Clean Lines (Cedar Tree #4) (20 page)

"I'll send Drew by and alert the other boys. No worries. You tell that woman we'll find her boy yet."

With all local law enforcement notified and from all appearances on board, we sit back to contemplate our next move, when the door to Gus's office slams open and Naomi storms in. She stops right in front of me, all five foot and spit of her, hands on her hips and fire shooting from her eyes.

"Are you ever gonna stop keeping shit from me?"

T
hat jealous skank.

I'm fuming as I storm over to the guesthouse, contemplating all the ways I can take that bitch down. Anger has replaced most of the growing sense of despair and part of me is grateful for that. I'm angry at everyone right now; James, Jenna, the Phoenix PD and last but by no means least, Joe. My boy is out there somewhere in the fucking cold, and their combined shitty decisions and poor judgement have put him there.

I can hear the door opening and closing behind me, but I'm not interested to see if Joe is following me. Don't really care. I'm too worked up to face anyone right now. I barge into the guesthouse, not bothering to close the door. I know whoever is behind me will follow me in anyway. I head straight for the kitchen and open the fridge staring blankly at the shelves. What the fuck am I doing in here? It's not like I'm hungry, but the stressed and angry energy propelled me right to my biggest nemesis; the fridge. Back when I would lose myself in a cycle of depression and panic attacks, I would often self-medicate with food, which would lead to more verbal abuse from James, which in turn would bring on further depression. A vicious cycle I knew I was in and seemed incapable to bring to a halt. Until I walked away from my marriage. I've done too well the past four years, only to fall apart now. With a frustrated scream I slam the fridge door shut and swing around, only to find Emma standing behind me, regarding me with one eyebrow raised.

"Feel better now?" she asks me sharply, and I'm a little taken aback at her tone.

"Hardly," I mumble, a little embarrassed now at my tantrum. With a few words and one look she has me thinking about my behavior and—
oh shit
—my words, and as suddenly as it came up, the burst of angry energy deflates. Emma just looks at me as I slump down on a kitchen stool, putting my head to rest on my arms on the counter.

"You know you can't hold him responsible for that woman's behavior, right? I love you to bits, Naomi, and I only recently got to understand the full depth of your hurt, but I've seen a good friend try hard for years to try and make what was a fucked up situation right. You slammed the door in his face at every turn, girl. Nobody’s happier than I am to see you both finally getting your heads out of your asses to give what should've happened a long time ago a chance, but if you insist on dragging up past history that Joe no longer has any control over, I don't see it lasting long."

Ouch
. I flinch at the direct hit of her words. It fucking stings. Not that she's lying— no—everything she says is dead-on. I'm fighting not to dissolve into tears again. I've done so much crying recently, I'm sick of myself. Can't seem to hold back my natural instinct to defend myself just a little bit, though.

"My boss, Emma? Did he have to fuck my boss? A woman who hates me on the best of days? She took every opportunity to rub that fact that she was dating him in my face. I guess word must've gotten around that we'd had something years back because she was like a dog with a bone and the moment he dumped her ass and turned his attention back to me, I got the brunt of it."

God I even sound whiny to my own ears. Emma shakes her head slightly as looks at me with a mixture of reprimand and compassion.

"I'm sure he'll be the first to admit he fucked up, Naomi, and if my guess is right, he probably already has, one or two times. Let's clear something up too; he never 'dated' her, as much as she liked to spread around that she did. My guess is, she did that for your benefit alone, or perhaps she's just that delusional. Fact is, the only relationship that ever existed between them was in her head. And let's face it, that man's ego took a hefty beating at your hands. How long was he supposed to hold out waiting for you to let him in? I'm sure he made an easy target for the likes of Jenna at that point."

This is a good old-fashioned 'talking-to' and I can feel myself shrinking with every direct hit I take. Her voice softens as she continues, "You gotta at least own some of that, sweetie. And what about James? I know it's not easy being angry with a dead man, but Christ, if anyone deserves blame for whatever shit you guys are in, it would be him. Better yet, that douche he was defending... plenty of others to shoulder the blame, girl. All I’m sayin’ is, shouldn't be putting it all on the shoulders of the man who went so far as to risk his job to protect you."

Okay, now I'm crying again. I'm officially as emotionally unbalanced as a pre-teen on the rag who's about to meet Justin Bieber. Well. The thought of that snot-nose punk just shriveled up my emotions on the spot.

"I never asked him to," I snivel pathetically as Emma pulls me into a hug.

"I know that, honey, but it doesn't change the fact that he risked and lost for you."

My entire body seizes up.

"Lost? What do you mean 'risked and
lost
?’" I pin Emma with my glare and I dread the answer when I see her eyes doing everything to avoid mine.

"Shit," she mumbles, "Me and my big mouth."

"Never mind. I need answers, Emma. Please."

"I don't think he wanted you to know, honey. Probably didn't want to add to your worries," she pleads with me.

"Emma..."

"Fine. He was suspended indefinitely. They took his badge pending investigation or some such horseshit. Gus is working on it. Was actually sorting things out with the Phoenix Assistant Chief when those yoyos pulled up."

A sick feeling settles in my stomach and I inadvertently wrap my arms around my midsection.

