Diane Warner's Wedding Question & Answer (24 page)

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Authors: Diane Warner

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Page 181
What kind off tips will we be expected to pay for all the services?
Unless the tip is already included in your caterer's bill, you will need to add 15 to 20 percent of the total. Also, expect to tip the parking attendants, coatroom attendant, and powder room attendants, if there are any. Finally, be prepared to tip the limo driver 10 to 15 percent.
When should I buy the marriage license?
Every state has different requirements, so your first step is to call the county clerk's office and ask how to proceed. You will need to know the length of the waiting period, whether a blood test is required, and what you need to bring in the way of identification. Make this call as soon as you become engaged because time has a way of sneaking up on you, and this is the most common last-minute snafu in couples' wedding plansputting the marriage license off until the last minute.
What are other types of marriage certificates that may be required?
Your church will probably provide a marriage certificate for you to sign, often a lovely memento suitable for framing. In the Jewish faith there is also a traditional
Ketubah
, the Orthodox or Conservative Jewish marriage contract that is an agreement spelling out the groom's responsibilities toward his bride. The Iranian wedding certificate contains the traditional Persian wedding covenant and is beautifully decorated with birds, flowers, and Islamic symbols. The Quakers, Amish, and Mennonites also have their own traditional marriage certificates, some of which are signed by all the guests present.
 
Page 182
What is a "wedding newsletter"?
This is a really trendy new thing to send out to everyone involved in the weddingthe members of the wedding party, family members, and close friends. It's a fun little letter that goes out periodically to keep everyone informed of the plans in progress, introduce them to each other by giving biographical sketches of each person, and tell them about hotel accommodations, airport shuttle services available, plans for the rehearsal dinner, and any special events or activities planned.
Is there some kind of short-term insurance we can buy that will cover our wedding gifts?
Yes, there is. You can purchase a rider to your existing homeowner's or renter's insurance policy that will protect the value of your wedding gifts. This rider is very affordable and provides great peace of mind.
What about "wedding insurance"?
Wedding insurance
covers nonrefundable expenses in case of a canceled wedding (heaven forbid!). It also covers such things as photography mishaps and personal liability should a guest be injured at the wedding or reception. Fireman's Fund Insurance Company has been providing these insurance policies for many years, but check with your favorite company and compare rates.
What is an "afterglow"?
An
afterglow
is another party; it may follow the reception or be held the next day. The purpose of this informal party is to entertain family and out-of-town guests;
 
Page 183
often the bride and groom attend this party (although I always wonder why they don't have something better to do!). Anyway, this informal gathering may include anything from a breakfast to a brunch to a barbecue around the pool to "High Tea in the Garden." It is a chance for everyone to relax and reminisce about the wedding.
What is a "guest basket"?
It is a basket made up ahead of time as a welcome gift for out-of-town wedding guests staying at hotels. Each basket contains a schedule of the wedding festivities, transportation arrangements, a map of the area, brochures on local places of interest, along with fresh fruit, a bottle of champagne or wine, and a personal note welcoming each guest.
 
Page 184
Chapter 21
The Honeymoon
In addition to money for the transportation, accommodations, and meals, what are the other funds we will need to badget for our honeymoon?
Allow for local transportation, entertainment, tips, mementos, impulse spending, and most important, a nice little emergency fund. Part of your emergency fund may be a few $100 bills folded away inside your wallet and the other part may be in the form of savings back home, accessible with your ATM card at your honeymoon destination. The biggest budget shock for most honeymooners is how fast they run out of the pocket money needed for tips, little gifts for each other, honeymoon mementos, and unexpected expenses.
What are the most popular honeymoon destinations?
Newlyweds traditionally love any destination with a beach, including Florida, Hawaii, Mexico, and the Caribbean.
 
Page 185
They also swarm to the couples-only honeymoon resorts, especially in the Poconos. Another choice is to take a cruise, with Mexican and Caribbean cruises being the most popular. Other popular destinations are Hilton Head Island, South Carolina, Las Vegas, San Diego, San Antonio, Disney World in Florida, and Vail or Breckenridge, Colorado.
We will only have a week for our honeymoon, but we have our hearts set on Hawaii Do you think a week will be long enough, with the travel time and all?
This is a matter of opinion, of course, but the only way I think it will work is if you're already on the West Coast. Even so, by the time you get to the airport, park your car, check in and make the five-hour flight from San Francisco to Hawaii, you've lost a whole day, which means that your seven days is already down to five by the time you settle into your hotel. Why not save the Hawaii trip for your first anniversary and honeymoon someplace closer to homesay, no more than a three- or four-hour
drive
to your destination?
This wedding is costing us a fortune, especially since our parents are going through financial problems right now and aren't able to help us, which means we will have to squeeze our honeymoon out of whatever money we have left over. Any suggestions?
For less than $600 you can rent or borrow a self-contained RV and park it alongside a lake or stream, or your state probably has some quiet, romantic spot where you can rent a little cabin or stay at a bed-and-breakfast. For about $1,000 you can do something a little more exotic, depending on where you live. If you live in Arizona or Southern California, for example, you can afford a three-night cruise out of Los Angeles with stops at Catalina, Ensenada,
 
