Deep in You (Phoenix #1) (5 page)

“If I stay, will you show me one of your routines? I could use the distraction.”

What? No. I’m not a trained monkey performing tricks.

“We’ll see,” I answered.

Perhaps it would be a fun diversion to give her a private show.

Wait. What the hell was I thinking? I was not an adolescent, needing to show off to some girl in hopes she’d go out with me. I was Xander fucking Phoenix. I needed to get my shit together.
If
I gave her what she wanted, it would be because it was a diversion, like she’d said. Nothing more.

We sat down together on the couch. I turned to face her and brought my right leg up between us. Slowly I unwrapped the bandage around my ankle.

The skin underneath displayed a nasty green bruise. Gingerly I rotated my foot. It wasn’t too bad; I’d done worse to myself. The appearance was the worst of it. A glance at Lily found her staring at me with a look of horror on her face.

“Hey…” My words forced Lily to look me in the eyes. I smiled reassuringly at her. “What’s wrong?”

“That looks horrible, Xander.”

“Just a bruise. It doesn’t even hurt that much. I’ve had worse.”

She swallowed hard and nodded a little, then tucked her feet beneath her. I rewrapped my ankle and watched her for a bit.

“So you have me at a bit of a loss, Lily Campbell. I know your name. I know you have stunning brown eyes and, based on the condition of my back, are quite a tiger in bed. I know you like fruity martinis and you don’t like being bored by losers in clubs. I think that’s about it. You know quite a bit more about me.”

“You also know that I recently broke up with my ex.”

I sighed. “Yes, I suppose I do remember you saying that.”

“Why’d you react that way? Would you rather we were still together?”

To be honest, I didn’t give a shit
who
she was with. I knew that wasn’t the answer she wanted to hear, though.

“No,” I said. “I think my feelings on that are quite clear. I was just hoping you’d tell me a little more about yourself. What makes you tick?”

She stared at me, fear written all over her face. I was becoming more confused by the moment.

“I’m a journalist,” she whispered, turning away from me. She twisted her hands nervously in her lap, and her complexion turned ashen.

My brow furrowed. Had she written something bad about me in the past? Why did she look so freaked out? “Are you okay? Are you going to be sick?”

She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. I placed my hand over hers. I couldn’t help myself. “You ashamed of being a journalist?”

“Not normally, no.”

“But now…?”

“I’m a journalist for
CaS
.”

There it was. The reason for her shame and hesitation all made sense now.
Celebrities and Sinners
. A tabloid.

Shit!
She worked for a tabloid, and here we were together, drugged. The many ways this disaster could be spun out of proportion rushed through my brain all at once. One thing was certain: Sam needed to hurry with those reports.

I realized I was staring at her, so I cleared my throat and attempted to act normal. “So, a journalist, huh?”

“It’s still considered journalism.”

“Really? Writing goss–I mean, good writing for a public magazine or newspaper should always be considered journalism. Of course.”

“That’s true.” She looked up at me then. Her face was still pale but she seemed to be sizing me up. Grabbing her water bottle, I held it out to her and stood. “Well, come on, then.”

“Where are we going?”

I gestured toward the gym doors. If we’d needed a distraction before, it couldn’t compare to how badly we needed one now. “A deal’s a deal.”

We re-entered my gym, and I considered all the possibilities. I opened a cabinet drawer near the doors and removed my ring grips. I pulled them onto my hands and glanced at her. “Ladies’ choice. What do you want to see?”

She looked around, her eyes lighting up. “What would you like to show me?”

“Up to you. Rings, of course, are what I’m known for but, as I’m sure you know, I always try to qualify for the all-around. I enjoy floor routines and the horizontal bar almost as much.”

“Rings, please, Xander.”

I nodded, pleased with her choice. “Anything that you see here is off the record.”

“You think I would write about this?”

I chuckled. “Nope. I don’t think your readers would care about my workout routine. I think my competitors might, though, so better safe than sorry.” I covered my hands in chalk and approached the apparatus. I gazed up at it with affection. Sometimes it seemed I was born for rings, my favorite event. I mentally ran through my routine, focusing my attention inward and getting in the zone. Time always seemed to slow way down whenever I prepared for a performance; all the chaos of my life would fall away and leave me with a feeling of peace.

