Christmas Surprises (2 page)

Micah had been supportive.  The doctor's office where she'd spent most of her career before children had told her they would have a spot for her after the new year.  She'd been able to take the time at home that first semester of the girls' kindergarten year to take some refresher courses, to sit for her licensure exam again, and to prepare herself to leave home.

Now it was only a week away... and she was having some doubts.

She enjoyed being at home.  She liked having a meal ready for Micah when he got home from work, doing all the laundry while the girls were in school, having the time to comparison shop at the grocery store, and spending the afternoons reorganizing all that she'd never had a spare moment to organize in the toddler years.  It was work, but it was good work.  At the end of the day, she went to bed ready to do it all again the next day, content...

Well, almost content.  If only there wasn't that voice in the back of her mind, questioning it all.

It wasn't enough to just be a mom, was it?  To just stay at home, to be a room mother and PTA president for the next thirteen years, to make her life all about her husband and their children, to never earn a single cent, and to be defined only by being a wife and a mother.

It wasn't enough, was it?

She wasn't sure.  But now wasn't the time to stress out over it.  Well, technically it was way past time, since the decision had been made and she'd be back at work in a week, but she pushed that thought aside, focusing instead on Christmas.

Because this Christmas?  This Christmas was going to be the best Christmas ever.

Why?  Well, some of the family would be coming in for Christmas Eve, and for the first time ever, she and Micah would have a full house for the holiday, just like they always said they would back when they'd built the house. 

Joy and Taylor, who practically lived with them anyway in the suite at the end of the house built especially with them in mind, would be coming over.  They did fine at their own apartment near the center for adults with Down's Syndrome, working their jobs that were in walking distance and living near enough to the church Micah and Joy had grown up in for people to check in on them.  But Micah and Rachel had plans that one day they'd be living here if their health became a concern, if they needed help, or if they just wanted to be with family.  They spent at least a couple of nights a week here already and planned on spending the week of Christmas with their nieces, who would no doubt spend the majority of their time playing board games with them and insisting that they read yet another book together.

Also on the guest list were Grant and Maddie, the former of whom was going to be doing the cooking, of course, on his one day off for the holiday.  He had plans to have the restaurant open on Christmas Day, having figured that the profits from that one high traffic day would be enough to pay off the very last mortgage payment, which was, admittedly, a huge deal.  Maddie had told Rachel that he was so intent on doing it so that they could finally afford to buy a house in the new year, which was becoming a more and more urgent need as the days went by, counting down to April, when the baby was due.

They were also expecting Jacob and Gracie, home for good from Argentina, where he'd spent the last five years working.  He was coming back to take a job with a new company closer to home, practically in Micah and Rachel's backyard.  With their three children and a fourth one on the way, they would likely liven up the holiday festivities, but Rachel was glad for that, so eager to welcome them back to the US and help them transition into this new place, where Micah, ever the gracious cousin, had offered to help Jacob out however he could.

Natalie, Micah's mother, would also be there.  As far as mothers-in-law went, Natalie was the best, always the calm, quiet voice of reason and never one to be critical, at least not of her daughter-in-law, who she took special care around, especially with all that Rachel had on her plate with Micah's schedule, the kids, the new house, Joy and Taylor always here, and --

Her phone buzzed at her just as she was making her way to the fridge, thinking through the preparations she had to do before the guests began showing up.

Barbara Finn.

Ahh.  Speaking of critical.

"Hey, Mom," Rachel sighed, stopping her preparations for her guests and preparing herself in another way instead. 

Yeah, there were daughters who had issues with their mothers, but Rachel hadn't ever been one of them.  She and Barbara had always had a good relationship, had honestly been friends, and were once able to share freely with each other, in a way that had naturally progressed from openness when Rachel was a teenager to real camaraderie as she'd become an adult.

And then, she had children and left her career, and... things were different with her mother.

No fault of Barbara's.  That's just who she was.  A bra-burning, vocal, angry feminist who was now entering her senior years... and wouldn't dream of going braless (seriously, menopause does things to your body), was no longer angry about much of anything (and why would she be, given how great her life was), but still a feminist at heart, at her very core.  She'd applauded Rachel's decision to give her all to the twins because it was Rachel's decision, and wasn't feminism about being free to do whatever you wanted to do because you were a woman who
could
do whatever you wanted to?

Be a homemaker, baby.  Just do it because you
can
do it, Rachel.  Because women can have it all!  Be with your little ones while they're little and don't let the man or a raging feminist tell you that you should miss out on any of that!

Women empowered!  Empowered to give up their careers and be barefoot and pregnant and...

But, seriously, Rachel.  For the rest of your life?  A homemaker?  Enough is enough.  Once the girls are in school, enough is enough, surely, and you need to get back out there and be fabulous once again.

