Stranded On Christmas

Stranded
On Christmas

By:
Rachel Burns

Text
Copyright © 2014 by Rachel Burns

All
Rights Reserved

This
is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, incidents and
dialogues are products of the author's imagination or are used
fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead,
events or locales is entirely coincidental.

Jessie

I
stood perfectly still right behind him and thought about the act of
chance, which had brought me here to exactly this house at this time.
It had been a case of bad luck.

Some
people called luck a lady. Personally, I thought of her more like a
moody bitch. Luck had never really served me well.

The
man, I was standing behind, was my husband. It had been a shotgun
wedding without me being pregnant. I had only said
'yes'
because I hadn't had a choice. He was basically keeping me against my
will.

But
right now he was protecting me. He was usually the person that I
needed protecting from. He was a very strict husband. Even if he had
been so nice to me after tragedy had hit us.

It
all started right before Christmas …

…
I
had been working in my office when the phone rang.

I
answered and smiled to myself thinking that life couldn't get better.
It was my boyfriend. He wanted to see me right after work.

I
hung up my phone and looked under my desk. My wiener dog, Pumpkin was
in her basket, which was hidden under my desk.

I
grinned at my small light brown lap dog. “That was him,” I told
Pumpkin, petting over his long back. “He called saying that he
wanted me to meet him before we take off this evening. I have a funny
feeling that he wants to pop the question.”

I
sighed and looked out of the window for a moment, just picturing it.
I had a feeling that he wanted me to have a ring on my finger before
he took me to meet his parents.

I
felt like such a grown up. Usually, I still felt like a kid. By that
I meant I still felt like I was me. I hadn't really changed other
than the fact that I was wearing grown up clothes now.

I
pictured Jamie down on one knee opening up a tiny box with a ring in
it. The diamond would sparkle as light reflected off of it. He would
offer me the ring, a sign of his love, and I would say yes. Then we
could live happily ever after.

I
went back to work. I needed to hurry, so I could get out of here on
time. I even had to work ahead. I wouldn't be back at my desk until
next year after the holidays. Jamie was taking me home for Christmas.
I figured I would be meeting my future in-laws. I hoped they were
nice.

I
powered through the in-coming tasks and did what I could to see they
were filled before Christmas.

When
I was finished, I got out Pumpkin's leash and off we went. I left him
in the car while I went into the bar area of the restaurant. Jamie
said I should meet him there.

My
first clue that things weren't going to go as I planned was the blond
woman with her arms around Jamie's neck.

I
stopped dead in my tracks. A thousand different explanations went
through my head, like the idea that she might be a cousin. Perhaps
she would be riding along with us, and she was thankful for the ride,
really very thankful from the looks of things.

I
walked over to him with a stupid grin on my face, telling myself not
to look like a jealous needy girlfriend. Maybe he needed someone from
the family as moral support when he asked me to marry him.

Naturally,
she wouldn't be the other woman. Jamie had told me to come here, not
the other way around. I wasn't catching him at anything.

“
Hi,
Jamie.” I sounded too peppy and very unnatural.

The
woman straightened up and walked off.

Usually,
I would have given him a kiss, greeting him in a way just I could
greet him. But my shoulders were stiff. They refused to lean in
towards him as I sat down across from him. I was sitting up perfectly
straight. My pose was defensive.

Why
was he still smiling? He should be explaining.

“
Hey,
Jessie. Thanks for coming.” He laid his hand on my knee. I wanted
to pull it away from him. Bells and whistles were going off in my
head, warning me to brace myself. We had been together for over a
year now. I had such a bad feeling.

“
I
have something to tell you.”

Tell,
not ask, I thought.

“
I
met the most amazing girl last week. I didn't want to say anything
until I was sure, and I didn't want to break it off on the phone
either. But I think she is the one.” He was grinning from ear to
ear as he shared this life-changing information with me. Didn’t he
realize that it would change my life too? This wouldn’t be
improving my life.

I
wanted to slap that grin right off of him. I was mad as hell. He had
been seeing her for a week, and we had sex on Tuesday evening. So he
was seeing us both at the same time.

Did
that mean that I hadn't passed some sort of odd sex test?

I
looked over his shoulder and saw that she was standing in the hallway
by the restrooms, watching us. She was beautiful and wearing an
expensive looking red dress. Her blond hair was twisted up in an
elegant bun. She was thin, and her dress was so tight. Her thinness
didn't come from her finding the perfect dress to hide her trouble
spots. She didn't have any to hide. She was drinking a glass of wine
and just waiting for me to leave.

