Chapter Thirty-Nine
The day of the wedding arrived. The gathering was to be a small oneâfriends, family, the community near Em's estate, but not the
ton
. Lucy had been invited, and, though it would be painful, she told herself that she needed to attend. She needed to hear the vows and know that he was never going to be hers. When Walgrave had offered to escort her, she had accepted.
She wore a blue-violet day dress, borrowed from Colin's cousin Kate. Her money was not yet her own, her cousin having filed a petition in Chancery declaring that his missing cousin was incompetent. Few knew where she was, and those who did were sworn to silence. Marner's suit put her inheritance at risk, but Aidan, using his status as a duke, had begun to work on her behalf.
Everyone was already seated when she arrived, chatting quietly as they waited.
The church was crowded, but there was a seat in the back row of the church next to a solemn-looking man in a dark red suit. He looked at her with an odd recognition as she slipped into the seat next to him, and she dreaded thinking that he was one of those members of the
ton
she'd met while drugged on dawamesk.
“Lady Lucia Fairbourne? It is Lucia, am I correct?” he whispered. “We met once when your great-aunt was still alive, shortly after you returned from the Continent. She held a party for you, on the lawn, and invited the whole countryside.”
“Yes, I remember. But there were so many people there, I'm sorry that I don't recall your name.”
“My friends call me Adam.”
“And are we to be friends . . . Adam?” He was a handsome manâdark hair, green eyes, his voice cultured. In other circumstances, she would have found him attractive.
“We have much in common, Lady Fairbourne, much more than you imagine. For one,” he spoke low, leaning close to her shoulder without touching it, “both of us have come here to end an affair: you with the groom, and I with the bride. We must see them marry”âhis voice grew sadâ“must we not, to know that our time is over?”
He looked so sincere, and his words fit her motivations so closely that she did not object to his forwardness.
He leaned away from her, sitting upright in his seat. “But we should talk of something else. I was one of your great-aunt's protégés. My father held a living on one of her Irish estates, and she sponsored my education.”
“I would never have known from your accent.”
“My parents were English, but even so, any hint of my Irish childhood was a necessary loss. Ultimately, though, your aunt grew a bit disappointed in me.”
“Why, sir? My great-aunt was rarely disappointed in anyone, other than my cousin, that is.”
“Ah, yes, the grasping Archibald. I am pleased to see you escaped his plans. No, I think she hoped I would visit the estate and fall in love with you. But by then I'd already found someone I'd hoped to love.”
He looked to the front of the church, and they grew silent together.
A small boy, one of the baker's youngest, tapped Adam on the shoulder, and handed him an envelope. Adam looked at the hand on the envelope and turned white. He broke the seal with his finger and let the contents fall into his palm: a small charm shaped like a mermaid.
He looked surprised, then disbelieving. He carefully unfolded the note that accompanied the trinket, then he spoke quietly to the baker's boy. She watched as he handed the child a shilling, then rose and picked up his hat from the seat beside him.
“Lady Fairbourne, I must be going. I think perhaps my luck is changing.” He stepped into the aisle, then turned back to smile at her. “Perhaps yours will change as well.”
Some minutes after Adam left, the baker's boy carried a letter to the front of the church, where the Somervilles sat as a group. Aidan stood and took the letter. She watched as he read it, then, holding it open, strode to the back of the church.
He paused as he approached her, both surprisedâand not surprisedâto see her. “Lady Fairbourne, I would talk to you after . . .” His voice trailed off, and she was surprised at his indecision. It was unlike Aidan, except where his brother was concerned. “Would you please wait here until we can speak?”
“As you wish, Your Grace.” She owed him too great a debt to refuse.
* * *
Colin stood in the vestibule, talking to one of the Shelton spinsters and the minister. When he first entered, he had seen Lucy in the back row, but he'd forced himself not to look at her. He could not bear her tears. He knew his duty, and he always did it.
The wound in his side barely hurt him anymore, but he knew that till his dying day the puckered scar on his side would remind him of her touch. Even now, the thought of her hands ministering to him was enough to make his body tight with desire and regret. He forced himself to smile at something the minister said, having heard enough to know it was a joke of some kind. He tried to replace the images of Lucy, naked and kissing him, or Lucy, drawing a sword to challenge him, with those of Em, quiet Em. But his mind was unwilling.
Miss Shelton was saying something about Em, and he forced himself to listen. Even if the old woman was a shrew, Em deserved his attention.
“Of course, Miss Emmeline has always pleased us for being everything her father is not. Dependable, concerned with the well-being of her cottagers, trustworthy.”
“That's Emmeline for you,” he agreed heartily, “Always dependable.”
“Well, and of course, you know about her father . . . the absent lord, off in France raising a second family with his French mistress.”
“I believe that the proper term is wife.” Colin found it strange to be defending the man, but Em would wish him to do so, even if it meant he spread a little lie on her father's behalf.
“Well, in my day, a man didn't marry below his station without repercussions being felt through the whole estate.”
“Perhaps that's why her father has not come home. He knows what reception he'll receive. Perhaps it's kinder this way, allowing Em to run the estate.”
“He always was a flighty one, running off to the wars though he was the heir presumptive. But I suppose you will take over now. Certainly you and Lady Emmeline will wish to begin a family, and it wouldn't do to have the lady of the manor mucking about in the fields, as Lady Emmeline has often done.”
He thought of having children, but none of them looked like Em. Instead, they all had the shape of Lucy's face and her dark curling hair.
The minister saved him by escorting the shrew to her pew.
Colin brushed his hair back from his face and took a deep breath, as Aidan appeared at his side.
Aidan took his arm. “I need to speak with you in private.”
“Can it wait? The ceremony is about to begin. Em will be here in just a moment.”
