Easy Kisses (The Boudreaux Series Book 4) (19 page)

“I told you about Amy, my ex-wife, and how our marriage ended.”

“Yes, that you’d found her cheating on you.”

He nods and paces the room.

“The thing is, her cheating on me was the least of it. She did me a favor by fucking around because she gave me a valid reason to leave her.”

“What did she do to you?” I ask, and clench my shaking hands in my lap.

“Physically? Just the scratches on my arm. But she was manipulative and emotionally abusive from the moment we got married. I was an idiot. I would give in every time she threatened to kill herself if she didn’t get her way or like the way things were going.”

“She threatened to
kill herself
?”

“Not often in the beginning, but as time went on, it became more frequent. I don’t know how many times I’d come home to find that she’d swallowed pills and I had to call an ambulance. She could cue tears at the drop of a hat.

“I had her in therapy over and over again. She would claim that the therapist came on to her, or tried to have sex with her, and would refuse to go back.” He turns to me, his deep blue eyes radiating pain. “Those poor men, and one woman, did nothing wrong but tell her that she’s a sociopath.

“I couldn’t help her, and it tore me apart. I thought I loved her, and I did. Otherwise I never would have asked her to marry me.”

“But she was abusive, Simon.”

“She was ill.”

“Bullshit.” I stand and prop my hands on my hips. “She was a mean, manipulative woman. She knew exactly what she was doing. She was playing head games with you for her own enjoyment.”

He swallows hard.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know her, but I can see what she did to you.”

“I’ve made it my life’s work to empower women. To help them believe that they are worthy of everything wonderful in this world. I’ve helped women leave their abusive husbands, end careers that were toxic, and even stand up to parents and family members who were nothing but bullies. And here I am, a man who couldn’t help his wife. You were right in Montana, I am a hypocrite.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, you are no such thing.” Now I’m just angry. At him for believing this bullshit and at her for, well, for being her. “I was mad at you and I shouldn’t have said that. She didn’t
want
to be helped, Simon. That’s what you need to realize. I hate this saying, but it’s true: you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink. You did what you could for her, but she didn’t think anything was wrong. She was manipulating you, and she was pretending to be sick. In reality, she loved the attention you gave her, and she loved getting her own way.”

He’s watching me with so much hope in his eyes that I want to cry. My God, has he been clinging to this false sense of responsibility for all this time?

“I’m proud of you for walking away and washing your hands of her. And I understand not wanting to air all your dirty laundry to your family, but they should know some of it, Simon. Especially if your mother is choosing to keep Amy in her life.”

“I don’t think she’s choosing it, I think Amy is just pressing all the right buttons to keep herself there. You’re right, I should tell Mum more of it, so she knows what she’s dealing with. I just didn’t want her to be disappointed in me. And that may be the first time I’ve ever admitted that. I sound like a coward.”

“You sound like someone who was abused,” I reply gently and wrap my arms around him. “I’ve never been there, but Savannah has, and she had many of the same feelings. You do so many great things for people. You should be proud of that, and if it was your relationship with Amy that circled you around to it, well, then maybe it was worth it. But you have to reconcile it for what it was and move on, Simon.”

“You’re an amazing woman, Charlotte Boudreaux.”

“I think I’m just the voice of reason right now.”

He catches my chin with his finger and tilts my face up to look at him. “Thank you.”

“You can pay me back later.” I press my lips to his chin, then check the time. “I’m about to be amazingly late. Feel free to unpack and just put your things wherever you want. I’ll see you tonight.”

“Are you okay, love?”

“Of course.” I send him a bright smile. “Just call me if you need me.”

“Have a good day.”

I blow him a kiss and leave, my mind reeling. When he was telling me what Amy did to him, I wanted to sit and weep for him. What a grade-A bitch. I’d like just five minutes alone with her.

And given that I’d like five minutes alone with her, I’m just fucking angry. How could anyone treat another human being like that? What kind of sick joy does that bring them?

