Compromised Hearts (4 page)

“Did we not just fight a war to put an end to slavery?”

“Won it, too. Not slavery, darling, but service. You accommodate me and I’ll accommodate you.”

“I cannot believe you would take advantage of my desperate situation.”

“Believe it. I’m not overly endowed with scruples when it comes to getting what I want.”

“How true. The milk of human kindness plainly started to curdle once I crossed the Ohio.”

“No doubt. Well, do we have a deal?” “No, sir.” She stepped back, away from his touch. “We do not. If I were inclined to play
the whore, I would have done it back in Boston.”

He shrugged and turned back to his horses. Cloud was not convinced that he had lost his gamble yet. There was time for her to rethink her refusal. Once she was sure that he really would leave her and the boy, she would change her mind.

Nonetheless, he began to plot a second course of action, in case he was wrong. Even he was not callous enough to leave her and the boy on their own. There was something about her that made him feel unusually protective.

Emily stood like a rock, her mind not functioning for a moment. The men she had known had not all been gentlemen, but she was sure none of them would have threatened to leave her and a small boy alone in a hostile wilderness. She could not believe the stranger really meant to do so.

“We going home now?” Thornton asked as he ambled up to her and took her hand in his.

Emily looked down at the child. His green eyes were filled with trust and hope. He believed her capable of keeping them alive, of knowing what to do and how to get them to safety. Unfortunately, his trust was misplaced.

She knew nothing of the country they walked through or the dangers it held. Emily knew the stranger was right—she was stumbling on with all the blind, stupid doggedness of her irascible mule.

She found herself asking if her chastity was all that precious. It might be worth protecting with her own life, but was it worth Thornton’s as well? The boy certainly could not understand the concept of honor or chastity.

“Sir?” she croaked, taking a hesitant step toward the horse and rider. “Sir?” she called in a stronger voice as she realized she had no choice but to accept his terms. “Mr. Ryder?”

He finally stopped, turning in his saddle to look at her. Although he had heard her the first time, he had ignored the faint cry. It could have been a false alarm. The way she stood there with her little chin raised told him she had made a decision. He only hoped it was the one he wanted.

She gently eased her hand free of Thornton’s clasp and approached him. She thought resignedly that she ought to be glad that he was young, strong and attractive. Her rescuer could have been a lot less appealing; he could have taken what he wanted by force.

“Perhaps if we could discuss the terms,” she began.

Dismounting, he pushed his hat back on his head and yanked her into his arms. He was amazed at how good she felt there. Cloud had held women that filled his arms better than this little Boston lady, but, oddly enough, he could not recall them now. All he could picture in his mind was how those soft curves looked without clothes.

“The terms are that we share a blanket from here to the valley.”

“I am not able to make any conditions?” she squeaked as he picked her up so that their faces were level. “You ask me to concede a great deal.”

“But you’ll gain a great deal—your life and the boy’s safety. I don’t think you’ll find it too hard to take.”

The kiss that followed confirmed his words. Emily had always been taught that a good woman did not enjoy such attentions, and under the present circumstances, she should be repulsed. But by the time he released her mouth, she could not deny her growing eagerness. It appalled her.

She could not help wondering if that earlier kiss had influenced her decision. A little voice whispered to her that while she was saving Thornton’s life and her own, she could be paying a price far higher than her chastity. She fought to quell a sudden panic. There really was no choice.

“There must be one condition,” she gasped, putting her hands on his chest and pushing against him.

Cloud found it hard to halt his lovemaking. He knew he was very close to tossing her down on the ground and taking her there and then. The strength of his desire for her surprised and somewhat alarmed him, but he had no intention of turning away from her.

“And what is that condition?” he asked
tautly as he fought to control his passion.

“Consideration for the child. He must be kept as unaware as possible.”

“You’ll be in my arms every night. That’ll be hard to hide from him.”

It was impossible to keep down the blush that stained her face, but she struggled to ignore it. “I understand that, but surely there is no need to be too blatant.”

