Authors: JS Taylor
Copyright © 2014 JS Taylor.
All rights reserved.
35 Cambridge Road, Hove
First Edition February 2014
The characters in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.
Printed in the United Kingdom
I wake up to find myself wrapped in Adam.
He’s warm and solid. I snuggle deeper into him, feeling his steady heartbeat. Adam’s breath ripples gently across the back of my neck. His muscular arms are wrapped over mine. I am cocooned in his strong body. My eyes slide over his tattoos.
Every one a story.
My eyes follow the coy carp on his back, swimming upstream, to show he hasn’t overcome his obstacles yet.
But he’s working on them.
Then my gaze drifts to his arms
– a spiralling Celtic band, and the ragged Republic of Ireland flag.
Adam’s words float back to me as I consider the faded colours.
I don’t regret my past. It’s made me who I am. But now I choose my battles.
My mind has drifted to Dez, my ex
-boyfriend. He brought enough conflict to last me a lifetime. It’s a relief to know Adam has moved on from his troubled background.
In fact, Adam is so completely different to Dez, it feels like all that was a lifetime ago. I trust Adam, I realise, in a way I never trusted Dez. That’s worth a lot.
As if hearing my thoughts, I feel Adam stir, and his lips plant a kiss on my neck.
“Hello gorgeous.” His deep voice resonates in my ear, and his arms encircle me tighter. “You’re a nice thing to wake up to.”
“I was just thinking the same thing,” I admit.
“You were?” he sounds pleased. Then he turns me slightly.
“We’re a good fit aren’t we? I can’t remember the last time I slept so well.”
I smile. “I guess we are.”
It’s true. Our bodies do seem to mould together perfectly.
Adam yawns. “I love being all cuddled up with you,” he says sleepily. His hand shifts to stroke along my arm. “It’s fast becoming my favourite thing.”
“A man who prefers cuddling to sex?” I tease, shifting to see his face.
If last night was anything to go by, sex
is high on his list of favourites.
Adam’s dark eyebrows shoot up.
“Is that an invitation?”
“No. I mean. I was just…”
His hands are already roaming my body.
like an invitation.” His voice has dropped dangerously low.
“Again?” I say. But his words are already having an effect on my body, and my words come thickened with lust. How does he do that?
My reaction isn’t lost on Adam. A wicked smile is playing on his lips.
“How about I pick you up out of bed, and carry you into the shower?” he suggests. “Give you some time to think about it.”
“That doesn’t sound like much time,” I protest weakly.
But Adam is shifting the sheets, and lifting me out.
“Let me use the shower on you,” he whispers on my ear, as he stands with me in his arms. “I want to watch your face as I make you come.”
I feel a spark of desire race through me.
Use the shower on me?
“I’ve never done that before,” I admit, slightly hazy with desire now.
“Not even by yourself?” Adam asks.
I shake my head shyly.
Adam is grinning, holding me in his arms. He shifts his weight and carries me towards the en-suite.
“Good,” he says, stepping into the shower room. “I plan to be your first for a lot of things.”
He leaves this suggestion hanging. As though he’s planning on pushing some boundaries.
What exactly does he mean
Right now, all I can think about is how much I want him.
Adam drops me gently to my feet outside the shower, and kisses my mouth.
I hear him turn on the water, but it hardly registers. I’m mesmerised by his kiss.
“Get in,” he orders.
I hesitate fractionally.
“Are you always this bossy?” I protest.
“You know I am. Now get in the shower before I spank your ass.”
For some reason this idea doesn’t sound too bad. But I hop quickly into the shower before he can fulfil his threat.
The warm water cascades over me, and I tip my head back to let it run down my face.
Then Adam steps in the shower, and his hands caress the front of my body.
His thumbs join between my breasts, and then spread outwards over my nipples.
I keep my eyes closed, letting the sensation of the water and his touch combine.
“That feels good,” I whisper.
Adam’s lips kiss mine gently.
“Open your legs,” he whispers.
His hand gently parts my legs. And then the water stops cascading over my head, and starts again over my stomach.
I open my eyes to see Adam’s dark gaze is locked on my face. He’s holding the shower head lower down, directing it towards my body.
