Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend (17 page)

“Scarlet, I love you. I will always love you. You’re mine and I’m yours. Now and always. I will
never
forsake you. Never leave you stranded. Through thick and thin, I’ll be here.”

Scarlet

I felt so warm. So…safe. I stirred and felt a firm hand wrapped over my waist. I turned my head slightly and saw Dax spooned behind me and his face buried in my hair.

I turned back and thought about what today would bring. It was her funeral. How could I say good-bye to the one person who has been there for me through thick and thin? How do I get passed this? Nana was gone. Never would I see her laughing, teasing smile. Never would I be comforted by her motherly embrace again. Never, never, never. Why was letting go so hard to do? I didn’t know her long enough. Yes, two decades was a long time, but what does a little girl know of life? How am I supposed to cope with the fact that I don’t have anyone? Save Dax, of course. Nana wasn’t old.

Cancer. Taken by breast cancer. When they had come and took her from her room, I didn’t know, but Dax must’ve found her personal doctor’s number. She came to the house and told me Nana had been diagnosed with Stage IV, Metastatic Cancer. She had been in remission. It had come back and she refused to take the medications. The doctor said she was surprised Nana lived as long as she did without treatment.

Was that what Nana had tried telling me a few days before Christmas?

That she really wanted me to let Dax in. Was my grandmother really trying to pimp me out? No, but I’m glad she gave me that nudge. It was the night I lost my virginity.

Was my grandmother trying to tell me time was wasting? That she wouldn’t be here much longer and to tell Dax how I really felt?

What did I feel for Dax? Was it love? Do I know what that even is? What do I know of love? I know of a grandmother who tried to mother me. I know that love. She did it perfectly. What the hell do I know about a man’s love? He staked his claim on me and I was thrilled I could be called his but was that love?

He told me he loved me the day Nana died. Was he trying to just pacify me because tragedy collapsed?

Before Dax had come over for dinner that first time, Nana sat me down and described her love with Grandpa. It sounded beautifully intense and magical. Told me how he spoke to her like she was the living, breathing entity that made his life worth living. Spoke her name like a scripture. With meaning, love, hope and absolute truth.

“When the man who loves you says your name like he can’t live without you, you’ll know it’s more than a season coming into your life. There’s a permanence in your name that when he speaks it, it’s like truth. The spoken Word. Indelible. Cherish that, Scarlet. We only get one life on this earth. Love with all your heart. Even when you want to strangle him. Just remember that love. Love remains true and pure when all else fails. It doesn’t lose. It never refuses. It’s always there, surrounding you, wrapping you in its embrace. You see, my sweet baby-girl, our life is like a book. Each chapter represents the days we are given and when it’s that final chapter, at the end of your life, you’ll know the life you led had purpose. When your mother dropped you off, I was lost. Things were happening that I couldn’t control. Until you. You brought a light into my darkness, Scarlet. Be strong. Have faith.”

She was leading me. Telling me that our time together was numbered. Why is life so damn hard to live?

“Baby, deep breaths.”

I shifted my head back and said, “What?”

Dax lifted himself up a little and turned me so I was now facing him. He brought my body in close to his, and inserted one hard thigh between my legs.

“Scarlet, you’re having a panic attack.”

Was I? I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply, trying to find some sort of peace. I kept breathing in the masculine scent of Dax. His warmth seemed to wrap around me. To encompass me. He was my balm.

“It’s her funeral today.”

He lifted his hand and brushed my hair back gently and curled it around my ears.

“Yes. I know. I’ll be there. Every step of the way. You know I will.”

I nodded. I knew he would be there for me. He’s never seen me this way before.
I’ve
never seen myself this way before. I’ve never had something ripped away before. Maybe when my mother left, that felt like abandonment, but I don’t remember ever crying for her. Right now, my heart felt cracked open. Splintered with Nana’s passing. With Dax by my side, he was slowly putting me back together.

