Defiance (New Adult Romance) (Isaac & Maya) (22 page)

29

Maya

I’ve been avoiding my mother’s phone calls for months. I’ve barely spoken to her at all since I fell in love with Isaac, and though I’d never admit it out loud, I like it better that way. But when someone calls you five times in a row, you have to pick up, especially if that someone is your mom.

“Hello?”

“Maya…” her voice quakes through the phone. It sounds like she’s been drinking. “Tanya’s dead.”

“What?”

“
My baby sister is dead!
” she exclaims, infusing her words with as much drama as possible. Isaac hears it and gets up from the couch, wordlessly asking if he can lean in to listen.

“How did she die?”

“They don’t know,” my mother wails, sobbing. “Her boyfriend found her dead on the kitchen floor last night.”

“Who?” Isaac mouths silently.

“My aunt Tanya,” I whisper back. “Are they doing an autopsy?” I ask.

“I don’t know nothin’!” she yells. Yeah, she’s definitely hammered and it’s only nine in the morning. I hope my baby brother isn’t around. “Nobody’s telling me
nothin.’
You know how they all treat me.”

They treat you like the insane bitch that you are.
“Yeah, I know,” I say soothingly. “Do you want me to call uncle Dean?”

“No! Absolutely not, you stay out of it. They’re already
wondering about how they’re gonna pay for the service and I told ‘em that you and Luke are on the rocks and not to bother even asking.” Oh. So that’s what this is about. “Don’t you worry about it,” she says before she starts sobbing again.

I haven’t really heard her get upset since I’ve been in this late life emotional puberty, as Piper calls it. Something’s off in her voice, in her crying. It’s so over the top and she dropped it way too fast. I know what crying is now, I know hysteria and you can’t control it. If I was calling my family to tell them my little brother was dead, I’d be frantic. Though, to be fair, I haven’t spent the last twenty years hating him. “I’m sorry about your sister, Mom.”

“We were so close in the last couple of years. At least I have that.”
Really? Because as of last Christmas, you still weren’t speaking.
“Honey, maybe some good can come of this. Maybe you could tell Luke that you’ve lost your aunt and that you need to see him.”
You mean see his money?
“You have to come down for the funeral and you have to bring Garrett.”

“But we have school and—”

“
Moriah,
” she growls. My spine stiffens and it feels like I’m shrinking. I hate when she calls me that. “You have to come. We are family and family needs to be together when we lose someone.”

“Okay,” I whisper automatically. Isaac rests his hand on the small of my back and kisses my temple.

“And call Luke to let him know what happened,” she sobs. It sounds so fake. How did I never hear it before? “He’s family too.”

“No, he’s not. I can’t call him, he’s seeing someone else.”

“He’s what?” she snarls. “How could you let that happen? What were you thinking?”

“It just happened.”

“Did he leave you or did you leave him?”

“I left him.”

“All those years at those fancy schools…” she huffs. “And for what?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Oh, I bet you are.”

“Tell her about me,” Isaac whispers.

“I left him for someone better,” I murmur, my lips trembling.

“Let me guess, for someone who
loves
you,” she mocks me.

“Yes,” I say, cringing as she laughs at me.

“Did you not learn
anything
from how hard my life was? Do you not remember the way it was for us when you were little?”

“I do. I’m not stupid. He’s got money too, and he’s nicer.”

“Oh,” she says, her mood brightening. “Well why haven’t we heard about him yet?”

“Because it’s new and I don’t want to jinx it.”

“How new?”

“Um…” I stammer as Isaac whispers the right timeframe into my ear. “Five mon
ths.” It’s really closer to nine.

“That’s not new,” she squeals. “Honey, if it’s really serious, he’ll want to see you through this.” See me through what? I’ve met Tanya all of four times that I can remember. “This is a good test to see how much he cares. Ask him if he wants to come with you.”

You mean ask him if he’ll fit the bill.
“I’ll tell him what happened.”

“Call me back soon, sweetheart,” she coos. “Let me know if you’re alright.”
I don’t even know her!!!

“Did you tell Garrett?”

