Embraced (6 page)

Suddenly, he wanted her mouth under his. Barrett flipped her in his arms, pressing his lips down onto hers in a passionate, probing kiss. Meg felt a little overwhelmed by his ardor, especially since she couldn’t even hug him back without covering him in flour

- 45 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Carolyn Faulkner

and dough. Her hands were useless. Barrett’s head came up, and a devilish gleam entered his eye as if he’d had the same realization.

“Put your hands on the counter,” he said, biting her bottom lip just a little as if warning her to obey. Surprisingly, she did as she was told. His hands raised the hem of the cottony white blouse she was wearing until her breasts were exposed. The bra she was wearing was serviceable but hardly sexy. Not that he cared one way or the other. It wasn’t the bra he wanted, it was what was in the bra.

When he reached around behind her, bending her back a little against the counter, and undid the clasp, she started, but had no where to go. “Shhhhhh, Angel.”

“What about Mandy?”

“She’s down at the barn.” He released her breasts from their bondage, and drew in a breath at their creamy beauty.

Meagan was growing uncomfortable under his heated stare.

“What about – “

“I’ll kill anyone who comes through the door,” he promised hoarsely, warm breath misting over her breast just before his lips opened to caress her vulnerable nipple. Her whole body jerked against him, pressing more of her flesh into his waiting mouth. A strong hand splayed over her bottom, lifting her more closely to him, crushing her against him.

Her world was spinning dizzily; she felt totally and utterly out of control, and it frightened her. “Barrett, no - stop, please.”

As much as he didn’t want to, he respected the word “no,”

from any woman, particularly her. He wouldn’t have frightened her intentionally for the world, and stepped back a few paces to remove himself from temptation. Meg said nothing further under Barrett’s intense, watchful gaze as she straightened her clothing,

- 46 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Embraced

covered the dough with a dish towel and put it on a heating pad to rise, then washed her hands.

She sat down at the table and looked at him, saying softly,

“We have got to stop doing this.”

“Why?” The word was a bullet of sound.

“Because I don’t like it.”

His snort was loud and boorish. “Bull.”

Meg colored, then revised, “Okay, I don’t like the way it makes me feel.”

“Bull,” he repeated, eyes boring into her, trying to understand what she meant, what she felt.

“Not that.” She was at a loss to explain it to him.

“Then what, because I don’t want to stop, Meg.” He took another chair, turned it

backwards and opposite her, to straddle it with his arms resting on the top, leaning intently toward her.

She started to say something, let her breath out, then started again. “I don’t drink, Barrett, and it’s not that I’ve never had a drink or never been drunk. It’s just that I learned from getting drunk my first time that I don’t like the feeling of not being in control of myself or of what’s going on around me.”

He nodded – he wasn’t much for drinking either, for roughly the same reasons. Suddenly, his eyes narrowed. “Did someone take advantage of you while you were drunk?”

- 47 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Carolyn Faulkner

“No, no. I’ve – The first time I got drunk was at a sleepover when I was 14.” His eyebrows rose.

“I take it your parents were,” he said the word with genuine distaste, “permissive?”

She almost smiled. “You could say that. They were very generous parents, and loving in their own way. They let me do pretty much as I pleased.” He frowned, unable to comprehend that type of parenting.

“Anyway, I was completely safe in a house with about 8

other girls of roughly the same age the first time I imbibed.

Nothing bad happened, and in a way, it was good because I knew really early on that I didn’t like the taste or the affects of alcohol.

Unlike most of the rest of my high school and college classes, I can honestly say I was entirely sober through the whole, long time –

never even did any drugs, for exactly the same reason. I don’t want to be out of control, and that’s what you do to me by just walking into a room. You said something to me once about how I always walk out of a room just as you’re walking in – well, I admit it. I have, I did, I do. I’ve successfully avoided being alone with you since I’ve known Mandy because I knew when I first met you what you had the power to do to me. And I won’t allow it.”

He was bulldozed. “What do I have the power to do?”