I’ve never felt this overwhelming need to protect a man before. Not that he needs it; she can’t hurt him now. But I feel fiercely territorial.

And this is new.

I don’t know what to do about it. I still don’t see how a relationship with Simon can make it long-term. He can’t stay in New Orleans forever, and I don’t plan to leave.

But I do know that I’m going to enjoy him for every minute he’s here.

***

I flip the sign to
closed
at exactly six o’clock. It’s the first time I haven’t stayed open later in…I can’t even remember. I usually take my time, visit with straggling customers, count the till, organize credit card receipts, and I even sit and pore through shoes online, deciding what to buy next.

But not tonight. I’m excited to go home. Not because there’s someone to go home to, but because it’s Simon.

I’m ready to see Simon.

Even the evening traffic doesn’t bother me a bit. I whistle along with the radio, and patiently make my way through town. Butterflies set up residence in my belly as I pull into the driveway. Simon’s rental is parked at the curb.

I walk in and grin when I see him at my dining table chatting on the phone. He glances up and smiles at me, that smile that makes me forget that I have knees, and finishes his call.

“How was your day?” he asks.

“Busy, so it was a good day,” I reply and set my handbag and keys on the table. “How about you?”

“The same.” He kisses me gently, sending a shiver down my arms. “I brought all of my things over.”

“Great.”

“There are a few things that I couldn’t find a home for, so you can just tell me where you want to put them.”

“That’s fine.” I look up at him and realize that he looks nervous. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong.” He grips my shoulders, then rubs his hands up and down my arms. “But I need a favor.”

“Okay.”

“I have to record my weekly video today. I missed last week, and I can’t miss two in a row.”

“Of course not. You have quite a following.”

He grins. “I usually have a camera guy, but I obviously didn’t bring him with me from London. I can record the whole thing here, then send it to him and he’ll cut it together and make it look nice to go live.”

“Sounds good. What do you need me for?”

“I need you to run the camera. I’ll just use my phone, which is fine, but I’ll need you to make sure I’m centered in the shot, hit record, and end it as well.”

“This sounds like a very easy job. I can handle it.” I give him a mock salute. “Why do you look nervous? You’ve recorded hundreds of these.”

“Today’s topic is going to be a bit more personal.”

He doesn’t say anything more. He sits at the table, and I realize he’s already set up his phone across from him.

He looks amazing. He’s in jeans and a casual polo shirt, showing off the tattoos on his arm. His hair is combed back, and he’s clean-shaven.

He looks professional and comfortable, which is perfect for pulling a viewer in. It worked for me, anyway, when Van and I sat and watched just about every video he had available. Of course, this is the first time he’s recorded a video without long sleeves.

And now he’s sitting in my house, recording his video.

And I’m sleeping with him.

Crazy.

“Everyone will see your tats.”

He glances down and then shrugs. “I’ve decided I don’t care.”

“Any special reason?”

“I didn’t bring a long-sleeved shirt.” He grins and I shake my head.

“Are you ready?” I ask, looking at the camera. “You’re in frame.”

“Yes, ready when you are. If I mess up, I’ll start at the beginning of my thought, and Perry will fix it later.”

“Okay. One, two, three.” I press record, and Simon’s whole demeanor immediately changes. He’s the confident, in control life coach that his fans can’t get enough of, and I’m excited to see what he’s going to speak about.

“Hello, everyone, and thank you for joining me this week. As you may have noticed, I missed last week’s video, but I’m back this week with something that I think many of you will identify with. This week’s topic is
How to know when your partner is manipulating you.

“I try to keep my personal life very separate from my professional life, but I’m also a human being, and I’ve experienced many of the same things that you have. This topic is one that I’ve been hesitant to talk about because it is so deeply personal, but someone whom I care about very much reminded me today that there is no shame in being human.”

He’s not looking into the lens now, but rather in my eyes. I’m stunned. I sit quietly and listen intently as he describes what it is to be in an intimate relationship with someone who betrays your trust by manipulating and hurting you. His face is passive, but his eyes are passionate.

