Epilogue: The Dark Duet (23 page)

“Good point. Now, kind sir, my present
please.” She held out both hands. I lifted her off my lap and we walked
upstairs.

I’m going to interject now and tell you
upfront that I won’t be sharing the details of my gift to Livvie. Don’t pout!
It’s simply too embarrassing to rehash. However, as I don’t want to read the
incessant questions about it on the internet, I’ll tell you this: It involved
recreating another of Livvie’s memories… of me… alone… in the shower. Make your
own panties wet! I’m moving on to the next chapter.

I was dreaming. I hate it when I dream,
but for the first time in recent memory… it was good. I was having the kind of
dream a person doesn’t wish to wake up from. Rafiq was there, but it wasn’t
really him. It was a version of him I’d never know and that he could never be. His
presence made it obvious I was dreaming, but his company added something and I
chose to go along.

Livvie and I were having a party. We
were celebrating my birthday. There were lots of people I didn’t recognize, but
Livvie seemed to know them. I think one of them was her mother. They were in
the kitchen together, pouring champagne into long flutes.
One of Livvie’s sisters was trying to convince them
she could have a glass. She looked the way I imagine Livvie looked as a child.
Livvie looked
so happy.

“You’ve done well,
Khoya.
I’m proud of you. You deserve this,” Rafiq said. He clapped
me on the back and ruffled my hair the way he used to when I was a boy. I
swatted his hand away.

“I’m not a child. Stop doing that.” I
couldn’t stop smiling.

“I know. You’re a man now. You have a
family of your own. Perhaps I am only reminiscing over the boy I knew.” He
ruffled my hair again and I didn’t mind.

“I’m glad you could come. I don’t have
any other family.”

“We’re orphans, Caleb. We make our own
families.”

I laughed.

“Yes, I remember.”

“And the rest? Do you remember that as
well?” Sadness had crept into his voice.

“I forgave you. It’s all led me here.”
I looked toward Livvie and her mother. They waved at me and I raised a hand to
acknowledge them.

“Who’s this guy? He looks rather
interesting and scary.” Claudia bumped into my side and nearly pushed me into
Rafiq.

“Do you always have to be so forceful?”

“I don’t like it when I’m not the
center of attention.” She winked.

“It’s
my
birthday!” I chided. Claudia shrugged.

I introduced Claudia to Rafiq and made
a hasty exit. She was already asking him intimate questions about his role in
my life. Rafiq looked like he’d smelled something foul and I laughed. He
deserved it.

As I walked into the main living room,
Rubio was working on connecting the PlayStation. He turned toward me when I
came in.

“Give me a hand, James? I can’t seem to
do anything in these ridiculously skinny pants.” Rubio is a quiet guy. My head
couldn’t create inventive dialogue for him.

I couldn’t quite put the PlayStation together
either.

“I’m dreaming, Rubio. I can’t put this
shit together. Hold on.” I kicked the PlayStation and all the cables were
magically connected.

“Nice! Someday, when Claudia stops
coddling me like an infant, I hope you can teach me how to be more of a man,”
Rubio said (it’s my dream—stop judging me).

“You can start by taking care of this.”
I took out a pair of scissors from my pocket and cut the large hank of hair
covering most of his face. There was a large round of applause.

“Okay everyone, it’s time to sing
Happy Birthday
!” The crowd parted for
Livvie as she walked out of the kitchen holding a large chocolate cake covered
in candles.

Happy
birthday to you.

Happy
birthday to you.

Happy
birthday dear, James.

Happy
birthday to you.

I scrunched my face. When had I learned
that song?

Wake
up, Birthday Boy. It’s time for one of your presents.

Something soft touched my face.

Wake
up, Sexy. It’s your birthday.

I smiled both inside and outside the
dream.
Livvie.
She was real. She was
with me. She was mine. If the dream had been good—and it had been—waking up had
been even better.

I opened my eyes slowly. Reality and
fantasy rearranged themselves in my mind until everything was clear. I smiled
when I saw Livvie standing by the side of the bed. She raised her arm and
tickled my face with a long feather. I rubbed my nose.

“That’s not what that’s for,” I said.
My voice was rough. I yawned and stretched.

“Want me to tickle your penis?” She
flicked the feather over the tent in the sheets.

I put my hand over my erection and
turned away.

“No. That’s not for you. I have to go
to the bathroom.”

“Well get up! I have a whole day of
birthday activities planned and you’re spoiling my fun with your sleeping… and
your pee boner.”

I laughed.

“I hate when you call it that.”

“Yeah? Well I hate that I can’t play
with it. Why the hell is it so hard if I’m not supposed to play with it? That’s
false advertising, Mister.”

I flopped onto my back and threw my
arms across my eyes.

“Fine. Ravage me. But don’t expect to
go anywhere for a while.” The last time she mounted my morning erection I
couldn’t come for over an hour. Livvie had to take a nap when we finished and
the whole morning had been appropriated.

“Le sigh. It’s going to have to wait.
We have plans. Now,
get up
!” Livvie
put her hands on my stomach and bounced me up and down.

“Stop!” I
really
had to piss. I grabbed Livvie around her waist and pulled
her into the bed with me. She squealed as I tickled her. “I’m going to do this
until you pee!” Her legs were kicking, but I threw the comforter over them
until she was trapped.

“Oh, god! Oh, please. Please stop!” She
was laughing despite the panic I could see in her eyes.

“Are you sorry?” I teased.

“Yes! Please!” Livvie was panting by
the time I stopped tickling her. She smiled up at me.

“Can I kiss you?” I asked.

“You haven’t brushed your teeth.” She
wrinkled her nose.

“I know. That’s why I asked.” I was
already leaning down toward her mouth. I kept it brief. I hopped off of her
quickly and made my way into the bathroom before she could try to retaliate.

