Change of Heart 05 - Forging the Future

For Elizabeth and Lynn,

who have been there

since the beginning,

and for my wonderful fans,

who have made writing this series

such a joy.

Thank you.

Glossary

akhen-aten

King of the semels.

Aker

A leadership position in a large tribe that is fought for. The position reports to the maahes. Akers are always appointed in sets of twos, as manu and bakhu.

Amenta

A panther who lives in the territory of a tribe not their own without permission.

Apophi

A panther who is a disgrace and burden to the tribe.

Aset

(Throne) The appointed mate of a semel in the event of the death of their reah. An aset can only be chosen, made, by a reah.

Beset

Companion of a reah.

Djehu

A leadership position in a tribe that is elected.

Duat

A panther who has promised, on pain of death, to live only as human and never shift.

Epeboi

An initiate.

Hathen

A female servant who oversees the semel-aten’s harem.

heru-ur

A bacchanal orgy that takes place during the Feast of the Valley.

Ka

Life force.

Khatyu

The soldiers of a semel.

Khayan

Leader of the khatyu.

Khet

A term literally meaning “separated by fire,” each dead to the other.

Khonsu

A man standing second.

Krates

A person adopted as a brother or sister into a tribe, without having to swear fealty to the semel, a great honor.

maahen/s

Princess/prince of a tribe, the emissary of the semel.

Maat

Balance, harmony, correct action.

Mastaba

Mistress of a semel’s home, normally the widow of the previous semel.

Menat

Tribute.

Menthu

Guardian of the law.

Menthuel

Honor challenge.

Phocal

Leader of the Shu cats, an elite group of werepanthers that serve the priest of Chae Rophon.

Reah

True-mate of a semel.

Sekhem

The chosen mate of the semel-aten who is not a yareah.

Semel

Tribe leader.

semel-aten

Tribe leader of the werepanther capital city of Sobek, considered the leading semel of the world who makes werepanther law.

semel-bennu

Semel to be named.

semel-netjer

Tribe leader blessed with a true-mate who is a nekhene cat.

semel-re

Tribe leader blessed with a true-mate, a leader who has found his reah.

Sepat

Honor challenge.

Sheseran

Mate of a sheseru.

Sheseru

(Flail) Enforcer of the tribe, guardian of the mate of the semel.

Sylvan

(Crook) Teacher of the tribe, counselor to the semel.

Taurth

A yareah who has been cast aside because a semel found his true-mate.

Wosret

An unmated reah claimed by the semel-aten as a concubine.

Yareah

A mate of a semel who is chosen, not the semel’s true-mate.

Chapter 1

“S
MITH
?”

I lifted my head because my manager called everyone by their last names—easier to keep track—and since I didn’t know my real one and had adopted the generic, “Smith” was me until I got my memory back.

I said
until
all the time. The other word I used was
when
. It was beyond imagining that I would spend the rest of my life not knowing who I really was, so to remain positive,
if
had been stricken from my vocabulary. There had to be an end. But I couldn’t stop the questioning and the worrying.

“Where’s Keith?” Eliza Abernathy asked as she stepped around in front of me.

I gave her a huge grin, way over the top, but said nothing. She smiled back, couldn’t help it, and we’d figured out why weeks ago. She really liked me. I was a stray she’d taken in off the street, and seeing me get my footing, my confidence, pleased her. So as she stood there and I acted like a dork, Manager Eliza melted away, and there was only the warm, maternal woman left. And then, of course, she realized that I’d gotten her to switch gears, and after a moment of us standing there like idiots, she turned a glare on me.

“What’s with the face?”

“Really?” she prodded me.

“Pardon?” I asked innocently.

“This makes nine days straight.”

I cleared my throat, hitting her with another smile. “Do you want the long version or the short one?”

“Oh God, please, short. I can’t deal with long at this point.”

“Okay, so he’s stuck in Vegas, but he says for sure he’ll be here tomorrow.”

Her sigh was long and exasperated. “You know I’m about done with everyone taking advantage of me.”

“Oh, no, I would nev—”

“Not you,” she corrected, reaching out and taking hold of my bicep.

I ignored the pain. I’d found that anyone touching me at all, gentle bumps, a hand squeeze, a hug, or a pat on the back, all shot excruciating bolts of pain to my nervous system. If I was hit with a tray or a door, that was normal—or what I perceived as so—and caused only a moment of surprise. But hands on me, anyone at all doing that, forced me to steel myself against the wall of hurt I slammed into. But I allowed normal interactions like Eliza hugging me because I truly liked her, and the momentary discomfort was worth it to strengthen our bond.

She had continued talking. “I appreciate you working all the doubles and the extra days, and you must believe me when I tell you that it’s been no hardship for me having you here.”

I knew that, logically, but she’d taken a huge chance on a drifter she didn’t know from anywhere, and I wanted her to understand how much it meant to me. I lived with the constant fear that something was going to change and she’d throw me out on my ass with nothing. It woke me up in a cold sweat some nights.

“You’re the best bartender I have,” she said. “You’re charming and funny, the customers love you, the staff adores you, and you’re the only one Hector doesn’t want to skin.”

The head chef and I had a mutual appreciation. He liked that I remembered all the specials the first time, listened when he explained how they were prepared, and never, ever, asked any questions. He’d been pleasantly surprised by the number of people eating at the bar because I talked up his cuisine. I liked his food and told him often, and now he never sent me home at night without dinner. Without fail, the last thing he made was a meal for me to take home. It had started when I had nothing, but even now, when I had a little, he still thoughtfully cooked so I didn’t go hungry. He was a blessing, as was his boss, our boss, Eliza.

“Jim.”

Back from my wandering thoughts, I met her gaze.

“And I’m sorry I made you cut your hair, but there was no way around it with the new investors I was forced to take on.”

She still felt bad about me going from having hair that fell long and wavy almost to my ass to a style short in the back and on the sides, and longer on top. I was clean-cut, without the beard and mustache I’d been sporting when I arrived, and I looked a lot younger than I had when I’d walked in, hoping to wash dishes or bus tables. Of course I had no idea how old I was, but late twenties seemed a pretty safe bet. “You know I don’t give a crap about my hair.”

“It was so pretty, but just not our aesthetic here.”

I shrugged. “I’d rather be part of your family than have a ponytail.”

That made her sigh. “You know I’d make you an assistant manager, but you make more with tips behind the bar.”

I was overwhelmed, as I was on a daily basis. She had so much faith in me after only three months, and though I didn’t understand why she did, I was touched.

“I know you don’t have your memory back, but honey, you took to this job like a duck to water. I’ll bet you you’ve done this kind of work before.”

Perhaps.

“But seriously, I need you to start taking your days off so you don’t get burned out. Do you understand?”

“Yes, ma’am,” I agreed, patting her hand still on my upper arm. “So what do we think? Can I get some drinks made for my customers, or should we bond more?”

She chuckled before tugging me close and holding me tight.

I hugged her back, even though it hurt, and then when we parted, she was smiling for a moment before she suddenly jolted.

“Eliza?” I asked, concerned.

“Oh dear Lord,” she said quickly, “I almost forgot why I came back here in the first place. Our semel, Alaine Boucher, is having dinner with his mate and his entourage, and he said he’d love to finally meet you. I already explained to him that you’re under my protection, and I vouched for you, so it’s really just a formality. But you know how much semels like their posturing and tradition.”

But I didn’t.

“They love to bore everyone to tears.”

I nodded, nervous, felt my hands shaking as my stomach twisted into a knot.

“You don’t have to worry. I explained that your memory has been affected by whatever you’ve been through and that you can’t speak your lineage to him.”