Cipher (The Cipher Series) (13 page)

“Maybe I’m not supposed to be a Cipher. I think you guys got it wrong this time. For one, I’m not even sure if I believe in all that stuff anymore. I’ve doubted that everything happens for a reason for a while now.”

“For one year and two months. I know.” Gabriella’s voice softened. “I believe in you, and right now, I need you to believe—to know—that you are the right person to help Ashlyn.”

Summer stepped back far enough for Gabriella’s hand to drop from her shoulder. “You know, I’m getting a little sick of just
hoping
that you know what you’re doing. You’re wrong. I’m not supposed to do this.”

Gabriella’s lower lip quivered, tears filled her eyes, and when she spoke, her voice shook. “I didn’t get it wrong. You simply need to try harder. I wish I had the experience to tell you how to do that.” She sniffed. “I don’t know what to do with you.”

Great, along with feeling crappy and sad and angry, she got to feel guilty for making the bubbly Gabriella cry. Who knew that was even possible? “I’m sorry, Gabriella. I didn’t mean it to come out so harsh. I feel as lost as you do.”

“It’s been such a stressful week.” Gabriella fluttered her lids, the tears caught in her lashes winking in the light. “You know, I don’t always know why things are the way they are either. But I have faith things will work out in the end. I even have faith you’ll figure this out. I’m going to get you through this job, Summer, even if it’s the death of me.” A choked laugh came from her. “Pardon the expression. Obviously, that ship has sailed.”

“I’ll try harder this week, I promise,” Summer said. “I didn’t know I couldn’t tell people. I just felt the need to do something.”

“Well, you’re doing fairly well, considering everything.” Gabriella’s watch chimed and she sighed. “I’ve got to go deliver some more messages.”

Summer’s spirits sank even lower.
Great. More messages mean more people dying.

Gabriella took
Summer’s hand and sandwiched it between hers. “Keep trying, Summer Dear. You’ll get the hang of it.” She smiled, and then she was gone.

As
Summer stared at the now-empty spot, she wondered if she’d ever get used this new facet of her life. It didn’t seem all that odd to be talking to the Angel of Death anymore. The disappearing act still weirded her out a bit, though.

Too tired to think anymore,
Summer fell into bed and drifted to sleep.

The horrific images of death didn’t wait long to creep into her mind.

Chapter Thirteen

Anytime Summer closed her eyes or let her mind wander, the images from her nightmares crept back into her head and left her cold, inside and out. This morning while Dad had been watching the news, the weatherman had declared it seventy-five degrees and sunny, but Summer still decided to pull out her Chicago-weather sweater and wear it to school. Even with the sweater on, the chill wouldn’t leave her body. As she sat in her desk, starting at her notebook, she tried to shut out her bad dreams and focus on a way to help Ashlyn.

Troy tapped her on the shoulder. “Hey, what are you doing tomorrow night?”

“Tomorrow’s Friday?” She didn’t wait for his answer when she realized it was. “I’m going to Kendall’s birthday party. It’s supposed to be the best party ever,” she said without any of the enthusiasm her statement implied.

His features hardened. “So you’re back to
that
group now?”

Summer spun around. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Just that the allure of the in-crowd proves to be too much for some.”

“Kendall’s still my friend. She’s already annoyed that I’ve been hanging out with the Re—” It almost slipped out. The very thing she hated people to call her new friends. “The other group.”

Troy pressed his lips into a hard line. “So there it is. I’m a little disappointed, Sunshine. I thought you were better than that.”

“Oh, not all of us can be like
you
, Mister Bond. You get to hang out with any and every group, and it’s all good, because you’re so cool. Well, I’m trying my best here to balance everything and everyone.”

Troy shook his head. “Yeah, and I bet you’ll be trying all the way back to your ex-boyfriend. Don’t tell me you’re still hung up on him.”

“I’ve got more to worry about than what you think. Not that it’s any of your business anyway.”

“That’s not exactly a denial.”

Summer clenched her jaw. “I don’t owe you anything. I can do whatever I want, with whoever I want.”

“I was just hoping you’d choose differently this time. You think those people really care about you? They don’t even know the real you. I thought you were coming back, figuring it out. But I’m starting to wonder if you even remember anymore.” Troy green eyes bored into her. “The girl I met all those months ago disappeared. I only see a flicker now and then.”

