Danger Close (Shadow Warriors) (29 page)

“You bastard!” she hissed. “You—how could you?” And she took three strides forward as he rose from behind his desk. In one smooth motion, she raised her hand and slapped him as hard as she could. The sound cracked through the room. She stood there, her breath coming in ragged gasps.

Jim staggered back a step, his hand automatically moving to his smarting cheek. His eyes hardened visibly and his mouth became a line of controlled tension.

“What the hell was that for?”

“You ought to know! And if you don’t, you’re even a worse human being than I could ever imagine.” Cathy laid both hands flatly against the desk, leaning toward him. “You used me! You gained my trust because you and that hard-assed Marine colonel wanted to put a wire on me. Well,” she ground out, “it won’t work. Mackey just got done giving me the fatherly act, the third degree and even tried to tell me how useful I’d be. It didn’t work, Captain Boland. I hate you! I hate you for thinking you could use me like that!”

Boland’s face tightened into a cold mask. “Mackey? What’s he got to do with this? What are you talking about?” An icy feeling invaded him. Had Mackey spilled everything to her in hopes of getting her to wear the wire?

Cathy choked on explosive laughter. “Oh, come on, Captain! Don’t feign surprise over this. You set me up and he walked in to sell me a bill of goods! God only knows why. He kept pointing to a pile of reports, saying the Delta women Stateside had ratted on Lane.”

“Tell me about it,” he ordered roughly. “What did he say?”

Cathy straightened up, throwing her shoulders back, giving him a quick thumbnail sketch of her conversation with Mackey. Perplexed by Jim’s pallor beneath his dark tan, she was thrown off guard as he came around the desk. When he settled his hands on her shoulders, she tried to jerk out of his grip.

“Get your hands off me!”

Grimly, Boland tightened his grip until she ceased her struggle. His breath was hot and punctured against her drawn face. “Now you listen to me—two days after we got back from Hua Hin, I told Colonel Mackey the mission was off. I refused to ask you to go through with it. Cathy, you’ve got to believe me!”

She choked back the rage that mingled with the urge to cry. “That’s all this whole thing was! Just another mission to you and him. You used me!”

“Yes, I used you,” Jim admitted heavily, “and without your knowledge.”

“Hua Hin was just a ruse. Just to get in good with me—”

“No,” Jim answered sharply, giving her a shake. “What we have, what we shared, is real, Cathy. That was no act on my part. Not there and not here at Alpha, either. I’ve always been honest with you where my feelings were concerned.”

“You bastard, I don’t believe you,” she rattled. “You used the weakest, most likely turncoat suspect from Delta that would turn informant on the women—”

“Mackey wanted Lane. Only Lane,” Boland explained, his voice charged with emotion. “No one else. Please, believe me—”

Cathy jerked out of his grip, placing the desk between them. “Why should I? One of you is lying! I find it hard to believe a colonel in charge of an entire regiment is! I’ve seen officers like you before. You’ll do
anything
to get ahead, to pin on another rank. All that crap about the little red swing and a country pond. Hell, you’d sell your soul to the devil if you thought you could get ahead on the military merry-go-round.”

In a lightning move, Jim reached across the desk, gripping her arm hard. “Now just a minute,” he rasped between his clenched teeth. “I was wrong in agreeing to Mackey’s request. I’m guilty of that. But what happened between us from the day we met, Cathy, was real and genuine and had
nothing
to do with his plan.” Her eyes glittered with hurt.

Cathy felt his fingers dig deeply into the flesh of her arm. “Broken promises,” she rasped. “All those hokey, down-home stories about your parents’ farm were designed to get me to trust you. You knew I had been abandoned. You knew that anything about home life would influence me.” Her voice shook. “You became exactly what I needed.” Cathy jerked her arm away from him and stepped back and took an angry swipe at her eyes. “How could you? How cruel could you be?”

Jim saw the hurt riddled in her eyes. Rage conspired with an ache widening in his chest. How could he prove to Cathy that he hadn’t lied to her? Mackey had gotten even with him. He ran a hand distractedly through his hair and briefly met her furious gaze.

“Listen to me,” he croaked, breaking the strained silence. “I want you to stay right here until I get back.” He reached for his cap on the edge of his battered desk, settling it on his head. “I’m going to see Mackey and I’m going to get this ironed out, Cathy.”

