Dropped Third Strike (Portland Pioneers #1) (26 page)

“Hey Derek,” he said. “Do you have a minute?”

Derek nodded and followed Reid through the tunnels underneath the ballpark.

“What’s up, Coach?” Derek asked when they finally stopped a safe distance away from where all the players and staff were.

“I just wanted to apologize for last night,” Reid said.

Derek shook his head. “We’ve all been there. It’s no big deal.”

“Yes it is,” Reid said. “It was stupid of me to drink that much and then make you drive me. You shouldn’t have had to deal with any of that. I’m supposed to be the mature one here.”

Derek laughed a little. “We’re ballplayers, maturity is hard when you play a game for a living.”

Reid couldn’t help but laugh. There was a degree of truth to what Derek had said.

“It’s really OK, Coach B,” Derek said. “I mean, I don’t understand why you were drinking or whatever, but clearly it had something to do with Miss Marks, so I get it. Women make us do crazy things sometimes.”

Again, Reid had to agree with the younger player. That reasoning was why Reid had done his best not to let any woman get to him over the years – several had tried and failed. The only one who had broken through them had done it without trying or even realizing what she’d done. She still didn’t have any idea. In fact, she thought he’d used her. Reid knew he needed to set things straight at some point, but he still needed time to figure out how to do that.

“And don’t worry,” Derek said, pulling Reid out of his thoughts. “I’m not going to tell anyone about what I heard or saw last night. You kept my secret. I’ll keep yours.”

“I appreciate that, Derek,” Reid said. “But it’s not going to stay much of a secret thanks to the press.”

Derek looked confused until Reid told him about the photos and the press conference.

“Wow. I bet Miss Marks is really mad,” Derek said.

“She is, but I’m used to that by now,” Reid said with a sigh.

“So do you want to go grab dinner?” Derek asked.

“Sure, let me get changed and we’ll go,” Reid said.

Reid was grateful when Derek didn’t push him for more details about his drunken night. As they ate, they simply discussed the season, the team, and their thoughts on the next series.

Out of the blue, Derek also mentioned that his ex-wife had been in touch with him. There was no hope of reconciliation, and Derek seemed resigned to that, but Keely wanted to make sure he was still in his daughter’s life. She still didn’t trust Derek completely, which he understood, so any visits with Brynn would be supervised. Fortunately, she did trust Derek’s family. During their conversations, Derek and Keely had made arrangements for his parents to keep Brynn for a week, during which they would visit Portland to see Derek. That visit was just two weeks away, and Derek could not hide his excitement.

“She’s gotten so big,” he gushed, showing Reid a picture of the little girl on his phone. “I guess she’s talking now and everything.”

“I’m glad you’ll get to see her,” Reid said.

“Yeah, I’m just afraid she won’t really know me,” Derek said. “Keely said she can be kind of shy, and I haven’t been around her.”

“So she might not know you at first, but I’m sure she’ll get used to you,” Reid said. “If you work to make her a priority and visit her more regularly, you’ll be fine.”

Derek nodded. “That’s what I intend to do. I plan to spend as much of the off-season with her as I can. I even told Keely I’d like to keep her while she and her new husband go on a honeymoon.”

“Wow … that can’t have been easy to say,” Reid said.

“It wasn’t,” Derek admitted. “I still love Keely, and I think I always will. But I messed up. I let her believe I didn’t care enough about her, so she found someone who will treat her the way she deserves. I’ll regret that forever, but there’s nothing I can do to change it now. The only relationship I can still save is the one I have with Brynn, so that’s my focus.”

Reid nodded as he listened. And the look in the younger guy’s eyes as he talked about regretting the way he treated his wife, the woman he loved, hit Reid hard. Maybe it was too late for him to fix things with Kate too, but he at least had to try. He needed to apologize and explain to her what had happened to him all those years ago.

It seemed the hardest part would be finding an opportunity to talk to her. Work was insanely busy, and he’d started seeing a therapist about his drinking and other problems.

Plus, he couldn’t find Kate. The only time he saw her was in her seats during the game. He went to her office a few times, but each time she was in a meeting or on the phone. At least that’s what her secretary said. He didn’t know how true it was. He thought about going to her house, but that hadn’t gone so well last time, so he decided against it. That would be a last ditch strategy, and as the weeks went on, it looked like he might have to use it.

The season was quickly winding down. The regular season, that is. The postseason was on the minds and tongues of everyone in baseball, including the Pioneers staff and fans. For the first time in franchise history, the team was poised to play beyond game 162.

The Angels had crumbled, losing 13 straight games and surrendering their division lead to the Rangers. Now the Pioneers were in second place, just three games behind the Rangers. The two teams would face off for a four-game set to end the season, so the Pioneers still had a chance to win their division.

There was also a wild card at stake. The Pioneers had grabbed the top spot at the end of August and hadn’t let go. As long as they won 15 of their next 24 games, they would retain that lead and stamp their first trip to the postseason.

As a result of the team’s success and also by her own design, Kate was a very busy woman. There were some increased demands on her time at work, but she’d also returned to the Reid avoidance strategies she’d employed when he first arrived in Portland. She realized now – too late – that she should never have stopped avoiding him. Now he was under her skin again. If she was being honest, she would have to say he’d always been there. But now he was even deeper. His drunken visit had rattled her more than she wanted to admit to anyone – and not just because of the press attention.

The media had dropped the subject, but she was fielding questions from other sources – namely her family and a few friends. 

Jill called Kate one night to ask why she’d broken things off with Neal. Kate tried using the excuses about work and distance – the same ones she gave to Neal – but Jill pressed on.

