Crushed (Rushed #2) (30 page)

"Isn't it obvious? I want you back. I came for your birthday. Now that you'll finally be twenty-one, too, we'll celebrate like we always planned."

I cursed to myself. I'd forgotten about those long-ago plans. Generally when you broke up, you assumed they were off. "That was a long time ago."

"Last summer."

"We broke up since then."

She shrugged. "Breaking up never sticks with us."

"It does this time." I sighed. I had to make her see. "I'm in love with Morgan."

Morgan

I didn't answer Dakota's calls or his texts. I put my status back to
single
on all my social media and cried myself to sleep. I woke up the next morning a lonely, headachy twenty-one-year-old. The best birthday ever had morphed into a nightmare.

There would be no birthday call from Grandma. No joint birthday with Dakota. Crap! What was I going to do about the cake? I texted Kayla and asked her to pick it up and dispose of it. It was already paid for.

The jewelry box from Grandma sat on my nightstand, where Kayla had carefully set it last night.

"Happy birthday!" I said to myself, with little enthusiasm and my eyes full of tears. Then I pulled the pink ribbon off the box and lifted the lid. A black velvet ring box was inside. I pulled it out and opened it. My birthstone—a deep red round-cut garnet that had to be several carats and was surrounded by tiny diamonds—sparkled back at me. It was set in 14K yellow gold.
 

I pulled it from the box and slid it on my finger. It fit perfectly. This was the gift Grandma gave all her granddaughters on their twenty-first. My heart ached with missing her.

Alexis tapped on my door. "May I come in?"

I could have sent her away. But I decided to give myself the gift of truth and hear her out. "Sure."

"We need to talk."
 

I didn't want to hear what she probably had to say, but I nodded anyway.

"I feel horrible about all this. Like it's partly my fault." She looked miserable. She took a deep breath. "Dakota might not be the most honest guy around."

I snorted.

"But he loves you. That much is true. Don't listen to Jordan. She's desperate. She sees how much he loves you, too. She's scared and lashing out to try to stop him from leaving her for real. But she can't."

I crossed my arms. "How much is true?"

She sighed heavily and plopped into my desk chair. "I was Dak's cover girlfriend. I was seeing Zach secretly a long time before we were found out. Jordan and Dak have been off-again on-again. But you were
never
his cover girlfriend."

"But he was seeing her while he was seeing me." My voice shook.

"Maybe. But not the way you're thinking. The situation isn't black and white. He was seeing her while you two were becoming closer. Until he could be sure."

I snorted. "Of what?"

"That you were over Zach and falling for him."

I shook my head. "You're telling me she was his fallback plan? That he always has to have a girl?"

"They were together a long time." She bit her lip. "He broke up with her once for you."

I stared at her, not believing her. I made a derisive sound. "Yeah? When?"

She answered without hesitation. "His freshman year. He was dating her when he came to college and met and fell for you the first time. He broke it off with her. Then you threw him over. It's not a good excuse, but I think he just had to be sure of you before he broke it off with her a second time.

"The point is—he did break it off. He chose you over her. That has to count for something."

Did it? My heart was begging her to be right.

For my birthday, I wanted to cower in my room alone. I managed to stay there in my sweats until nearly dinner. When Victoria dropped by to pry me out.
 

"It's your Saturday birthday! How often does that happen?" Her voice was full of that peppy verve that you use on depressed people to bring them back among the living and joyful. It never works, but people keep trying it anyway.
 

"Every seven years," I replied, deadpan.

"Longer than that if you get caught on leap year." She took my arm. "And only once if it's your twenty-first! Do you know how lucky a Saturday twenty-first birthday is?"

Not lucky enough
, I thought. Or maybe I was looking at it wrong. Maybe this "lucky" birthday had prevented me from something worse.

"It's the new semester and you're officially twenty-one and have upheld your end of the bargain. As chair of the standards board, I pronounce you officially off social probation." She amped up the pep. Which wasn't really like the cynical Victoria I knew. "You can drink your heart out!"

"Fine. Bring me a bottle."

She shook her finger at me. "Not so fast, alky. You're not drinking alone on this momentous occasion. And we, your sorority sisters, aren't going to let you ruin this milestone birthday. You're going on your birthday run and it's going to be awesome! Now shower and get ready." She grabbed my arm and pulled me off the bed.

When I came back from the shower, my room was decorated with streamers and balloons. Someone had laid out the party dress I'd planned to wear before all this happened. And Kayla was waiting to do my hair and makeup. She was the queen of the birthday makeover.

She gave me the special treatment. Getting rid of puffy, crying red eyes and circles was no easy feat. When she was finished, I looked almost good enough to pass muster as an official Double Deltsie birthday girl.

I got dressed and hesitated at the top of the stairs. All my sisters were gathered at the bottom, waiting for me. They let out a cheer when they saw me, and sang "Happy Birthday" to me as they threw confetti at me.
 

In the dining room, Kelly presented me with my official birthday run banner the girls had made for me—a large poster board heart decorated with glitter, a glittery number twenty-one, and sparkly stickers, hung on a sash. A marker hung on a string on it. Half the house was dressed up and ready to go on my run with me. The sight brought tears to my eyes again.
 

