Compulsion: Magnetic Desires (13 page)

"C
lo was gone when I woke up." Orion sits down and tugs at the tie around his neck trying to loosen it. "I was pretty pissed off about that. In one night, she'd blown me wide open. Hell, I'd always known I loved her, but after that night I could never go back to being just friends. Fuck that shit for a joke. For years, I'd settled for what she would give me, but now I needed it all."

April 2011

If the sheets hadn’t been crumpled, I might have thought it had been a dream. My head pounded, and the sun streaming in through the wooden slats of the bedroom blinds made me wince. I'd fallen asleep with my lips pressed to the top of her head and had expected to wake up that way too. Had I thought one night would be enough to wash away the issues that had almost kept her out of my arms even then?

Dragging my ass to the bathroom, I took care of necessities. Afterward, standing in front of the basin, I rinsed my face with cold water. My eyes were bloodshot, and the water did nothing to ease the pain in my head or the tension that settled in my jaw. Painkillers and a gallon of water would kick it, but I'd be useless until then. I picked my jeans up from the floor where they had landed the night before and pulled them on. Her clothes should have been there too, next to mine.

Popping pills, I shuffled into the living room and sunk into the aged leather couch. My stomach heaved, and I waited for it to settle before I lay down on the couch and checked my phone. The battery was almost dead, and I reached over the side of the couch to plug in the charger. Staring at the screen saver, a picture of her and me from years ago, I wished I'd gotten one of her last night to update it with. Though the way she looked, and the feel of her bare skin was etched permanently in my mind, and on my palms. Even while I waited for her to message me, I knew she wouldn't.

She was embarrassed, or worse, regretting our night together. Remote control in hand, I flipped between channels and settled on car racing. I could never regret what happened between us. Hell, I could only regret not making it happen sooner, back before Zack fucked her over. Shutting my eyes, I listened to the motors hum. The smell of her lingered on my skin, and I picked up the phone to call her. Or, maybe it would be better to message her, just to make sure she was okay. My thumb hovered over the send button, indecisive. How much had last night changed for us?

I dropped the phone onto the floor. No matter how much I wanted to talk to her, I had to play it cool. She needed time to wrap her head around the shifting of our friendship. Patience, I reminded myself, have patience.

There was a knock on the front door, and I stumbled to my feet. Had she decided she wanted more and come back? Mike stood on the step when I opened the door. My shoulders slumped, and I returned to the couch. His visit wasn’t a surprise, though I had forgotten we were meeting up this morning.

"You look awful." Mike took a seat in the armchair, and took up tapping his fingers on the leather.

With a grunt I flipped channels on the TV.

"Big night then?"

Another grunt, and the picture on the TV changed again.

"That good, huh?"

Another grunt. New picture.

"What was her name?" Mike prodded.

"Clo."

The silence stretched out between us. He knew enough to let the conversation drop. I’d never spoken to Mike about my feelings for her. Except for Birdie, and that drunken night with Mellie, I'd kept them to myself. From the moment my two best friends had become a couple, which I was almost positive had been on that first car ride, Mellie and Mike had shared everything. Whatever I told her that night, he knew too.

"I guess you're not up to working on the house today, then?" Mike settled into the armchair, as if he wasn’t planning to leave.

I ran my hands over my face. "I don't think I can. This hangover is killing me."

Mike nodded, and we sat in silence watching cars go round a track on the TV.

When the race finished, I escorted Mike out, my stomach growling as I mentally searched through the contents of my fridge. He bounded down the steps and onto the drive before turning to me. "What are you going to do about Clo?"

I’d asked myself that question so many times. "No fucking idea."

I stayed on the step until Mike got into his car and drove away, then I went in search of something to fill my empty stomach. While I cooked eggs and bacon, I pondered the question. The answer eluded me, the same as it always did. Last night I’d had a plan, but it appeared that had backfired on me. Every time I got somewhere, she changed the game plan. How was I going to win her over when she wouldn’t come willingly?

Standing at the counter, I ate the greasy food. It sat heavily in my stomach but eased the dregs of the hangover.

