CORAL - Forever (A Romance Trilogy, Book 3) (51 page)

“Sorry?” I ask, bemused.

“Darling, she knows about Susannah’ – “How?” I gasp.

“It was in The Argus darling.”
Jeez, bad news really does
travel fast!

“Oh crap!” I groan, holding my head in my hand. “What does
it say?” I ask.

“That you were there when it happened. And Gladys, well you
know what she’s like, she’s on her way over to you.”

“What?” I screech. “No! Joyce, I can't...I can't handle this
right now!” I stop, gritting my teeth and trying to choke back the stupid ass
tears.

“Why Coral? Whatever’s the matter?” Joyce asks her tone soft.

“I...” I can't speak. And I’m not even sure I want to share
either.

“Darling would you like me to come over?” She softly adds.

“Please Joyce, that would be...” I stop again and take a
deep breath.

“I’ll see you in five,” she says and hangs up.

God damn it! –
I cannot have Gladys over here now. I
need to call her, calm her down. Feeling beyond tired, I pick up my coffee and
take a quick sip, then I call Malcolm’s number, but I already know I’m too
late, I can hear Gladys shouting upstairs.

“Hello Coral,” he says. I swear he’s rolling his eyes.

“I’m in the garden,” I tell him. “And can you please ask Mom
to keep her voice down! Tristan was working late, he’s still sleeping,” I hiss.

“No problem Coral.” Malcolm hangs up and the shouting
quickly stops –
Thank god!

I sigh, curl my hands around my coffee cup and sit sipping
it. I see Gladys appear in my peripheral vision, she makes me laugh when she’s
mad; especially when she is walking fast and wobbling all over the place. Stopping
in front of me, her face like thunder, her hands on her hips, she opens her
mouth to begin, but I quickly cut in – “Mom!” I shout, holding my hand up to
stop her.

“I know you’re upset, but it was my choice to go and see
Susannah, no-one else’s. I am a grown woman who will do what she wants, when
she wants to do it. You gave me a chance at a good life, a wholesome life.
Can't you understand that I wanted the same for Susannah? She lost her baby, and
her husband died in Iraq; he was the love of her life Gladys. Your husband only
left you, but I’m guessing it still devastated you?” I question.

“Well, yes of course it did’ – “Imagine he hadn’t left, and
like John, he suddenly died. Try to imagine what that would have felt like.
Because I’m guessing it would have felt a trillion times worse. I wanted to
help Susannah, give her a second chance. You taught me that, that people screw
up and you have to forgive them and give them another chance.”
Hmm, maybe
that’s what I should do with Tristan?

“Coral Stevens! That has nothing to do with this. Joyce
hasn’t gone postal because John died has she?” She screeches.

I shake my head in exasperation.
I don't need this right
now!

Gladys continues. “She was unstable Coral! Can't you
understand that I didn’t want you anywhere near her? What if she tried to...to
do something to you when she killed herself, what if she attacked you? She
tried it once before, almost killed you for goodness sake! And if she’d have
succeeded, then no, absolutely not, I would not have given her a second chance.
Do you think rapists and murderers deserve second chances?”

I wince at her words. “No!” I bite.

“Well then!” She huffs, puffing her cheeks out. Malcolm
appears with two cups in his hand.

“Good morning Coral.” He smiles apologetically at me as he
passes Gladys her coffee.

I try to smile at him. “Mom, apart from coming over here to
shout at me, is there anything else you are here for? – Because I have a hell
of a lot going on today!” I say trying not to shout.

“Oh well...no,” she says, sipping her drink. “Well, apart
from wanting to see you, make sure you’re alright.” I grit my teeth and stare straight
ahead. “So are you alright?” She asks.

“Fine! Thanks for asking,” I bite sarcastically.

“Oh Coral, I’m sorry,” she says, softening a little. “Did
she really...you know...in front of you?”

God damn it!

“Darling, I don't think that’s something Coral wishes to
recall.” Malcolm softly says.

I half smile at him –
Thank you Malcolm!

“No....well...I suppose not,” Gladys says. “Are you alright
though darling?” She asks again in her soft mothering tone.

I almost crumble. “Yes Mom, I’m fine,” I sigh. “And I’m
sorry for snapping at you.”

“Well, I’m sorry for shouting....” Malcolm seems to be
prompting her. “And well, for not listening before judging,” she adds, taking
another sip.
Whoa!

