Committed to You (16 page)

“Are you going to stay away from her?”

“No.”

“Excuse me.”

“I’m so sorry, but I can’t stay away from her. I will listen to you on all things but this.” My voice sounded low. “I know you may not believe me, but I love her.”

“Oh, I have no doubt that you do. You’ve had a crush on Evie since you two would sit on my porch telling jokes and feeding your dog Humphrey Bogart pieces of my pineapple upside down cake.”

I’d been in love with Evie far before then, but there was no need to correct Mrs. Elaine. She was already pissed enough.

“I need your help,” I whispered. All courage and dignity fled from my body. I was a lost man, one standing in the center of a dust storm in a deserted town where only shadows of myself lingered about. I was torn, ripped apart, and damaged beyond repair.

“So you were dating both of them?” she asked.

“Yes, but we were all in a relationship. I didn’t do the relationship to disrespect anyone, but that’s what happened.”

“Is Evie doing drugs?”

“What? No.”

“Does she think she is a lesbian?”

“No.”

“So she did that stupid relationship that she didn’t want to do for you?”

She did it for me. Fuck. She did it all for me. She sat in a relationship she didn’t want … for me.

I knew, but I didn’t. I understood, but never got half of what was going on. I’d been too busy relishing the fact that I had two women to myself and never truly thought about Evie’s decision. My heart imploded into itself. It burned and burst out with my chest. Shards of that black organ sank into my gut.

She did it all for me, not for herself, not to make us all happy as one unit. She did it all for me.

“Yes.” My bottom lip quivered. “Evie did it for me. I-I never saw it that way, but … yes.”

“How did you see it?”

“I thought we were a big happy group.”

She snorted. “Are
you
doing drugs?”

“No, ma’am.”

“So tell me what my daughter did again.”

“She did it for me.” I tasted that sentence on my tongue. Evie’s sacrifice was hard to swallow and difficult to conceive.
Could I have shared her with another man?
The very thought of another man in our bed made me grit my teeth. There was no way I could’ve shared Evie with anyone else, not even for a few seconds.

“Would you have done that for my daughter?” Mrs. Elaine asked right as I considered the question myself.

“No.”

“This is why there are several bullets on my coffee table with your name on them. I’ve been sitting here on my couch carving your name into each one. It’s kept me busy in these hours of missed calls and more news reels of my daughter’s shocked face.”

I gulped.

“It would’ve been one thing if Evie loved the girl and you. That would’ve made sense. I don’t think that’s what I want for her life, but I would respect my daughter’s decisions if she is truly happy with the outcome. But I saw her face. She wasn’t happy sitting there with you two, and she damn sure wasn’t excited to be kissed after you already kissed the other one. That’s why your name is on my bullets. I love you. Let’s make that clear. But love doesn’t mean I let you continue to drag my daughter down a path of destruction. There’s men out in this world that could pull a good woman down until she is nothing but dirt on the ground. Are you that type of man?”

“No. But, it wasn’t what you think. Cynthia doesn’t have … sex.” It was my last attempt at not being the complete villain. I probably should have saved it.

“So having sex with you was Evie’s job?” Mrs. Elaine asked.

Yeah. I should have left that alone.

“Not job but—”

“Why did you have to be in this crazy arrangement then? What the hell was going through your mind?”

“I don’t know.”

“Yes. You do. You know. Why did you drag my daughter into that sinful ordeal?”

“Because … ”

“Say it.”

“Because I could. Because they were both gorgeous, and they loved me, and I couldn’t believe I could have them both at the same time, and then one night I realized I could, and I went with it.” I exhaled. Water filled my eyes, but no tears spilled. “I just went with this crazy possibility of having my cake and eating it too.”

“And this is why your name is on these bullets. Do you love the other one?”

Do I?

I cared for Cynthia. We shared the same interests and hobbies. I enjoyed being around her like any other person. Love existed between us, but nowhere near the same heat or intensity of what I possessed for Evie. Just the thought of Evie’s name set my flesh on fire and triggered mounting pressure in my chest.

“Do you love this other girl, Jay?”

“No. Not like Evie.”

“Then why have this threesome thing?”

I sighed. “I was being selfish.”

“Yes. You were. There may be hope for you yet. Perhaps these bullets will be used for target practice one day.”

I wiped the sweat off of my forehead. “Evie won’t give me another chance.”

“You think you deserve one?”

“No, but I can’t leave her alone.”

“Need I remind you about my bullets?”

“I would take a few bullets to have her back.”

She laughed. “You may want to rethink that statement. I love you like a son, but my daughter is my life. You’ve done your damage now let her heal and then, if she wants you back, maybe you should see if you have my approval.”

“I can’t,” I muttered.

“She’s not for you anymore. You had your chance.” No hint of humor laced her words.

“I don’t care. I won’t just stand to the side.”

“No?”

“Never.”

“Then how are you going to prove to my daughter and me that you’re worthy of her love?”

“I … ”

“You had better figure it out and use your brain instead of that organ in your pants.”

My face flushed with embarrassment. “Yes, ma’am.”

“You lost my trust, Jay, and broke my heart as well as hers. You’ll need to sell us both.”

“I know.”

“Don’t go near my baby unless your heart is pure and you’re ready to love her like she deserves.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“This is my first and final warning. The next time you hurt me and mine you won’t see me coming. You know why?”

“Yes, ma’am. Bullets are so fast they would barely be a blur of movement.”

“Do me a favor this weekend. Go to church and pray. God is good to those who are considerate to others.”

Half naked men crowded the night club. And not just any group of men. Sexy gods. Lush muscled creatures emitting horniness into the air. It was weird, but my body came to life as these men wound their hips and grinded into each other.

