Destined (15 page)

At the same time, her heart soared at her feeling of connection to Blake. There was so much left unsaid between them. And she had no idea where to begin. On the one hand, she felt disloyal to Caleb to even talk to Blake. But at the same time, it seemed like Caleb was no longer here.

Polly looked back and forth between the two of them, each staring at the other, and seemed to grow uncomfortable.

“Caitlin,” she said, “I think you and I should go home now. It’s almost five. Most everyone’s left already.”

Caitlin nodded, but did not say anything, unable to peel her eyes away from Blake’s. He was so gorgeous, so perfect, so sculpted, his chiseled jaw standing against his perfect skin. His dark brown eyes shone, looking at her with an energy she had never felt.

“Actually, if you don’t mind, I’d like to accompany her for a while,” Blake said.

Polly began to protest, but he quickly added, “Don’t worry—I’ll bring her back safe and sound.”

“Caitlin?” Polly asked. “Is that what you want?”

Is that what I want?
she thought. It was what she wanted more than anything. In fact, at that moment, she could not imagine herself anywhere else but with him. She felt as if she didn’t even have a choice. Like she didn’t
want
to have a choice.

“Yes,” was all Caitlin, finally, managed to say.

“Do you know where we live?” Polly asked, ever the protective friend.

Blake nodded back. “Of course. Everyone does. Isola di San Michele.”

Polly still seemed reluctant to walk away.

Finally, Blake stepped forward, and held out an open palm to Caitlin.

Caitlin hesitated just a beat, and then reached out and placed her palm in his.

Caitlin sat in the gondola, as Blake stood on the bow behind her, gently rowing them through the small, narrow canals in the inner city of Venice. It was so late now, the city seemed asleep, completely silent and getting darker by the moment, as more and more street torches extinguished.

The only thing left to light the night was the large moon above, and the occasional burning candle in a window sill. Caitlin could only hear the slight lapping of the water against her boat, the sounds of Blake’s wooden oar cutting through the water. It was so peaceful, so romantic.

This was a whole different Venice, one Caitlin hadn’t yet seen. It was quiet and empty. This was the inner Venice, the narrow canals that cut through the heart of the inner-city, twisting and turning, just like the alleyways did, but on water. Every hundred feet or so, she and Blake would have to duck so as not to hit their heads on a small, stone footbridge. The canals were so narrow, there was barely room for two gondolas to fit side-by-side.

Caitlin looked up as they went, and saw the crumbling interiors of the homes built on the city.

They all had doors that opened right onto the water, and most had their own gondolas tied to posts.

High above, clothes hung on lines everywhere. This was the quiet interior of Venice, where the locals lived. It felt ancient.

Caitlin wondered what Blake was thinking as they rode together in silence. He was one of the most silent men she had ever met, and it was always hard for her to tell what he was thinking. They had been quiet together for so long. On the one hand, she had a million questions she was burning to ask him; but on the other, strangely enough, she felt very comfortable with him just like this, in the silence. She didn’t really feel a need to talk around him in order to be comfortable, and she could tell that he didn’t, either. She thought back to their time on Pollepel, of how silent he been then.

Nothing had really changed. Centuries could pass, but people were who they were.

Which was all right with her. She was just thrilled to be with him, to be taking this ride. She closed her eyes, breathed in the saltwater air, and tried to freeze the moment. A moonlit, gondola ride in Venice. What more could she ask for?

Finally, though, some questions burned to the forefront of Caitlin’s mind, and she just had to ask them. She took a deep breath, hoping that she wouldn’t ruin the moment.

“How much do you remember?” Caitlin asked, finally.

The question hung in the air for what seemed like forever, so long that Caitlin began to wonder if he had heard it, if she had even asked it.

Finally, his response came: “Enough.”

Caitlin wondered what that meant. That was Blake. He was always so cryptic, never saying more than he had to. “Do you remember Pollepel?” she asked.

Again, a silence. Then, finally: “I wouldn’t call it remembering,” he said. “It’s more like looking into the future. Looking into a life that would have been. I see it, intellectually. But I haven’t experienced it.”

“Then…” Caitlin paused. “Can you see our time together?”

He paused. “Some of it,” he said. “It’s more like an impression. I have an impression of you from another time that is very strong. The details, though…are hazy. I think they’re meant to be.

After all, we need to start fresh each time, don’t we?”

“And what is your impression?” she asked.

She couldn’t see him, as he stood behind her, rowing, but she thought, in the silence, that she could hear him smile. “Very positive,” he said.

Then he added, “They say that there are certain people we are destined to see again and again, in every lifetime, in every place….I feel that with you.”

Caitlin knew exactly what he meant. She felt it, too. It wasn’t a matter of love. It was something stronger. Destiny. Fate. Inevitability. Being
meant
to be with a person, whether you liked it or not. It was that magical moment when the universe
forced
paths to cross, overrode anyone’s option of free will. It was that one moment in life when free will was forced to submit to something even bigger, more important. Destiny. And that, she felt, was even bigger than love. Love, she felt,
true
love, she could only have with one person in one lifetime, and that was something she could choose. But
destiny
—she felt that she could have a destiny with many people, and that she wouldn’t have a choice.

She was afraid to ask the next question, her heart pounding.

“Did you know I would be here tonight?” she asked.

There was a long silence. Finally, he said: “Yes. That’s why I came.”