“Make me forget myself. Lose control. Throw caution to the wind. Be exactly the opposite of who I am. I don’t like it, and it will not happen.”

Barrett didn’t think he’d ever been so inadvertently complimented or so smugly pleased with himself when he truly hadn’t done a thing to deserve it. He grinned, just couldn’t help it.

- 48 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Embraced

“Do you think I remain entirely unaffected by this attraction you feel?”

She took the question very seriously, when he hadn’t intended it that way. It should have been obvious to her that he was just as out of control around her. “Until I came down this time, I would have said that you didn’t even like me, much less want me sexually.”

He was taken aback. “You didn’t think I liked you?”

“You’re a gruff person with everyone but your family.

Friendly, you’re not. And all the times you came up to visit Mandy, you were nice enough to include me in most of what you did with her, but I could see it was grudging, and I felt your disapproval of me from across several states.”

“If I had disapproved of you, I’d’ve made Mandy change roommates.”

Meg sighed. “I’m only telling you how I perceived things.

That doesn’t make them right or wrong, they’re just my perceptions.” She twirled a lock of hair around her fingers. “I used to be so jealous of Mandy and her brothers. She was always getting a call from one of you. You were always coming up to visit. She got letters and care packages . . . “

“Didn’t your parents come visit you at all?” he frowned, becoming less and less enamored of her so-called parents.

“My Mom and Dad were too busy enjoying their empty nest. I got a lot of ‘wish you were here’ postcards from all over the world. As soon as they got me moved into the dorm with Manda, they sold the house I grew up in, and bought a motor home to tour the country.”

- 49 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Carolyn Faulkner

He caught that fidgeting hand and kissed the back of it. “If I’d have known, I would have included you in more things we did.

If I’d known, I would have made you feel more a part of the family.

I assumed you had your own family taking care of you, but I was wrong.”

“Thanks, but I don’t want your sympathy, Barrett. I want you to keep your hands to yourself, particularly if I’m going to work here this summer. My decision is still up in the air.”

Barrett leaned toward her thoughtfully. “Huh. I wouldn’t have pegged you for a control-freak.”

“Yeah, that’s much more your style than mine. Still, there you have it.”

“But there’s much more to it than that, Angel. At the heart of it, because you had parents that you didn’t feel were there for you in any way except monetarily, you have to create your own structure for yourself by controlling everything. But you never learned how to trust anyone else to help you support it.”

Meg frowned. “Stop calling me that, and don’t psychoanalyze me.”

“But I’m right.”

“Whether you’re right or not is immaterial.” She stood, grabbing hold of the back of the chair until her knuckles were white. “I want your promise that you won’t touch me again.”

“Let me get this straight: You’re attracted to me, you like it when I touch you, but because it feels too good, you don’t want me to touch you ever again.” She nodded in agreement. “Mandy’ll tell

- 50 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Embraced

you, Darlin’. I don’t make promises I can’t keep.” In one motion, he stood and pulled her against him, lifting her off her feet so that she had to lean on his body for support and loop her arms around his neck to maintain her balance. He whispered huskily to her, “I promise you that the sex between us is going to singe the sheets. I promise you that you’ll scream and go wild beneath me every time, even the first time. I promise you I’ll never hurt you sexually. But I’ll be damned if I’ll give you my word on something that neither one of us wants me to keep.” With a his hand buried in her hair, he bent her head back and took her mouth – no more mister nice guy.

The kiss was a possession, a branding of her as his, meant to inflame every nerve ending she owned, and it succeeded completely. She was limp as a wet noodle when he raised his lips from hers.

“Stay with me,” he whispered, “trust me to take care of you when the world spins around without you. Cling to me, let me be your anchor in the storm.”

Tears bled into her eyes and she had to blink fast to catch them before they fell. Who knew he was a romantic at heart, the big lug. He let her slide down his fully aroused body till her feet touched the floor, then removed himself from her presence to stomp down the hall and bang closed the door of his study.