“I know what it is to feel responsible for making a partner happy, and how defeating it is when nothing you ever do is good enough. To have your significant other threaten personal harm if they don’t get their way. It’s a helpless, horrible position to be in.

“And I’m here to tell you that it’s not normal, and it’s not okay. If you are being treated this way, by anyone in your life, whether it be a colleague, a boyfriend or girlfriend, a family member or friend, it is imperative that you draw the line in the sand and make it very clear that while you care about them, they may
not
manipulate you. Offer to help them find a counselor, and if they insist they don’t need help, perhaps it’s time to step away from the relationship, no matter how scary that may be.

“I want you to remember that no matter what, your physical and mental health are the most important thing. That is not being selfish; that is protecting yourself, so you can participate in healthy relationships. Cutting toxic people from your life is necessary for your own personal health and growth.

“I personally think a lot of us feel ashamed when we try so hard to help someone, only to have that help thrown back in our face or ignored altogether, and we are doing ourselves such a disservice in feeling that way. It’s important to speak up, and to talk to those closest to you so they can help you. No one who loves you will stand for you being manipulated or hurt, and you should not be ashamed to talk about it.”

He smiles kindly at the camera and I can feel tears in my eyes. Something tells me this is a
huge
step for Simon.

“Thank you for joining me this week.”

He nods and I stop the recording, and then take a long, deep breath. I don’t quite know what to say.

Simon scrubs his hands over his face.

“Please tell me that was okay because I don’t think I have it in me to do it again.”

“You did great,” I reply and clear my throat. “I think it was a beautiful message, and you were eloquent in your delivery.”

“I rehearsed it all day. I’ve never done that before.” He looks up at me, still across the table. “I still don’t know if I should air it.”

“Can I be brutally honest?”

“Always.”

“I think you’d be doing yourself and your fans a disservice by
not
airing it. If even one person sees that and recognizes herself and pulls out of an abusive situation, it will have been worth it. And I think that fans like it when they can see that you’re a human being. That you may know a lot of things, but you don’t know
everything.
We are all a work in progress.”

Without a word, he stands and walks around the table, then pulls me to my feet and into his arms. He hugs me tightly, rocking back and forth, his face buried in my hair.

“Thank you, Charly. You have no idea what you did for me today.”

“Simon, you already had all of this in you. I just talked you through it. I imagine I’m not the first to try.”

“No, but it was the first time I was willing to hear it,” he says, his voice muffled against my head. “You are a brilliant, gorgeous woman, and I’m so thankful that I found you.”

I cling onto him, enjoying the way he’s rocking us, settled against him. “I think I found you, remember?”

“Either way,” he says, a smile in his voice. “Thank you.”

Chapter Fifteen

~Charly~

“They’re here already,” I say to Simon as we walk into a restaurant just a few blocks away from my shop the next day. “Now you’ll have met everyone.”

“Rumor has it, Beau and Eli are the hardest to win over.”

“That rumor is probably true,” I reply and smile sweetly. “Don’t worry.”

“I’m not,” he says and kisses my forehead, just as we approach the table, earning glares from both of my brothers.

“Hi, guys, sorry we’re late.”

“You’re not,” Kate says. “We were early because your brothers wanted to have home court advantage.”

“You’re not supposed to tell them that,” Eli says to his wife with a scowl. “I’m Eli.”

“Simon,” Simon says, shaking Eli’s hand. “You must be Beau.”

“That’s right. I’m the oldest brother,” Beau says, and Kate and I both roll our eyes at the way my brothers puff out their chests and give Simon stern looks.

“I’m thirty,” I remind them all. “And this isn’t some sort of weird approval thing. This is just lunch.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Eli replies and holds Kate’s hand.

“Neither do I,” Beau says. “We’re just here to enjoy a meal with our sister and her…
friend.
”

“Men,” I mumble and smile apologetically at Simon, who just squeezes my thigh reassuringly.