Cathy straightened up, rubbing her bruised arm. “Straighten out what? You’ve answered all the questions I had. You were both in on this together. Besides, it doesn’t matter. Mackey showed me a radio message that just came from Delta. I have to go back right now. Major Lane wants me back immediately.”

Stunned, Jim was at a loss for words. Finally, he forced out, “Why so soon? You have another week with us.” His mind raced. What had gone wrong? Did Lane suspect something was up? If she did, then Cathy was really in danger. He was torn between going to Mackey and—what? What would Mackey have done differently since he refused to cooperate with him on the plan? Jim pulled his cap off, allowing it to drop on the desk, his eyes bleak with her pain. And his.

“Right now?”

Cathy choked out, “Yes…”

“Did she give a reason why she wanted you back early?”

“How in the hell am I supposed to know? I’m only a lowly corporal.”

“Son of a bitch!”

Cathy jerked her head up as she heard the desperation in his voice. Jim stalked from one side of the room to the other, his gray eyes thunderstorm-black. She took a step toward the door.

“Wait…don’t go.”

The utter anguish in his voice caused tears to swim in her tightly shut eyes. “Why? We’ve nothing else to say to one another,” she said.

Jim shook his head and came over to Cathy. He stood close but didn’t attempt to touch her again. God, she looked so alone, so beaten, and he wanted to do anything, anything to take that feeling away from her. Anger over what Mackey had attempted to do raged with his need to help her. “Please,” he whispered thickly, “stay. We have to talk, Cathy. I can’t let you walk out of here—”

“Out of your life.”

“No! Dammit, will you just try to hear me out without judging me?”

She lifted her head, meeting and locking into his gaze. “Sorry, I’m far from perfect.” The urge to take those few steps and find sanctuary once again in his arms was overpowering. Cathy reminded herself she didn’t really know Jim at all. And the pain nearly pulverized her.

Jim lifted his hands in a gesture of peace. “Give me a few minutes, Cathy, that’s all I ask. Let me tell you everything leading up to this.” And without waiting, he launched into the details. Jim saw the tension begin to drain from her body, her shoulders stooped, as if broken by the entire chain of events.

“So you see, I am who I seem to be. The farm wasn’t a lie. The swing exists.” His voice lowered. “And I meant what I said about coming back to Nebraska with me to see it. None of that was fabrication. What I feel for you isn’t a lie.” Jim came and stood in front of her. Cathy had hung her head and crossed her arms, her expression closed. He didn’t blame her. “You’re going back to Delta,” he continued softly, “and it doesn’t matter a damn to me whether you carry a wire or not. Frankly, it’s too dangerous. But Mackey knew that when he read my final assessment and report on you.” Jim risked everything, gently settling his hands on her shoulders. She immediately stiffened, her head snapping up, eyes wide with hurt. “I can’t undo what’s been done, babe. I can’t do anything right now. I’m more concerned with Lane pulling you back to Delta early. I don’t feel good about it.” His hands tightened momentarily on her. “Wait…remember the other day when Chesty was showing you Alpha’s radio procedures before we went on R & R?”

Cathy rallied beneath the sudden hope in Jim’s voice and she looked up at him. Her heart wrenched in her chest. “Yes. Why?”

“A Recon team always has a priority channel that can’t be picked by anyone else, except by another Recon unit.” Boland managed a tight smile of triumph as he held her wavering gaze. “If you get into trouble or even sense trouble, call me. Call over here to Alpha. The radio message will never be picked up by Delta or any other company communications.” A smile shadowed his mouth and then disappeared. Jim became more serious than she had ever seen him. “Cathy, I know you don’t trust me. You have good reason to feel that way. But promise me one thing? Promise me if you ever need help while you’re with Delta, you’ll call me? I’ll tell Chesty to be on top of it. If trouble does come, at least you’ll have someone to turn to.”

She swallowed hard, unable to meet his tender expression any longer. Pulling out of his grasp, she stood several feet away from him. “I’ve got to think about this,” she whispered, pulling the cap from her back pocket. “I’ve got to go.”

Jim forced himself to remain where he stood. He ached to take her into his arms one more time. To kiss her. To somehow persuade her she meant everything to him, despite their situation. Bitterness assailed him. He’d signed his own death warrant with Cathy when he’d agreed to Mackey’s plan in the first place. “Yeah, I guess you do.” He watched her walk to the door and open it. “Cathy?” He had called her name so softly that he doubted she heard him.

