Crazy Bitch (Bitches and Queens) (25 page)

Willow walked over slowly and
sat down beside her. Reaching for Hannah’s hand, she whispered, “You don’t have
to try at all. I fell in love with you in the middle of a subway in Paris, but
I was too afraid to admit it. I’ve never known anyone as…” Willow paused to
think of the right word, “…unique as you.”

“Unique?” Hannah chuckled
through her tears. “That’s one way to describe me.”

Willow reached up and stroked
her cheek. Growing very serious, she said, “Don’t ever do this to me again,
Hannah. No more lies. No more games. Promise me now.”

“I promise,” Hannah whispered.
She brought Willow’s palm to her lips. Closing her eyes, she kissed it softly
and then whispered, “I want out.”

“What?” Willow rushed.

“I’ve been at the mercy of people
who detest me since I was three days old. First, the orphanage and then my
adopted parents. When I started modeling, I thought it would be different. In
the beginning, everyone loved me, and I believed that I had finally found some
place where I belonged. Then I slipped up. A reporter yelled something crude in
front of Sam. Honestly, what mother wants to be spoken to like some
street-corner hooker in front of their child? I reacted and they have hated me
ever since, but they wouldn’t let me go. I’ve tried to leave it behind several
times, but they always find me and drag my reputation through the mud. So, I
just thought if I told them the most horrible rumor possible, they would finally
hate me enough to let me go.”

“It was you?” Willow asked in
shock. “You leaked the story to the press.”

“Yes, it was me,” Hannah
admitted. “But that didn’t make it any easier. I have spent my entire life
trying to conceal what I am and seeing the truth brandished about everywhere
like a scrumptious bit of gossip was devastating.”

“Then why are we here? Why did
you come back?”

“I had to come back because…”
Hannah stopped and took a deep breath to gather her courage. “…I sold the line
to Gustuv under the condition that you retain complete creative control over
all your designs.”

“You did what?” Willow
muttered.

“I know this is your dream, and
I’ll do anything I can to support you, but I can’t be a part of that world
anymore because it makes me miserable. I chose him because I believe the two of
you are very like-minded, and will be very compatible, professionally speaking.
Can you forgive me?”

“Of course,” Willow answered.
What
was there to forgive?
She couldn’t expect Hannah to be a part of something
that made her so unhappy, but her mind was still reeling. Only a few hours ago,
she thought Hannah believed they were sisters. Now she knew that wasn’t true,
but she still didn’t know what Hannah wanted. She sounded very much like she
wanted to build a life with her, which was something Willow had wanted since
their first trip to Paris. But Willow wanted, no
needed
, a real
relationship where they would come together as equals—not as doll maker and
toy.

“I won’t get back into that
tub,” Willow declared firmly. “I won’t be the plaything you use to chase your
demons away.”

Hannah blinked in surprise.
Tilting her head to the side, she smiled softly. “The water wasn’t meant for
you. It was for me.”

“You?” Willow questioned
warily.

“It isn’t a game,” Hannah
insisted with a gravelly voice. Squeezing her eyes shut for a moment, when she
opened them again fresh tears fell down her cheeks. “Before he started taking
pictures, she would never look at me. And I didn’t understand why. In Russia,
they wouldn’t tell me why I was different nor was I allowed to see the other
children without clothes. I only knew that there was something very wrong with me,
but I didn’t know what it was. Then one night a few weeks after we came home, I
became violently ill. I tried to clean up the mess, but it was everywhere—on my
pajamas, in my hair. She must have had heard me because she came into my room.
When she saw the mess, she started screaming, crying, and dragged me to the
bathtub. Once I was naked, she pointed between my legs and raged that I was a disgusting
freak and only nasty perverts could stand the sight of me naked. She said I was
a horrible, selfish bitch for making her see it. She made me hate my body that
night, and I have hated it ever since. And I believed her too. I believed that
no sane, normal person could ever stand the sight of me naked. So, I always
watched other people making love and never participated because I was
terrified. I still am. Every time we made love, I was petrified that you would
open your eyes and see me as I have always seen myself—a disgusting, vile
freak.”

“That will never happen,”
Willow said.

“I want to believe you. I
really do,” Hannah whispered. “In Sedona, they said that no medicine or surgery
could fix my mental body image. Before I could address my gender-identification
issues, I had to stop seeing myself as a freak. If I wanted to maintain a
healthy relationship with someone else, I had to trust that they wouldn’t see
me as that either.”

“I don’t, Hannah! I swear, I
don’t, and I never will,” Willow pleaded.

“I decided I needed to go back to
the beginning and, if you would be willing, I need you to look at me and touch
me. I need to learn to trust that you can do that without be sickened.”

Several minutes later, Hannah
sat naked in the water, hugging her knees to her chest as she sobbed. Willow
was on her knees beside the bathtub, softly humming a quiet tune as she lathered
the shampoo through Hannah’s platinum locks of wet hair.

“Are you all right?” Willow
asked.

“No.”

“Do you need me to stop?”

“No, please don’t,” Hannah
choked through her tears. It was impossible for her describe how she felt—only
that she became suddenly aware of the huge, gaping hole in her soul. It was
from there that the demons slipped through to her reality. Now, Willow was
filling it with her touch, her hands, and her sweet song. She was giving her
back all that had been stolen, all that had been denied.

Hannah was so very happy that
it was Willow filling her with her wild, bohemian essence because she loved her
so very much. She also knew that she couldn’t be magically healed with a single
washing. It would be a slow process because her fragile mind could only accept
little pieces at a time. Right then, she had more pressing concerns to attend
to.

After Willow rinsed her hair,
Hannah sat up and wiped her eyes. Then, moving with lightning speed, she pulled
Willow, who was fully clothed, into the water with her.