“In other words, don’t carry on when the boy’s standing there staring at us.”

Seeing him looking over her shoulder she followed the direction of his gaze. Thornton was watching them with intense curiosity. “That says it quite nicely, Mr. Ryder.”

Carefully, and with a reluctance he could not hide, he set her on her feet before him. “I think I can manage that. So?” He brushed his knuckles over her cheek. “A deal?”

Swallowing her pride, she nodded. “A deal.”

She thought his smile was annoying. He had gotten what he wanted. There was no need to gloat. Shooting him a glare, she went to pack up her things.

Cloud returned to the small campsite. Whatever guilt he felt about using her desperate situation to suit his own needs was easily vanquished. He found that, in this case, he had very few scruples. He would get her any way he could.

“This horse is too fine for a pack animal anyhow,” he said as he removed his things from the animal’s back and stowed them in
the cart. “She’ll serve better as a mount for you. Of course, you’ll have to ride astride.” Emily bit her lip as she watched him prepare the horse for her. She had no fear of horses, but she had no experience riding. It was difficult to admit to him that she had never ridden a horse. However, she knew she had to speak up. She doubted she could pretend that she knew what she was doing and he ought to know her limitations. Emily simply wished that she did not have quite so many of them.

“Excuse me,” she ventured timidly as he stowed the last of his things in the cart. “Mmmmm?”

“Well, I think you had better look at me. It’s that sort of news.”

Frowning, he turned to face her. “You’d better put that hair up.”

“Pardon?” Her hand went to her still unbound hair. “Oh. Of course.”

“Indian sees that lot and he’ll be after you like a fox after a chicken.”

“I see, but I must inform you of something. It could be important.”

“Get on with it then.”

“I cannot ride a horse,” she said weakly.

“Not at all?”

“I’ve never been on the back of one in my whole life.”

“How the hell did you get around?”

“I walked or went by carriage.”

Muttering things she was glad she did not understand, he placed Thornton on his horse,
then grabbed her waist and tossed her onto the back of the other horse. “You’ll learn, honey.”

E
mily was sure there was a bruise to mark each new lesson in horsemanship. If Cloud was not cussing or yelling at her, he was laughing. Emily felt sure that she would have shot him if she’d possessed a gun.

The only good thing about riding was that it saved her feet, and the distance was certainly covered with more speed. Emily knew she would reach her destination much faster, but she was not sure she would get there alive. An immodest but judicious wrapping of her legs in her skirts had saved her from chafing but did little to cushion the jolts she suffered as she tried to learn the rhythm of her mount.

Cloud glanced at Emily and hid a grin. She
had no aptitude for riding. He doubted that she would gain much skill with time and practice either. Nevertheless, he knew she would do her utmost to keep up with him.

Fortunately, the little boy had a natural skill. Even more important, he was obedient, responding to Cloud’s commands immediately. Since it looked as if he would have the boy with him for the duration of the journey, that was a blessing.

“We’ll stop for the night soon,” he said, glancing at the sunset.

Emily could not fully repress her sigh of relief. She prayed that there were carriages in Lockridge. After this journey, she hoped never to have to ride a horse again, even if it meant she had to walk for miles.

Nevertheless, she listened closely a short while later when Cloud instructed her in the care of her mount. That much she could do without difficulty.

After the animals were seen to, Cloud urged her to take advantage of a nearby creek. She set off at once, feeling no qualms about leaving the preparation of the meal in his hands. As she took the short walk to the creek she mused a little bitterly that he could probably do that better than she as well.

Taking advantage of the thick growth of bushes near the water, she shed her clothes. The water was brisk but she didn’t mind. Simply washing away the sweat and dust eased her discomfort. The aches she suffered lost a great deal of their importance.

It was not until she donned her underthings, still damp from the rinsing she had given them, that she wondered if cleaning up had been a mistake. Smelling a little rank might have deterred Cloud Ryder. She grimaced as she shook that thought aside and finished dressing. The man was not about to be deterred by such a weak defense.

