Burnt (9 page)

Rebecca glanced at the clock above the sink and was surprised to see it was almost noon. Her morning in the garden had been well spent; the pretty gardens, planted by someone who obviously enjoyed gardening, were slowly coming back to their original splendour and she couldn't wait to sit out there and enjoy them – weed free and uncluttered.

The buzz from her handbag on the kitchen bench made her jump. She dug through the contents of the bag, past the girls' hats and various hair bands, brushes and a tangle of headphones that had somehow found its way in there, to triumphantly claim her mobile.

A number she didn't recognise made her hesitate briefly before pressing the little green phone icon and answering the call. ‘Hello?'

‘Bec? It's Seb.'

‘Seb? How'd you know my mobile number?' she asked, more surprised than annoyed. His deep chuckle on the other end of the phone made her pulse do a funny little skip.

‘I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you,' he told her lightly and without remorse. ‘Where are you? I tried your home phone – you're not at work, are you?'

‘Ah, no. I'm at home. I was outside in the garden and just missed your call.'
Seb
was calling
her
.

‘Do you want to bring the girls out to Dad's tomorrow?' he was saying. ‘They seemed kinda excited about visiting a farm and I thought we might take them down to the creek … if you wanted to.'

‘Sure. That's a great idea. They'll love it.' She tried to keep her tone as casual as his offer. Did she detect a note of diffidence in his voice, or had he just been unsure she'd accept? With a shake of her head, she made herself stop analysing his every move and decided to just accept the invitation for what it was: something to make the girls happy.

They'd be over the moon. Only this morning Sarah had been asking when they could go and visit Seb's farm, and even Natalie couldn't hide her interest. She'd tried to break it to them gently that Seb was an old friend, but they didn't really know him well enough for a visit and it probably wouldn't happen. She could just imagine the ‘I told you so' looks they'd give her once she broke the news. Had they picked up on something she hadn't? Or was it just the innocent assumption kids had that everyone would fall in love with them and want to invite them over to visit?

Fall in love
… Whoa – where had that come from? Now who was being delusional? She and Seb had shared a silly teenage romance, one of those heady, first-love rushes that she should know better than to even think about. This older Seb didn't seem the kind of man who would easily fall in love and especially not with a woman who came with two little extras, no matter how cute they were. He was just being friendly – he didn't know anyone else in the district these days, and he was probably bored out of his brain, stuck out on his dad's place, healing.

‘So come out whenever you're ready; in fact, if you come in the morning, we can make a day of it,' he suggested.

‘Thanks, Seb,' she said, ‘the kids will love it. I'll see you tomorrow.'

He said goodbye and she heard the click of the phone disconnecting. Distracted, she replaced the phone in her handbag and looked out at her backyard thoughtfully. The house phone ringing immediately after brought a smile to her face as she picked it up.

‘What did you forget to tell me to bring?'

The silence that greeted her remark immediately wiped the smile from her face as the familiar heavy breathing started in her ear once more. Slamming the phone down in its cradle, Rebecca moved away from the bench and hugged herself tightly.

Bastard
.

Well, it wasn't going to work, she decided, as the prickly sensation of uncertainty began to fade, replaced by the surge of injustice. He could try all he liked to play his little games. Let him get off on trying to scare the hell out of her – he was the loser. Really, who the hell did that, these days?

Surely whoever it was would lose interest in her once they figured out she wasn't going to fall apart or react at all. She sure as hell wasn't going to needlessly worry her parents, who would insist she drag the police into it. Going to the police would be a waste of time, and she really didn't need to be a pain in their already hectic lives for no purpose – she knew that the police were just as overworked and underpaid as nurses were. The last thing she wanted to do was cause more unnecessary paperwork over something that wasn't going to lead anywhere.

The one thing she knew for certain in this whole warped fiasco was that she was going to do her best to stop wasting time worrying about the stupid prank phone calls.

