Consume Me (A Burning Desire Novel) (42 page)

Alyssa’s words echoed in the back of my
brain.

‘I wish you a life of eternal misery.’…
‘You killed my baby; you killed my sweet angel.’ … ’You’re a whore.’

She’d left me all kinds of angry
voicemails before Jude had convinced to change my number.

I deserved to lose Landon.

I loved him so much.

It was undeniable for me; every time I see
him; my heart stops  beating and then pounds out of my chest. Every time
he looked at me, I felt beautiful and deserving. He was so gentle and
attentive. When we’re together he’d never let go of my hand; he never missed on
an occasion to show me his affection. He was tactile and affectionate.

And the sex; it was celestial.

It was intangible and unexpected.
Sometimes it was angry and intense; other times, it was intimate and soft; but
always passionate. I’d unraveled in him and with him.

Our rules; I was going to miss them most.

He’d captured me; with his eyes and
passion. I was no longer going to be his…

He was going to un-claim me.

I swallowed the throttle in my throat and
pushed the tears that prickled my eyes.

I was
surprised to find myself in front of New York General. I hadn’t been giving any
attention to where we were heading; but didn’t expect a hospital.

I blinked in confusion; but didn’t ask him
what we were doing there.

He stopped the engine and unbuckled his
seatbelt.

I glanced at him from the corner of my
eye. I was too afraid to face him; too humiliated.

Why did he bring me there? I’d rather he’d
let me thank him for getting Jude out and let me go. I couldn’t decipher the
purpose of all that.

Landon turned to me; it was the first time
I’d gazed into his eyes since we’d left the police station.

They were dark; uncommonly angry.

If I’d thought I’d seen him angry all
those times I’d defied his rules or contradicted him; then I’d been furiously
wrong.

His jaw clenched tentatively and
repeatedly.

He had so many things to say; I could tell
by his breathing.

“Wait here.”

He finally ordered and got out of the car.

Landon slammed the car door so hard I’d
thought it would land in my lap and disappeared behind the ER entrance.

What was he doing at the hospital at three
in the morning?

Most importantly, why was he dragging me
there with him?

It was torturing, and demeaning.

When I spotted a cab making its way toward
the entryway; I just jumped out of the car and called after it.

I couldn’t’ care less if they’d stolen the
freakin’ car.

If Landon thought that I wasn’t already
prepared for this; he didn’t knew me at all. I was conditioning a part of me to
what might have happened once Landon would learn about my past.

There was no need for him to drag me
around the city and ignore me for more than an hour.

On top of that, he drags me on whatever
business he had.

I call Jenna to check on where they were.

“Clea I’m so sorry; please forgive me. I
didn’t give it much attention. It was stupid of me; I just selected your
favorite contacts and sent them to the security of the building. I’m so
terribly sorry; I freaked out because, just when I was sending the invitations;
you got home. Are you angry?”

She didn’t give me the chance to say
anything. Her tone was full of guilt and she sounded worried.

“It’s fine Jenna; I knew it must’ve
slipped you. It’s my fault I should’ve deleted him from the list.”

I admitted.

“Where are you?”

I asked quickly.

“I’m still at the penthouse with Simon,
Ryan and Jude.”

I frowned; it was three in the morning.

“Where’s mom?”

“She’s staying with dad at his hotel.”

She announced hesitantly.

I needed to get used to the situation.

“What about you? Should we wait for you or
are you spending the night here? Jude doesn’t want to leave without you.”

“Um… No, I’m in a cab; I’ll meet you
home.”

“Cab? Why are you in a cab? Where’s
Landon?”

I couldn’t hold the tears anymore.

“He dragged me to a hospital; he didn’t
say a word to me Jenna; it’s over.”

“Oh my god Clea; I’m so sorry, but why the
hospital? Are you okay?”

“I don’t know; he’s been ignoring me ever since
we’d gotten out of the police station; and then he stopped us in front of the
hospital and asked me to wait for him. I couldn’t… I can’t… It hurts so much.
It’s over.”

I hung up the phone, unable to speak
another word.

I sobbed all my frustration and sadness.

It was over
.

My phone buzzed; it was Jude.

I breathe in and answer it.

“Boo; which hospital did he take you to?”

I wiped my nose.

“Why?”

“Is it New York General?”

I frowned.

“Yes why?”

“Get back there boo!” He ordered softly;

“Caden is in their ER.” He added.

What?

“Boo can you hear me? Hey listen we didn’t
get the chance to talk; but trust me; you need to get there.”

Jude insisted.

“Now Clea; get back there quickly.”

I didn’t know what was happening; but Jude
urging tone got to me and I asked the driver to turn head back.

“What the hell is going on Jude? Why is
Landon going to see Caden?’

I asked baffled by the whole situation.

“It’s too long to explain; all you have to
know is that Landon was fuming when he heard the story. He didn’t actually ask
questions; he just let me explain the highlights insisting I give you the
chance to explain on your own. However, he’d insisted to know where Caden had
been admitted. I’m sure he went there to see him.”

Oh my god.

“But why?”

My voice was small.

“I don’t know boo; just go and talk to
him.”

He paused.