“It’s ok, I understand your point of view,” I tell her,
trying not to sound too gloomy. Maybe I should just go and wake Tristan up. I
hate not knowing what’s going to happen between us!

“Darling, we must be going,” Malcolm says. “Off to collect
the family, I’ve put them up at the Hilton, didn’t want them being late
tomorrow,” he explains, his eyes twinkling brightly.

Right – tomorrow!
“I’ll see you out,” I say getting
to my feet – I need more coffee!

At the door I say my goodbyes and leave it open as I see Joyce
arriving in her car, they both beep their horns and wave as they pass one
another. Joyce smiles warmly at me as she pulls up and steps out of her car, I
try to smile back at her. As usual she looks like she’s just stepped out of the
salon, perfect nails, hair and make-up. She’s wearing a fine, cream silk
trousers suit, that just makes her look – wow!
How does she do that?

“Darling,” she says walking towards me, arms open wide. I
fall into them and manage, somehow, to keep the tears at bay. Joyce goes to
pull back, but I grip her tighter, not wanting to let go. I suddenly realise
that between Joyce and Gladys leaving (although Gladys isn’t now) it’s Joyce
who I’ll miss the most, much more than Gladys. I try to understand why that is?
Gladys is my mother, Joyce my aunty, and I love them both unconditionally.

Then it hits me, Joyce is my inspiration. She is a
headstrong business woman; a woman I have always admired, and I will always
feel indebted to her. Joyce gave me a job, a vocation, and she may not realise
it, but her no nonsense attitude is what kept me on the straight and narrow.

“Come along now, you’re made of tougher stuff!” Joyce says,
squeezing me one more time. Then she pulls back so she can assess me. “I see I
was too late,” she says, gesturing to Gladys and Malcolm.

I roll my eyes. “Yeah...but it’s her way of showing she
cares,” I say.

“Yes, she does.” Joyce smiles.

“Would you like a drink? I ask, trying for upbeat and
failing miserably.

“Tea please Coral.” I smile, feels like I’m back at work. Joyce
follows me into the kitchen and sits on one of the breakfast stools. “Now,” she
says in a very business-like manner. “Let’s talk.”

I quickly whip my head round to her and silently shake my
head. I don't want anyone to overhear our conversation Then I mouth
‘downstairs’ to her. Joyce nods once understanding.

When I’ve made her pot of tea, and placed all the essentials
onto a tray, I add my coffee cup and we head out into the bright, sunlit day.
We sit on the large outdoor sofa, the same one George and I sat on.

“So, I guess you know that Tristan and I had a fight last
night?” I ask, taking a sip.

“Yes.” Joyce says, sipping her tea.

I grit my teeth in frustration. “I think we’re through,” I
say.

“Nonsense!” Joyce quips.

I turn and look at her, feeling surprised. “He said so
Joyce! And to be quite honest, I don't think I want to be with him either, not
after the way he shouted at me!”

“Coral, we all say things we don't mean in the heat of the
moment. Goodness, John and I...we had some terrible fights, but we always knew
that the love would still be there, no matter how bad the fight was, or what we
said, or how hurt we were; we always came back to one another.”

I frown at the floor. “So he told you what happened?”

“Briefly.”

“I can't believe he stayed out so late – and got so drunk!”
I add.

“Late?” Joyce questions.

“Um yeah...he didn’t get back till gone three and he was
really drunk,” I scoff.

“Three?” Joyce gasps.

“Wasn’t he with you?” I ask my eyes wide with fear.
If he
wasn’t then who was he with?

“Coral, you always think the worst!” Joyce says a little
exasperated. “He came over at around eight-ish and left after midnight, but I’m
sure he was alone for the rest of the night. Probably avoiding coming home to
you because he’d walked out on you, he did say he wasn’t feeling too good about
doing that.”

“Oh!” I look down at my cup again.

“Darling girl, you have to start learning to trust, and not
worry so much. Yes, he was angry that you didn’t tell him what your plans were,
especially as it involved Susannah, but I think you’ll find that he was much
more upset with the fact that you were there, alone when she...” Joyce trails
off.

“You think?” I squeak.

Joyce titters at me. “Coral, how on earth can you be
thinking such silly thoughts and have so much doubt when you’re marrying him
tomorrow?”

