Burnout (NYPD Blue & Gold) (21 page)

While Cassie didn’t go into the kitchen, she knew the wall by the refrigerator would still bear the blood and cranial fluids from the man who’d tried to murder her. She also knew from her rookie days working in the worst areas of Manhattan, that kind of stain couldn’t be washed off a white wall. It would have to be painted over. Multiple coats.

On their way out, Mackey had informed Mike that a
Gazette
reporter and his sidekick photographer showed up right when the coroner took Methopolis’ body out on a stretcher. The photographer apparently snapped a few shots for tomorrow’s edition. Mike had scowled, muttering something about media vultures. As directed, Mackey had refused to provide the reporter with any fodder for a story, including the dead man’s name. That, at least, might buy some time.

As he escorted Cassie to the front door of his house, Mike’s jaw tightened. “Eventually, Manici will hear about this.”

“I’ll be long gone before anyone finds out you blew away his hit man.” She swallowed, feeling the burn in her throat. “If I can use your landline, I’ll let my partner and brother know I’m staying at your place.”

When the front door clicked shut behind them, Cassie turned to find Mike watching her. Even now, he was still the most handsome man she’d ever met. Power and strength personified, and not just by his physical presence. It went far deeper than that. It was an inherent part of who he was. Mike could easily have become a high-ranking official in the NYPD, but he’d chosen to make his home in Hopewell Springs. The people of this town would never know how lucky they were.

He took a few steps toward her, his boots echoing on the wood hallway floor. In the shadow cast by the overhead light, his eyes were dark, the same stormy blue they transformed into when he made love. “Cassie, I—”

“What?” She dared to hope.

He took a deep breath before answering. “Phone’s over there.” He flicked on a switch illuminating the small foyer and nodded toward a telephone perched on the hall table.

His police persona was solidly back in place, but for a brief moment she was sure he’d been about to say something else.

“Thanks.” Not wanting to let her emotions show, Cassie nodded and dialed Dom’s cell number. As she waited for her partner to pick up, she glanced at the many framed photos on the table.

One was of Mike as a teenager posing with a German shepherd. The joy on the faces of both dog and boy was clear to see. The other photos were of Mike with his family, some taken inside a restaurant she assumed was his parents’ pub, others with his siblings, including his gorgeous sister, Moira.

When Dom’s voicemail kicked in, Cassie left a message updating him on the situation and providing Mike’s home address. Then she left the identical message on Gray’s cell phone. Odd that neither of them answered their phones. It wasn’t like them to be out of touch for so long.

After hanging up, she turned back to Mike, yawning. “Mind if I use your shower?”

He shook his head and picked up her overnight bag, handing it to her. “You can stay in my bedroom. Top of the stairs, first door on the left. We can talk about the case tomorrow and set up protection for you until you leave town.”

Being careful not to touch Mike’s hand and risk losing what little self-control she had left, Cassie took her bag and headed up the stairs.

Twenty minutes later, steam poured out of the bathroom from the hot shower she’d taken. Cassie pushed up the bedroom windows to let in the cool early morning breeze. The curtains billowed and whipped around her head. The digital clock on the bureau read three a.m. No wonder she was exhausted. On top of everything, she’d barely had two hours sleep in the last two days.

After pulling a short-cropped purple tank over her head, she stepped into a pair of loose white cotton pajama bottoms. She ran a brush through her wet hair, not giving a crap how she looked.

Her throat hurt whenever she swallowed, but it was her heart that pained her the most, and not just for Raven. Every time she thought of the man downstairs guarding her life, the ache in her chest became unbearable.

Soon it will all be over and you’ll never have to face Mike again.

Dom and Gray would probably put her under lock and key until Manici’s trial, guarded twenty-four-seven by the NYPD’s finest—the very thing she dreaded. The same thing that had driven her to Hopewell Springs in the first place. To get away from cops. If her throat wasn’t so raw, she would have laughed at the irony of how badly she’d hoped to spend the rest of her life with one in particular.

The bedside table lamp bathed the bedroom in ghostly shadows. She stared down at her gun, which she’d removed from her soggy handbag. She wished she could wield nothing more dangerous than a spatula for the rest of her life.

No sound came from downstairs. She could imagine how beat Mike must be, especially with his injury. But she knew he wouldn’t sleep. He’d never close his eyes when he’d promised to protect her. It might be over between them, but as long as she remained in Hopewell Springs, he would watch her back. That was his way.