There was a knock on the door.

“Meet me downstairs when you’re done. I
made breakfast.”

“Okay,” I said.

Once I was done using the bathroom, I
washed my hands and brushed my teeth. As I wiped my face on a purple hand towel
(Livvie had worked her frilly girl-magic in our bathroom), I stared at myself
in the mirror. It was my first birthday. I was twenty-eight. The feeling was
surreal. I wondered if I looked my age.

This
is my life.
I was a whore in my youth, a killer since
my adolescence, and a monster as a man. Who am I now?
What
am I now?
I shrugged.

Livvie and I had been living together
for about four months. It had taken some getting used to in the beginning. I
wasn’t accustomed to having another person around me every day. Although,
having already spent so much time with Livvie during her captivity and also having
made every effort to see her often while we were dating made it somewhat easier
to adjust. If I needed to hide out for a while, I would usually go upstairs to
work on Livvie’s library/office some more. Otherwise, I was downstairs working
on building new sets to exorcise my perversions (a few of the perversions were
her
ideas). Livvie made me put a lock on
the door so no one would accidentally stumble across it.

Livvie didn’t seem to have much of an
adjusting issue at all. She explained she was used to a house full of loud
people. If anything, she sometimes didn’t like the size of the house. She said
it was so big it felt empty sometimes. However, Claudia and Rubio practically
lived with us, so that didn’t last very long. On the days Livvie needed to be
alone, she was usually upstairs writing on her laptop.

I was ever changing and discovered that
while some things would always make me uncomfortable—Livvie’s new phone-relationship
with her mother, meeting new people, attending film festivals (I love Livvie,
but some of those people are so dull!), and explaining my lack of actual
employment—I was happy being James. Admittedly, there were moments when I
missed my former life, but for the most part I was becoming more comfortable
with my new life and the things that came with it: Livvie, friends, and… birthdays.

Livvie was impatiently waiting for me
once I reached the bottom of the stairs. She’d made small pancakes with
strawberries and bacon. They were arranged in a smile on my plate.

“I was expecting a bowl of cereal,” I
quipped.

“Don’t worry, I’m saving that for
tomorrow,” she replied. She came around the counter and put her hands on my
face. “Happy birthday, Sexy.” She pressed her lips to mine. She tasted like
orange juice and syrup. I chased the sweetness of her tongue, pulling her
toward me until I felt her go soft in my arms.

Livvie once told me I stole her breath
when we kissed. She said it was as though I filtered the very air she breathed
into her lungs. I thought it was more of her flowery words. However, once the
thought was planted in my mind, I began to pay particular attention. Yes, I
felt something too. I loved the moment Livvie gave herself to me. She became
nothing but her instincts. She swayed. She whimpered. She rubbed against me.

I let my hands travel down her back and
over her rounded ass. I pulled up her skirt. I was seconds away from putting my
thumbs in her panties and pulling them down when my efforts were thwarted.

“No, Sexy, not right now.” She put her
hands behind her in an attempt stop my mauling.

“Yes,” I said. “Right now.” I grabbed
her hands and held them in my left. With my free hand I began slipping her
panties down. I placed sucking kisses across her shoulder.

“James,” she groaned. “The windows.”

I sighed.

“Dammit! I’m putting in drapes. Today!”
I said, exasperated. What did I have to do to get laid on my birthday?

Livvie pulled away and righted her
clothing.

“Don’t be upset.” She kissed me quickly
before she scurried back into the kitchen to get her own breakfast. “You’ll have
plenty of time to play ‘Kitten’s been a naughty girl’ later. I promise.”

“We better,” I grumbled. I picked up a
piece of bacon and put it in my mouth. Rafiq wasn’t what one would call a
devout Muslim, but I was pretty sure he would roll over in his grave at the
sight of me devouring bacon. I, for one, really enjoyed it in moderation. “So
what do you have planned for me today? Please tell me it doesn’t involve
leaving the house.”

Livvie glared at me ruefully.

“Don’t be such a geezer, Sexy. Let’s
get out of here and have some fun.”

“I
hate
fun.”

Livvie laughed.

“You would. Good thing you’ll never
have to put out a personal ad.” She assumed her ridiculous parody of my voice.
“Hey, I’m James. I’m twenty-eight years old. I enjoy kicks to the face, having
sex on kitchen counters, stalking my girlfriend, and telling kids to get off my
lawn. I also hate fun. If you do too, hit me up.” She was nearly doubled over while
laughing at her own joke.

“I do
not
stalk you… anymore. Also, I’ve never yelled at anyone to get
off our lawn.”

“What about Claudia?”

“The front yard is not a place to tan.”
I couldn’t help but laugh at the memory of turning the sprinklers on Claudia.
She’d been mad as a hornet. I’d let her process her anger on the porch before
Livvie let her back inside.

Livvie and I joked a lot over
breakfast. Livvie is the only person I know who can make me furious one second
and laugh the next. She likes to say I’m contrary, but I feel the same
dichotomy is present in her. I suppose it keeps things interesting.

Livvie could not have planned a more
perfect day. To begin, she assured me we would be spending the day alone. As
much as I had come to like Claudia and Rubio, the only person I wanted to spend
my first birthday with was Livvie. I never had to pretend with her. I could be
myself—whoever that happened to be from one moment to the next.

Livvie was full of charm and whimsy. Since
I’d missed out on so many birthdays, she was determined to show me what I’d
missed. The first place she took me to was a go-kart racing track. Though
small, the karts could reach speeds of up to forty-five miles an hour.
Livvie won four out of seven races
—
she
weighs less than me, so her car was inevitably faster.
All things
being equal, I’m sure I could have won every time. Of course, Livvie didn’t
quite see it that way. She is a very sore winner.