She knew it would be better not to think about what was to come. That however, was far easier said than done. She started back towards the camp and a fate she still faintly hoped could be avoided.

One look at Cloud’s face told her that she did not have even a faint hope. Resolutely, she gave most of her attention to Thornton. It did not bother her at all that Cloud knew that she was deliberately ignoring him.

She resisted the urge to keep Thornton awake. She would not use the boy as a pawn. She tucked him into his blanket shortly after the meal, then told him a short story.

“Is the man taking us home?” Thornton asked sleepily.

“Yes, dear. He’s also going to the San Luis Valley. He will take us to Harper.”

“You ain’t put your blanket next to me.”

“No.” She refused to blush. “I will sleep next to Mr. Ryder until we reach the valley. I won’t be far away. Go to sleep, love.”

She was glad of Thornton’s youth, for it saved her from awkward questions. However, she was not glad of the speed with which the boy fell asleep. Emily busied herself
with washing Thornton’s clothes and spreading them out to dry; then she cleared away the remains of the meal. She was just about to start on some mending when a strong arm caught her around the waist.

“I suppose this is an improvement over being dragged off by one’s hair,” she said tartly, hiding her nervousness as he carried her toward the bed of blankets.

“Wouldn’t treat that glorious hair so harshly.”

Emily gave a soft cry when he tossed her onto the blanket, but the ground was surprisingly soft. Peeking beneath the thin blanket, she found a layer of furs. When she looked back at Cloud, she forgot her caustic remark about a man and his comforts, for he had shed all but his trousers.

His chest was broad, smoothly muscular, and dark. The only hair she could see started as a thin line at his navel then disappeared beneath his belt. She blushed and hastily avoided his eyes. She gave a nervous start when he knelt by her and began to take down her hastily pinned-up hair.

Cloud felt her shiver as he smoothed his hands over her loosened hair. “I won’t hurt you, Emily.”

“There are many ways to hurt a person, Mr. Ryder,” she retorted softly. She trembled as he removed her bodice. “You think it will not pain me to play the whore for you?”

Tugging off her shoes and stockings, he studied her flushed face. “Not the whore,
Emily. My lover.”

“How so? Do I not buy your help and protection with my body?”

“Women have sold their bodies for far less.” He tipped up her chin and made her face him. “I haven’t even had you yet, honey, but I know you’re no whore. Now, no more talk.”

She had no choice but to obey him, for his mouth hungrily covered hers. Emily was so caught up in the maelstrom of sensation his kisses produced that she was only vaguely aware of his skillful removal of her clothes. The occasional half-conscious, muffled noises of protest she did make were ruthlessly ignored and soon she was naked in his arms.

Gently he pushed her back onto the furs. She lay stunned both by his kisses and her own embarrassment. No man had ever seen her so and the shock to her sense of modesty held her immobile beneath his dark gaze.

Cloud’s eyes never left her as he shed the last of his clothes. She was exquisite, lithe and slender but with all the softness a man could want. He did not think he had been so eager to bury himself in a woman since he had been a green youth.

Emily saw the last of his clothes tossed aside and gasped. She was sure she would be torn asunder. Although she had never seen a man fully naked she was certain there was a lot more of Cloud Ryder than there ought to be. With a little moan, she closed
her eyes.

Seeing her fear, Cloud paused. Although many women had exclaimed over his attributes, he did not really believe he was any more of a man than other males. This little widow and mother was acting like some virgin. He wondered if she and her husband had only indulged in restrained fumbling beneath the bedclothes.

When he took her into his arms, their flesh meeting for the first time, they both trembled. Cloud smiled as he brushed his lips over her face. The passion was there for him to tap. He only hoped he could control his overwhelming need long enough to bring it to the surface.

“Sweet, lovely Emily,” he murmured against her lips. “I swear I won’t hurt you.”

As he took her mouth in another drugging kiss, Emily felt rising heat burn away her fears. Shame flickered through her, for she knew she found enjoyment in his kiss, in the feel of his long, lean frame so close to her, and in the warmth of his touch.