“I’m calling him next. Unless you think you should?”

“No, he should hear it from you,” I say, even though Garrett’s only met Tanya once.

“I love you, Maya,” she says, her voice cracking.

“Love you too, Mom.”

“I thought your mom hated all of her sisters,” Isaac says when I hang up the phone.

“She does. Tanya most of all.”

“Then what’s up with all the crying?”

“I don’t know… she always gets upset when everyone else does.”

“Huh.” His brow furrows. “So, I guess we’re going to a funeral.”

“No, we’re not,” I reply. “Why did you want me to tell her that I met someone?”

“She called Luke the last time she heard you two were fighting, didn’t she?”

“Yes.”

“Well, I don’t want that to happen again and if it does, I want her to mention me, well, the fake me anyway.”

“I’m still not going to that funeral.”

“But you told her you would.”

“I’ll come up with an excuse. She used to lie to me all the time,” I say, walking away from him as I start to seethe. I’m not even ready to think about my mother, let alone actually see her.

“Maya… We need to handle this very carefully.”

“It’s one thing to start a rumor that I’m dating someone else, it’s another thing for you to go down there and actually pretend to
be
someone else.”

“If you’re mother needs money and—”

“She always needs money,” I snap. “That’s all she fucking thinks about.”

“If she’s unstable and wants to see that you’re with someone who cares about you—”

“She definitely doesn’t give a shit if you
care
, Isaac.”

“Well if love equals money for her, then yes she does. The last thing we need is her contacting Luke because you’re new boyfriend doesn’t ‘
care’, Maya.”

“Great. She doesn’t need the money, Isaac, she’s under no obligation to pay for any of this and she
despised
Tanya for screwing my real father. She just wants to bring it to the table so she looks better than everyone else.”

“Well—” He stops himself from saying something.

“Just spit it out.”

“I don’t know what to do,” he whispers. “If throwing her a few grand gives her an ego boost and keeps her quiet… Fuck! Do you think she’ll call him?”

“Why is it a big deal if she does?”

“Because I fucked up when I fucked
him
up, Maya. I sent a message, a message that needs to stay consistent. If I cared enough about you to maim your ex, paying for your aunt’s funeral is a given.”

“Don’t you mean
James
sent a message?” I remind him.

“Yeah, I guess I do.”

“He doesn’t even know he’s involved.”

“James isn’t involved. All my father knows is that Luke dug his own grave when he overstepped his boundaries and attacked the love interest of someone who works for Glory, who asked my dad to drop it and he did. All Luke knows is that he’ll lose his job if he even thinks about contacting you again. I just want to keep it that way.”

“Fine. Then let’s just send her a check and our regrets that we can’t attend.”

“You’re sure you don’t want to go? You haven’t seen your mom for over a year.”

“I don’t want to go down there,” I say, my voice shaking as I start to lose my grip on the pain and anger. “I don’t care if I never see her again.”

“Okay.” Isaac steps towards me hesitantly. “Don’t get upset,” he murmurs, wrapping his arms around me as I lean towards him. “You don’t have to see her unless you want to. I kind of thought you did.”

“So did I until just now.”

“Shhhh. It’s fine. It’s just a check and a card.”

“I’m still going to school today,” I declare, wiping my eyes. “Screw her. She’s not fucking up my life any more than she already has.”

I shake it off rather quickly. She doesn’t matter anymore. Isaac wastes no time making me laugh when he sees that I’m trying to normalize. He’s so ridiculously sweet it’s hard to leave him, but that would defeat the entire purpose of having a regular day even though my train wreck mother called and totally fucked with my head. I don’t even want to understand why that bothered me so much, all I know is that I never want to hear her voice again.