I braced. Mounting the rings apparatus was always easier with Sam around. I’d have to jump and catch them just right without his guiding hands.

I lifted one arm up. Unnecessary in this forum, but a good habit to keep. I bent at the knees and sprang into the air, catching both rings. Instinctively my hands shifted to adjust my grip a few times, then, when I was ready, I straightened my arms to hang free. I pulled my feet in front of me and rose into a handstand. I counted to ten, then dropped down until my body was parallel to the floor, facing down. Adjusting my grip once more, I lifted myself as if I were doing a push-up into a higher position. I lowered again to hang all the way down before rolling over to perform a slow somersault. That done, I straightened out and held for a few seconds. Taking a deep breath, I spun around three times in quick succession, reversing my hands effortlessly each time, finally ending in the Iron Cross formation.

My muscles twitched as I heard a gasp. Sweat beaded on my brow, yet I held the pose. I needed my focus back. Why was she able to distract me? I’d blocked out cameras, cheers, and arenas filled to capacity in the past, but one woman managed to sneak into my brain in the middle of a workout. Must have been the drug remnants in my system.

Wait, wasn’t I supposed to be counting this position? Great. My distraction was worse than I thought. At least Lily didn’t know my routine. I’d just do the shorter competition version, rather than my workout version. I began to prepare myself for the landing, assessing my foot. I lifted myself back into a handstand, then started to spin. Once, twice, and I released, curling in on myself and tumbling three times before my feet hit the mat.

Pain shot through my right foot, but I’d stuck it. I froze, my knees bent. Yup, that shit hurt, but it was manageable. I straightened up and flung my arms into the air. Perfect.

I smiled at Lily as she applauded. She looked a little happier than she had before we came in here. More color to her cheeks. Maybe the adrenaline helped.

All at once, I was able to see her in the same light as I had in the club. Despite everything we had been through, all the things we had said, the attraction was still there. Everything faded, her accusations, my fury, all of it. I plucked the ring grips off my hands and dropped them on the floor, then closed the distance between us.

“Xander, that was–”

I interrupted her with a rough kiss, forcing my tongue into her mouth. My hands cupped her ass and pulled her tight against me. This was more like it. Now she was where
I
wanted her, and not arguing with me. I was instantly hard as stone, and I wanted her to feel what she did to me. I wanted her.
Now
.

“You took advantage of me…”
The memory struck me, and with it, my anger returned. With a snarl of frustration, I tore myself away from her and struggled to catch my breath. I was far more winded from kissing her for less than a minute than I was from that entire rings routine.

“Why did you stop?”

“This was wrong.”

“Wrong?”

“Yes. You’re still sick. I’ve already been accused of taking advantage of you once. I won’t allow it to happen again.”

I also shouldn’t lose focus of the fact that we were only in this predicament because
she
couldn’t be bothered to follow simple safety protocols when drinking with strangers. This whole situation was all
her
fault, for all she’d blamed me for it.

“I’m sorry I said that. I didn’t mean it, I swear. Besides, I’m feeling much better.”

“That’s nice.” I wandered over to the parallel bars and pulled myself up to work through my routine. My body switched into autopilot as my mind wandered off.

I never should have given in and kissed her. She seemed the needy type and, make no mistake, I did not want her thinking she would have a chance with me. I had no intention of fucking her again, no matter what my traitorous body wanted. I didn’t do repeat performances. I was just waiting for Sam to call so I could send her on her way.

I released my right hand, flipping backward through the air while spinning around blindly to catch the other bar, then lifted into a handstand.

“You know, you never see this side of you on the television.”

Her voice startled me, wrenching me from my thoughts. I jerked, losing my position and crashing down to the padded mat. Knowing what was coming, I relaxed my body to soften the impact.

“Oh my God, are you okay?” She covered her mouth, obviously trying not to laugh. She had some nerve, laughing at me.

“I’m fine. I know how to fall. I just prefer not doing it. Which, by the way, wouldn’t have happened if you had kept quiet. You startled me.”

“I startled you? How on earth could I have startled you?”

“Must be the drugs. My head isn’t in the game.” That was my story and I was sticking to it. I’d performed in front of millions. There was
no
excuse for one woman to have gotten to me like that.

