Ellen Foster (14 page)

But I told her to bring her hair supplies. I sure would like to feel her fingers working fast in my hair again.

Her name is all I can think about and when I hand my breakfast dishes to my new mama I say you remember Starletta’s coming home with me this afternoon right?

Yes and I think we’re all ready for the big event she says and laughs a little.

Then when the bus comes I need to tell the driver first thing that I’ll be having a extra passenger on board this afternoon. She’ll be getting off at my house. She’s colored but don’t act like you notice. And she’ll be sitting right up front with me. And she’ll be getting off at my house.

He just says for me to hurry up and sit down and then he looks back at me in the rear view mirror like I am a nut.

I’m just all excited I want to say to him.

God a day can go by slow when you are dying for it to fly.

Oh Starletta I say in my head all morning and then I go in the lunchroom and see her mama has her scrubbed gleaming brown and Lord look at her all dressed up in a jumper and a round neck collar shirt. She has on her Sunday shoes. And I know without looking her drawers have rows and rows of lace across the tail.

It is all I can do not to break out of my lunch line and run over there and make sure she brought her suitcase or bag or box or just anything just as long as she didn’t forget she’s coming home with me today.

But I wait to buy my milk in the line like I should. Then I find her sitting with all her colored friends and I say loud have you got everything all packed to come to my house all weekend?

And she reaches under the table and drags up a grocery bag folded over at the top I know is filled with pajamas and drawers and her personal hygiene.

Good.

Well you meet me at my classroom when the bell rings and I’ll take you to my bus. OK?

And then I eat my soup and dread the afternoon and all that time that is keeping me and Starletta apart.

By the time the bell finally does ring I am so wore out with the waiting I say to myself I could use a nap before we start playing. But it is too late for that.

I do not say much on the bus. I figure I’ll do all my talking when I have her to myself. Or maybe not so much talking. Just right much doing.

I have changed my plans for the weekend three times and I finally have something I can live with.

First we will get off the bus. Then we’ll go inside and she can meet my new mama. I already told my new mama I would like for her to make a fuss over how pretty Starletta is. But not the kind of fuss that says you sure are pretty to be colored. The kind that says you sure are pretty and that is all. The other way does not count.

Then we’ll put her belongings away in the drawer I have cleared out special. And then I’ll direct her to the toilet and stand back while she sees the bathtub and her towels.

That is right much for somebody to take in all at one time so I thought then we would lay down and rest until supper. Then she could see how I enjoy staying laid up in my bed waiting for supper to cook.

And you can guess what all is on the menu.

And when my new mama greets Starletta she says everything perfect just like we rehearsed and like she means it her own self. It sounds so good to me because I know it is true.

So this is Starletta she says. Ellen told me what a pretty girl you are and I can see it is the truth. I want you to make yourself right at home this weekend and if there is anything you need you just let me know.

We had not rehearsed that last part. I think that is a nice touch.

Then my new mama squeezes all of her girls hello and I introduce Starletta to Roger. He does not want to meet anybody new right now because he is loving up on Stella.

OK everybody has met you so let’s go on back here and I’ll show you where to put your stuff.

Starletta looks all around at how clean everything is and I know she has her eye on the scratchy carpet so I tell her my new mama sucks all the dirt up with a thing and you could roll all over this house and never get dirty. I can look in her eyes and see her mark that down on her list of things to do this weekend.

When she puts her clothes away and after I show her the toilet I say we need to rest a while because that is what I always do between school and supper.

But what I really want to do is get her off by herself so I can talk to her good. I need to tell her about what all I have up my sleeve fun for the weekend and then I have some big things to tell her.

You change out of your school clothes and put on some britches. Did you bring some britches? If you didn’t you can
probably fit into a pair of mine. You are about as big as me. Look at us there in the mirror.

She is still about a hand smaller than me though.

Come on and crawl up here and rest with me for a while. This is the way I always do.

Let’s talk some now. I’ll start I say to her but I do not look at her face but up at the ceiling but I feel her laid flat and still beside me waiting for me to begin.

Starletta I’ve looked forward to you coming to my house and I hope you have a fine time here. I sure like it here. Do you remember me living with my daddy and how I used to come to your house so much?

I sure do she says to me and it takes twice as long for her to get that out as normal because she stutters bad and she gets frustrated.

Well I came to your house so much because I did not want to be with my daddy and mostly because I like you so much. Even if my daddy had been the president I would have still run down to your house whenever I needed to play. Do you believe me?

And I look at her so she can nod and will not need to speak.

She hates to talk.

Starletta I always thought I was special because I was white and when I thought about you being colored I said to myself it sure is a shame Starletta’s colored. I sure would hate to be that way. White people selling your mama’s quilts like they do. And the three of you live in that house that’s about to fall down. I always went away from your house wondering how you stood to live without a inside toilet. I know your daddy
just put one in but you went a long time without one. Longer than any white folks I know. And when I thought about you I always felt glad for myself. And now I don’t know why. I really don’t. And I just wanted to tell you that. You don’t have to say anything back. You just lay there and wait for supper.

And I will lay here too and wait for supper beside a girl that every rule in the book says I should not have in my house much less laid still and sleeping by me.

But while I watch her asleep now I remember that they changed that rule. So it does not make any sense for me to feel like I’m breaking the law.

Nobody but a handful of folks I know pays attention to rules about how you treat somebody anyway. But as I lay in that bed and watch my Starletta fall asleep I figure that if they could fight a war over how I’m supposed to think about her then I’m obligated to do it. It seems like the decent thing to do.

I came a long way to get here but when you think about it real hard you will see that old Starletta came even farther.

And I watch her resting now because soon we’ll all be eating supper and maybe some cake tonight and I say low Starletta you sure have a right to rest.

And all this time I thought I had the hardest row to hoe.

That will always amaze me.

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© 1987 BY KAYE GIBBONS. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

E-book ISBN 978-1-56512-729-6