Cooking Up Trouble (15 page)

Darinda laughed. “Yeah, I heard. I'm happy for her and Miguel. For you, though, it's time to pull on your big girl panties and find yourself a man.”

Even big girl panties couldn't work miracles. “Easy enough to say, but I know every man in the entire area. The good ones are taken, and the others . . . well, I've known them too long.”

“We'll think of something.” Darinda reached for the CD player. They sang along to songs she'd recorded on their drive home. And by the time she dropped Tessa back at her front porch, and they'd unloaded all her goodies, Tessa had built up her courage to meet the next challenge in her life, head-on.

T
essa kept herself busy on Tuesday. She worked in the barn in the morning, canning rhubarb jam and freezing rhubarb pies. She had more rhubarb than ever before. She even froze stalks of it to use later. In the evening, she did something she'd never done before. She went online to look at dating sites.

There were more people listed than she'd ever imagined. She'd heard the horror stories, but there were more stories of success. How many miles would she drive to meet someone? And what kind of man did she want to meet? No one, really. She wanted Ian. But he was taken, so she scanned other men's faces and bios. Some sounded good. Some sounded
too
good, but they didn't have black hair and chocolate-brown eyes. Their smiles didn't have a naughty sauciness about them. She turned off the computer with a sigh.

On Wednesday morning, Kayla came for her baking lesson. Tessa decided to start with simple recipes and work their way into more difficult ones. They made square pans of gingerbread and Polish apple cakes. For small, dainty desserts, Tessa taught Kayla how to make tiny cream puffs. They filled a dozen with homemade pastry cream and sprinkled them with powdered sugar. Kayla carried a sampling of each home with her when she left.

“Luther's going to love these.” She held the carriers gently. “What are you going to do with the extras?”

Tessa grinned. “I'm keeping them in the cooler for Grams. She's taking them to church to serve with coffee on Sunday.”

“That's right. You two bake tomorrow, don't you? Do you need me?”

Tessa shook her head. “No, Grams and I can handle the bakery business. I was thinking you and I could bake for Ian, Monday through Wednesday, and Grams and I can bake on Thursday.” She hesitated. “Would it bother you if I hired a high school kid to sell stuff at the farm stand?”

Kayla looked relieved. “No, that way I can spend more time in the gardens.”

“Good, it's settled then. You can bake and do yard work. That will keep you busy enough.”

Kayla left with a happy bounce in her step. Tessa smiled, watching her. Then she called Grams and told her that she needed a teenager to work the stand. Grams knew anyone and everyone. She'd pick the right person. When Ian came for supper, he looked happy, too.

“Damn, it feels good being here. I can relax when I'm with you.” Lily had left in the morning, and she must have kept him busy. He sagged onto a stool at the kitchen island and watched her stir shrimp in a large skillet. “What did you make for me tonight?”

He sounded cocky. “You've been spoiled enough, haven't you? You probably ate out every night with Lily.”

He grinned. “That's restaurant food. It's different. I've missed coming here. Your kitchen is always full of good smells. It's comfortable. I can unwind.”

Her heart did a happy little skip, but she ignored it. She was not Sadie. Ian was off limits. She'd found a few promising men on the dating sites. She'd message them. They'd take her mind off Ian. “I went simple for supper—shrimp scampi over spaghetti and a tossed salad.”

“Perfect.” He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the counter top. “What have you been up to the last few days?” His gaze traveled up and down her body, lingered on her face.

Her insides melted, or at least, that's what it felt like. Ian's gaze could make her pulse do rumbas. Jeez, she'd missed him. She busied herself, tossing the salad, while she told him about Kayla learning to help her in the bakery. She rambled on about Grams getting more tired when they worked together and how Grams was going to have Sunday suppers at her little house in town from now on.

Ian listened to her, hanging on every word she said. His expression clouded. “You're going to miss Grams on Sundays. You two get along so well together.”

“Yeah, but things change. She isn't getting any younger, and she and Miguel are a perfect pair.”

Ian studied her face. “Your grandpa was perfect for her, too, wasn't he? It's hard to find that kind of connection.”

“True. Grams is lucky. She found it twice.”