Her chest constricted in a mixture of anger and hurt. “Whatever. This is who I am. I’m sorry you don’t like it, but you don’t have to be a jerk about it!” She whipped back to face the front of the room. Several people were looking in her and Troy’s direction, watching the show. She glared at them until they turned away. Add a few more to the list of the people who didn’t like her. What did she care anymore?

As Mr. Jennings lectured,
Summer furiously scribbled notes in her notebook, fuming as she thought about her and Troy’s argument. She didn’t know why he’d decided to act like a jackass today. Yesterday he claimed she could talk to him; today he was acting all self-righteous. At least it reassured her that she’d made the right decision to keep her secret to herself.

It’s my burden. I’ll deal with it alone.

***

Walking to practice,
Summer spotted Troy talking with a brunette girl. The girl leaned in, placed her hand on his arm, and laughed at whatever he was saying. Summer hurried by, trying her best to show she didn’t care.

Unable to help herself, though, she stole a glance over her shoulder. And found Troy looking back at her. Her heart clenched, and she nearly tripped. Tearing her gaze away, she picked up her pace.
Oh sure, he implies
I’m
shallow, then smooshes up against some girl who’s not exactly on the bottom of the social ladder. He’s always got a new girl hanging on him, too.
She clenched her fists, getting more and more irritated. No wonder she’d decided to give up on guys. They were all stupid.

Summer burst through the gym doors, liking the loud noise it made. Maybe she’d go in and out of it a dozen times and see if she felt better.

“It’s about time,” Kendall said. “We were almost to start without you.”

“Well, I’m here now.” Summer tossed her bag off to the side and walked onto the gym floor. All the girls glared at her as she moved to her place, making it clear they didn’t appreciate her tardiness. Or maybe they didn’t like anything about her. Right now, the feeling was mutual.

In a little over an hour, I’ll be done with my day. I can go home, drown my sorrows in rocky road ice cream, Oreos, and hot fudge, and pretend it never happened.

The music started, and
Summer kept missing her cue. Too much weighed on her mind, making her sloppy. Her moves followed one beat behind everyone else, and at one point, she wrecked into Lexi. “Sorry,” she mumbled. “I’ll get it next time.”

She took a deep breath and tried to focus on the music. Dancing usually took away her stress, the same way music did. The combination was supposed to be even better. If she could just clear her mind and throw herself into the routine, everything else would fall into place. That was the theory, anyway.

But today, it just wasn’t working.

***

“You need to re-evaluate your priorities,” Kendall said as she and Summer headed out to the parking lot. “I’ll even help you practice. You used to be so on, but lately…” She shook her head. “Don’t get me wrong, I realize some of it’s not your fault. I just don’t know how much longer I can defend you. Do you see what I’m saying?”

Summer looked at her supposed-to-be best friend. “Things are a little hectic and I’ve had a crappy day.”

“Maybe you should focus on dance instead of those other friends you insist on being around. You can be friends with them after season, when you have more time.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll do whatever I need to do to get the routine down.”

“Good. We can’t have people wrecking into each other while we perform.” Kendall readjusted her bag. “So, have you figured out what you’re going to wear tomorrow? My birthday party’s going to be so awesome.”

Summer caught site of the brown soda stripe on her car that she still hadn’t cleaned. She remembered Ashlyn hanging out the window, soda pouring, and the irritation churning through her body lessened. Her body felt lighter.
Almost normal.

Kendall crossed her arms and frowned. “What are you smiling at?”

“Sorry,” Summer said, pulling her attention back to Kendall. “I got a little sidetracked.”

“That seems to be happening a lot.”

Yeah, you’re telling me.
Since she could tell this conversation was about to go downhill, she decided to hurry up and get out of it. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Kendall. I’m sure you’re party’s going to be a blast.”

Summer climbed in her car and started home. As she buzzed down the familiar road, she turned up her music, letting Three Days Grace transport her to somewhere else for a while.
It’s going to be okay. I can figure it out for Ashlyn.

For Ashlyn…

Blue and red lights flashed behind her, and Summer automatically glanced at the speedometer. In her hurry to get home, she hadn’t been paying attention to how fast she was going. Groaning, she pulled her car to the side of the road.

Stupid cop, ruining her Three Days Grace bliss.

“Ugh, could this day get any worse!” she yelled at her dashboard. She grabbed her purse off her seat and dug through it for her driver’s license.

The police officer moseyed over to her car and motioned for her to roll down her window. When he leaned down and looked at her, he had a scowl on his face. “Turn down your music.”

