Darwin's Paradox (23 page)

“While normal people rely on REM sleep to activate theta rhythm, and veemelds need Interact-SYM to turn it on in waking hours during veemeld, you have it on all the time through Proteus! That’s why you could veemeld with SAM any time you wanted and heard all the other A.I.s of the city in your brain.” He shook his head in amazement. She could see evidence of his mind racing with the consequences she’d already come up with. “And that’s why your reflexes, cognition, and memory are so advanced. You’re not only generating new neurons but also processing as you go along. Infants need four times the REM sleep as adults, because that’s when they build new neurons, under theta rhythm. You do it all day and night!”

“Okay!” she said, hearing her voice go shrill. “Enough, Zane. We don’t have all day to do research.” She realized she was sliding over the edge of her patience. “We need a strategy. This virus is smart. It can think. What’s it thinking? Does it have deterministic thoughts? Motive? What? Why did it correct itself? Come on, Zane. Get back on track.”

“Your dreams, Julie. The answer’s got to be in your dreams.” He nodded to himself, eyes roaming the room thoughtfully.

She frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Well,” he responded, crossing his arms and gazing at her intensely. “Considering that these dreams most likely occur during your normal REM sleep periods, those visions probably represent your most lucid communications with Proteus.”

She was afraid he’d say that she’d deduced as much herself. She hauled in a long breath.

“Tell me about your dreams,” Zane urged.

“I think we should get out of here first,” Julie insisted. Was she avoiding the issue? “It’s only a question of time before security comes snooping in here despite the display.”

Zane nodded grimly. “Yeah. I guess you’re right. It’s late and we all need some sleep.”

“I know someplace we can go for the night,” Victor’s meek voice trilled.

Aard’s
place was a small three-room hovel in MacArthur Mall in the outer-city fringe. Not far from where Julie’s uncle had lived—that was before Frank and his sadistic cronies had dragged him to the Pol Station where he’d committed the desperate act of suicide and her life here in Icaria had fallen apart.

Julie threw furtive glances behind them as Victor unsealed the door with his card then motioned for them to enter and went in. Zane shoved Frank, still bound, inside. Julie followed, shutting the door quietly behind her.

As Zane and Victor secured their prisoner, Julie wandered Aard’s leisure room. The place was a mess and stale with the smell of old drug and unwashed clothes. Scraps of clothing lay scattered over the worn cloth furniture, the floor and the frayed scatter rug. At least a dozen empty drug bottles stood on the synthetic wood coffee table and more littered the floor. Julie shivered and realized that nervous exhaustion was getting the better of her.

As if afraid of the silence, Zane muttered, more to himself than to Julie or Victor: “What are we going to do with the Head Pol? I still think we should ditch him tomorrow. This is too dangerous, lugging him around. I know you said that we can do it all through the lower levels but still...”

Julie filtered him out, realizing with wry humor that his rambling reminded her of SAM’s insufferable dissertations on any fertile topic she offered. She noticed several old holos over the fake fireplace and drew closer. The large one in the middle was Angel! Next to it hung several holos of the three of them. She remembered posing for the images. So this was where they ended up. They were his family, she concluded, feeling her throat constrict. They were all he had.

Victor came along side her and fixed his gaze on the holos. “You miss them a lot, don’t you?” he asked in a quiet voice that showed genuine caring.

“Terribly,” she responded, hearing her voice warble. She refused to think the unthinkable: that Daniel was here because Angel had been killed in the heath. Since that last garbled communication, she’d tried several times to reach Angel to no avail. Yet, somehow she felt sure she’d have sensed it if Angel had perished. She had to still be alive. Returning her thoughts to this place, she added, “I miss Aard too.”

“I know you think Aard was just spying on you for Icaria but he regarded you with the highest respect and he would never have hurt you or your family.”

“I know that.”

“He enjoyed being with you. You made him feel so welcome.”

Not always, she thought, recalling their confrontation and his departure from the camp. “He was a good man,” she offered.

“The best,” Victor said. Then after a pause, “I’m sure he’s dead.”

She turned to study his sober face. He obviously considered Aard a friend as well as a colleague. She wanted to comfort him with a hug, but recoiled, remembering Victor’s creepy habits. Instead she offered information, “You’re right. He is dead.” She touched his shoulder briefly. “I’m sorry.”

His gaze flickered over her face, carefully avoiding her eyes and she saw his face darken with grief but not surprise. “How?” he asked.

“A sniper shot him. He was protecting me, trying to keep me alive.”

“Yes, I know.”