I do have a normal day. I come home to the aroma of a delicious dinner, Isaac’s smiling face, and my purring cat. Then Garrett calls and he is completely fucking hysterical. Obviously it has nothing to do with the untimely demise of his aunt because he didn’t even know her, but he’s crying more than he has since he was little. It’s absolutely imperative that we see our mother and when I don’t want to, he demands to know what I’m hiding. I don’t know what to tell him because I’m not really sure myself. Logically, I don’t want him around because of all the craziness, but I feel so ashamed of myself for letting all this happen that I can’t imagine looking him in the eye. Pretty soon I’m crying too, which just freaks him out more. He starts screaming that he needs to see me face to face or he will tell my mother, his grandparents, his teachers, the cops and anyone else who will listen that something is wrong with his sister and her boyfriend won’t allow her to see her family.

Shit! Now Isaac knows that Garrett tried to come up to visit on his spring break and I blew him off, citing my thesis as an excuse. I sure could use that same excuse right now, but it’s done. Why did I have to work so hard and finish the stupid thing early? Before I know it, I’m so desperate to put my little brother at ease and stop him from doing something drastic that I’m making travel arrangements while Isaac puts in those brown contact lenses so he gets used to wearing them by the time we leave in two days. Great. Just fucking great.

30

Isaac

“This is a terrible idea,” Maya laments.

I’m not exactly sure what to say back because I pretty much agree with her. “It will be fine.”

“If I went by myself, we could fly.”

There’s no way in hell that is going to happen.
“I don’t want you to go by yourself, Maya. I should meet your little brother anyway.”

“And what, meet him again in a year or so when you have bright green eyes and a different name?” she snaps.

Road trips with Maya are typically a lot more fun than this. “We’ll come up with something to explain it when we have to. He’ll probably just call me by my WoW name anyway. Think of this as a quest.”

“Great,” she huffs. “It’s not a quest, it’s a bad joke. Shock, Spark, and Sneak all get into a car and drive 17 hours to a hillbilly funeral…”

It’s so hard not to laugh. Why does she have to be so fucking cute when she’s in a bad mood? It’s distracting and it makes me feel guilty because she’s not mad, she extremely anxious and reacting to it in a way that I don’t understand. The crying is a lot easier to deal with, but I’m sure we’ll get to that soon enough. Her questions and worst case scenarios try my patience for over an hour until she leans her little head against the window and falls asleep. She gets about two hours of much needed rest before we get to New York.

“Oh, my God,” she gasps when she sees her brother waiting for us. “He’s so tall.”

Maya starts crying and bolts out of the car before I’ve come to a full stop. Nice. I’m sure that made him feel a lot better about not seeing her for months. He starts sobbing too, throwing his arms around her into a protective embrace, holding her head against his chest like I do after an extended separation. After a long hug, he pulls back, putting both hands on the sides of her face and staring at her like he’s trying to figure out if she’s really alright.

I don’t like this. It doesn’t matter if it’s not romantic, I’m the only person that is supposed to touch her like that. Nobody else needs to worry if she’s okay, that’s my job. I push away the unexpected, primal jealousy and remember that not only is this her teenage brother, he’s basically a friend of mine too. And he’s been terrified for her safety for months, haunted by particularly disturbing images of sexual brutality. All in all, the kid is holding it together rather well.

No sixteen year old boy wants to be seen crying in front of another man, especially over his sister, so I stay in the car for longer than I’d like, pretending to be preoccupied with my phone. When I see him straighten up and shrug Maya away for fawning over him, I know it’s the right time to introduce myself.

“Hey Shockwave,” I say, holding out my hand to shake his. “I’m Mike.”

“Mike?”

We went with a different generic name as to not deliberately risk another person’s safety, but I feel still like shit for the deception. “Yeah, how’s it going? Sorry about your aunt.”

“Thanks,” he mutters. The kid already hates me, I can tell. He probably thinks I hurt his sister and he isn’t completely wrong.

Maya wraps her arm around my waist, but she won’t make eye contact with her brother and she looks extremely nervous. Garrett glances at her and back to me, his accusing eyes full of questions. I kiss the top of her head and she smiles slightly, but it didn’t help. Fuck. This is going to be a long drive.

“Why couldn’t we fly again?” Garrett grumbles after a mere half hour in the car.

“I hate flying,” Maya says.

“Since when?” her brother asks, but she doesn’t answer. “How do you feel about flying,
Mike
?”

