Double Blind (8 page)

We’re not fucking done, sweetheart. Not by a long shot.

She blind-sighted me at the restaurant. I didn’t get a chance to react to what she said. I’ve had a night to think about it, and I’ve decided that it’s all bullshit. She didn’t enjoy being with me? What about the time when I made her moan so loudly that the neighbor pounded on her bedroom wall? It wasn’t real, my ass.

We’re done when I say we’re fucking done.

I take a step forward, not sure whether I’ll kiss her or yell at her, but a man stops my path. Carmine, dressed in one of his preppy suits, blocks my way.

“Vince, good to see you.”

I tear my eyes away from her to look into his shit-brown eyes. “I can’t say the same.”

He laughs. “You are as charming as ever.” He holds out his hand expectantly.

Reaching into my jacket, I pull out the envelope stuffed with cash.

He takes it and thumbs through the contents.

Like I’d try to stiff him. Asshole.

“I heard you and Adriana were on the outs. Don’t think about talking to her right now. I don’t want any drama at my VIP games.”

Like you can fucking stop me. “It’s none of your fucking business.”

Suddenly, I feel someone touching the back of my neck and a female body pressing into my side. I turn into her arm, convinced it’s Adriana. She’s come back to her senses, finally. But no, it’s the fucking cocktail waitress. A flood of disappointment sends me crashing. I give her a strained smile and I step away.

A woman’s muffled cry makes my head turn. Adriana’s bends over the table with her head in her hands as her shoulders shake. The players look at each other uncomfortably as their dealer cries. They try to give her napkins, which she ignores.

What the fuck?

I don’t understand what just happened. Did one of the players say something?

Or is it because of me?

Some sick part of me can’t help but feel a little relieved that she might still care, but I feel it at the same time as the knife twists in my abdomen. I want to destroy whoever hurt her.

Carmine walks over there and touches her shoulder, his hands all over her as he whispers something in her ear.

Fuck you.

She gets up and disappears behind the Employees Only door. Carmine sits down at the table with a genial smile and quickly deals out cards.

“Sorry, folks. She just broke up with her fiancé, so she’s a little upset.”

“She’s single?” One of the guys leans in with a wide smile, joking.

Flames of heat shoot up my chest.

No, she fucking isn’t.

Carmine laughs. “Yeah, I guess so.” He clears his throat. “All right, guys. Here’s the river.”

After he finishes the game, he returns to my side. He has the balls to look pissed.

“Listen, Cesare, I think it’s best if we do our business somewhere else from now on. I can’t have you upsetting my dealer.”

I bristle. “Oh, she’s
your
dealer now, is she?”

He grins at my anger. “Yeah, she is. If you have a problem with that, take it up with Tony. From the look on her face, she doesn’t want you around, anyway.”

That strikes a nerve. I’m so close to smashing his face in. I can visualize my fist cracking over his skull, and kicking in his ribs when he’s on the ground.

“The only way we’ll have a problem is if you touch her again.”

His smile doesn’t falter. “You can fuck off with your attitude. I’ll do whatever the fuck I want with her. She’s not your fiancée, your
comare
, or anything. You have no authority over me, so you can shove your alpha-male posturing bullshit right up your ass.”

I’ll fucking kill you.

I know what he’s doing. He’s trying to piss me off, and he’s not even being subtle about it. Any decent wiseguy knows to stay the fuck away from another guy’s ex, except this asshole. I give him one last smile to let him know that I’m on to him, and then I turn my back on him.

I don’t know why the fuck he’s trying to rile me up, but I won’t let him get to me. I won’t.

I slam my fist into the double doors, making them fly open as I leave the VIP room.

* * *

The grimy windows block out most of the sun in the dimly lit deli. We’re holed up in the back, me and the guys. I’m trying to go through my books, looking down the list of names on the sheet of paper, which rests on the long, wooden table with a pastrami sandwich sitting on a plate next to me. Even though I only had a cup of coffee for breakfast, I have no taste for food. 

I came home this morning to see that Adriana cleared everything of hers out of the apartment.

What the fuck happened to us?