Great. I’m not asexual or broken because I’m definitely turned on. I just want to have sex with homosexual men. Can I get more strange?

Hot guys surrounded me. They dangled from swings hanging from the ceiling. They threw silver confetti from the club’s second level balcony. Those sparkling pieces rained down on me and stuck to my skin. One hottie squeezed my behind as he strolled by, and a few tussled my hair with a few chuckles.

There was no denying that Tropic Cancer night club was where Pipe truly partied. When we first walked in, many people pointed his way. Many stopped and yapped with him as our group stood by. Others tried to drag him away, but one look at Evie’s face made them all edge away and make an excuse to go off.

My phone buzzed. I pulled it out of my pocket and checked the screen.

Uncle Kevin:
Please talk to me.

My hand shook as I held the phone.

Why? What did you have to say? What else was there to say?

Jay beat him up. Uncle Kevin had to know Evie knew what he did. There was nothing else to say after that. Mom hadn’t called. I wouldn’t have answered, but it would’ve made me feel better if she’d called or gave me some signal that she cared.

Music boomed around me. Pipe and Evie danced on the center floor like insane people. When we first came to Tropic Cancer night club, they’d disappeared into one of the many bathrooms and remained gone for close to an hour. It left Jay and me in this awkward one-worded conversation as we sat by the bar. When Evie and Jay returned, red tinted their eyes. Wicked grins spread across their faces, and neither one of them would stop moving for a few seconds.

Earlier, Pipe had on a well-fitted tux with that crazy hat, sneakers, and cane full of fish. Somewhere between the bathroom break and now, he’d slung off the jacket, undone the tie, unbuttoned his crisp white shirt, and had Jay holding his cane.

I watched them rock back and forth with the fast-paced beat. A new song came on. It looked like they didn’t even notice. I turned to Jay. “What did they do in the bathroom? Something more than marijuana?”

“No way. It was a joint or two.”

“I thought marijuana made people lazy.”

“Not Jay and Evie. When they’re in a club they smoke and then dance all night long.”

Placing his hat on Evie, Pipe took off his shirt and tied it around his head like a turban. Muscles decorated his arms and chest. I always forgot how built Pipe really was even though he tended to give off this odd androgynous vibe with his crazy fashions.

“He must work out a lot,” I said more to myself than Jay.

“He does. His weight lifting routine is crazier than mine.”

Sweat gave Pipe’s skin a shiny appearance. His muscles flexed as he yanked Evie from behind, pulled her into him, and rocked his hips into her ass. Jay stirred on my side. Evie hooted and pumped her fists in the air as Pipe continued to do naughty things to her body. His hands roamed every inch, every curve. It was insane. He squeezed her breasts and kissed both sides of her neck. He caressed her thighs and slipped his fingers along her flat stomach. The whole time she wound her hips to the rhythm as if the entire sensual display was no more than two people dancing.

I cleared my throat. “What’s going on with Pipe and Evie right now?”

“Don’t worry. You’re not confused. Pipe still loves men. It’s just something about Evie that makes him go crazy. They’ve been like this since the first time I introduced them.”

“When was that?” I yelled over the music.

“We were ten I think.”

Pipe twisted Evie around, lifted her up, and carried her to the other side of the dance floor. She straddled his waist and kissed him.
Oh my god.
It was an actual kiss, quick and barely any tongue, but still it shocked the crap out of me. My mouth dropped open. Jay gently pushed my chin up to close it.

“That kiss means they’ve both smoked too much.”

“Clearly,” I muttered.

“If you tell them that they kissed tonight, Pipe will deny it. Evie will laugh it off like it wasn’t anything.”

I looked at him. Fury edged his eyes, but other than that he appeared calm.

“So they kiss a lot?” I asked.

“No. Just when they’re high off their asses.” He gritted his teeth. “Evie was Pipe’s first kiss.”

“Excuse me?”

“Yeah.” He rolled his eyes. “When my parents died, I lived with my grandparents. Pipe and Evie hung out a lot more. They both would write me letters. One fall Pipe’s letters started to be weird. I mean for as long as I’ve known him he’s loved guys. I’m talking when we were six years old, he admitted that. He would spend hours talking about how cute superman was.”

I covered my mouth and giggled. “So what was different about the emails?”

“We were all fourteen that fall. I received an email where he tells me that he thinks he likes girls now. Next week he says he’s in love with Evie. Of course he didn’t know how I felt about her. He guessed, but I always denied.”

“Uh oh.”

“They were both there. At that age, distance seemed like impossibility to my mind. So I egged him on but every damn day I checked my inbox for another email. Meanwhile Evie is saying nothing about Pipe. She’s just updating me on her week like usual.”

“That’s so Evie. Oblivious and chilling,” I said.

“Then Pipe writes this ridiculous poem about her. It’s fucking insane because by now he’s started smoking a little. But he spent too much energy trying to discover worlds that rhymed with Evie. So you have lines like ‘you’re totally not heavy.’”

“Oh God.”

“Then he kisses her. I mean it’s insane. Suddenly my inbox is flooded with emails from both of them. Evie is freaking out. They’d been listening to Tupac on her bed.” He shook his head. “Pipe has a freaky fascination with Tupac. Anyway, they’re listening to him and Pipe decides that the violent and threatening hook of the rap song “Hail Mary” is the perfect moment for a first kiss.”

“What did Evie do?”

“You know.”

I grinned. “Punch him?”

“Yep. In all fairness that was kind of a natural reaction for her. I’d just taught her how to punch. So what happened was, Pipe took the punch, told her he was sorry, and kissed her again.” Jay frowned. “According to them both, there was no magic with the kiss, so they stopped and awkwardly said goodbye. The rest of the month, they avoided each other. I had to fix the craziness one email at a time.”

“Wow.”