“Neal seemed to think there was someone else,” Jill said. “And then that story about you and Reid came out …”

“There’s no one else,” Kate said. “I promise you. I don’t have time for anyone else. And there’s nothing going on with Reid.”

“You know, I know your history, so I was surprised when I heard you hired him,” Jill said.

“He knows baseball, and he’s a good hitting coach. That’s why I hired him,” Kate said. “That’s it.”

“Are you sure?” Jill asked. “I mean, I wouldn’t blame you if there were still some lingering feelings.”

“Oh, there are lingering feelings – mostly anger,” Kate said. “Seeing him has brought back memories of the way he just used me and left me.”

“But he was your first love, Kate,” Jill said. “You can’t tell me you don’t still have a little of that for him. And you told me about how hot you two were together. Aren’t you a little curious about if that’s still there?”

“No,” Kate said.

And she wasn’t curious. After the way he’d kissed her, she didn’t need to be. The heat between them was definitely still there. She hadn’t slept much after he left that night. Part of it was from the emotions and memories he’d stirred up, but there was more. Reid’s kiss had awakened parts of her that had been dormant for years – parts even Neal’s expert kisses hadn’t been able to rouse. And she hadn’t even been aware of it until his lips and tongue had coaxed them back to the surface. Her body had been buzzing with desire and the mere thought of that kiss still turned her on more than a kiss from any other guy. In fact, Reid’s kiss had affected her more than most of the sex she’d had since him. So, yes, there was certainly still plenty of heat between Kate and Reid, but she wasn’t about to let herself get burned again.

Even though she did not intended to explore things with Reid, she knew she had to break up with Neal. Staying with him wouldn’t be fair to him or her. She’d dropped the news on him in a phone call, which she realized made her just as bad as Reid. Neal had pleaded with her to give it more time and even suggested more frequent visits, but Kate knew that wouldn’t change anything and she told him as much. He finally stopped calling and texting, although she still wasn’t sure he’d accepted the break-up. She had a hard time accepting it too, and she hated that she had let Reid ruin this for her.

Thankfully, she only needed to avoid Reid for a few more weeks. She had already been looking into hiring a new hitting coach. It wasn’t that she planned to fire Reid. She certainly had grounds for it after the incident at her house, but she had opted not to exercise it to spare her own humiliation and any extra media speculation. She didn’t expect him to stay on as hitting coach, however. Reid’s agent had contacted her already to discuss his contract. Reportedly there were at least four teams interested in Reid’s services – as a player. Kate knew there was no way Reid would stay on as a hitting coach when he had a chance to play. As soon as the season was over, he would be out of her ballpark and her city. She just had to steer clear of him until then.

Her reprieve ran out when she arrived at the ballpark early for Fan Appreciation Day. He was just getting out of his Mercedes when she pulled into the parking garage. She took her time parking, hoping he would head on inside. Of course, that was not in Reid’s plans. As she got out of her white Audi, she saw him waiting near the elevator.

“Good morning,” he said. It sounded more like a question than a statement.

“Good morning,” she answered, keeping her tone even.

She pushed the button on the elevator, and her hand inadvertently brushed his arm.

“Kate, we need to talk,” he said.

“There’s nothing to talk about,” she said.

“I want to apologize again,” he said.

“I don’t want to hear it,” she said.

The elevator arrived, and she stepped on. Reid wasn’t about to let her escape. He scrambled into the elevator just before the doors shut, and Kate sighed in annoyance.

“You need to hear it,” Reid said. “I’m sorry about the way I handled things years ago. I had no idea it hurt you so much.”

Kate felt her whole body tense up. She hated that he had affected her then, and she especially hated that he affected her now. She wanted to say that, but she said nothing. She didn’t want to have this conversation, so she was fine letting it be a one-sided affair. Let him say what he needed to say and then he could just go away.

“A lot of things happened to me back then. I went through some tough times and I didn’t handle them very well.”

“Oh, and my life was a piece of cake,” she spat. So much for just letting him talk.

“Fair enough. But will you give me a chance to tell you?”

“I really don’t see the point. It won’t change anything.”

The elevator stopped on the floor where her office was. She stepped off without looking in his direction. He followed her down the hall and into her office, shutting the door behind him.

“You’re right. It won’t change anything. I can’t change what I did, but maybe you’ll understand why I did what I did.”

“I don’t want to understand,” she said.

She finally turned to face him as she spoke. She was determined to stare him down.

“I don’t want to understand what makes someone treat another person like that,” she continued. “I don’t want to understand why you thought it was okay to just toss me aside like I was no one. I’m not no one, Reid. I was not one of your little groupies. I deserved better than that.”

“I know you did, but you scared me,” Reid said.

“Scared you?” Kate asked. “What could I have possibly done to scare you?”

“You existed,” Reid said simply.

Kate frowned in confusion. “Are you drunk again?”

“Not at all,” Reid said.

“Well, you aren’t making any sense right now,” she said.

“I’m trying, trust me,” he said. “Here’s the deal, Katie. I decided a long time ago that I was never going to fall in love. It just messes up people’s plans and steals their dreams. I saw too many people get hurt.”

Kate could not disagree with that reasoning. She had experienced plenty of that.

“But then you happened,” Reid continued. “When you offered to tutor me in math, I had no idea I would start to like you so much. But you were so smart and nice and funny and beautiful. Damn it, the worst part is that you didn’t know you were any of those things. That just made me fall harder. When I kissed you that night after prom, I knew I was in danger of losing myself in you. That’s why I left without saying anything. I thought it would be easier.”

Kate just blinked, too stunned to speak. Plus, he was clearly not finished. Even though she’d been fighting this for weeks, she suddenly wanted to hear what else he had to say.