With a painful sigh, she looked around the bedroom. The heavy oak bed reminded her that less than twenty-four hours ago, she and Mike had made exquisite, passionate love. She squeezed her eyes shut as the unforgettable memories they’d made together assailed her senses.

Mike kissing her until she couldn’t breathe. Holding her in his strong arms, tantalizing her sensitized skin with rough fingers as he traced the curves of her face, neck, and breasts. And finally, filling her completely until her body hummed and cried out from the incredible pleasure.

“Oh, God.” Her chest felt as if it would cave in on her heart, collapsing it forever. “I’m going to miss this town,” she whispered. Especially Chief Michael Flannery.

Cassie sank to the bed and gripped the soft, navy blue sheets in her fists, angry at how her life had led to this moment. No other place could possibly feel like home.
This
was her home.
This
was the place she was meant to be. The NYPD couldn’t pay her enough to come back to work. That part of her life was history, and she could never be that person again.

The woman who’d been through the New York City Police Academy and locked up countless bad guys was gone. Now she was just Cassie, a woman who’d fallen desperately in love with a man who didn’t love her back.

Lying down, she buried her face into the fluffy pillow, inhaling the barest hint of Mike’s aftershave. Her body began to shake with gut-wrenching sobs.

Poor Leo. He was an innocent kid, a bystander in all of this, who had his whole life ahead of him.

Until I came into his life like a specter of death. The Grim Reaper with a badge.

Serve and protect?

Yeah, right.

Using a corner of the sheet, she dabbed at the tears cascading down her face, but they wouldn’t stop no matter what she did. She turned on her side toward the open windows to let the breeze caress her damp face.

The mattress shifted, and she stiffened as a pair of powerful arms slid around her shoulders from behind. Mike cradled her, drawing her back against his chest. He tightened his arms and spooned against her body. For a millisecond, Cassie allowed herself to believe this meant something had changed between them, but she knew better.

“Don’t do this.” She clawed at his arms and struggled to free herself.

“Stop fighting and let me hold you.” He tucked in tighter and wedged her head beneath his jaw. “At least for tonight.”

There it was, confirmation that his comfort was only temporary.

Cassie went limp in his arms, and because it was indeed the last time he would ever hold her, she clung to him and cried until she had nothing more to give.

Chapter Twenty

Cassie’s soft, curvy body pressed against Mike. She’d turned in his arms and now faced him with her head nestled beneath his chin, her silky hair tickling his day-old growth of beard. He breathed in her flowery scent, torturing himself by pretending yesterday had never happened, that his whole world hadn’t been jerked out from beneath him. But it had. He was a gullible sap who couldn’t differentiate between the real thing and total bullshit.

Cassie moaned and tilted her face, her lips touching his chin. The movement tugged down her purple shirt, revealing the luscious mounds of her breasts. And the swollen red ring encircling her neck, reminding him of how the night could have ended.

Despite the rage flaring inside him toward the dead assassin, he couldn’t stop his body from responding to Cassie’s enticing curves. Even after her lies, after yesterday’s bloodshed rekindled every painful memory from six years ago, she could still make him want her with unrestrained, intolerable need.

Her fingers grazed over his wound, which had finally stopped jabbing at his insides. She wriggled against him, pressing her thigh intimately against his hardening erection. Again he cursed his body for being so weak, so unable to resist the magnetic pull she had on him.

He could easily assign another officer to stay with Cassie until her brother and partner arrived.

So why don’t I?

Because I don’t trust her life to anyone else.

A breathy sound came from Cassie’s parted lips.

Ah, hell.

A quick dip of his chin and his mouth skimmed hers. Her lips were warm and soft. Full, like the rest of her sexy body.

He covered her body with his, running his hand up and down the side of her rib cage, feathering her breast. She moaned as he kissed her—tasting, savoring her like a starving man. She draped her legs over the backs of his thighs, nestling him tighter against her hips.

“Yes.” The word was a whisper against his lips as she wrapped her arms around his back.

Christ, what he wouldn’t give to forget for a few short hours everything that had come before and everything that awaited them when the sun rose. She was sweet, so, so sweet. And so his for the taking.

Firm, soft hands clawed at his shirt, pulling it from his waistband until her fingers scorched his skin. Hot flashes shot to his groin. He was rock hard and getting more so by the second.

The need to possess her was paramount, not just her body but her mind, her feelings. Her very soul. He wanted it all. Knowing he could never have it sent him over the edge.