The idea of the run was simple. You went from frat to frat, knocked on the door, and asked for your birthday drink. The guys gave you your drink and wrote you a message on the birthday sign you wore. Some were sweet. Some were lewd. It was all in good fun.

"First we eat!" Victoria said. "So we don't drink on empty stomachs."

I was touched by their support, and did my best to get into the spirit. "What? Me, Morgan Peterson drink on an empty stomach? Unheard of!"
 

Yes, I was known for going out on an empty stomach.

The night was cold, but it wasn't raining or snowing. I wore a cute, flared dress coat over my party dress. It was too cold to rely purely on an alcohol blanket.

We went to Zeta Nu first. When we arrived, the guys were waiting for us on the front porch like someone had texted them we were coming.
 

"If it isn't the birthday girl!" one of the guys called out.
 

They catcalled and serenaded me as me and my sisters came up the steps. Their president waited for me with a shot of tequila.

The guys chanted as their pres handed me a lime wedge and a saltshaker. "Drink, drink, drink, drink!"

I licked my hand provocatively, salted it, and slammed the tequila. It burned all the way down. The frat pres grabbed me and kissed me on the lips. "Happy birthday, baby!"

We went from frat to frat to frat and repeated the same scene until I was buzzed and unsteady on my feet. Months of sobriety out the window. But even the alcohol didn't numb the pain. I wanted to be with Dakota.

Dakota

At the stroke of midnight, the guys in the house who were already twenty-one were taking me on a bar run. I sat in my room, playing video games, waiting for the witching hour. The jewelry box I had planned to give Morgan sat on my desk. I didn't know why I left it there. Out of false hope, I guess. Just before midnight, when her birthday was finally nearly over, I admitted defeat, grabbed it, and tossed it in a drawer. She wasn't going to answer my calls or see me. She'd shut me out.
 

I didn't want to think it. I certainly didn't want to admit it. But it felt like we were as over as Jordan and I were.
 

Just as I slammed the drawer shut, like closing a chapter on my life, there was a knock on my door.
 

I grabbed my coat. "You guys are early—" I swung the door open.
 

One of our pledges stood in the hall, holding a bakery box. "This came for you. Special delivery." He handed it to me and walked off.
 

There was no card, nothing. I was thinking it was a birthday cake from my parents. I carried it to my desk and opened it without fear. A half of a half sheet cake, its edge neatly cut in down the middle to reveal white cake and raspberry filling, sat in the box.

Happy 21
^st
Birthday, Dakota!

It was decorated with the Tau Psi letters and the university colors. One frosting champagne glass was tilted, like it should have been clinking a matching one in a toast on the missing half of the cake.

I picked up the cake, ready to throw it across the room.
 

My buddy Brett walked in with a group of my frat brothers. "Cake! Awesome!" He peered into the box. "Dude! Did you eat half a cake yourself?"

I set the cake back down on the desk. "Half the cake was hers."

"Sorry, man." Brett slapped me on the back as another one of the guys swiped a blob of frosting on his fingers.

"Delicious! You going to share? Never drink on an empty stomach."

I grabbed the cake box. "To the kitchen. For forks. Let's polish this thing off before we go."

The clock struck midnight as we reached the kitchen. The guys sang "Happy Birthday" and made short work of the cake. And the milk the cook had left in the fridge. No one seemed to notice that I didn't have a bite. When there were nothing but crumbs left, we grabbed our coats and headed out to the first bar, the one that was on the edge of Greek Row.
 

We'd just reached the sidewalk when a group of Double Deltsies turned the corner and came up the street on the opposite side. My heart lurched. Morgan was in front, laughing, stumbling in incredibly sexy shoes, and wearing her birthday run sign.

She was so damned beautiful. I swore beneath my breath, remembering everything I had planned for our joint birthdays. One day off sobriety and she was already drunk.
 

She glanced at me and looked away like she hadn't seen me. I knew she had. Damn it. As president of the house, I should have been giving her the birthday drink. I'd had it planned—all the guys would be waiting to sing her happy birthday. She'd show off the lavalier I'd given her. The guys would welcome her like a sister. We'd party into the wee hours.
 

I recognized Alexis, Kelly, Kayla, Victoria, and most of the others. It was obvious they had no intention of coming to the house for a birthday drink.

"Fucking stuck-up Double Deltsies!" Brett slapped me on the back. "We don't need them."

Maybe not. But I sure as hell wanted Morgan. I missed her. She'd left a hole in my heart in a way my breakups with Jordan never had.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Morgan

Victoria drove me to the courthouse on Monday to retrieve my driver's license. Dakota and I had planned to go together. Now I crossed my fingers I didn't run into him. And at the same time, prayed desperately that I did.
 

I hadn't found a way to get him out of my mind, especially since I'd seen him heading out for his birthday bar run. And looked the other way. Because my heart was breaking and I couldn't stand it. Because I'd been drunk, which made me more emotional than usual. And I was tired of crying, especially on my birthday, when all my sisters were trying to cheer me up.

Victoria understood my mood in almost the same way a biological twin would. She was hellbent on distracting me from my depressed, weepy thoughts. "Now that you're off social probation, have you thought about who you're going to invite to the crush event week after next?"