Confessions of a teacher: Because school isn't quite what you remember it to be... (13 page)

- "Do you think that alone made Hilary apply elsewhere?"

- "Not exactly. Things between her and Peter were already becoming a bit too obvious. Rhona told me she's been looking for a change of scenery for a while now, but what happened in France will have prompted her to be a bit more pro-active."

- "I guess you're probably right."

- "Besides, you know what this place is like. Nothing gets kept as a secret once it's out in the open. If it was just us, we might have managed to keep it within these walls, but the kids aren't daft. They knew what was going on. They'll have told their parents by now and it's only a matter of time before Hilary's husband and Peter's wife find out about it."

On that point, I have to agree with Lea. Peter and Hilary's respective marriages are on the verge of an open and irrevocable crisis.

One week rolls into the next and both sides of the equation, students and teachers, are so exhausted that we can no more but pretend any meaningful learning is taking place. What is probably the last memo of the year informs us that the 33 period week will not be implemented next session as the company has failed to deliver the results of the consultation on time. Funny, considering they can tell you the results of an election overnight! I strongly suspect that the results didn't match the intended outcome and we'll no doubt have round two of the battle next year. Meanwhile, the head is busy appointing new comers loyal to his cause, as a few retirements have opened new vacancies in the KGB team. Stuart's arse-licking has paid off and he's been duly appointed by his master. Darth Vader is slowly surrounding himself with faithful servants. The last week of term descends upon us in a mix of depletion and expectancy: We are so near, yet so far from freedom! The last few days always seem the longest and only on the last day, when no one cares any longer and the handful of kids still attending are entertained by the film industry, do we get the sense that we have made it. This moment has come and there are no greater pleasure than the cheerful goodbyes coming out of every lips. At long last the farce is over for another six weeks and the curtain can finally come down.

Conclusion.

There is no doubt in my mind that secondary education is one of the most mysterious, energetic and hilarious environment to be plunged into. What goes on in the playground is replicated and amplified in the staff room. The most insignificant mischiefs take incommensurable proportions. Gossips become news-worthy and relationships boil over for no apparent reason, only to be rekindled some time later for no further apparent reason. The rich and wonderful life of a teacher moves rhythmically between school bells and holidays. Despite all their quirkiness, I have the utmost respect for my fellow teachers. Why? Because they have one common denominator: they care. They care about the kids realising their potential. They care, sometimes beyond the call of duty. If there is failure in the education system it is not due to bad teachers. Sure there are some, but very few. Most of those who are not cut out for the task leave the profession very early on and for some of them, before they even start. If education doesn't deliver its promises, it's because other more powerful parties have their own agenda: money, public image, etc. Invariably, teachers are caught in the crossfire. They know what should be done but their hands are tied and their mouths are gagged. More than ever before, the powers that rule have succeeded in stifling all creativity in professionals who can no longer recognise themselves as such. Everything we do is scrutinised, controlled and manipulated.

On a more intimate note, I learned some year later that my theory about Ross Hall was correct. He did eventually settle the issue of his sexuality and is now living with his partner. I now understand better Ross' attitude towards Dora: caught as he was between what was expected of a straight guy and his true sexual calling which he hadn't yet dared acknowledge, even to himself. As for Dora, she was married that very summer and cradling a baby girl in her arms seven months later. Hilary had made the right move by moving to an other school and she's working hard at piecing together her shaky relationship with her husband. Peter wasn't so lucky and his wife filed for a divorce shortly after the French trip. I've heard on the grapevine that Peter salvaged the house out of the divorce settlement and has now opted for an uneventful sentimental life. Instead, he's decided to put all his wood to good use and finish building the garden shed once and for all. As far as I'm concerned, the air in secondary education landscape is no longer breathable and I have given myself two more years to somehow work my way out of it. I even have in my head what will happen on my last day after handing in my resignation: My husband will come to pick me up with Alice cooper's 'School's out ' blaring out of the car stereo. With that grandiose departure, with every one watching us, mouths gaping and eyes goggling from every windows and doors in the building, we'll head straight for the airport and jet off to some exotic destination. Who knows, we might even stage the first of many faked engagement proposals...

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