“Are we destined to be together in this lifetime?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” he said. “But I do know that I want to be with you.”

As they turned a corner, the small canal opened up into the huge grand canal. The lagoon spread out before them, its clear blue waters obscured in a mist that hung over everything, making the moonlit glow surreal.

Caitlin’s mind reeled. Her emotions were taking over, and she was having a hard time remembering why she’d come back to this time to begin with. It was getting harder and harder to think of Caleb. She had been so set on finding him. But now, she felt certain, more certain than ever, that he just wasn’t here. So then why had she come? Was she meant, instead, to find Blake? To be with him?

Blake pulled the boat up alongside the dock, tied it down, and sat beside her. Dawn was breaking, the sky beginning to light up in a medley of colors.

She turned and faced him, happy to be able to look at him finally.

“Time is such a precious thing,” he said. “It feels like it lasts forever, but it doesn’t. Life twists and turns so fast. One minute we may be together, and the next minute, separated forever.”

She thought about that, and realized he was right.

“It’s ironic,” she said, “that for such an immortal race as ours, time is the one thing we never seem to have enough of.”

He stared at her with a burning intensity, and she stared back, overwhelmed by her own emotion.

“I live in a palace in the countryside,” he said. “I want you to come with me.”

Caitlin didn’t know what to say. She was speechless. Her heart pounded in her chest, and she felt her mouth go dry. She didn’t have the strength to say no. She felt as if she were standing outside of herself, watching it all happen, that she was just a helpless passenger in the ride.

Blake suddenly leaned forward, and she knew that he was coming in to kiss her. Her world became dizzy, and she froze. She closed her eyes.

And then, a second later, she felt his soft lips touching hers.

And that was when she heard the noise.

They both suddenly broke the kiss and turned at the same time.

There, walking along the pier, was a young couple, swinging a child between them. The child practically bounded with joy against the breaking sky, and both parents’ seemed radiant. They were heading towards a boat, just a few feet away from Caitlin and Blake, and as they got there, the father turned and looked their way.

Caitlin’s heart stopped.

The man must have been struck by the sight of Caitlin, too, because his huge grin suddenly dropped, and he let go of the child’s hand slowly, as he turned and stared right at her.

The woman standing beside him, a tall redhead, turned and stared at Caitlin, too.

Blake, surprised and not understanding, looked back and forth between the two of them.

Caitlin’s world had just turned upside down.

There, standing just a few feet away, was Caleb.

Caitlin leaned back in the small boat, looking out at the breaking sky of dawn, and wished the world would end. As they headed further out into the Grand Canal, no land in sight, all she could see was water—and a part of her wished that she could just keep going, never stop, into the horizon, and off the face of the earth. She was so sad, so confused…she just wanted to curl up and die.

She had never felt so alone. The person rowing the boat was not Blake, or Caleb, but a complete stranger, a gondola driver that she had found at the pier, who she’d hired to bring her back to Polly’s island. Luckily, Polly had given her money earlier in the night, in case anything happened.

Blake had insisted on at least taking her home, but she had refused. Her feelings for him were too strong, and after seeing Caleb, she couldn’t bear to be in a boat with him for one more second.

She needed a chance to sort out her feelings, to try to process it all.

The irony was that, if they hadn’t run into Caleb at precisely that moment, Caitlin felt sure that she would still be in a gondola with Blake, maybe on the way, right now, back to his palace. They would probably have had a beautiful night, one which she would have never forgotten, no matter how long she lived. If she hadn’t had run into Caleb at that moment, she may have even spent the rest of her life with Blake.

But clearly that was not meant to be. It just wasn’t destined.

No. At that exact moment, at the exact second that Blake’s lips touched hers, at the moment she had finally given up on finding Caleb, destiny had to have Caleb cross her path. He had been out for an early morning boat ride, with his wife, and their son. They had been up early, the eager boy, anxious to get out on the boat, to take a morning ride.

Why had she had to notice him? And why had he had to notice her? And why did it all have to happen at the exact moment when Blake’s lips touched hers? Not only did she now feel more confused than ever about Blake, but she now also felt like a traitor to Caleb, like she had done something terrible. Did life have to be so cruel?

When she first spotted Caleb, after overcoming her shock, her guilt at kissing Blake, her first feeling had been joy, overjoyed to see the Caleb was alive, and in this place and time. She had jumped out of Blake’s boat without thinking, nearly tipping it over, and had run across the pier, right towards him, and had stopped herself just a foot away.

She had stared up at him, and he had stared back down at her. At first, she could have sworn she saw something like recognition flicker across his face.

But a second later, his face contorted to something like bewilderment. He continued to stare at her, but it wasn’t the stare of a lover, or even of a friend. It was the stare of someone who might have met you once, but who couldn’t figure out who you were.

“Who’s that, Daddy?” the boy, maybe ten, had asked, tugging at Caleb’s sleeve.

Caleb had ignored him, staring at Caitlin. Finally, Caleb, still looking at Caitlin, had said, “I don’t know, Jade.”

Caitlin could tell from his voice, from his demeanor, that he really, truly, didn’t know. And that was what had hurt her more than anything, hurt her worse than if she had been killed a million times. Here she was, she had come all the way back in time just for him, had put her life on the line, had lost their child together—and all for what?

On the one hand, it had worked—he was alive and well in another time. For that, she felt a huge sense of relief.