Come Back To Me (11 page)

oeuvres: wired. Nerves and excitement and anticipation

fighting it out to see who’ll win, my stomach balling into

a tight knot.

I spot Riley first, then Jo. They’re making out on a

towel. I make a beeline for them, scanning the beach in all

directions for a flash of blonde hair.

‘Would you two get a room?’ I say, dropping to the

sand beside Riley.

Riley opens one eye and gives me a look that tells me

he’s going to get me back for this interruption later. I

wink at him. Jo pushes Riley off her and straightens her

bikini top.

‘Hey Kit,’ she says.

I lean over and kiss her on the cheek. ‘Hey Jo, how’s

things?’

She gives a little shrug as if to say
you know.
There’s

always a tinge of sadness behind Jo’s eyes as though

being in love with Riley brings just as much pain as it

does pleasure. I know it can’t be easy only getting a

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month with each other every nine months or so, and I

also know that she’s tried to break if off with Riley a

couple of times saying she can’t hack the long distance,

but each time she’s relented, much to Riley’s relief.

I watch her stroke a hand idly up Riley’s arm. He puts

his arm around her, pulls her close and kisses the top of

her head. I get a flashback to the night before when I did

the same to Jessa, and automatically turn my head to start

looking for her. She said last night that she’d be here, but

I don’t want to be obvious and ask Riley where she is.

Then I see the two empty towels lying beside Jo’s and

spot a bag with a copy of
The Hunger Games
poking out of

it. Jessa’s? Maybe. She’s a big reader.

‘So did you have fun last night?’ Jo asks.

‘Huh?’ I turn back to Jo, my heart leaping like a live

animal in my chest. How does she know about last night?

She gives me a cheeky smile. ‘You’ve only got four

weeks of leave. Three weeks and five days, to be precise.’

She glances at Riley and I see that flash of melancholy in

her eyes again and realize it’s not a flash at all, it’s perma-

nent, like a crack in a rock. Plastering on a smile she turns

back to me. ‘And knowing you, Kit, you’re not going to

waste any time. So what did you get up to last night? Any

gossip we should know about?’

‘Hey,’ I say, trying to deflect the question and wonder-

ing at the same time if maybe they know. Maybe they saw

Jessa and me at the stoplight after all. ‘What are you

implying?’

‘Last time you were back on leave you made the most

of it, that’s all,’ says Jo, tossing her dark hair over her

shoulder. I shoot a look in Riley’s direction but he’s still

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smirking. I’m just being paranoid, I tell myself. They can’t

know anything.

‘That’s not true,’ I say, grateful that Jessa isn’t around

to hear this conversation and keen to change the topic

before she turns up.

Riley smirks at me. ‘Bro, it is totally true. You had more

women than Hugh Heffner.’

‘I did not,’ I mumble.

Riley gives me a sceptical look in answer.

‘Just try not to break too many hearts this time around,’

Jo says with a pointed look in my direction.

I turn away and scan the waves, glad that I’m wearing

my mirrored shades. Jo’s referring to a friend of hers who

she set me up on a date with last time I was back. I took

her to dinner and we shared a goodnight kiss, but I never

called her to ask her on a second date because I just

wasn’t feeling it. Jo’s exaggerating to say I broke her

friend’s heart. To my knowledge I’ve never broken any

hearts. I’ve never dated anyone long enough for hearts

to get involved. And Riley’s way off the mark likening me

to Hugh Heffner. Last time I was back after nine months

without female company I had some fun, for sure, but

he’s making out it was dozens of women and it was more

like three. And then Jessa appeared on my radar, and for

the last two weeks of leave I didn’t so much as make eyes

at another girl. This is exactly why Riley can’t find out

about Jessa and me, though. He thinks I’m a total player.

And nothing I say will ever make him think differently.

My thoughts divert at that instant as though someone’s

flipped the switch and killed all the power to my brain.

The only thing that registers is the sight of Jessa walking

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towards me. She’s wearing the same yellow bikini she

was wearing the first time I properly noticed her curves.

My mouth drops open as though it’s on a loose hinge. My

memory didn’t do her justice.

A tidal wave could hit the beach and I don’t think I’d

be able to react. My focus is totally locked on Jessa as she

walks up the beach, lifting her arms to shake out her hair

which is plastered to her back. Water drips crystals down

her stomach and legs. She looks like a Bond girl. No.

Better than a Bond girl because there’s no effort to it, she

isn’t even aware of how hot she is. She hasn’t yet noticed

me, she’s too busy talking to her friend – what’s her name

again? Didi, that’s it – but then she turns her head, sees

me and freezes mid-step. A smile instantly lights up her

face.

I’m on my feet walking towards her before I remember

I’m supposed to be playing it cool in front of Riley, but

it’s too late to drop back down to the sand and act non-

chalant so I just stop and wait for her to get closer.

‘Hey,’ I say when Jessa draws near. Woah. I check

myself. I sound way too eager. I clear my throat and try

again. ‘How you doing?’

Eyes front, I tell myself, fighting the urge to let my gaze

wander south. In the background I see her friend Didi

grinning like a lunatic and poking Jessa in the ribs. So

subtle. I wonder how much Jessa told her about last

night. Judging by the size of the grin, everything.

‘What are you doing here?’ Jessa asks, barely disguis-

ing her happiness. ‘I thought you had a family lunch to

go to?’

I pull off my sunglasses. I can’t say the words in front

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of Riley but I hope she can read the answer in my eyes.

Because I wanted to see you.