After a moment of confusion, a hideous thought occurred to her and she hid her revulsion. Of course, Aard had an implant too. “Your device...” she whispered.

Victor’s hands flickered over his face. “One morning I tuned in and he was gone. I couldn’t be sure whether something had happened to his implant or to him.”

Julie gave Victor a puzzled look. “But why did he return to the heath? By then you were in the Pol Station and the Head Pol—” she shot a glance at Frank, “forbid him to go out again.”

“Aard was loyal to me, not the Head Pol.” After another pause, “Loyal to you,” he added meaningfully. “He’d have done anything for you and your family.”

She bowed her head. “He did.”

“Hey, guys,” Zane approached them. “We better get some sleep. We came here to get some rest, remember? There’s a bedroom with two beds and this couch.” He pointed to a musty cloth couch.

“You two go ahead and use the bedroom,” Julie insisted and flopped into one of the cheap foam chairs that smelled of mildew. She tucked her legs under her and huddled to keep in her waning warmth. “I’ll take the first guard.”

Zane and Victor exchanged glances. Victor’s brows furrowed. “You sure? You didn’t get much sleep. And you’ve been...through a lot.” His face tightened. “We need you well-rested for tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Zane agreed. He stepped forward. “I can take the first shift.”

“I said I’d do it,” she cut him off sharply. How could she tell them that she was afraid to go to sleep? She pulled her hair back from her face with both hands and gave them a reassuring smile, hoping they hadn’t noticed that her hands were shaking. “I’m okay. Honest. Go on. I’ll wake you for the second shift, Zane.”

He nodded then glanced at Frank, tied up in the corner. Frank glared back at him. “If the bastard does anything, and I mean anything, you call, okay?”

She nodded with a thankful smile and shifted into a more comfortable position in the chair.

Victor instructed his droid to go into the bedroom. Then, with an awkward look that reminded her oddly of Daniel when they were first courting, he bid her a quiet good night. He threw several glances at Frank and shuffled his feet in hesitation toward the bedroom then stopped. He seemed to be mustering the courage to say something as his gaze flitted from her face to the floor.

Julie swallowed. She wanted to like Victor. He exhibited a sweet vulnerability that she cherished in men, but somehow it had twisted into something unsavory and revolting. Peeping into people’s intimate lives, especially hers, like that...she didn’t trust him. But he’d also just confronted the most powerful man in Icaria to help her. Victor was, at best, a paradox like her she concluded.

She gave him a lopsided smile. “Thanks, Victor, for coming to my rescue.”

His eyes still sparkled like a frightened rabbit’s, but he seemed to relax and with a self-conscious nod he turned to join Zane in the bedroom. At the bedroom door he looked back to face her with a complicated smile. It trembled on his face like sunlight flickering with the breeze through a forest. “Actually, you’re the one who did the rescuing. We just provided some distraction for you.” Then he closed the door with a soft nick and Julie found her eyes drifting to Frank.

His eyes met hers and she imagined him sneering under the cloth covering his mouth. She looked away and tried to hide the shiver that ran through her. What on Earth was she doing here? Sitting in a musty chair in a dead spy’s apartment, with the man who’d just raped her, leering at her. Separated from her family, from her daughter who, wherever she was, was in danger even now from the worst enemy she could conceive—from the assassins of Icaria-5 and Gaia to the conniving virus already inside her. Oh, Angel! How can I warn you? I don’t know where you are...

She raked back the hair that had fallen again over her face and leaned in the chair, biting down on her lip. Then she folded her arms around herself as memories of her beloved daughter surged up like a river flooding its banks. She heard Angel’s sweet laughter as they played chase among the bushes; watched her rapt face as Daniel told her a bedtime story; soothed Angel’s tears with a hug and kiss on a wet cheek when she scraped herself...

Then Angel’s distorted face from that dream intruded: “I don’t need you. I can take care of myself now, Mother.”

She jerked in her chair and blinked her eyes open, realizing that she’d drifted off for a moment. She caught Frank still watching her with ocean-deep eyes. She swallowed down the vision and commanded herself to stay awake. Too comfortable, she thought and sat up straight, swinging her legs out from under her. She shook her head to clear it and gave Frank a frosty little smile. Just enjoy yourself, buddy boy, she thought. He didn’t sneer. To her surprise his face pinched with raw emotion and the look in his eyes grew tender. Then—she couldn’t believe it—tears filled his eyes and spilled down his cheeks. She leaned forward and stared. She just about rose from the chair then pulled back. Can’t trust him. Drawing up her legs and gathering them in her arms, Julie turned resolutely away from him and refused to look his way again.