That’s how he’s been the past few days. He said he called his work and told them he wasn’t coming in this week. Nice to know he had that kind of leeway. I was able to tell Danny about Nana’s passing and she sent her condolences but did ask when I was planning on coming back to work. Since it was Monday, I told her I’d be there Thursday. Why take time off when I knew if I did I’d be wallowing and dwelling on Nana’s death? I needed to work and get my mind off things. Especially since I wouldn’t be living here much longer. I needed to start looking for a place.

I knew how Dax could find another way to distract me. I was grateful he was being sweet, and considerate, but he hadn’t touched me like I knew he wanted to. With intense and relentless ardor. He’s been taking care of me like I was going to break.

For goodness sake, I already did. I was catatonic when I found her. If Dax hadn’t shown up, I have no idea what I would’ve done.

“Scarlet. Tell me what I can do for you.”

After the funeral, Nana’s lawyer had requested an audience with me to go over her will and testament.

“You’re doing it, Declan. You’re right here. Right where I want you. So close to me. I don’t know how I’m supposed to cope with this. I’ve never lost someone. Nana was…she was always there.”

“Now I’ll always be here for you. I promise.”

“Declan?”

“Yeah, Pixie?”

Pixie…his nickname for me was growing on me.

“Make love to me.”

The hand that was caressing me stopped suddenly. I looked into his clear blue eyes as his became clouded with uncertainty but underneath, a hope and lust I was hoping he was ready to ignite.

“Are you sure? I know this isn’t a good-

“Declan. I need to feel something other than numb right now. I want to go to that funeral and know my life isn’t over. Make me disappear and feel something other than sorrow. Just for minute. I understand if it’s-

“Scarlet, your life is only just beginning. And baby, I love loving up on you, anytime, anyplace, anyhow. Sorry to tell you this, Pix, but it’ll be longer than a minute.”

I laughed. Sometimes, he knew just what to say to make me smile.

“So…it’ll be five.”

He rolled his eyes, then his lips took mine in a kiss that shifted my universe off its axes. His hands swept down over my body until they hooked into my pajama shorts and panties. He hurried them down. Not roughly, but with a swift quickness, only a type of guy like him knew how to do.

I wasn’t expecting what came next, but he had disappeared under the sheets and I felt his lips kiss a path up my inner thigh, and he placed a solo kiss above my mound before he spread the hood of my vagina wide and with the thick pad of his tongue, licked a path from my entrance to my clit. He sucked my clitoris into his mouth and I felt my body lift up as a hiss escaped my lips.

His strong hand found purchase on my tummy and pressed me back down. His lips sucked a bit of flesh inside and my inner walls flexed. When his other hand started circling my opening in gentle circles, I felt myself begin to writhe against him. He was so beautifully strong.

I loved how he made me wet for him before he slid two fingers inside me.

“Yes. Oh, Declan.”

I knew his first name was a sore spot for him, but the first time we made love and I accidently screamed out his first name, he told me to always call him that when I came and any other time I wanted to. That hearing it from my lips was a beautiful sound. I knew I was the only person that was allowed to call him that and not get a sound-lashing.

His mouth kissed my nub before he suddenly released me. He shoved the covers off and looked right at me. I was beginning to see exactly the look Nana described to me. Dax did look at me like I was the only thing in his world.

“Come in my mouth, Pixie. I want to taste every bit of you.”

Then he buried his face, taking my pleasure higher. Making quicker flicks of his tongue and scissoring his fingers inside me. He wasn’t much of a talker during the act. He was really intense and concentrated on each and every feeling. For him and myself. He never stopped until I was fully satisfied.

A few more sucking and biting of his lips on my clit and I was calling out his name as I came. My taste flooded his mouth, and he took it hungrily; drinking from my body with abandon. My body convulsed around his fingers.

After my orgasm was spent, he licked me once more, sending a thrill throughout my entire body before shifting his body over mine. My hands were gripped tightly in the sheets and I set them free before I hurried to divest myself of my tank top. As soon as the material cleared my head, his lips sealed on mine.