His voice bleak, Ian asked, “Do you believe a person only has one soul mate, and if they miss their chance to connect with that person, they have to settle for less?”

Tessa blinked. Where had that come from? “I sure hope not. There are a lot of people in the world. It would be hard to find the one and only that was meant for you.”

Ian circled the island to help her dish-up their food. When his arm brushed hers, he turned and looked down at her. Her breath caught in her throat, and she couldn't back away from him. They were too close together.

She gazed into his chocolate-brown eyes, held by the emotion in their depths. He bent his head, and his lips grazed hers. Heat sizzled through her veins, made her nerves sing for more.

He pulled back quickly, and when he spoke, his voice was thick with need. “I can't come here anymore.”

Every fiber in her body wanted to attach itself to his. She had to lock her hands behind her back to keep from reaching for him. She wanted to stand on tiptoe, to crush his mouth with her own. Shame shouted in her mind. She
was
Sadie, no better. If Ian took her in his arms right now, she'd toss thoughts of Lily aside. She'd meet his passion with her own. She took a shaky breath. Oh, how she wanted him. But he'd just said the responsible thing. He couldn't come here anymore.

Trying to keep her voice steady, she asked, “Are you going to open the lodge for business? You won't have time for much of anything then.”

He stepped away from her, shook his head. “Lily decided to move in with me. When I worked in the city, I didn't mind just seeing her on weekends. But here . . .” He looked at Tessa and looked away. “Well, I need to spend more time with her.”

Hurt clotted inside her, settled in a pool of misery in her soul, but she refused to acknowledge it. She'd miss him, but if they kept spending evenings together, they'd both be disappointed in themselves. She forced a smile. “I'm happy for you.”

His brows knit together. “Are you? What are you going to do with your extra time?”

She pointed to the laptop on her kitchen table. “I've watched you and Lily, how happy you are together.” They were, right? “And I've decided I'm missing out. I'm going modern.”

He looked like she'd slapped him. He took a deep breath. “You're going to move in with someone, too?”

She shook her head. “I'm joining some dating sites to try to connect.”

He didn't say anything, just stared out the kitchen window for a minute. Finally, he squared his shoulders and said, “That's good. You'll have to beat guys away. A friend of mine in the city met his wife on a dating service.”

His voice sounded strained. She decided to change the subject. “So, how did the test run go for the lodge?”

“What?”

“The lodge, the guests that spent the weekend . . . how did that go?”

He ran a hand through his dark hair. “Great, everything went great.”

He helped her carry their plates to the sunroom to eat. He sat on one side of the room. She sat a good distance away. They picked at their food until he said, “Well, I'd better go. Lily wants our room redecorated before she moves in Friday night.” He stood and jammed his hands deep in his jeans pockets. “Tess . . .”

She shook her head. “You're one of the best friends I've ever had. I don't want anything to ruin that.”

He pressed his lips into a tight line and gave a curt nod. “I'd better go.” He didn't even stay to help with cleanup. He hurried out the door.

She cleaned the kitchen on autopilot, then did what she rarely allowed herself. She walked to the lake, sat on the shore, and cried until she ran out of tears.

S
he looked like hell on Thursday morning. Grams took one look at her face and shook her head. “I heard. The snot's moving in with him.”

“That's good. I need a reason to keep my distance.”

“Why's that?”

“I don't want to be a Sadie. Ian's too easy to like. And he likes me back.”

“That's a problem?” Grams started measuring ingredients for pie dough. “Look, hon, you and Gary were great friends, but there was no spark between you. It would be like you shacking up with Keavin. You like him. You care about him. So why didn't you two run off together?”

“It's not like that between us, never was. We're just friends.”

“So were you and Gary—friends. Sadie did you a big favor. She saved you from taking the safe route, and she put a lot of pizzazz in Gary's life.”

Tessa stared. “I loved Gary.”

“You love your brother, too. Big deal. I, personally, would want a lot more.”

Tessa dumped a half cup of salt in her cake batter instead of sugar. She stared. A stupid mistake. She went to the sink and dumped the batter. She'd have to start again. “Okay, maybe I need to rethink things, but Ian loves Lily. She has plenty of pizzazz.”