Julie leaned her chin on her knees and stared vacantly into space. Snug in the chair in the quiet of the night, her thoughts eventually returned to Angel. Julie recalled the verbal retort Angel had hurled at her about growing up and being independent. They were the last words Julie heard from her daughter before she left them. Was that why she’d had the vision? Perhaps it wasn’t Proteus really talking to her but her own angst expressing itself. She could deal with that, she thought. Well, maybe. Had Angel already embraced Darwin? It had been inside her since she was conceived. If she had, which was it? The blind trust of a naïve girl or an intuitive wisdom that Julie herself lacked? What was Proteus, after all?

Julie closed her eyes for a moment and inhaled deeply. Her head ached and she felt so tired...

***

Victor shut the door behind him and ignored Zane who nattered to himself while undressing by the bed he’d already chosen, the one that wasn’t sunken in the middle. Victor stood transfixed at the door, his mind sailing to the image he’d left behind of Julie furled like a cat on the couch. To his delight and consternation he’d found every part of her exposed skin highly erotic. Her slender arms, curled around her waist to keep in the warmth, called to his own arms...that slightly guarded smile and the downy curls of hair at the temples sent a passionate shiver through him...the soft long lines of her neck that rose up in exquisite elegance to her exposed ears as she drew back her hair with a graceful sweep of her hands haunted him with a relentless desire to touch her. His thoughts all ran together and he seemed to melt under the gaze of those intimidating brilliant green eyes.

Yes, he’d sent Aard to watch her. And he’d even rationalized why: she was indispensable and would no doubt prove useful in the future—which was true—but his visceral motivation was simply to remain connected to her in some way. She would never know how much she meant to him and what he felt for her, but she’d been his inspiration and his secret love for so long. And now that she was here with him in the flesh, her voice sweet like the nectar of a young flower, it terrified him.

He jumped at Zane’s voice. “You coming to bed or are you going to stand there all night?” Zane asked, already comfortable under the covers. He yawned loudly. “Get some sleep, Burke.”

“Yeah,” Victor murmured. “You’re right.” He quickly undressed, slid under the covers of the creaking bed and found his gaze drifting to his droid and the delicious memories stored inside it.

***

Julie drags her feet slowly through the dark wet halls of what used to be SAM’s smooth crystal matrix. The overwhelming stench burns her throat raw and fills her with a fear. The hunched figure beckons her with a sweeping arc of its arm. She hopes desperately that it isn’t Angel.
Angel?

The cowl falls and Angel’s wizened face smiles at her with detached sympathy. She says in a voice that belongs to her but also to a thousand other voices,
[Please try to accept Proteus like I have...]

No. Don’t say that. I just can’t. I won’t!

[Why?]

I think Proteus is dangerous.

[That’s like saying you’re dangerous. Ever since you were five, Proteus was part of you.]

Not completely. Angel, don’t give in. Don’t let Proteus—

[Please join us, Mother...I must go now to do my part...]

No! Angel, wait!
Julie lunges out but abruptly collides with something. She realizes it is a man’s arms, his vice grip hurting her as she fiercely struggles forward.
Let me go! I have to help her!
she screams, and clamors to get past.

“She doesn’t need your help”, the man says behind her. The voice is strangely familiar, the voice of someone she normally trusts. She wants to turn to see who is holding her back but must fix her gaze on Angel who even now recedes into the living wall.
Angel, don’t go! No! Oh—

Julie jolted awake, almost falling out of her chair. Flushed and breathing heavily, she wiped her hair aside and spun an embarrassed look to the corner where Frank was tied up. The ropes lay there empty. She threw her gaze around the room.

“Terrific!” She leaped up from her chair and bolted through the bedroom door. “Frank’s escaped! He’s—”

She stopped in her tracks. Zane snored loudly in his bed, but Victor lay on his back under his covers with his Sentech-2 visor on his head and arm busily playing a lower part of his anatomy. His droid stood beside him, connected to his set via a cable. The switch for holo playback was lit. She glanced from the droid to Victor’s face through the transparent shield. His eyes were open but he didn’t see her. Their gaze and his face moved in a dumb expression of vacant ecstasy and he breathed in halting spurts. She could guess from what—she’d seen that stupid expression on Frank’s face so many times while he watched a sex vid on his vee-set instead of conversing with her. But this, of course, was Sentech-2, the next best thing to the real thing...perhaps better than the real thing for some, she thought, grimacing in disgust as she watched Victor’s face and body convulse in sexual excitement.