With coffee in hand, I wandered back into the living room. A game of college football had started, and I listened to it as my eyelids fluttered closed. The first rays of morning had filtered into the bedroom before I'd finally given in to sleep last night. Each moment with her, even when she was tucked into me, snoring lightly, had been more important than any amount of sleep. It had been the best night of my life.

"I
gave her space to get used to the idea of what our friendship could be. Not that I was willing to let her go, but pushing her would have sent her running. I didn’t have to wait long before she came to me, wanting what I would willingly give her. As always, I didn’t say no, but this time I was going to make her say yes to everything I wanted."

April 2011

I kicked off my steel-capped work boots in the laundry and shed my clothes. It had been a long week. Stuffing my work clothes in the washing machine, I set the cycle and stalked buck naked to the bathroom. There hadn't been a peep from Clo since she'd left after our night together, and I was starting to believe I wouldn't hear from her. It didn't help we’d gone from three or four texts a day to absolute silence and that I couldn't stop thinking about her. Longer hours on site hadn't helped block her from my mind either. All I'd managed was to wear myself out, but even that didn't help when I was lying in bed with my mind filled with her. Even in my dreams there was no escape. Each night, I held her in my arms, and each morning I woke up without her. The weekend would be worse, the days as bad as the nights.

Stepping into the shower, I twisted the tap and let the spray soak my face. I wouldn't last the weekend. After today, I'd stop letting her dictate the terms of our relationship. This bullshit between us had gone on far too fucking long for me to let her go. I scrubbed the dust and grit from my body and massaged the knotted muscles in my neck.

I'd given her years, and my patience waned, but if she threw our friendship away would I ever get over it? My gut clenched tight, and I shut off the water. The only thing I could do was make sure I convinced her she wanted me as much as I needed her. Snatching up a towel, I headed to the bedroom to get dressed. My behavior was to the point of obsessive as I checked my phone again. I scoffed at the irony of my acting the same way those women I’d seen hanging on their phones did while they waited for that man they were hoping liked them to send them a text. Tossing my phone on the bed, I went to the kitchen to reheat leftovers from the night before. The shrill sound of my phone ringing grew louder and I rushed to retrieve it. Birdie’s name flashed on the screen.

"How are you two love birds?" She giggled.

I hadn’t talked to her since last weekend, which meant she didn’t know Clo wasn’t talking to me.

"I have no fucking clue." I shoved my hand through my hair. Any minute now Birdie would call me an idiot, and she’d be correct.

She remained silent on the other end for longer than I liked. "What do you mean you have no clue?"

Pounding on my door caught my attention. "Give me a second."

Taking the phone with me, I raced to open the door. Clo stood on the step, hugging herself as she shifted her weight from foot to foot. "Hi."

I heard her unspoken question in the way her voice lilted over that one word, and my stomach rose up as my heart dipped. Rubbing my chest with one hand, the other glued to the doorknob, I couldn't work out my next move. Our gazes held as we stared at each other in silence. If she were any other girl, I would have hauled her against me and owned her mouth by now, but Clo was different.

"Fuck. Hi." Moving out of the doorway, I let her in.

Edging into the room, she kept close to the door, and I wondered if she planned on bolting. I closed the door and leaned against it. Birdie's voice came through the phone, and I almost dropped it. "Sorry?" I said to Birdie, my gaze never leaving Clo.

"I said, ‘is she there?’"

"Yes. I have to go." Hanging up, I dropped my phone on the chair and scratched the back of my neck.

Clo stared at me as she nibbled on her lip and shifted about. The silence stretched out. The clock ticking the only noise in this standoff. Her gaze dropped and her cheeks flushed as she dipped her head. I fought to keep the chuckle from rising up my throat when her gaze landed on my crotch. A minute max, and she'd be underneath me if that’s what I wanted. "Come sit, we need to talk."

Settling on the couch, I patted the leather beside me. She shuffled toward me and sat down, squeezing up against the arm of the sofa, keeping as much room between us as she could. Wringing her hands in her lap, she kept her gaze on the blank TV screen.