“But they don't have anything in common.” Grandma reached out to stop Tessa's hand before she added salt to her batter again. “Look, kid, a good marriage needs people who share common beliefs
and
share some sizzle. It takes both. You and Gary cared about the same things, but there was no spark, no chemistry. Ian and Lily have lots of chemistry, but nothing in common. Fifty percent isn't enough.”

“They both work hard, play hard,” Tessa said.

Grams sighed. “Look. You don't want to be a homewrecker. I get that, but Lily won't make Ian happy. And vice versa.”

Tessa felt her expression turn mutinous. Her grandmother knew that look. She'd complained about it often. “Ian has to figure that out for himself.”

“Then he's in trouble, because he's like Gary. He wouldn't cheat unless someone helped him along.”

“Sadie.”

“Like I said, Sadie did you a big favor, kid. It didn't feel like it at the time, but she did.”

Tessa went to the cupboard to get cocoa powder. She didn't want to talk about it anymore. Answers that seemed solid now looked like questions. Her mind was a morass of confusion. Grams understood. When Tessa came back, they switched on music and baked like maniacs for the rest of the day.

Before Grams left, she gave Tessa a warm hug. “Hang in there, girl. Life's throwing you a few curves lately. I'd tell you to enjoy the ride, but it's been damn bumpy.” She stopped. “I did help you with one problem, though. I have a new kid hired to help at the stand. Kayla can train him tomorrow.”

Tessa grimaced. “Let me guess. He's moody and his teachers would like to send him to boarding school.”

Grams smiled. “What better recommendations could a kid have?”

She should have known. Grams only took in strays. But if Grams liked the kid, there was something worth working with somewhere. “Okay, I'll see you both tomorrow.”

Tessa stalked to the house and glowered at the familiar setting. She wasn't in the mood to eat alone and stew about Ian. She wasn't in the mood to drive to the diner and answer questions from friends, either. She paced back and forth. Where could she go and just relax? Chase's bar—Mill Pond's sort of nightclub.

She changed into her good jeans and one of her new, flirty tops. She let her thick hair out of its scrunchy, so that it hung loose, and drove to the bar for supper. People called and nodded to her when she walked inside. Evan Meyers and his wife waved her over to eat supper with them. When they'd finished their food, the music started, and Keavin came to ask her to dance. Tessa loved to dance. Once her feet started moving, she turned into an uninhibited, feel-the-beat, wild woman. Men came to drag her onto the dance floor until she fizzled at ten.

“Sorry,” she told Chase Carlton, her last partner. “I have to open the bakery tomorrow morning. I've got to get home and get some sleep. And shouldn't you get back behind the bar?”

“But the next song's a slow one. You can't leave me stranded for that.” Chase pulled her closer. The band took his cue and shifted tempo.

Oh, what the hell? She was having fun. Tessa let him smash her closer as they swayed to the music. Then his hand cupped her ass. Big deal. If that was his thrill for the night, poor him. He knew he wasn't going to get lucky with her, and that's what he was known for. Chase tended bar here and was known as a player. If a woman wanted a good lay, she ordered drinks and flirted with Chase. He'd deserted his post to share two dances with her.

“You're single. I'm single. Why haven't we ever connected?” he whispered in her ear.

“I'd worry about catching a disease.”

He threw back his head and laughed. “I get regular penicillin shots. I stay clean.”

“How romantic. Now you have me interested.”

He grinned. “I've always liked you, Tessa Lawrence. Maybe we should just have a fling.”

“Isn't that what you always do?”

He pulled slightly apart to study her. “I'm getting older. So are you. Maybe we should think about shacking up.”

No wonder the women loved him. Such a way with words. “Yeah, you'd love weeding gardens and pickling vegetables.”

“They say opposites attract.”

She smiled. “That, they do. But they don't last. It's like a chemistry experiment that blows up in your face.”

“Do you have an answer for everything?”

“Annoying isn't it? See? We're not meant for each other.”

He laughed. “Well, I'm going to enjoy it while I can.” He smashed her to him and put both hands on her ass.

Enjoyment worked two ways. It had been a long time since a guy felt her up. Tessa leaned into him and went with it.