She went to the cupboard to take down a coffee cup, then took the phone off the hook as she sat and sipped her coffee, needing its warmth to ward off the chill that had invaded her limbs, leaving her feeling exhausted and disturbed.

As Rebecca expected, the girls were beside themselves at the prospect of going to visit a ‘real live farm', as Sarah put it, when she'd told them Seb had invited them out. They were up bright and early – too early for Rebecca's peace of mind – and ready to go.

Sarah was dressed in jeans and a T-shirt, and had dug through her dress-up box to drag out a pink cowgirl hat complete with fake tiara and glitter on the rim. It had come in a show bag her grandparents had bought her a few years before and Rebecca couldn't help smiling at the picture she made. ‘You look gorgeous.'

‘I know. I'm ready. Can we go now?' she asked with the seriousness and unashamed vanity of a child who knew she was loved and adored by all.

Natalie, dressed a little less conspicuously than her younger sister, seemed just as anxious to get moving.

Rebecca packed their swimmers, although it would be too cold at this time of the year to swim in the creek, its water chilled from the mountains that surrounded the farmland where Seb's father lived. Memories of swimming in the same creek as a teenager in the middle of summer flooded though her mind and she recalled how the temperature of the water had taken her breath away – or had it been Seb and that giddy, all-encompassing passion that had taken her breath away?

‘Mum!'

She snapped out of her reminiscences, coming back to earth with a thud as Sarah eagerly hopped from one foot to the other in front of her.

‘Can we go now?'

‘All right! Take the bag out to the car and I'll be right there.'

As they drove out through town and into the open farmland, the kids quizzed her, as they tended to do since coming back, about the things she used to do as a little girl. Her grandparents had owned a small farm on the outskirts of Bowraville, and she took them out for a drive past it, since they were incredibly early and she wanted to kill some time before she landed on Seb's doorstep.

She pulled the car over on the side of the road when they reached her grandparents' farm. Bittersweet memories flooded her as she pointed out the places she used to play, and told the girls stories about when she was their age and the things she used to do. With new owners, the farm had undergone some changes. Gardens had been replanted and rearranged. The owners had extended an open invitation to visit whenever she liked, but the thought of seeing all traces of her past and her grandparents' lives erased from the house kept her from accepting. Sometimes it was best to keep your memories of the things that were important to you intact – special, irreplaceable memories, like the way the house had always smelt, a mixture of cooking and preserves and Pop's molasses, which he ate with his breakfast every morning without fail. The stark reality that her grandparents were no longer there was still something she didn't want to face. There were times that she missed them so much. How could it have been so long ago? Sometimes, it was hard to believe she was sitting here now with children of her own – she felt as though she were talking about a stranger. Time had changed so many things.

‘Can we go to Seb's now?' said Sarah, finally.

Rebecca shook off the melancholy mood the memories evoked. Turning the car around, she retraced the route and headed out to Seb's.

As they inched their way down the driveway, the girls were almost beside themselves with excitement. Angus's dogs bounced around and barked as they pulled up and Rebecca had to hurry to follow the girls as they bounded out, making a beeline for the animals.

A sharp whistle made the dogs drop to the ground and Seb came out of the yard, calling them to his side so the girls could pat them safely. The laughter and delighted squeals made Rebecca smile fondly at the simple joy an animal could give a child. And here she was, dragging her feet over buying a pet for them. Obviously after today, it would be near impossible to continue to fob them off.

‘Look who's here,' a cheerful voice called as Angus came to the fence and watched the commotion at his front gate.

She smiled. ‘Hello, Mr Taylor. I hope we're not disturbing your peace and quiet.'

‘Peace and quiet is highly overrated, my girl. It's nice to hear laughter again … been missing too long around this place,' he told her, watching her girls with delight.

Seeing the mutual admiration of canine and child, it was hard to pick who was having more fun.

Opening the gate to let them in, Seb's father called out, ‘Come on inside, kids, I've got some morning tea all ready.'