If I wasn’t tied up with work, I’d march over there and I’d drag her back to my place because none of this makes sense. She can’t just leave me on a whim, especially when I’m the only man standing between her and Jack’s wrath.

The guys shoot pool behind me, talking in low, hushed voices as if I’m on my deathbed. It makes me want to strangle someone. Nicky and Frank, two of my soldiers, keep shooting me sympathetic looks as I sit there. I don’t know how it got out, but everyone already knows that Adriana moved out. This fucking place is worse than a sewing circle. Fucking gossips.

“Vinny, There are plenty of other broads out there.”

None like her. No other woman has ever made me so fucking crazy. I look at the other guys’ wives and I don’t see what I’m missing. I never wanted a wife like that—I knew that I would cheat, but I never looked at any other women when we were together. Why would I?

“Fuck!” I shove the plate away and stand up.

The short man shrugs, still holding onto his pool cue. “I don’t understand it. She always looked happy when she was around you, especially after all that stuff with her mother.”

I narrow my eyes at Nicky, warning him to shut up. We can’t discuss that in front of anyone, especially when there might be a rat in my crew. Fuck, I completely forgot about it.

“Yeah, I don’t get it.”

One of the younger guys pushes himself off the wall. “Forget her, Vince. She’s a cunt.”

I look at him, feeling a hot surge of anger in my chest. “What the fuck did you say?”

He shrugs unconcernedly, not quite noticing the rancor in my voice. “She’s a cunt.”

He tries to raise his hands, his eyes round when I vault over the table. The guys scream at me.

“Vince, don’t!”

In a few seconds, I wrap my hands around the prick’s throat. He screams as I slam his head against the wall, choking off his yells.

“Stop! What the hell’s the matter with you?”

A hand clenches my shoulder, but I elbow it away. “Fuck off!”

“Vince, c’mon. That’s enough!”

The others hang around me, shouting in my ears as a faint white noise buzzes in my ear. The boy swings at me, and I let go of his neck long enough to bury my fist into his stomach. He doubles over, crying out in pain. Angry red marks wrap around his neck and a cold feeling slips down my stomach. My anger dissolves like dry ice.

What’s wrong with me?

“Vince, what the fuck?”

“
Jesus
.”

The guys grab my arms before I can do more damage. He writhes on the tiled floor and cries like a little bitch as I stand above him.

Frank gives me a wide-eyed look that makes me feel like a psycho.

What the fuck am I doing?

“
Jesus Christ,
Vince.”

I turn away from the crumpled boy, raising a shaky hand to my face. “Take him to the fucking hospital.” I reach into my pocket and grab a fistful of cash, cramming it into Nicky’s hand.

Then I walk outside to breathe.

I’m really losing it because of some broad. I feel out of control. Angry. Lost.

I need to focus on what’s important—the informant in my crew. I need to follow each of them. Jack still has no idea that the Feds talked to Adriana, and if Tony finds out, she’ll be dead for sure. She might want me out of her life, but she has no idea how much she needs me right now.

* * *

My car weaves in and out of traffic as I follow Paulie around New York. Tailing someone in this city isn’t easy, but it has to be done.

Someone’s been talking, and I need to find out who it is. After which, I’ll get permission from Jack to whack the son of a bitch.

Out of all of them, I suspect Paulie the least. The man is such a hardass for the rules. That’s why he was made captain. There are dozens of possibilities. The rat might not even be in my crew, he could be in the other captains’ crews. I have my work cut out for me, and not being able to talk about it with the others makes this even harder.

I pull up a block behind Paulie as he visits the laundromat. The laundromat, for God’s sake. He doesn’t even trust his
comare
to pick up his laundry, that’s how far his stick is up his ass.

This is useless. I would have to search his apartment to find out for sure. The feds might already know that I’m on to them. They probably are.

Fuck.

I start the car and pull away from the curb. Then I take the bridge towards Brooklyn.

I’m such a jerk-off for what I’m about to do.

Jack’s warning is stuck in my head, and I feel like I need to do something to warn her mother. I planned this days ago, but I got distracted with all this bullshit over Adriana. Seeing Adriana in tears at Carmine’s game reminded me of how horrible I’d feel if something happened to her mother. Even if that bitch did try to kill me.