But Aidan's grip on his arm was tight, too tight. Colin noticed the thin line of Aidan's mouth.
“What's wrong? Is Em unwell?” He allowed himself to be led to the vestry at the side.
Aidan shut the door behind him.
“A boy brought a note for you, but I thought whatever it was, it could wait. He insisted, so I opened it.”
Aidan held out a crumpled piece of paper. “I'm sorry, Colin.”
Colin saw the letter was written in Em's most formal hand, the one she reserved for declining invitations and writing letters of condolence. Colin took it, turning his back to read.
My oldest, my dearest friend,
I appear to be my father's daughter after all.
Please forgive me.
No signature. Colin dropped the letter to his side. “Two women running away from me. At least this time there was a note.” But his voice held no hint of humor.
“Lucy didn't run,” Aidan offered gently, putting his hand on Colin's shoulder. The two men stood silently for a moment.
“I need to find her, convince her to come back.” Colin's voice was quiet, almost a whisper.
“Is that what you wish?” Aidan turned Colin's body toward him by the shoulders. “Because if it is, I will call for my carriage, and we will search for Lady Hartley until we find her. She can't have gone far. But before I do that, consider the great gift Em has given you: the chance to marry Lucy. Can you tell me that your thoughts haven't turned to Lucy even once today? That you haven't wished that somehow, someway you could marry herâinstead of Em?”
Colin looked up into his brother's eyes. “I can't.”
“Then Em was the wiser of the two of you.”
* * *
Aidan, Duke of Forster, made the announcement, Colin and Sam standing at his side.
Since a feast had been prepared at the manor and all the neighbors and tenants were already invited, Sam encouraged everyone to join them at the manor house. A neighborhood dinner, he called it, instead of a marriage celebration.
Colin stood stoically at the front of the church, flanked by his brothers, waiting for the church to empty. A line formed of friends who wished to offer their condolence, and Colin, as any good soldier doing his duty, held his shoulders back and his head high. Her heart broke for him.
As the family waited for the line to wend its way past Colin, Walgrave took a seat beside her. Both waited in silence.
Colin never looked at her, and then, when the church was almost empty, he left through the vestry with his brothers.
“Forster has asked me to remain with you until he returns.” Walgrave offered her a piece of hard candy. The action, so incongruous with the situation, made her stare, then laugh. “See, hard candy has amazing properties. It can soothe an anxious stomach, improve the breath . . . and make a lady who faces an uncertain future laugh.”
She took the candy.
“I imagine you would prefer to return to London rather than attend the festivities . . . a decision that suits me as well. And, besides, Colin's guests are unlikely to remain here past tomorrow in any event. Ah, the great man approaches. I will wait for you in the carriage.” Walgrave shook Aidan's hand, then took his leave.
Aidan sat in the row before her so that he could face her. “I am sure that you are as surprised by today's events as the rest of the family. Unfortunately, despite the fact that Lady Hartley compared her behavior to that of her father, my brother believes himself somehow at fault, that somehow he conveyed to Em some reticence or reluctance to marry her, and that in doing so, he forced her to this course of action. It is, in his eyes, a breach of honor, duty, and friendship. I fear that he will respond by denying himself a marriage to the one woman he truly loves. As you will continue in residence at the ducal mansion until, at the least, we can determine that you are no longer in danger from your cousin's machinations, I have suggested that, when he returns to London, he withdraw his lodgings to his club. I hope he will come to the right decision, given time. But until he does, there is no good served by his distressing you.”
“May I ask a question that may seem impertinent, given all you have done and continue to do for me?
“Of course.” The corner of his mouth twitched momentarily into a sort of smile.
“Some months ago, you wanted nothing more than for me to reject his offer of marriage. Yet today you advise me to wait patiently for such an offer. Why? What changed your mind?”
“I have regretted that conversation many times in the last several months. But Colin is more himself when he is with you than he has been since he left for the wars. Even if I had not come to admire you, your courage, your resilience, these past weeks, I would still wish to do whatever I could to ensure that my brother remains that man.”
* * *
For the fourth day since their return to London, Colin remained away. Each morning, Lucy hoped to see him, and each evening she went to bed disappointed. She had hoped at least he would appear for the meeting Aidan had called to discuss how to assert her rights over the money and property she had inherited from her great-aunt. But Colin seemed to be holding to the plan he had outlined when he thought he would be marriedâAidan and Walgrave would help her, and he would stay away. It hurt to think that he could throw away the gift that Em had given him, but at the same time, Lucy had to consider that he had finally realizedâalbeit months after her original fortnight deadlineâthat he did not in fact want to be married to her.
“As I see it, we have two paths, perhaps three.” Walgrave folded his long frame into one of the chairs across from Aidan's desk. “Marner claims that in light of his cousin's lunacy, he should be given oversight of her inheritance and lands. As long as Lucy remains missing, there is no bar to his argument. A judge might well give Marner the rights to her properties on the argument that they cannot go unmanaged.”
“Can we insist that the court appoint a manager other than Marner, one to be paid out of the estate funds?” Aidan looked over the judgments Walgrave had brought with him.
“Not without revealing that we act on behalf of Lady Fairbourne. If we do that, any judge of good conscience will demand she appear for a competency hearing. Given that she appeared as incompetent for months in the
ton
, they will likely prevail. If we lose, we might well also have to return her to her family,” Walgrave said soberly.
“We can't have that.” Aidan marked a passage in one of the documents.
“But if we reveal that she is still in London, she becomes even more of a target.” Walgrave continued to outline the problems as he saw them. “As her heir, all Marner has to do is arrange for her to fall victim to some accident.”
“I'm not sure I like our options.” Sophia put her hand on Lucy's elbow.