Summer lowered her eyebrows. “That’s why you pulled me over? It’s not even that loud.”

“No,” the cop said, irritation filling his words. “Turn it down so you can hear me.”

Since she doubted saying she could hear him just fine would be helpful, she silenced her tunes. She handed him her driver’s license, not really knowing how this was supposed to go. Dad followed the law to the letter, so he never got pulled over. Already,
Summer could hear the lecture he was going to give her when he found out she’d been speeding.

The cop studied her license. “I also need to see your registration and proof of insurance.”

She turned to get her papers out of the glove box.

Gabriella materialized in her passenger seat, and
Summer threw her hand over her heart. “Holy crap you scared me! What are you doing here?”

“You were speeding,” the cop said.

Summer turned her attention back to the uniformed officer. “Oh, not…” She trailed off, not knowing how to finish without making things worse. She shot him a quick smile, then reached for glove box again.

“Be careful,” Gabriella said. “You better tell him what you’re doing so he doesn’t think you’re reaching for a weapon.”

“Why would I have a weapon?”

“What did you say?” The cop asked, tensing.

Summer’s pulse quickened as she saw his hand hovering over his gun. “I said registration. I’m trying to remember where my dad said my registration is. I think it’s in the glove box, so I’m going to get it.”

“Do you have a weapon in the car?”

“No. Well, I have some mace.”
And the woman who’s responsible for sending people to their deaths. Does that count?
“My dad makes me carry it, but don’t worry, I won’t use it on you.”

“I strongly suggest you don’t. You better keep your movements slow.”

Summer wanted to tell Gabriella to get out of here before she made things worse. Since she couldn’t talk to her without looking crazy, though, Summer reached past the Angel of Death and retrieved the necessary papers.

“Here you go.” Summer handed the information to the cop. She smiled up at him again, trying to soften him. It didn’t have the desired effect.

He gave her a stern look and then headed back to his car.

“I don’t think that went very well,” Gabriella said, shaking her head and then pursing her lips. “Getting grounded right now would be a detriment to your job. You can’t afford any time not working on Ashlyn.”

Summer frowned. “It’s not like I
meant
to get pulled over. And I think things would’ve gone much better if I wasn’t talking to an invisible person while he was here. I said
weapon
with an armed cop right outside my window. Is this how
I’m
going to die?”

“I can’t change the past,” Gabriella said. “We need to focus on the problem at hand.”

“So, you think my dad’s going to ground me?”

“That’s why I decided to pop in, even though I really don’t have time for it. So, instead of getting all dramatic and defensive with your dad—like you always do with me—explain your bad day. Tell him that you realize how dangerous speeding can be, and promise you’ll pay better attention to keep it from happening again.” Gabriella nodded to herself. She looked even more out of place in
Summer’s car than she did in her bedroom. “Yes, I think that’ll work.”

“You haven’t already seen the future conversation all played out?”

“Don’t be silly. I don’t see the future; I’m going off a hunch. My hunches are reliable, though.”

“I think this is the most helpful you’ve been.” Summer leaned back in her seat. “Of course, you might be wrong.”

“Oh, Summer Dear, you always know exactly what to say to make me feel like a failure at a job I’ve done for… Well, longer than I care to admit.”

“Sorry.” Summer’s gaze flicked to the rearview mirror, then back to Gabriella. “You seem kinda sensitive for someone who delivers death sentences on a daily basis.”

“Oh, you think when I was a little girl I dreamed of spending eternity doing this? That I was like, that’ll be such fun, delivering messages of imminent death and dragging souls away from their bodies? I assure you, I didn’t. But ordinarily I do a pretty good job of it. If you saw the big picture, you’d realize that death isn’t the end. I know my job is important, and it’s hard work. Just because I’m used to delivering tough news doesn’t mean my feelings never get hurt.”

“Again, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I appreciate the advice about my dad.”

“Just stay out of trouble. You can’t afford another complication.” Gabriella glanced out the rear window. “Your cop’s coming back with a ticket. It’s too late to talk him out of that one.” She was transparent when she added, “Now, get back to work on Ashlyn.”

The cop handed
Summer a ticket listing damages in the hundred-dollar range, then told her to be safe. Like he actually cared about her safety.

Summer eased back onto the road and started thinking about what she was going to say to Dad. Convincing him she’d had a bad day shouldn’t be much of a challenge. She had enough ammo on that subject to last for days.