"I don't get it. He's the sheriff! How does that happen?" I'm trying to make sense of this as the implications are slowly starting to sink in. "Oh my God, Emma. I was horrible to him, and all while, he just had to hand in his badge? Over me?"

With my hand over my mouth, I just make it to the bathroom where I throw up what little I had managed to get down earlier.  Emotional wreck, that's what I am. But while I'm berating myself over being so insensitive, I also become angry once again. This time for being left in the dark... again. Had I known, I wouldn't have made an ass of myself. He must've had a suspicion when he left this morning but never said a word.

I rinse my mouth and quickly wipe my face before moving in front of Emma who is standing in the doorway.

"You okay?" she asks, wiping a strand of hair off my cheek and tucking it behind my ear.

"I love you for giving it to me straight, but the truth is, I'm pissed again. I'm like a friggin' ping-pong ball. Don't try to keep up with me." I give her a kiss on the cheek and march past her out of the guesthouse.

"Never willingly tried to keep anything from you, Doc."

Joe sits up straighter in the chair he’s occupying across from Gus's desk. "What did I do this time?" I wince slightly at the bitter edge to his tone, but I can't blame him for that. Doesn't mean I should back down.

"Think maybe you could've given me a heads' up on the mess you had gotten yourself into on my account?" From the corner of my eye I see Gus sneaking out of the room, leaving just the two of us behind. Mighty gracious of him, seeing as it's his office. "Before you lost your job— hell, your career—over me? I asked you specifically not to put yourself on the line!"

"No," he says, as calmly as can be as he slowly erects himself from the chair to stand in front of me. "For exactly this reason. I did what I had to do... for me." He punctuates the last part by leaning in so his face is only inches from mine. "You are not taking this on. It's not your responsibility or your fault. Besides, I didn't lose my job, I got suspended indefinitely until they can sort out what those pricks in Phoenix are complaining about. Although I'm sure after today's fuck up by Phoenix' finest at your door, the suspension may not last that long. As it stands, I couldn't be happier to be able to focus my time on getting Fox back." He slips his hand around my neck and pulls me into him, and after a futile minute of resistance, I wrap my arms around his waist and press my cheek to his chest. I feel and hear the deep relieved sigh Joe expels.

"We okay now?" he rumbles into my hair.

"So sorry I threw that out at you. I was upset and made it sound like I blamed you for everything. You know that's not the case, right?" I lean back and look into his tired eyes and he tries to smile, tucking me back under his chin.

"Yeah, I know babe."

"I really am gonna quit though. Not going back there, I can't. I'd lay her out the first opportunity I got."

Joe doesn't say anything, but when I feel his chest shaking, I look up again to find him struggling to keep a straight face.

"What?"

"Lay her out?" Joe bursts out laughing, trying to stop me from punching him by wrapping me tightly in his arms. "God, you're something else. I love it when you get all fierce and feisty, and the thought of you getting into a bitch fight with Jenna Stanley... I've gotta admit, that's kind of hot."

"Please! That's like a fight between Barbie and Betty Boop," I complain hiding the smile that's threatening to appear.

"Exactly! Betty Boop is fucking hot."

"Joe. Your phone on?" Gus is in the doorway looking at me and I automatically release one of my arms from around Naomi and slide it in my pocket to check.

"Yup. Why?"

I'm not happy that Naomi is pulling out of my arms. I like having her there. But I can tell she senses something is up too as she turns around to face Gus with her arms now crossed.

"Neil picked up on some chatter over the police scanner. Units are being called in to that old auto shop on Alamosa, just north of town? Shots were fired. Sounds like some kinda hostage situation. The description of the hostage rang a bell with Neil." He cautiously looks over at Naomi, who is still standing with her arms crossed, but her lips are drawn in a tight line and her fists are clenched.  I inadvertently edge closer when Gus continues. "Neil thinks it might be Fox."

The burst of air that leaves her is audible and I go to reach for her, expecting her to fall apart, while trying to puzzle the information together in my head. But Naomi surprises me once again when she starts running out of the office. I'm barely able to catch her before she reaches the front door.

"Hold up, Doc. Don't go off half-cocked."

I'm having a hard time hanging on to her as she struggles to get free. Just then my phone rings.

Shifting Naomi to the side, I manage to position myself in front of the door and use one hand to answer.

"Morris."

"Sheriff, it's Carol. Couldn't call sooner. Those idiots are breathing down my neck, but I heard about your boy missing. Got a general call for assistance not too long ago. A hostage situation at the old mechanic shop at Alamosa and Lebanon. Shots already fired and it sounds like the kid may be in the thick of it. The descriptions of two that match the suspects in the Michael Vincent case and another of a kid with a cast on his arm. Drew is out there, but you might wanna head over and look out for him because those idiots from Phoenix are floating around too."

God I love Carol. As much as she has her nose up in everyone's business, she’s still loyal to a fault.

"Owe you, Carol."

"I'll add it to your tab, Sheriff," she deadpans before hanging up.

"What? What was that?" Naomi is hanging on to my shirt now and I cup her face in my hands.

"We are not running out there like idiots, Naomi. Just hold on."

I look up to find Gus tucking away his gun and nodding to the door. I had to turn in my service gun, but have a license to carry my own. It's in the glove compartment of my truck.

"I need you to stay here with Neil and Emma, Naomi," Gus says, "Joe and I will take care of this. If Fox is there, we'll bring him home."