I
had a picture in my head that this was her idea. She would have
wanted to see me, so she could figure out whether or not I was real
competition.

I
wasn't. I was a very simple boring girl. I had blond hair but it was
mixed in with a lot of plain brown. My eyes were plain brown too. I
wasn't fat, but I wasn't thin either.

If
I were him, I would have chosen her, too.

“
Farewell,”
I said, standing up. This didn't need to be drawn out. I wanted it
over with quickly. That would be better for me. Just seeing her
wasn't good for my self-esteem. I could never, no matter what, be as
beautiful as she was.

He
didn't protest, so I just turned away from them and left. At the door
I paused and peeked back at them. She was in his arms, smiling, and
he was smiling back at her.

At
least he was happy. I did want that for him, but it shouldn't have
been so easy for him to say goodbye to me.

He
didn't love me, and he never had.

I
hurried to my car. I needed to have a good cry, and I needed it now.
I didn't want anyone to see me.

It
took me forever to open the car door. My pointer finger kept hitting
the wrong button, lock, over and over again. Once I could see
straight enough to push the right button and unlock my car, I sighed,
relieved.

I
took a deep breath and got in quickly. Pumpkin jumped onto my lap and
started to lick my face. I laid my head down on the steering wheel to
bawl, thankful for the darkness, so no one could see me.

It
was cold and snowing out, or I would have probably stayed in my car
for hours, but the reality of the coldness made me drive to my
apartment. I was cursing myself the whole time. Of course someone
like Jamie wouldn't be interested in me.

I
had the money – but not the looks. The company was my idea. I had
built it up on my own. I offered people a personalized system. We did
things for people that help them fulfill their dreams.

Sometimes
I was on the net, searching for a rare baseball card. Other times I
was on the phone hiring a plumber to go to a woman's house when her
husband wasn't home. The plumber would fix what was broken in a way
that made it look like the husband had done it himself.

Sometimes
I arranged for craftsmen to meet up with husbands at the hardware
store. They would make friends and go over to the man's house and the
men would
'try'
to fix the problem together.

I
had a list of craftsman willing to do that for me. They were
especially good actors and great guys. The wives were happy when they
had running water again, and the husbands thought that they had done
something great for their family. Everyone was a winner.

I
lived for my company. It was all I had, and it was closed over the
holidays. There was nothing to divert my attention.

I
looked over at Pumpkin sitting in the passenger seat next to me. It
was clear that he would remain the only man in my life. His love was
at least real.

I
went up to my apartment and looked for food, so I could make myself
something to eat. For once I wasn't hungry. Which was good because I
had cleaned out my refrigerator and thrown out all of my perishable
food, so it wouldn’t go bad while I was away.

I
needed to lose the few extra pounds that I had on me, get a decent
makeover and maybe buy some new clothes. No, I definitely needed new
clothes. After my extra weight was gone, my things wouldn't fit
anymore.

If
I changed myself, then I could get a man.

Feeling
something, like a spark of hope, I walked over to my bookshelf, the
one with the weight loss books. I had several favorites. That thought
depressed me all the more. I had stood here before, and I had never
lost a pound. Instead, I had been gradually gaining.

I
felt disgusting and like a failure. I let myself fall on the sofa. It
was a helpless situation. I couldn't lose the weight, and I would
never find a man. I was getting older and less interesting by the
second.

Wasn't
there even a saying about me being more likely to be hit by lightning
than to get married?

I
bawled until I started to get a headache. I got up and looked at my
packed suitcases. I had gifts for Jamie's parents in them and a
special gift for him, too. It was that stupid expensive watch Jamie
had been pining after. He had practically been begging for it.

Why
hadn't I seen that he was more interested in my money than in me?

I
decided to drive up to Canada. The idea had just popped into my head.
My favorite aunt and uncle lived up there. I was their godchild. They
had raised me, and they would love to see me.

I
whistled for Pumpkin who had gone to his basket for one of his many
naps. His head perked right up, and he came running. I turned off all
the lights and slipped into my boots. With a suitcase in each hand we
walked out of the door and down to my car. I put in my bags. Then I
opened the car door for Pumpkin, so he could jump in. I went back
into my apartment and got his basket, doggy dishes and a sack of his
food. I locked up and went off on my mission to make myself feel
better.