“I’m cool with it, I fly all the time for work. Maya’s just been a little claustrophobic lately,” I explain, staring at him via the rear view mirror.

His eyes widen as he catches my meaning. I pull her hand to my lips and kiss her fingers over and over again, tickling her wrist with my stubble until she starts to giggle. That pleasantly surprised him and he almost smiles, his posture becoming less defensive as he makes a mocking gag sound and tells us to knock it off. A small victory, but I haven’t exactly won him over yet.

I am so glad that I thought to look up games to play for road trips. We spend the first few hours playing 20 questions while keeping an eye out for unique car models and state license plates. Once we’re sick of that, I keep the conversation going by reminiscing about our WoW conquests, along with laughing about our fuck ups. It backfires and Garrett wants to know about my extended absence last fall. And how we met, how long we’ve been together, what I do for a living. They’re normal questions, but that’s not why he’s asking. He’s worried about his sister and he doesn’t trust me.

I give most of the answers because I’m the one that made up the story and the whole thing makes Maya visibly anxious. I’m not feeling much better and I suck at hiding it. This is the first time I’ve had to answer this stuff, and yeah, I’m prepared, but what happens in the future? I’ll always need a cover story to camouflage who I was and how I became lucky enough to love her. Will Maya always be ashamed of it, too?

I suggest that she sits in the back seat with her brother when we’re at a gas station about halfway to the hotel. She doesn’t want to because that will be weird, and she’s awkwardly quiet when we stop to get a bite to eat. Well, Garrett and I eat. Maya just picks at her salad and if I push her to actually consume some food, I’ll definitely look like the controlling prick her brother probably thinks I am.

“We should stop in Asheville,” Garrett says when we tell him we’re spending the night in Charlotte. “It’s a prettier ride.”

“The wake starts at noon, it will take too long to get through the mountains. I thought you wanted to see mom and Laurel first.”

“I do. I just really liked it there when we went on vacation with Dad that time and I always wanted to see the scenery again.”

“It might still be all brown at this time of year.”

“You lived in the mountains before I was born, right?”

“Yeah, for a couple of years. It was far northern Georgia, though,” she says.

“So what were we doing in Asheville?”

“Sightseeing before and after visiting Mom’s side of the family.”

“Were we alone with Dad for part of it? I don’t really remember her being there for the fun stuff.”

“Yeah, it was just the three of us for a few days. Dad got in a fight with Uncle Dean and took off with us.”

“He just left Mom and Laurel there?” he asks.

“They wanted to stay.”

“What was everybody fighting about?”

“I don’t remember.”

“Yeah, you do,” Garrett laughs. “You remember everything.”

“Then I must have not been paying attention. It was probably about money, it always is.”

“It’s not their fault that they’re so poor.”

“It’s their fault that they’re drunk and belligerent all the time,” she grumbles.

“Is that why you don’t want to see them?”

Maya is quiet for a while before she says, “Yes. I can’t handle the yelling.”

“I don’t remember a lot of yelling.”

“Like you said, I remember everything.” Poor Maya. She sounds so bitter even though she’s trying to hide it.

“Tanya is the one that Mom didn’t like, right?”

“Mom doesn’t really like any of her sisters, but yeah, she liked Tanya least of all.”

“How many sisters does she have again?”

“Three sisters. Two full broth
ers and two half-brothers from Papaw’s first wife.”

“Will they all be there?”

“Probably. Tanya was the baby of the family, this is a big deal,” Maya explains.

“I feel like I don’t know any of these people.”

“You sort of don’t.”

“Do you?”

“Kinda.”

“Do you think our little brother will even recognize us?” Garrett says quietly.

“Maybe.”

“How old us Kurt now?”

“He just turned six.”

“And Laurel is 28?” he asks.

“Yeah.”

“That is a
huge
difference.”

“That’s what happens when you have your first kid at 15 and your last one at 37.”

“When was the last time you saw everybody?”

“Most of them came around when we moved down there after Dad died.”

“I don’t really remember that very well, either.”

“Good. It sucked.”

“It’s my own family and I won’t know anybody at this thing.”