I could taste my release on his lips and somehow that was wicked sexy. I gripped his biceps before skating them over his shoulders, scratching over his shoulder blades and finding themselves a home in his hair. I pulled him closer to me and kissing somehow wasn’t enough. His mouth traveled over my jaw and with my feet, I pushed at the lounge pants he was wearing.

Monkey toes? I had them. Commando? Thank God. I pushed them down as far as I could and he hastened to get rid of the confining material.

His mouth found the curve of my neck and he sucked my skin between his lips as the thick rod between his legs found my opening. Wet, willing and so ready for him.

After leaving what was probably a hickey on my neck, he leaned up with one hand on the side of my head, the other drifting over my writhing body until he cupped the back of my knee. He lifted it high at the same time he thrust himself all the way until he was seated fully inside of me.

My eyes momentarily closed because this position made me feel so
taken
. It’s like I’ve never felt so full before. It was like each time we came together was a new experience. Of course with my limited history, it was. With my leg lifted and opened to the side where he could push himself further inside me felt amazing. My inner walls clutched at his erection like a silk vise.

Dax hissed at the new pleasure I was giving him. He slid out of my sheath where just the hard tip was playing with my opening before he pushed his cock hard and deep.

“You feel so good around my dick, Scarlet. So fucking tight. All for me. So slick and sensitive. So beautiful.”

Our love making was passionate and sweet. He kept his eyes on mine as he thrust slow and steady. Willing me to take him deeper. At least, that was what I thought. It felt so intimate to stare at him as we pleased each other. I had thought couples closed their eyes and only had sex in the dark. Dax told me whenever I wanted it, all I had to do was tell him and he would make it happen.

I never thought about another guy because Dax set the bar so high. I wasn’t even curious. I wanted to believe I was falling hard for Dax. I’m pretty sure I already fell, but I wasn’t willing to admit it to him that I loved him. Not yet. I was too chicken to broadcast my feelings out like that. Maybe too many repressed feelings.

Did he really love me? Like…forever and ever love? Was I ready to tell someone I loved them? I don’t know, but I knew without a doubt that Dax was a part of my life. And my heart.

I was also curious about those toys he had in his trunk at the end of the bed. He told me one day we’d play and see what I liked. I read about couples using crops, or floggers, I tried telling him we could experiment, but he just shook his head and told me I wasn’t ready for that yet.

“Scarlet?”

My mind burst back into the present and out of my mind.

“Yes?”

“Focus.”

Dax swiveled his hips hard and ground his pelvis against mine, creating a tantalizing friction that made my eyes roll back and my breath hasten. I was spiking, my body began this intense feeling of fluttering wildly in my womb and each surge he stroked inside hit that delicate spot that every woman knew about but probably has never felt before.

His lengthy rod pounded my g-spot with blow after blow. My heart raced. My hands clutched into the inky tresses on the back of his head and I pulled him down to me as I called out his name.

“Declan!”

“That’s it, Scarlet. Say my name just like that. Your pussy is so fucking warm over my dick. Coating it with your slick, juicy heat. Are you ready for me? You ready for my cum shooting deep inside of you?”

“Don’t you ever have a filter?”

“Nope.”

“Then yes, Declan. Dear God, please, yes.”

The words came out of my mouth with a groan as my release spilled forth and my body writhed and trembled underneath his steely strength. One of his hands had found its way to mine and he brought it to the side of my head, entwining our fingers together.

I loved feeling Dax above me. I lifted my legs higher, my thighs cupping his hips and my heels anchored just below the curve of his buttocks.

With a harsh moan, he held himself still and I felt his release pour out of him. His face was tight with pleasure. Jaw locked as he thrust slowly before collapsing on top of me. His weight was a welcoming warmth. His face found the curve of my neck and I heard him whispering something and felt it against my skin.