After a smoldering drive across the Brooklyn Bridge, I park outside her shit-hole of a house. The brick steps are crumbling and the front lawn looks like a jungle. When I get out and march up to her front door, I don’t even bother knocking. I kick open the door and it flies inward easily, as if it’s been kicked in many times before.

“Oh, God! No!” Her voice screeches like a banshee.

My eyes burn as I step inside the house, almost as if I expect the whole place to be doused in piss. I snap my head towards the source of the scream and grab the woman fleeing the living room, and I hurl her back inside.

“Relax, I’m just here to visit.” I take a good look at her heavily bruised arms and legs. “Ah, shit.”

Mrs. Baldino cries when she recognizes me, pulling down her filthy shirt as if I might tear it off. “Don’t kill me!”

“Why so worried?” I ask her, leaning over her trembling body. “You haven’t been talking to anyone, have you?”

“No,” she moans.

A quick search of her eyes makes me nod in approval. “What are all those bruises from?”

She sits up. Jesus, she looks like shit. Her hair is overgrown, half of it blonde, the other half a dark brown. Her fingernails look picked raw.

“I thought you sent them.”

I set my mouth in a firm line. “No. I guess the Rizzos have been calling.”

She nods. “They want to know what happened to Richie and that other guy.”

“Oh, you mean the two guys you called over here to kill me?”

That makes her flinch.

Despite how much I despise her, I still feel a bit guilty looking at all those bruises covering her thin arms. Maybe because she reminds me a little of Adriana.

“Listen, you need to get out of town. The sooner, the better.”

She gives me a mournful look. “This is my home.”

“I’m sorry, did the bruises on your arms not give you a clue? They’re going to kill you soon if you don’t get out now. I can’t hold back Jack any longer.”

Her eyes well with tears. “Where am I supposed to go?”

Sighing, I reach into my pocket and grab a roll of cash. “Doesn’t matter. Just get out of here.”

“How’s Adriana?”

I look down at her, seeing her brown eyes swim with tears. I notice that her eyes are exactly the same shape and color of Adriana’s. This does not help.

“She’s all right.” I sink down to my knees and hand her the whole roll. “Get out of town. And buy yourself some fucking clothes.”

“Please take care of her for me,” she says in a watery sob. “
Please
, Vincent.”

For some reason, her grief hits me hard. A knot twists in my stomach and I bury it under a bristling sneer. “Why the fuck do you think I’m here?”

I stand up and walk out of there, too upset to stay there a moment longer. I can still hear her sobbing ringing in my ears, and it reminds me of myself, of my own grief over losing her.

I’m going to see her.

My mind is made up the moment I slip into my car. I’ll drive to her campus and break down her door if I have to, but we’re having a fucking chat. I’m not going to be able to sleep until I do. My car throttles back over the bridge as I drive towards Columbia.

When I park the car and walk through the campus, I remember when we first started dating. When I told her she would be better off marrying a
medigan
, but she wanted me anyway. My chest tightens when I think about it.

I wanted to fuck her the moment I met her, but I tried to keep a respectable distance because she was working for me, after all. And usually I fucked them and got tired of them. All of those girls from respectable, Vittorio family members bored the hell out of me. I was supposed to marry one of them and have kids. I suppose it would have been fine if I had
comares
on the side, but I watched my ma cry to herself so many times when she waited for my father to come home, knowing he was out drinking and whoring.

I couldn’t do that to a woman, so I resigned myself to a bachelor’s life.

Then I met her and she changed everything. The night I took her home, I was hooked. She was this incredibly sexy, headstrong girl, who would also drop to her knees at my command and let me do anything I wanted. Who let me fulfill my darkest fantasies.

And then I got to know her. She was so independent, so different from all the other girls. She didn’t care about jewelry. She didn’t want gifts. Adriana always told me they made her feel like a “kept woman.” Whatever the fuck
that
meant. Still, she would always smile when I got her something and thank me profusely. She just wanted to provide for her mother and finish her education. I admired that. She was loyal to a fault, even though it burned her at times.