I shrug, I have no answer for that.

“You still think you’re unworthy,” Joyce says.
How does
she know this?

I stare ahead. I think I’ll always feel like that.

“You’re not,” she says, leaning over and squeezing my hand.

“I’m an idiot!” I bite. “I don't deserve him.”

“Yes you do,” Joyce firmly retorts.

“Yeah well...maybe I do. But right now, I’m just...angry!” I
shake my head and drink more coffee.

“You’ve changed,” Joyce says, completely throwing me.

“I have?” I squeak.

“Yes Coral, in so many ways,” Joyce sighs, an old memory
ignited in her eyes. “It always made me so unhappy seeing you putting on such a
brave face, even though I knew you were in turmoil. How I wished I could take
whatever it was away for you, so when you smiled, I could see that you were
genuinely happy. John and I wondered about it often, trying to work out what we
could do that would help you. But we both knew it had to come from you, that
hopefully, someday you would be free of whatever it was that made you so sad.”

“You knew I was sad?” I say, feeling shocked.

“Coral, you’re not that hard to read. For others yes, they
probably wouldn’t realise the difference between your fake smiles and your
genuine ones, but I did, and still do. Anyway, my point is that I think you
have found whatever it was that you needed to free yourself of whatever it was
that was haunting you.” I swallow hard. “Am I right darling?”

I look up at her. Poor Joyce, all this time so worried about
me. I decide, as I did with Rob and Debs to tell Joyce why.

“Yes Joyce, you are right. I have found what I needed, and I
found it in Tristan. Easiest way to explain it, and as simple as it may sound,
he broke down my walls, my barriers if you like. He’s set me free, but I would
like to share with you why I used to feel like that, if that’s ok?”

Joyce leans across and squeezes my hand again. “Only if you
want to darling.”

“I do,” I tell her firmly then give Joyce a very brief story
of my past. When I’ve finished, I look up at Joyce, expecting a telling off for
not telling her sooner, but I’m gobsmacked to see she doesn’t look surprised or
shocked like Rob or Debs did.

“You knew?” I question.

“No, not knew, but had my own suspicions. I was hoping I was
wrong.” Joyce takes my hand again and stares ahead for a while.

“Tristan said that you said that I’m...challenging?”

“Well you are!” Joyce titters. “You’re the most mercurial
person I know,” she adds, sipping more tea.

“What does that mean?” I laugh. I never took any notice in
English lessons!

Joyce raises an eyebrow in surprise. “You don't know?”

“Joyce,” I giggle. “You know I didn’t pay attention in
class!”

“Oh yes, well I suppose not no. Well a mercurial person is
someone who has sudden or unpredictable changes in mood.”

“Oh!” My face falls. I remember Tristan kind of saying that
to me, only he said...
’you really do jump ship don't you’.
..Hmm. “I’m
not proud Joyce,” I say. “And I’m sorry if I was like that with you, especially
at work. I really did try to stay balanced, guess I didn’t always get it
right.” I mumble.

“Coral, don't you understand? If I didn’t want you working
there, no matter what your moods were like, I’d have let you go.”
Whoa!

“But you didn’t?” I squeak.

“No darling I didn’t. Now why don't you tell me what’s
really on your mind?” I sigh inwardly – There’s no hiding from Joyce.

“I’m going to miss you so much,” I croak.

“And I will miss you, but you’re avoiding the question.”

I take another sip of coffee. “I just...I guess after last
night...I can't help questioning if we’re right for each other, all we seem to
have done since I came out of hospital is fight. I just...” I shake my head not
knowing what else to say.

“Wedding jitters,” Joyce titters.

“What?” I half-laugh.

“You’re about to get married Coral. I always hoped this
would happen for you, that you’d find a good man to take care of you like I did
with John. But it doesn’t mean I wasn’t really nervous the day of my wedding. I
was from a working class family, John was upper class, our upbringings were so
very different, and at the time, I felt as though the only thing I was bringing
to our marriage were my university loans. It took John a very long time to
convince me that it didn’t matter, that all he wanted was me. Are you feeling
that way?”

“No. I know Tristan doesn’t care about my financial status
and I don't care about his either. I guess I’m just feeling...” I trail off. I
don't want her to know everything that goes on between Tristan and I, what
happened last night was private, and the only people who can sort it, or end
it, are Tristan and I.