She bites back a smile.

‘I skipped out before dessert,’ I whisper.

Riley clears his throat and Jessa glances nervously over

my shoulder. Her back immediately straightens. She

moves quickly past me and I turn around to see Riley

staring up at me with eyes narrowed to slits.

I put my sunglasses back on, feeling as transparent as

a pane of glass. Crap. There’s no way we’re going to get

away with this. The thing is I can’t stop staring at her.

Invisible strings are yanking on my eyeballs, forcing them

to turn in her direction. She’s bending over her bag rum-

maging for something − how the hell am I supposed to

tear my eyes away? Only a blind man could legitimately

claim not to have noticed her body. I almost feel like turn-

ing to Riley and just admitting I have the hots for his

sister. It might be easier than trying to pretend I’m blind.

‘Didi,’ Jessa says. ‘Can you put some sunscreen on my

back?’ She tosses the sunscreen into Didi’s lap.

Didi is sitting on her towel reapplying her lipstick. For

the first time I notice that Didi looks like she’s dressed

for a photo shoot rather than the beach, in contrast to

Jessa who isn’t wearing a scratch of make-up. I’m totally

digging the natural look. It suits Jessa just fine.

Didi glances at Jessa, then at me, and with a sly smile

she wipes her hands on her wet bikini top and then

buries them in the sand. She holds her palms up and

shrugs. ‘Can’t. Sorry. Sandy hands.’ She picks up the sun-

screen between thumb and forefinger and tosses it in my

direction. ‘Maybe Kit can help.’

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I catch the sunscreen and Didi gives me a
you can thank

me later
smile. I doubt Jessa will be thanking her later,

judging by the evil look she’s throwing Didi’s way. She

looks over at Riley, anxiety written across her face, but

luckily Riley is distracted by something that Jo is saying

and doesn’t seem to have heard.

I stare at the bottle of sunscreen in my hand then figure

what the hell, like I’m going to pass up this opportunity. I

walk over to Jessa. Our eyes catch and something passes

between us, a jolt of electricity that makes me feel alive

and buzzing despite the fact I haven’t slept in close to

thirty-six hours. I walk behind her and gently pull her

backwards a few steps so we’re out of Riley’s sight line.

Brushing her wet hair over one shoulder, I stroke the

nape of her neck. Jessa shivers, which only makes me

want to do it again. She takes her hair and twists it up

high, holding it on top of her head. She’s got a light tan

and a constellation of freckles on her shoulder that I want

to trace with my fingertips. I could happily stand here all

day just studying her, trying to imprint the sight of her

onto my memory. I know that when I’m back on deploy-

ment this image, this snapshot of Jessa holding her hair

up, sweat and salt water beading on her hairline, sun-

kissed skin glowing, is one I’m going to reach for often.

She looks at me over her shoulder with a quizzical

expression and I realize that I’m standing there like a

dork still holding the unopened sunscreen as she waits.

Crap. Get it together. I squeeze out a generous handful

and start applying, stroking my palms up her back and

across her shoulder blades, conscious that this is the first

time I’m actually touching her body, her bare skin.

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My fingers slide beneath the string of her bikini top

and her back stiffens. She shudders, she actually shud-

ders, drawing in a shallow breath, and I stroke my hands

softly down the sides of her arms, feeling the pinprick of

goosebumps that rises up in their wake.

I finish by running my hands down either side of her

waist and resting them on her hips, lingering there for a

moment, imagining pulling her back against me. God,

what I would give to be somewhere private with her right

now.

‘Anywhere else?’ I whisper in her ear.

She inhales loudly, turning her head to me, her eyelids

half-closed. My lips are inches from her ear. Making sure

Riley and Jo aren’t watching, I dip my head and drop a

kiss on her neck, just above her collarbone. She tastes of

salt and coconut sunscreen. I close my eyes and inhale

her, my fingers tightening on her hips, brushing her

stomach.

Her body tenses and she lets out a small moan – more

like a sigh – but then in the next instant she pulls out of

my grip and is gone. My eyes flash open. Jessa has

dropped down onto her towel and grabbed one of Didi’s

magazines and is rifling through it. Riley is frowning at

her. He looks up and catches my eye, still frowning, and I

wonder if he saw. No. He can’t have done. If he had I

wouldn’t be standing. He’d have knocked me to the sand

already and my jaw would be buzzing from his fist.

I walk over to him and sit down, my pulse hammering,

deciding it’s a wise idea to put as much distance between

me and Jessa as possible for the moment. I can still taste

her on my lips and I wonder if I should have gone for a

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swim to cool off. Instead I rip off my T-shirt and lie back,

resting on my elbows, acting as casual as is possible,

though my heart is thumping loud enough to drown out

the sound of the surf.

‘So,’ Jo says, sitting up and looking at Didi and Jessa.

‘One more week of school, huh?’

‘I know!’ exclaims Didi. ‘I can’t wait. The last eleven

years of my life have been torture. My last school was

godawful, but this one is worse. I’m so over physical edu-

cation, detention and wearing uniform. Five more days

and my life is finally going to begin.’

Jo gives a small half-smile and looks away and I watch

Riley squeeze her arm. Jo works as a waitress in the day

and goes to night school. She wanted to go to college and

get a degree but her mom has MS, no husband and no

health insurance. Being the eldest of three, Jo had to get a

job the day she left school. She’s the sole breadwinner for

her family. Riley sends her money from his paycheck each

month and would send her more, but she won’t accept

it. I don’t know how she does it. I never really wanted to