I’m no longer unsure as to how he plans to use the shower.
The anticipation is both heavenly and torturous. Spikes of warm water ricochet off my bare stomach, and then travel slowly down, inch by inch.
I gasp as the water patters gently at the meeting of my thighs.
He’s teasing me. Keeping the pressure light. But every few seconds, he moves the water tantalisingly closer.
“Keep your eyes open,” he commands. “I want to see everything.”
I’m about to protest. His blue eyes are so intent I’m disconcerted.
Then the showerhead dips right down, and I groan.
The water is directed upwards now. Right between my legs.
“Aaahhhh…” My eyes feel heavy. The flash of sensation is so strong. It’s like a hundred warm darts, mercilessly working over me.
“Keep your eyes open,” Adam commands. “Or I’ll stop.”
I blink into his blue eyes. It feels so intense, making eye contact like this. When he’s doing… That.
But I don’t want him to stop.
I feel my lips part slightly, as the shower water massages me. He switches the pressure. Light, then hard.
My knees convulse.
“I don’t know if I can stay standing,” I gasp, my eyes still on his.
Adam’s blue eyes flicker slightly.
“I won’t let you fall,” he whispers. His expression is hungry now, drinking in my face. “Just don’t take your eyes off me.”
He lifts his head back very slightly, considering me like a connoisseur appreciating a fine painting. And then I feel then warm water intensify.
“Adam!” I hardly know what I’m saying.
His hand locks around my neck, and his fingers wind into my hair.
“Look at me.”
Somehow I manage to make my face obey. Though my body is spiralling into a close hot world where nothing else matters.
“Does it feel good?” he demands. There’s a ghost of a smile on his face.
“You know it does!” I gasp. He can see every burst of pleasure written large on my features.
“You look so beautiful,” he murmurs. “I think if I just move my hand a fraction…”
The showerhead changes angle, and I breathe in sharply. And then I’m coming. Hard.
Everything except Adam’s blue eyes fade. I’m plunged into a blissful pool of light. I’m floating away, and Adam’s face is the only thing anchoring me to reality.
“Mmmmm.” Murmurs Adam approvingly. He flicks the showerhead quickly, drawing the moment out, maximising my orgasm.
My eyelids flutter, and my head moves to tip back. But Adam’s fingers curled in my hair pull it sharply straight.
“Look at me,” he commands.
With my eyes on his, the sensation is so much deeper. I feel as though I’m falling into him. As though Adam is my entire world.
It’s such a powerful emotion that I want to look away. But my head is tightly secured. And a deeper part of my soul loves this. This utter abandon.
“That’s what I wanted,” whispers Adam, his eyes roving my face. “I wanted to see you just like this. Completely open to me. Completely mine.”
There’s something fiercely protective in his face, and my lips part as I look at him.
I hardly know what to say, except for in this moment, I feel the same. I am completely his.
Adam reaches for a condom, then moves to stand between my legs, his erection forcefully between my thighs.
Instinctively, I move a leg to wrap around his waist, pulling him into me, steadying myself on his strong body.
Adam groans as he slides into me. I rake my hands over his back, taking in the full length of him.
“That’s so good Summer,” he whispers, moving into me.
He’s still holding the showerhead, and he moves it to spray over my clitoris, as he thrusts deeper into me.
Oh my God.
I’m going to come again.
Adam’s arms pull me tight against him, pushing himself deep into me. It’s so good I cry out. And he begins moving steadily, building a relentless pace.
“Don’t stop,” I hear myself say, as his mouth kisses across my face and neck.
His mouth finds mine seeking out my tongue.
The kiss builds me with absolute certainly to my second orgasm. I feel heat wash over me, as our mouths collide, mirroring our bodies.
As Adam moves faster, I erupt for a second time, gasping into his mouth.
“I can feel you,” he whispers. “Oh God Summer. You feel so good…”
Then I feel him too.
I pull him close, as he peaks, plunging himself deep, and groaning aloud.
We stand for a moment, entwined, our sweat mingling with the shower water.
Adam is breathing hard. Then he reaches up, and slowly turns off the spraying water.