Sputtering with surprised,
Willow gasped, “You’re cheating.”

“I am not,” Hannah declared as she
pulled the wet shirt over Willow’s head. “I never said you couldn’t drag me
into the tub—only that I wouldn’t get in willingly.”

“That’s still cheating by
default,” Willow laughed.

Her trousers proved a bit
trickier and required a great deal more splashing, but eventually she was freed
of clothing. Sitting up with her legs wrapped around Hannah’s waist, their lips
crashed together, their tongued entwined. Willow inched closer until Hannah’s
cock was fully embedded inside her. Tearing her mouth away, Willow groaned, “Oh
God, I’ve missed you so much.”

Hannah smiled against her
nipple before she pulled it between her lips.

Surrounded and filled by
Hannah, Willow shattered and clenched her so tight that Hannah soon followed.

“Obviously,” Hannah moaned
breathlessly as she fell back against the tub with Willow in her arms.

After several moments, Willow
leaned up, “Sorry, I had a lot of pent-up energy.”

“Then I guess it’s a good thing
we don’t have to leave for a few weeks.”

“Did you pack your toys?”

“Maybe, why do you ask?” Hannah
answered.

“First, you need to understand
something,” Willow said. “I love you very much. More than I ever have anyone
else or will ever again. It’s important that you remember that because for the
next few weeks I will be fucking you into oblivion. By the time I’m done with
you, you won’t be strutting anywhere any time soon.”

“Is that a promise?” Hannah
giggled.

“Oh, definitely.”

Six Years Later

“Get in this house right now.
Both of you!” Hannah hissed from the French door that opened to the back patio,
just as her phone began ringing. Answering, her features softened and her voice
grew sultry, “Hey, sexy woman.”

“Hey yourself. What are you
doing?” Willow asked.

“At the moment, I am chasing
after
your
twins,” Hannah answered.

“My twins?”

“When I turn my back for two
seconds and find them prancing in the backyard without a stitch of clothing,
they are definitely your twins. I never played naked outdoor games as a little
girl.”

Her little darlings ran
giggling through the door. First came Kenyon, the eldest by three and a half
minutes. He was a raven-hired angel with sparkling green eyes, and was all boy—as
rough and tumble as they come, which was something of a refreshing surprise as
neither Willow nor the twins’ biological father was particularly butch. Next
came McKenna, with her white-blond hair and smoky green eyes, she looked so
much like Sam that at times it was frightening. She pouted just like him too.

In Sam’s defense, he had
finally grown into a man. Sam had been one of those children that required a
whole damn village to raise. Hannah would never say it aloud, because bickering
with his wife was one of her favorite past times, but Kate had been wonderful
for him. He still didn’t always show the best judgment, like the time the twins
spent the weekend with their older brother so she and Willow could go away for their
anniversary. Although he was very much aware of McKenna’s princess complex, Sam
decided to spend the entire weekend playing dress-up. As what? Princesses, of
course. Now, her four-year-old daughter refused to leave the house without one of
her gowns, a rhinestone crown, and matching heels. Hannah drew the line at
mascara, and no amount of whining or crying had made her change her mind.

“Are the twins close by?”
Willow asked.

“Why?” Hannah questioned
suspiciously. “What’s going on?”

“Hannah, my water broke.”

“What?” Hannah screeched. “That
baby isn’t due for another three weeks! You’re just going to have to cross your
legs for the next twenty-one days and keep her inside,” she screamed and then
took a deep breath. “All right, I’m better now. We’ll be at the office in a few
minutes to pick you up.”

“I’m already at the hospital,”
Willow said.

“You drove yourself to the
hospital? What were you thinking? Have you lost your freaking mind?” Hannah
shouted.

“I’m fine,” Willow declared.

“Have you called Sam and Kate?”

“They are already on their way.”

“We’ll be there in ten minutes.
Don’t you dare start pushing without me,” Hannah warned. Then added, sounding
only slightly less irritated, “Love you.”

“Love you too. See you in a
few.”

Perhaps some women might have
crumbled under the pressure, but not Hannah. She dressed the twins, who were
both getting a little fussy because they had to delay their lunch, packed
Willow’s bag, and gathered Consuela, who unknowingly had just become their
sitter while Hannah stayed with Willow during the birth. She did it all in less
than three minutes, leaving them seven minutes to get across town to the
hospital.

Hannah always knew that if she
was given the opportunity, she would be a perfect mommy. She was so good that
she had already penned two bestselling novels about her life with the twins.
These days, most everyone had forgotten Hannah Fairbanks. Now she was known as
Hannah Mallory, mommy extraordinaire.

Her only regret with motherhood
was that she couldn’t carry babies. Hannah was certain she would have been a
divine pregnant goddess, but knocking up Willow was the next best alternative. Knowing
how important it was to Hannah, Willow had opened her body, mind, and soul.
Every thought, every feeling, every sensation she felt during the entire nine
months, she shared with Hannah. They were so connected that Hannah felt the
first flutters of life inside Willow’s womb before she did. It was during that time,
while they shared the lives they were bringing into this world together, that
the tiny cracks inside Hannah’s soul were finally sealed. There simply wasn’t
any room for demons or monsters of the past. The birth of her children was the
rebirth of her.

 In between raising her twins,
writing her books, and volunteering with several groups and organizations, her
life was filled and bursting at the seams, but after a long conversation with
Willow, they both decided that there was still room for more. Hannah was so
excited about this next phase in her life that she could hardly contain
herself. Unfortunately, not everyone in the family shared her enthusiasm.

As Hannah was merging on the
highway, she heard Kenyon, who was in the backseat, say to McKenna, “Quit being
a butthole.”