“He really loves you Clea.”

Jude’s voice was a bare whisper.

“Hold on I have another call.”

It was Landon’s cell; I answered it.

“Where the fuck did you go?”

He rampaged angrily; it made my ears
clang.

“I’m sorry; I’m on my way back. Just two
minutes away.”

My stomach clenched. I had no idea what he
went doing there; I had no idea what was going to happen.

“When will you start listening to me Clea?
For fuck sake; I asked you to wait.”

“I’m sorry.”

I repeated softly.

The hospital building was in my line of
sight; I hung up the phone and got out my card to pay the cab. I was shaking
nervously.

It was chilly; I’d left his jacket in the
car and my backless dress was far from warm.

Landon
pulled the door open and extended his hand to me. I took it
none-too-confidently and got out of the car.

He put his arms around me and swore.

“Fuck Clea; you’re freezing.”

He stroked me; sending warm jolts through
my skin.

“Get inside.”

He ordered softly.

He tugged me inside the car and pulled his
jacket over my shoulders. The gesture made my heart ache. I wanted to know what
was happening with him; with us. Why did he go to see Caden?

More importantly, what did Caden tell him?

He slammed the door gently and strode to
the driver seat. I sat silent for a solid ten minutes; conjuring my mind to
give me a reasonable explanation.

From
what I’d gathered from Jude, he didn’t know everything. I had no freakin’ idea
what he did know. Nevertheless, he had to know that I’d dated my professor, and
that he tried to force himself on me, and went down that night. It went without
saying that Jude must’ve told him about Alyssa and the baby just to explain the
police and ambulance that had barged inside my apartment that night.

I’d
woken up inside an ambulance with Ryan; I felt a pressure around my head. I’d
injured myself pretty badly and with everything that had followed; I passed
out.

Ryan was holding my hand and stroked it gently
shaking endlessly. I’d never seen him that worried. When I tried to speak, he’d
begged me to keep still until we get to the emergency.

In the hospital, I had some stitches and
they asked me to spend the night. When the nurse came inside the room asking
Ryan whether she should bring a rape kit or not; he’d stopped breathing for a
while and turned to me unable to speak the words.

I shook my head weakly; I hadn’t been
raped, I was miraculously saved; but I didn’t know how. Jude came in a while
later. His face was the translation of anger and guilt. I kept passing out and
waking up throughout the whole night; the two of them never left my side.

The
following morning, my injury felt a lot better, less tingling, and pounding.
When I was getting ready to get home, the police came in to ask me some
questions. I’d omitted anything about the attempt of rape at first, which made
Jude go ballistic on me. But they were focused on what happened to Alyssa; and
since I knew nothing; I just explained that I’d gotten outside to my living
room, found her lain in her blood, so I just tried to find the source of the
bleed and woke her up before calling 911.

The next week had been the week of
revelation to me.

Landon
stopped the car in front of his building and walked out to get me out. We rode
inside a silent elevator. He’d ignored me again during the ride. The only thing
he’d said was that my friend had left the penthouse. I just nodded.

Inside the apartment, it was all cleaned
out. Nothing suggested a party had taken place just few hours earlier; but then
again, it was probably better that way. It had been one of the happiest
birthday I had in five years; I had a joyful mother, Jenna was living with me;
Jude, Ryan, friends and colleagues. It was perfect.

Landon. My happiness had actually
everything to do with him.

I got upstairs to the master bedroom to
pick up the rest of my things. I was resigned to just talk to him and leave.

I picked up my coat from the walk-in
closet; images of what we’d done inside it earlier haunted me.

It was only then that I noticed women
clothing. Not just some clothes that had been forgotten by some girlfriends of
Landon.

Dresses, shirts, jeans, handbags and a
wide collection of shoes hogged half the space; all women’s. I blinked in
disbelief.

How hadn’t I noticed it earlier?

One of the waiters had taken my coat when
I‘d first arrived; and when I came up there with Landon, he’d ordered me to
turn against the wall and stilled me there.

It was intense, sexy, and mind-blowing.

I searched for my coat between the endless
lines of outwear. They were all new; all tagged and untouched.

“Do you like it?”

I jumped up to the voice of Landon behind
me; he swooped my curls to the side and brushed my bare back.

Jolts of electricity ran through me and
made me alert to his breathing, his touch.

“You’ve been ignoring me.”

I shut my eyes close feeling his thumb
traveling down arm.

“I know.”

He breathed out.

“It hurts.”

I whispered; unsure whether or not I
should’ve exposed myself to him despite everything.

“I know.”

He conceded again and pressed a kiss to
the back of my neck.

“I think we need to establish a new rule.”

I frowned.

A new rule? What for?

I swallowed hard trying to form the words
in my head.

“You’re not breaking up with me?”

I entertained the thought that if he
wanted to make a new rule; then he might not break up with me.

Landon turned me to face him.

He scooped up my chin and brought me at
eye level with him.

A frown dressed the center of his
eyebrows.

“Break up with you?”

He mirrored my words; his tone
incredulous.

“Do you have any idea what you mean to me
Clea Dane?”

His eyes turn dark, his voice stern and a
little angry.