“I loved that,” he gasps. “I loved watching your face. And being inside you. Feeling your orgasm.”
I lower my eyes a little, not sure of how to reply.
“You looked so beautiful,” he says. “Your vulnerability… It’s enchanting.”
“I liked it,” I admit. “Looking at you. It was… intense. Emotionally as well as physically.”
Adam nods. He turns the shower on again.
“Good. Now let’s get you showered off. So we can do it all over again.”
Adam and I are wrapped in clean towels, cuddled up on the bed. After two rounds of mind-blowing sex, reality is beginning to make an unwelcome intrusion.
I feel as though I’ve been living in a dream world for the past few days. Now it’s time to face the music.
Last night was the big party. My band, She’s All That unexpectedly got through to the next round of Sing-Win, a massive new talent show.
Now we’re in the show proper, we’re under less pressure in some ways. And much more in others.
In the thrill of getting through, I let myself get swept along with the whirlwind of Adam Morgan. After the party, he carried me back to his apartment, and I hardly gave it a thought. And whilst I’d like to blame the many glasses of celebratory champagne, I know the truth. This man has intoxicated me. My body craves him. I need his touch so badly it’s begun to frighten me.
Now practical matters are occurring to me. That this can’t carry on. Not with the show. It just can’t work. There’s no way we can hide things forever. And we’ve already taken too many risks.
“I have an interview,” I say, beginning to make my gentle reasons for leaving. “With George and Tammy. I have to be back at the house. And camera ready.”
“I know your schedule,” growls Adam. He sounds annoyed. Then his face softens. “So I’ve only got you for another hour?”
“Maybe a half-hour,” I say. “Otherwise it’s risky sneaking back.”
Adam lets out a deep sigh.
“Summer,” he says. “I don’t know what you’ve done to me. But you’ve given me a big problem.”
I smile uncertainly, trying to make light of his words.
“I thought we took care of your big problem twice already?” I joke.
“Be careful,” he says. “Or I’ll make you take care of it again.”
My traitorous body gives a little shiver at the thought. I mentally slap it down again.
This is important Summer. You can’t make decisions from between your legs any more.
Adam’s expression becomes serious again.
“When I was a lad,” he says, “I had to take a lot of responsibility, very young.
And with everything
that went on, I learned to take each day as it came.”
Where’s he going with this?
Adam spreads his hands out.
“It comes from growing up where I did,” he adds. “All us boys. We were raised as cannon fodder. No plans. No future. You never knew what would happen tomorrow.”
I feel myself holding my breath. Adam has touched on his past before. And I know he grew up in a violent part of Ireland. But this sounds worse that I imagined.
“Becoming a singer was the only thing I ever really planned,” continues Adam. “After that. I dunno. I just waited to see where life took me.”
His blue eyes are on mine now. The sincerity in them is heart breaking.
Adam breathes out a deep sigh.
“Then you came along.”
This sounds serious.
He pauses for a moment, whilst I’m taking what he means by this.
“I don’t feel the same as I did,” he says finally.
I wait to be sure he’s finished speaking.
“What do you mean?” I say finally.
My heart is fluttering in my chest. I never considered Adam would be talking this way.
I realise in a flash, that part of me has always been removed from this. Part of me has always been ready for it to end.
True, Adam has never given me any reason to think he’s not serious. But he is, after all, a famous singer. He’s got a reputation for bedding women. And I’ve no reason to think I should buck the trend.
Adam cups my face in his hands.
“You changed things,” he says simply. “I don’t want to live moment by moment anymore. I can’t. If we’re to stand a chance, I need to think in months, not hours.”
I stare into his eyes, trying to read him.
Does he say this to every woman?
I refuse to believe it. The sincerity in his face is compelling.
He sighs again.
“I want us to have a serious relationship,” he continues, “so I now have to do something I’ve never done before.”
I’m reeling, taking all this in. So far we’ve gotten close. Very close. But we haven’t talked about getting serious.
“You want us to have a serious relationship?” I repeat softly, hardly daring to believe he means it. “Are you sure?”
I spark of amusement flashes in his eyes.