Barbara hadn't said that, of course, but Rachel had heard it in the relieved breath her mother had released when her daughter had announced that she was going back to work.

She also heard it in all the little, “innocuous” side comments Barbara made all the time.

Sigh.

"Hey," Barbara Finn answered back.  "Hope I'm not waking you up.  Stay at home moms get to sleep in, right?"

See?  Like that.

"If they do, I've really gotten the raw end of that deal, Mom," she said.  "I've been up getting things ready for hours.  There's no rest for the weary around here.  Especially not during the holidays."

"Get that husband of yours to help out a little more," Barbara chided.  "Women aren't made to carry the entire load of the housework by themselves.  You're in an equal partnership."

Well, she was in fine form this morning.

Yes, Barbara and Rachel were friends... the kind of friends who could offer unsolicited advice like this.  (One sided, though, as Rachel had never dared to suggest that her mother was wrong about some things.  Which she so totally was.)

"He carries the load, too, Mom," Rachel murmured, smiling to think of how Micah had gotten up before she had this morning to run a very special errand.  "He does a lot around here.  And he brings home the entire income, which is more than his load, quite honestly."

"He's not going to be the only one bringing home an income for much longer," Barbara answered.  "Can't wait to hear how it is back at the clinic for you."

Yes, her return to work was being lauded near and far by her parents.  It was good for a woman to have something outside of the home.  It was good for a woman to contribute to society in a meaningful way.

It was good for a woman to earn her "own" money, even if she was in an "equal partnership" with her husband.  (Barbara tended to talk out of both sides of her mouth about this, quite honestly.)

"One more week at home," Rachel said, not surprised that the mention of her diminishing time here made her just a little sad.  What would she miss out on?  Being the carpool mom, volunteering at the school, going to a ladies' Bible study on a weekday morning, having the afternoon free to meet up with some of the college girls from church and have coffee, invest herself in discipleship relationships because she had the time to do it all...

There was all of that, of course.

But Barbara didn't hear what her daughter didn't say. 

"And a busy week at that," she added, continuing on as Rachel thought about what was ahead.  "I want to help take some of the burden off of you and see if I can get the gifts earlier for you and get it all set up."

"I can handle it," Rachel said.  "Grant's got the food for tomorrow set up.  Said he'd try to get away to eat with us, but... well, we'll see.  But either way, he's having it delivered straight to your house."

"He needs to take a break," Barbara chided.

Get to work, Rachel.  Take a break, Grant. 

See?  Both sides of her mouth.

"That's what he's doing today," Rachel murmured, agreeing with her mother on the part about Grant needing to rest, at least.

"I tried to get in touch with him to see when he might come by, but I can't reach him.  Maddie either.  Do they ever answer their phones?"

Grant, no.  Maddie, yes.  But only now and again and only for sad, discouraged conversations where she never spoke ill of Grant or her marriage but exuded so much disappointment that Rachel could easily discern it.

No wonder at that, what with the schedule Grant kept.  Rachel doubted that he even got more than an hour with Maddie every day. 

Barbara didn't need to know this.  "She's working on the next book," she said, explaining it away.  "Spends most days at the library, working on that, so she probably keeps her phone silenced."

"I remember those days," Barbara sighed.  Yes, Barbara was published as well.  Her dissertation in women's studies had led to a book on feminism and its impact on traditional home values. 

Yeah.  She'd written the book on that.  Literally.

Rachel couldn't remember her mother's busy writing schedule or the promotion that followed because she'd been so young when it all happened.  But there had been plenty of talk about it all, was talk of it even now, all these years later, along with the still shocked murmurs from other women's studies experts who couldn't fathom why Barbara had
married,
then taken her husband's last name, and then -- gasp! -- had
children
, of all things.

Seriously, Barbara.  What were you thinking?

But even that had worked to her advantage later on.  Grant and Rachel were successful adults which made it to her credit all these years later.  Before Rachel had married and made the choice to stay at home, Barbara had regularly paraded her daughter around, telling people about her career, about how she was single, about how she was making her own way in the world and all.  (Yes, even as Rachel had been abysmally lonely, wishing for nothing more than a husband and a family.  She wouldn't dare say anything of the sort to Barbara, of course.) 

She had a good relationship with her mother.... kind of.

"I'm looking forward to seeing you," she said, thinking that her mother's concern was rooted in love and that no matter what she said or how it hurt, she did what she did because she honestly believed she was looking out for her children's best interest.

"Me, too, Rachel," Barbara answered.  "I was thinking --"

"Oh, hey, Mom," she said, looking at her phone.  "I have another call coming in."

"Take it," Barbara said.  "It could be work."

On Christmas Eve?  Before she even started working again?

"Probably," Rachel sighed, knowing that her mother needed to believe it, to think her daughter this important, to assure herself that this staying at home business was good and done.  "I'll see you tomorrow?"