looked relieved, like he’d been unsure of her answer. “Great! Um, so where would you like to go?”

“Well, first I need to figure out what to do with the kids. I don’t really know anybody around here yet, and I don’t let strangers mind my kids.”

“Oh, I think I can finagle something there,” he said with a grin. “My mother’s been dying to visit. I was thinking of telling her to come out. Knowing her, she’d be more than happy to mind the twins so we could go on a date.”

His mother! Talk about getting serious real quick. Maybe too quick.

He must have seen her uncertainty, but misconstrued its cause. “It’s okay. Mother’s great with children.”

“Oh, I’m sure she is. Are you sure about dating and stuff, though?” she asked. “I’m not into casual affairs. I can’t, not with the kids to think about.”