Cathy turned. “What?” she rasped.

“I’m here for you. No matter what. Just remember that.” And then he managed a strained laugh. “I know a lot of people have broken their promises to you and I haven’t exactly been honest with you in some ways. No matter what has happened, I care deeply for you. Let the time we spent with one another help you decide where I stand with you.”

Blindly, Cathy dove through the door, unable to bear any more. The world was a blur through the tears that she stubbornly refused to spill from her eyes as she made her way back to the hootch and then back to Delta. Back to the real world.

CATHY’S HEART throbbed in her chest as she made her way over to Delta’s CP. The sun had dropped behind the curtain of night; darkness eating up what was left of the daylight, the jungle silhouetted against the horizon. She saw several of her friends as she found her old hootch, which was in dire need of a housecleaning. Stowing her gear, Cathy made one last check over her body to make sure her uniform was correct. She knew how fanatical Lane was about personal appearance. No longer would she be able to wear her hair down, and she quickly captured it back into the familiar ponytail at the nape of her neck. As much as she wanted to see Lisa and Penny, Cathy forced herself to get the confrontation with the major over with.

Lane didn’t look surprised when Cathy entered her tent. Her eyes hardened as she watch Fremont step in and come to rigid attention.

“Corporal Fremont reporting as ordered, ma’am.”

Lane let her stand for a long minute. She scanned her rumpled utilities, trying to ferret out any small discrepancy. Disgusted, she found none.

“I can’t say I’m personally happy to see you back, Fremont,” she muttered, standing and moving around the desk. She faced Cathy and leaned languidly against the front of the desk, still studying her. Fremont looked good. And healthy. She’d also gained some weight.

“I’m sure you missed Delta.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Cathy lied. Sweat popped out on her upper lip and she stared straight ahead. Adrenaline spurted through her bloodstream.

“You lying bitch,” Lane accused softly. “I saw you over there at the rifle competition. You had it made over there, didn’t you? Pampered like a bitch in heat. Well, they obviously didn’t use your talents at point.” She took her oak swagger stick, systematically slapping the head of it into her opened palm. “In all the time you were over there, not one kill, Fremont. It’s obvious they didn’t work you. Or put you where you could use your rifle for anything except that meaningless rifle competition.”

Cathy said nothing. The constant smacking sound of the swagger stick sent a thread of sheer terror through her. Would Lane hit her with it? Painfully, Cathy swallowed.

Louise rose, her face inches from Fremont’s. “Starting tonight at 2300, you’re taking out a four-woman patrol. An ambush patrol. I want results. Understand?”

Her breath was punctuated against Cathy’s face. “Yes, ma’am.”

“I’m giving you back your squad. I can’t afford to keep you at point.” Louise jabbed the head of the swagger stick sharply into Cathy’s rib cage. Fremont blanched and staggered back a step, remaining at attention.

“Thatcher’s dead,” she hissed, and jabbed her again, intent on bruising the hell out of Fremont and frightening her even worse. “You fucked up out in the field, Fremont. You do that one more time and I’ll let Captain Ingram take care of you. Understand?”

Pain flickered up Cathy’s side. She could feel the faint trickle of warm blood winding its way down across her ribs. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Good. Now go see Captain Ingram. She has your assignment. Dismissed.”

Cathy saluted, did an about-face and left. From the frying pan into the fire, she thought, closing down the cauldron of emotions that threatened to explode in her. She had her squad back and she’d gotten away with little punishment so far. But Lane never did do the dirty work when she wanted to pull a woman back into line. That was left to Ingram, who was only too happy to handle it.

Kay’s head snapped up, her eyes narrowing to slits as Fremont came to attention at her desk. A taut smile crossed her mouth as she laid the pen aside.

“Well, what do you know? One of my favorite women is back.” Kay saw the dark splotch of blood on the side of Fremont’s blouse, guessing what had happened. For the next ten minutes, she went over the area where the patrol was to take place. It was a known area of high contact. She saw Fremont’s pallor and smiled to herself. Good, she was properly scared. She’d better be. After getting coddled and pampered over at Alpha, Fremont was going to make up for it—in spades.

“Got your patrols mapped out for the next two weeks, Corporal,” she informed her icily. “A sort of ‘welcome back to Delta’ I’ve arranged just for you. We’ve missed you. And we want body count. Now get to hell out of here and get ready for that first patrol.”