Several minutes of silence elapsed before I realized she would not be the one to begin this conversation, but I wasn't sure what to say. That I was fucking pissed at her for running from me was the first thing to pop into my head, but I'd known it was a possibility. My next thought was to kiss her and leave the words to later. Neither idea was good, not if I wanted to convince her to stay. "How's your week been?"

She chose that moment to speak too. "Orion, about the other night..."

"It's okay." I tried to lie to myself as well as her. "It was one night."

Gaping at me, she lowered her hand to my leg. "We did say one night, didn't we?"

What the hell? My cock stirred as I tensed underneath her hand. "You did."

"I've been thinking."

Trying not to move when her hand was so close to my now erect dick, I took shallow breaths. Straining my ears for the words that might change everything, I had to remind myself to inhale. "What have you been thinking?"

Twisting on the couch, she brought her knee up against my leg and ran her hand over the hard bulge in my pants. With slow, determined movements she caught each button on my fly and undid them. Gazing at me through half hooded eyes, her voice was husky. "Can we fuck?"

"Anything for you." My mouth watered at having her again, even if it was only once.

"No. I mean do you think we could be friends who... fuck... regularly?" Both knees on the couch, she kneeled beside me, her hair hanging in a curtain around her face while she took my cock in her palm. "Where are your boxers?"

Chuckling, I cupped the back of her head and pulled her in to devour her mouth. "Sometimes a dick’s got to breathe."

"Is that true?" The coolness of her fingers around my cock as she slid it up and down had me rigid, my hips rising in response to her hand. "Fucked if I know, but I like free balling. Now, about this regular fucking?"

"Mmmm." Her gaze was on my cock as she rubbed her thumb over the precum on the tip, making me exhale on a hiss.

"You want me, I'm yours, but you need to do something for me."

The tip of her tongue darted over her lip. "Anything you want."

I took her chin in my hand, bringing her gaze back to mine. This was the tipping point, and if she agreed, I knew without a doubt I'd win her over. My heart thumped and my stomach somersaulted, but I wouldn’t let her see how nervous I was. "I want you to give us a chance to be more than friends, or friends who have sex."

Yanking her hand from my cock, she recoiled, but I pushed forward, not giving her time to reject the idea. I'll be what you need, but I've waited so long to find out if you and I could be anything, that I need you to be willing to be open to the idea we could be more. That's all I'm asking for."

"You know I don't..." Frightened doe eyes widened as she curled into herself.

"Want a relationship." I sucked in a breath and pushed it out. "I know. I'm not asking for commitment, just a chance to be more. If it can't be, then we'll still be friends."

"All right," she whispered. For a second, I wondered if my ears only heard what I wanted them to.

She cleared her throat, and with a little more strength repeated herself. "All right."

My hands stilled in the process of doing up my pants, I turned to see the heat in her gaze. "That wasn't so hard was it?" Pinning her to the couch beneath me, I ran my hand from her hip to the curve of her breast and scuttled my mouth across hers.

Moving her hand between us and into my pants, she cupped the heaviness of my balls and danced her fingers over the length of my cock. "You're asking a lot, but then, so am I. And yes, it is very hard."

Harder now, from the way her nails scraped softly over my shaft, I darted my tongue into her mouth, tasting the sweetness of her mixed with minty freshness. "You came here for this, didn't you? No other thought in that pretty little head of yours but getting into my pants?"

"Maybe." A small smile played over her lips as she shoved at the waist of my pants. "I'm not doing a very good job."

"All you had to do was ask and I was ready to slide into you. I'd say you're doing a very good job." With a groan, I lifted her onto my lap, pressing her down on my erection. "Now bring those sweet lips here and kiss me, woman. It's been an entire week."

A small tremble ran through her, causing her to shift on my lap. The smell of her arousal tinged the air around us, making it hard to not rip away her clothes and sink inside her. Slowly, our gazes locked, she wound her arms around my neck and brought her mouth to mine. A simple whisper of her lips had me tightening beneath her, and when she darted her tongue into my mouth to stroke my own, I gripped her hips.