“Of course I do,” he says. “Didn’t you figure that out yet?”
His hands move gently to my neck. He lifts the delicate silver necklace he gave me before the last show. The rectangular pendant of Saint Cecilia, which Adam said would protect me.
“Why do you think I gave you this?” he breathes gently, making the hairs on my neck stand on end. “It’s not just about giving you a bit of extra luck on stage Summer. You don’t need luck.”
He lets the pendant fall back down, and looks deep into my eyes.
“The necklace is a sign that you’re mine,” he says softly. “So long as you wear it, I’ll know you care for me.”
My hands reflexively close around the necklace. I have always clutched it to remind me of Adam, of course. But it didn’t occur to
me that he meant it as anything more than a lucky gift.
Now he’s told me it has another meaning, I love the necklace even more. I hold it tight in my fist.
I love you.
The thought sounds in my head before I can stop it. And the force of my feeling frightens me. After what happened with Dez, I wasn’t planning on another relationship for a long time.
Get a hold of yourself Summer. You can’t fall in love this quickly. This is lust.
Adam is looking at me carefully, as though reading my thoughts.
“I know something happened to you, to make you scared of commitment,” he says, spearing me with the insight.
How does he know that?
“But I also know, that there’s something happening between us,” he continues. “Something you can’t deny.”
I stare back at him, wanting to speak. But I can’t.
“I have to plan things,” says Adam. “For you. For us. Because the last thing I ever want to do, is put you in a situation where you’re vulnerable. So that risk-taker Adam Morgan. He’s got to go.”
He doesn’t explain what he means by making me vulnerable. But I think I can take a guess. Press. Public opinion. Things could go badly for me, if it comes out I’m sleeping with Adam.
“I don’t want you to change,” I say.
It’s true. I like him how he is. With his motorbike and his cigarettes, and his wild ways. He’s super sexy and I wouldn’t change a bit of him.
“That’s because you don’t know how I used to be,” says Adam. “Usually, with women… Well. It’s not like this.”
He shakes his head, as if he’s struggling to comprehend it all.
“I always thought, I’d meet the right girl and then I’d force myself to give up my wandering ways.” He gives me a little smile.
“But with you,” he continues, “I don’t feel as though
I have to give anything up. You’re a pleasure, not a sacrifice. You deserve the best from me, Summer.”
It’s a lot to take in. This all feels so fast.
My heart is exploding like a sunburst. But my head keeps telling me this could end badly.
“Adam I…” Unexpectedly, my eyes fill with tears, and there’s a lump in my throat.
“I know,” says Adam stroking my cheek. “You’re not used to this. I’m not either. Just say you feel the same about me Summer. Say you want us to have a relationship together.”
A million thoughts explode in my head. But in the end there’s just one emotion left.
I really am falling in love this man
, I realise. It’s as simple, and complicated as that.
“I do,” I whisper. “I do want us to be together.”
Tears are running down my face now, and I’m not even sure where they’ve come from.
Part of me feels as if I’m falling into a deep black hole. My whole life I’ve always had a back-up plan. This is uncharted territory. I’m moving into a place where there is no plan B. No sensible way out.
And it occurs to me, I’d be dragging Adam into a very difficult situation.
“Adam,” I sigh, thinking of the momentousness of what he’s suggesting. “It will be so hard. I’m on the show now. And you…”
“I’ll own the show,” he finishes, “In just over a week.”
“Even if you own the show,” I point out, “it will still be problematic.” I frown, hating the idea of causing him stress.
“Wouldn’t you just rather find a celebrity girlfriend?” I say exasperatedly. “You wouldn’t need to sneak around. It would be so much easier for you.”
To my surprise, Adam bursts out laughing.
“It would be easier,” I repeat, frowning.
He tilts his head, gazing at me adoringly.
What did I say to deserve that look?
“And what if I don’t want easy?” he grins. “What if I want difficult…” he kisses my forehead, “stubborn…” his lips meet my nose, “fascinating Summer Evans?”
His lips are on my mouth now, and I melt into his kiss, unable to resist.
“I suppose if that’s what you want,” I murmur, breathing into him, “There’s no help for you.”