As he broke the kiss, green, red-tinged eyes locked with his. She wanted him, too, he was sure of it. What had passed between them may have been only physical, but right now he didn’t give a damn. The physical need was there. Strong. Vibrant. Lingering. But for him it was more, much more.

Fuck.

He stifled a groan, wishing to hell he didn’t still need her. Crave her.

Love her?

It didn’t matter. He might never be capable of forgetting the past, but he could have her this one last time. To remember her by.

Mike covered her mouth with his, demanding and devouring everything she offered. Their lips melded, their tongues probing and seeking. Blood pounded in his temples. His fingers couldn’t get to her bare skin fast enough.

He peeled off her pajama bottoms and shirt, trailing his fingers along her smooth, satiny flesh. She quivered beneath his touch as she watched him from glazed eyes, her chest rising and falling rapidly.

Cassie shivered, her nipples hardening beneath his gaze. He drank in every lovely, naked inch of her, memorizing every curve, every bit of her pale, creamy skin. The bulge at his groin stretched the denim fabric painfully tight.

“You are so beautiful.” He caught her nipples between his thumbs and forefingers. “I wanted you the first time I saw you.” That was the goddamn truth.

She glided her fingers up his forearms to grip his biceps. “I felt the same way about you.” Her lips curved upward into the most seductive smile, and his fingers stilled.

Ignoring the conflicting emotions in his chest, he straddled her thighs, sliding his hands up and down her arms, over her breasts, teasing her nipples until they peaked and jutted out like dark red bullets. She arched into his hands.

“Does that feel good?” He caressed her more firmly.

“God, yes.”

Mike’s pulse beat faster in his chest, in his cock, throughout his entire body. He would give her the most incredible love-making she’d never forget. “What do you want?” He was stunned by the gruffness in his voice. “Tell me and I’ll do it.”

“Touch me.” Her words sounded ragged.

“Where?” His nostrils flared. “Tell me.”

“Here.” She spread her thighs, and he eased his hands down her trembling belly. When he stroked his fingers to her hot mound, cupping her, she groaned. He flicked his finger along her slick, sensitive flesh, and she raised her hips to intensify the contact.

“You’re so wet.” He could barely speak, awed by the sheer beauty and passion of the woman before him. “Where else do you want me to touch you?”

Cassie’s chest rose and fell, jutting her perfect breasts in the air. “My breasts. My nipples.”

Mike leaned down and pulled her nipple into his mouth, continuing to massage the other with his fingers. The nub was hard, tight, and the feel of it on his tongue nearly drove him insane. He lightly bit her nipple, and she inhaled sharply, sifting her fingers through his hair, pressing him tighter against her.

“So good.” Her breasts were warm and firm as he murmured against them. “You smell so fucking good.” His last words came out a growl.

When her hands froze in his hair, it occurred to him he’d never cursed while making love to a woman. He attributed this lapse to his emotional pain, the loss he anticipated when she left town.

He worked his way lower, raining light kisses on her abdomen, above her tantalizing patch of dark red curly hair. He nipped at her flesh, and she bucked her hips. He eased his hands beneath her, cupping her buttocks, raising her to his mouth.

“You smell so sexy, so hot.” He spread her slick flesh wide with his fingers and breathed against her until she was writhing in his hands. “I’m going to taste every inch of you.” He buried his face against her damp mound.

Cassie gasped, a hoarse sound that spiked his lust. He faltered and nearly stopped, remembering the emotional and physical trauma she’d endured. But when she began undulating her hips against his mouth, rational thought was history. Tasting her, feasting on her until he gave her the best damn orgasm of her life, was the only thing driving him.

Gripping her ass tighter, he angled her hips upward. He swiped his tongue again and again over her wet, throbbing clit until her breath quickened and she rocked her head from side to side on the pillow. Mike pumped two fingers in and out, driving her to the brink. She was so wet his fingers made sucking noises as he drove them inside her tight, slick walls.

She clawed her fingers into his short hair until her nails scratched his scalp. He didn’t care. With every breath he drew, her musky scent invaded his senses, driving him to work harder, lick faster, deeper.

She screamed, bucking and writhing as the orgasm slammed into her. The taste of her was so delicious he held on tightly with his mouth and tongue until her screams subsided.

“Mike, please.” Her body went limp and fell to the mattress. She flung her arm over her face, gasping.