Page 186
and Cabo San Lucas, or if you live in the Southeast and can drive to Miami, there are also short, affordable cruises available to the Caribbean. The Poconos also offer total honeymoon packages for less than $1,000, depending on how many nights you stay. You may want to pick up a copy of my book
How to Have a Fabulous, Romantic Honeymoon on a Budget
, which has hundreds of other affordable honeymoon ideas. In any case, remember this important fact: It's
who
you're with that counts and any destination looks pretty good when you're filled with that "newlywed love."
What's so great about the Poconos? I've heard about them for years
.
The resorts located in the Pocono Mountains of Pennsylvania, as well as the other couples-only destination resorts around the country and in the Caribbean, cater to honeymooners. These resorts absolutely drip with sensuality, with their deep, heart-shaped Whirlpool tubs, private swimming pools, velvet-draped canopied beds, candlelit dinners, and romantic musical entertainment. The packages are all-inclusive, which means that everything is included in one price, such as the lodging, food, entertainment, and dozens of activities and amenities. Call 1-800-POCONOS for free honeymoon information.
What do we do if we should lose our airline tickets during our honeymoon?
One precaution would be to book with one of the airlines now offering "ticketless flying." That way you have nothing to lose in the first place. Otherwise, contact the travel agent or airline through which you made the reservations. It may (1) reissue new tickets or (2) require that you purchase new tickets until you5for a refund after you return from the trip.
 
Page 187
We would like to find a romantic destination for our honeymoon that we can have all to oarselves, without thousands of other honeymooners everywhere we look. Do you have any suggestions?
Well, if you like the outdoors and your idea of a romantic setting is watching the setting sun reflect on the lake in front of your secluded log cabin, you might want to consider a wilderness honeymoon. Some of the national parks offer incredible honeymoon settings, such as Jenny Lake or Jackson Lake in the Grand Teton National Park in Wyoming, or you may want to consider a remote guest ranch, such as those hidden away in the mountains of Colorado. Pick up a copy of Gene Gilgore's
Ranch Vacations
for specific destinations.
What are some other ways we can save money on our honeymoon?
The best way by far is to establish a gift registry at a travel agency. That way your friends and relatives can contribute toward your honeymoon in lieu of a wedding gift. Another idea is to rent a condo, private home, RV, or houseboat at your destination, instead of a pricey hotel. You'll have more room and privacy for half the price. When it comes to meals, there are several ways to save: Make lunch your main meal of the day, rather than dinner; eat off the appetizer menu instead of the regular menu; take a picnic to some secluded, romantic spot (be sure to register for a picnic basket and insulated cooler when you're setting up your gift registries); split a meal once in a while (a Mexican fajita, a pizza or a Chinese meal, for example); fill up for free at a happy hour buffet where the food is free for the price of a couple of drinks; and, finally, look for hotels, motels, and, of course, bed-and-breakfasts, where the breakfast is included in the price.
 
Page 188
What is the most affordable honeymoon you've ever heard of?
Well, other than a free honeymoon through a travel agency gift registry, the most affordable idea is to honeymoon at home. This takes some very creative planning, such as:
Tell everyone you're flying to Hawaii for your honeymoon.
Don't tell a
soul
you're honeymooning in your own apartment or homenot even your parents, best man, or maid of honor!
A few days before the wedding, stock your home with plenty of food (preferably prepared food) and drinks, paper plates, cups, plastic champagne glasses, candles (lots and lots of them!), romantic CDs and tapes, bubble bath, massage oil, a
huge
supply of sheets and towels, fresh strawberries, several boxes of chocolates, your favorite cologne and perfume, and a few dozen movies on video (not that you'll
really
watch them, of course).
Bring packed suitcases with you to the reception that can be placedin full view of your guestsinto the trunk of your getaway vehicle to convince them that you're really flying off somewhere!
Be sure you aren't followed home after your reception. If necessary, head for the airport and stay on that route until you've ditched the last of the wedding party who may be following you.
Once you're home, hide your car in the garage, unplug the telephone and don't answer the door
no matter what!
 
Page 189
We're worried about our luggage getting lost by the airlines; is it safer to check it curbside at the airport or inside at the airline's ticket counter?
Industry-wide, only four bags are mishandled for every 1,000 passengers, but I can't find statistics on whether these four bags were checked at curbside or at the counter. To minimize your risk of loss in any case, here are some rules to follow:
Be sure your bags are tagged well with your name, address, and telephone number. Tear off all other tags from previous trips.
Make copies of your itinerary and place one
inside
each piece of luggagethat way your bags have a better chance of catching up with you at your honeymoon destination.
Make sure the three-letter airport code placed on your bag corresponds with your destination.
What if the airline loses our luggage after all?
Fill out a lost-luggage form with the airline at its customer service office at the airport; most lost luggage isn't really lost at all, only delayed, and will probably arrive on the next flight from your origination city. You may want to hang around the airport and wait for that flight in the hopes that your luggage will be there; otherwise, you can go ahead to your hotel and the airlines will have your luggage delivered directly to you as soon as it does arrive. Even with all the flying I've done through the years, an airline has never lost my luggage for goodit has always come in on a later flight. Meanwhile, it's smart to carry as much luggage on board as the airline allowsusually one medium suitcase or garment bag per person, plus one smaller case or bag. Be sure your on-board luggage carries all the

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