Meagan stood there, alone in the middle of the big empty kitchen, having gotten what she wanted. He had taken his hands off her.

That

was
what she’d wanted, wasn’t it?

- 51 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Carolyn Faulkner

t had been a little more than a week since Barrett had made his outrageous offer and Meagan had almost I decided to take it. He had been very circumspect regarding her decision, and had not pressured her about it at all. He was very true to his “un”-promise – instead of not touching her at all, he touched her compulsively, at any opportunity. Meg was becoming more and more used to the feelings he could conjure in her with just a glance across the dinner table, and was glad that he’d refused to comply with her ridiculous demand – not that she’d ever admit that to him in a million years.

Before she let him know that she was accepting, she wanted to make some administrative arrangements, get her mail forwarded, etc. One of her first phone calls was to the small town bank that held the mortgage on her tiny condo. She spoke to a customer service person that took her temporary change of address, but also let her know that her next mortgage payment wasn’t due until October. That was impossible, she contended. The woman was adamant. They’d received a large payment to the account about seven days ago by wire transfer, which originated from a bank in Texas.

Meg pressed the disconnect button on the cordless phone in her room and threw the phone onto the bed, startling Butch, who, eyeing the look on his mistress’s face jumped down and hid under the bed. Smart dog. A few seconds later, a seething Meagan burst

- 52 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Embraced

into Barrett’s study. His eyes widened at her expression and he ditched the person he’d been talking to on the phone immediately.

She got as far into his face as she could without one iota of fear in her eyes. Few men would confront him this way, but Meg was obviously not thinking of the fact that he was easily twice her size.

“You take back the money you paid on my mortgage, and you do it right now!” She handed him the receiver of his desk phone, which he replaced.

“No,” he replied succinctly, almost grinning at her vexation.

She looked like she was going to explode, or perhaps hit him.

Neither idea was a good one. “You’ve been cooking up a storm for the past week, feeding this army of a family pretty much breakfast, lunch, and dinner. You’re not a slave. I wanted to reward you and let you know how much I appreciate your work.”

“Then buy me a god’am Hallmark. I’m not a slave, but I’m not your kept woman, either!” she growled.

He sputtered. “Kept?” It was his turn to be angry, and she could see the muscle in his cheek working as his jaw clenched.

“I’ve barely touched you, and you think you’re being kept? Not that it’s not a good idea . . .”

Put that way, it sounded ridiculous even to her own ears, but she couldn’t back down now. “You take that money back now, Barrett!” Here they came, the tears of frustration that always accompanied her anger. Hours later, she’d come up with witty repartee, but now, while the situation was ongoing, all she could resort to was idiotic platitudes.

He came out from around the desk to meet her, nose to nose, having to bend down a little to accomplish it. “If you would prefer being kept, let me know. I’m sure I could arrange

- 53 -

BacksideOfLove.com

Carolyn Faulkner

something. The pay is much higher, but the duties are considerably more demanding. You’d certainly be a lot busier than you are now; you’d earn every penny I paid you and then some.”

Meg gulped, but didn’t move away. “No, I do not want to be kept.”

“Pity,” he barked, but he meant it. Stubborn little wench wasn’t about to stand down; she continued to meet his eyes, and even pressed her nose that much harder against his, standing on tiptoes to do it. He stood still for a moment, knowing her calves would begin to ache shortly. When she began to fidget, but still hadn’t looked away, Barrett ended the stand off by picking her up and cradling her across his lap, leaning against the edge of the big oak desk for support. “I will not take back that money – STAY

STILL!,” he commanded, tightening his arms and subduing her with incredible ease. “But I will take it off the amount I pay you for the summer. It’s your choice. Either take it as payment for these two weeks if you don’t stay, or I’ll deduct the amount from what I pay you if you do stay.” His voice dropped to an indecent whisper, “The third alternative would earn you a helluva lot more money – “ He had to laugh when she skittered away the minute he released her to stand in the middle of the room, looking disconcerted.