The girls ran in ahead of her as Seb came to a stop beside her. ‘I'm glad you could make it.'

Rebecca slid her sunglasses to the top of her head and smiled at him. ‘Sorry we're so early, they were dressed and ready at some obscene hour and I delayed them for as long as humanly possible.'

He grinned and she found herself inspecting this new, older Seb, who was a stranger to her. He seemed to be doing the same, and she wondered what he made of the crow's feet starting in the corner of her eyes and the rounder, post-childbirth figure she now had, and she dropped her gaze self-consciously. He was probably thinking of her at eighteen and wondering what the hell happened.

‘I better go and rescue your dad,' she murmured.

A small smile tugged at his sexy mouth. ‘Trust me, he's in his element, been up since the crack of dawn too. He seems to have mellowed in his old age.'

‘Haven't we all,' she muttered dryly, unable to stop herself from taking a deep breath as she walked past him into the house, catching a faint tang of citrus. She couldn't work out if it was his clothing, his aftershave or his deodorant; whatever it was, she never got tired of smelling it.

The girls gorged themselves on biscuits and the cordial Angus had obviously taken the time to go into town and buy especially for their visit, before they piled into the old four-wheel drive, commonly referred to as the paddock basher, that Seb and his father used as a work vehicle to get around the property. The girls sat on the cracked vinyl seats in the back, heads stuck outside the grimy windows like two excited pups.

Rebecca had forgotten how beautiful it was here, with the green pastures and rolling hills in the background. They pulled up at the creek and the girls squealed in delight as they spotted the white pebbles through the clear water.

‘Can we swim, Mum?' Natalie yelled, as she bounded back and forth between the water's edge and the tree line.

‘I'm positive kids are born with some block to their brain that realistically signals how cold water can be,' Rebecca said as she carefully made her way down the slight embankment. It could be pouring down rain or almost snowing – kids would want to swim if there was water nearby.

‘I recall you used to swim at the drop of a hat,' Seb replied, equally quietly from behind her. ‘Sometimes without swimmers,' he added, a smug edge to his tone.

Rebecca glanced up at the girls to make sure they hadn't mysteriously developed bionic hearing and overheard Seb's last words. ‘Good thing I grew up then, isn't it?' she said without looking back at him. Good grief, there was no way she could look the man in the eye after remembering the few times they'd come to the creek to cool down as teenagers. The water hadn't seemed to work, because by the time they got out, they'd needed to cool their over-heated, over-stimulated teenage hormones all over again.

‘Mum! Can we go for a swim?' Natalie called one more.

‘I suppose so, but stay over this side and don't go out into the middle.' She eyed the swirl of the current in the deeper part of the creek warily. From memory, it had a surprisingly strong pull.

Sitting down on the bank, she smiled as she listened to the high-pitched giggles and squeals as the girls splashed and swam before her. Their voices echoed up and down the gully the creek ran through, and mixed with the familiar sound of birdcalls in the branches of the willow trees that stood guard against erosion, protecting the creek banks from crumbling away.

‘Been a long time since there's been any activity like this down here,' Seb noted from beside her as he picked up two smooth white rocks and rubbed them together. Rebecca let her eyes roam across his hands, so large and capable-looking, callused from long hours working with them outdoors. Not the hands of an office worker.

‘Why do you do what you do?' she asked, suddenly curious.

‘The army?'

‘The SAS. It's above and beyond what you'd always talked about when you wanted to join the army.'

She saw his slight frown, and wondered if he was going to change the subject.

‘After joining, I had a chance to work alongside some SAS guys, and being young and stupid, I guess I wanted to be the best of the best. I had nothing to lose.' He shrugged, turning his gaze back to Natalie and Sarah, splashing in the water happily. ‘So I set my mind to it and made it into the SAS. I can't imagine doing anything else now.'

‘That's a pretty big effort. I don't know much, but I know enough to realise it's not easy to get into.'