“I see.” Lily paused. “I was just kidding around anyway. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any harm, it’s just…”

“Just?”

She blushed again. “On television, you’re always wearing your uniform. Here, nothing but your loose workout pants, and they leave little to the imagination.”

I glanced down at my still-obvious erection. Bastard wasn’t going down at all, and her proximity wasn’t helping matters. I swallowed hard. “Sorry.”

She licked her lips, her eyes dark. My breathing quickened in response, though I tried my best to appear unaffected. “No need to apologize. It turns me on,” she said.

She reached out a hand to help me up, but I grabbed her and dragged her down next to me. “So let’s talk about that, now that you’ve gotten me down here.”

“I got you down here?”

“That’s right.”

“Looks like you got down here all by yourself.”

She leaned forward and kissed me. I made a half-hearted attempt to back away, but she followed me, and who was I kidding, anyway? A gentleman would have better restraint, but I’d never claimed to be a gentleman… at least, not when it came to conquests. I hummed low in my chest, my tongue claiming hers while her hand trailed down my chest. I
never
did repeat performances… but perhaps, given the circumstances, I could make one exception.

Last night didn’t count, anyway. Neither of us were at our best, and she
did
seem like she felt better.

My breath caught as she slipped her hand into the waistband of my sweats and tentatively stroked my length. Her fingers felt tantalizingly cool, but not too cold. Lifting myself up a little, I pushed my sweats down just enough to give her easier access, then drew her back into our kiss, demanding her attention. My tongue set a tempo as I thrust it in and out of her mouth, while the hand on my throbbing shaft slowly changed to match my pace. I moaned as I felt her confidence building, and lowered my hand to massage her breast.

“Squeeze it, Lily, just a little harder,” I murmured. “Mmm… just like that.”

“Xander, I’m so wet for you, I want to taste you so bad.”

Her words nearly drove me insane as I plunged my tongue back into her mouth. Her hand tightened around me slightly more as she jerked me off faster and faster. She settled into a rhythm, switching it up every few minutes, bringing me closer and closer to the brink. Each change felt more intense than the last, and I knew my release would be soon. It was too much, too good, the contrast of her soft lips and tongue versus the tightness of her fingers.

“Lily,” I gasped, panting, “you’ll make me come. I’m almost there.”

She grinned against my mouth, encouraged. “Good. Those sounds you’re making are killing me. You’re so hard, and I keep picturing how you would feel inside me. It’s all I can do to not finger myself right now.”

I moaned and reached for her, but she shifted away, a mischievous look on her face. All I was able to reach were her breasts, which I again took full advantage of.

“Oh fuck. Higher. Squeeze the tip. Don’t slow down.”

She immediately complied, almost letting go as she hit the sensitive head with almost all of her fingers.

“Oh fuck! Oh fuck, yes!”

“My mouth is watering. I want to taste you so bad.”

I released her breasts and gripped her hair, yanking her head down toward my waiting cock. Her warm, wet mouth enveloped me, welcomed my hard shaft. I didn’t waste any time and thrust my hips upward, fucking her mouth. Her tongue swirled up and down, in contrast with her hand around the base of my dick.

“Suck it, baby. Suck it hard.”

Her cheeks hollowed as she did as I instructed. My eyes rolled back into my head as she leaned forward and swallowed me. The head of my cock shoved deep into her throat, all the way back to where the hardness of the top of her mouth gave way to the softness of her throat.

I gasped as my orgasm struck in pulsating waves. She continued to suck me, swallowing as my come spurted powerfully down her throat. I cried out, the sensations becoming almost too much to bear.

I squirmed from her grasp, then leaned forward and kissed her, basking in the warm afterglow. I felt relaxed, lethargic… but I wouldn’t give in. Not now, not with Lily here next to me, wet and practically squirming for my touch. I had a reputation to uphold. I moved lower and nuzzled her neck, scratching her with my stubble and biting down softly on her flesh. She gasped and arched her back, her hips jutting forward. That was all the invitation I needed. I dragged her shirt over her head and bent down to draw one of her erect nipples into my mouth. I bit down hard and swirled my tongue around it.