“Garrett… They’ll know you,” Maya assures him. “Hey, I put a bunch of pictures on my phone. Do you want to go through them, see if anybody sticks out to you?”

“Sure.”

“Isssssa…” She almost just said my name. “saw a sign for a rest stop ahead, Mike. Let’s stop so I can go pee and get in the back seat.”

“Okay,” I reply.

“Are you sure you’ll be fine driving the whole way?” she asks me.

“Positive.”
I just went down another half a gram on the Klonopin. I won’t sleep through the night for a week.
“We can do the mountains on the way back, if you guys want.”

“We’re in the south now, Mike. It’s y’all, not you guys,” Garrett corrects me.

“I can’t say that, man,” I laugh. “I’m a Yankee.”

“When in Rome, dude…”

Maya hugs me really hard when we’re stretching our legs outside the car. Why did Garrett have to be in the bathroom for that? They spend the rest of the ride going over pictures of relatives. Maya tells her brother everything she knows about the interpersonal dynamics of the family and there’s a lot of who hates who to remember. Garrett insists that it can’t possibly be that bad and she laughs. Just wait and see. Eventually, it gets too quiet and I glance behind me to see that they both fell asleep. She migrates closer to him and ends up with her head on his shoulder. It doesn’t make me jealous this time.

She has a nightmare around three in the morning. It’s a bad one too, full of screaming and thrashing that inspires Garrett to leap out of his bed and rush to ours. The confusion in his eyes turns to rage when he sees me holding her by the wrists and shaking her.

“What the fuck are you doing to her?”

“Trying to wake her up,” I reply calmly. “Maya…”

“Let her go!” Garrett demands.

“That makes it worse.” I pull her into my lap and hold her closer so that she can’t move, weaving my fingers into hers.

“Does this happen a lot?” he asks.

“Yeah.”

“She’s dreaming about him, isn’t she?”

“Shhhh,” I whisper, to both of them really because her eyes flutter open, darting around the unfamiliar room until she sees my face.

Maya doesn’t see her brother though and sits upright on my thighs, wrapping her legs around my waist and her arms around herself as she hides under my chin. She whimpers, snuggling closer as I rock her back and forth, my lips against her hair. This is awkward, probably more so for Garrett, but at least I get a chance to show him that she runs toward me when she’s scared, not away from me.

Usually Maya falls right back asleep after the terror subsides, but sometimes she wants me to fuck her in a validating, life affirming kind of way. Of course it had to be the latter tonight and she’s really out of it. Her spine straightens and her lips start to kiss my neck, murmuring how much she loves me and what she wants me to do her. As if this wasn’t already uncomfortable enough.

“We can’t,” I chuckle as Garrett’s eyes widen, the first step in his retreat back to his own bed. “Stop it, Maya,” I whisper as she lets out a bratty groan and reaches under my waistband. “Your little brother is asleep in the next bed.”

“Huh?” That woke her up all the way. She sits up in my lap and stares at me, her gaze quickly surveying the hotel room surroundings behind me as she fully realizes where she is. I don’t need to see her adorable face to know that she’s blushing. “Crap! Do you think he heard me?”

“I hope not.” That’s as close as I can get without flat out lying.

“Me too. Oh, my God,” she giggles, the blue moon light illuminating the halo of curly stray hairs as she sinks her face into her hands.

I pull the covers over us, kissing her chastely as we cuddle until she falls back asleep. If I’m lucky, I’ll get a little rest myself. The alarm wakes me up a couple hours after I finally drift off. Maya didn’t even hear it, she’s slumbering peacefully on top of me. I look around the room and realize that Garrett isn’t in his bed, so he must have seen us sleeping like this. There’s no way he still thinks I’m an abusive douchebag after last night. I crawl out from under my girlfriend to turn off that horrible screeching clock as her brother emerges from the bathroom and deliberately doesn’t look in our direction.

Maya grabs a shower first so there’s a chance her hair will be dry by the time we get there, which leaves me alone with Garrett. I roll my lips together and stare at the floor when he looks at me, laughing.