He knelt between her legs and gazed down at the incredible sight before him. Sweet Jesus, she really was beautiful. A light sheen of sweat glistened on her breasts. Her hair fanned out in a wild tangle around her head, reminding him of a flaming halo. It was a stupid thought, but if they’d stayed together, he knew he could never get enough of her. Hell, he could barely do it now.

Ignoring the tug on his heart, he rose from the bed and peeled off his ankle holster. Ever wary, he slid the mini-Glock from the holster and placed the gun strategically within reach on the bedside table.

Like Cassie’s, his body was slick with sweat and his clothes stuck to him. He pulled the white polo shirt over his head, and it caught on the bandage on his chest. He saw the concern in Cassie’s eyes but barely felt any physical discomfort from the wound. All his thoughts focused on getting inside her and making slow, tender love to her for the last time. He prayed like hell it would make him forget how much he’d once wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.

He hadn’t realized that until now.

He shucked his remaining clothes and grabbed a condom from the bedside table drawer. After rolling it on, he eased on top of her. Their bodies fit together perfectly, like two interlocking pieces of a puzzle. Thigh to thigh. Hip to hip. Chest to chest, her soft breasts mounding against his pectorals.

Mike plundered Cassie’s mouth, driving his tongue inside, tangling with hers until they were both breathless and crazed with desire. Their bodies rocked together, hips grinding as he slid his cock up and down the opening to her moist slit. His heart pounded, and he could feel hers against his chest, matching it in a frenzied rhythm. As they kissed, their breath became one.

“I need you inside me,” Cassie pleaded.

“Look at me.” He held her head captive between his hands, then drove into her, filling her, and damned if he didn’t feel the most powerful emotion of his life flooding his body and soul. There was a name for it, but he wouldn’t…
couldn’t
acknowledge it. Not now, not ever.

Mike nearly came the second he got inside her. Damn, she was so tight, pulling him in deeper and deeper. He stiffened, shutting his eyes, straining against the need to pound into her and explode. Sucking in air between gritted teeth, he held himself steady until he regained control. He’d about managed that when he opened his eyes. The sight of Cassie’s beautiful face and body writhing beneath him was nearly his undoing.

Her skin was flushed and damp. Her smell was all around him, that sexy, sweet floral scent that drove him crazy. With her lips parted and her eyes half closed, she was the most desirable woman he’d ever seen.

Mike kissed her again, tasting every inch of her hot, sweet mouth, mimicking the plunges of his tongue with equally slow movements as he drove his cock in and out. One thing was certain. He could never get enough to ease the craving he had for her.

One. Last. Time.

The simple touch of her hands running over his back, her nails digging into his skin, made him rock harder. Watching her while she screamed his name was his goal.

She tightened around him, her nipples jutting against his chest as she arched her back. Her breath came in little gasps. Beautiful breasts jerked up and down from the force of his thrusts. She gripped his upper arms tighter, squeezing his biceps.

“Come for me.” Sliding his hands beneath her shoulders, he increased the tempo. A drop of sweat fell from his brow onto her breast before rolling down the side of her rib cage.

He sucked her lower lip between his teeth, then slanted his mouth across hers and plunged his tongue inside. Her hips came off the bed to meet his. Their sweat-slicked bodies slapped together wildly.

“Let it go, baby.” Mike pounded into her. “Scream if you want to.”

She arched once more and did scream. He continued thrusting into her tightness, wanting to be sure she experienced everything he could give. His own orgasm built and built, first in his balls, then shooting to his cock. He thrust once more and shouted, exploding with everything he had.

Without thinking, Mike did what came naturally. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her again and again.

When she whispered, “I love you,” his heart froze.

Elaine had used the same three words on him the night before she told him she’d only been doing her job. Her
job
. He’d felt raped.

Mike jerked himself onto his forearms. Cassie gazed up at him, but it was no longer Cassie lying beneath him. No longer Cassie he was still buried deep inside. It was Elaine looking up at him.

Words flew from his mouth before he could stop them. “Sure you do.”

Elaine’s—no, Cassie’s—forehead wrinkled. Her lips quivered, and a single tear spilled from each of her eyes down her temples.

Shit.

Mike shook his head to clear it. For a second, what he saw in those shimmering emerald eyes—what days before he might have interpreted as real love—stunned him.

He cocked his head as a sound came to him—muffled footsteps.

Someone was charging up the stairs.

Mike lunged for his Glock on the bedside table. He whipped his arm around and aimed at the open bedroom door.

From the corner of his eye, he glimpsed Cassie’s gun in her hand, also aimed in the same direction.