Broken Trust (6 page)

When Mac finished reading, he
released a shuddering breath. He laid the letter in his lap and looked away. It
felt as though his heart had risen to his throat, choking off his air supply.
Eric might still be alive if only…

“What does it mean, Mac? He said he
had some trouble with one of the other men and if something happened to him, I
should have you open his files and trust no one but you. Who did he have
trouble with?”

“I don’t know.” He spoke slowly. “A
couple days before our last mission, Eric seemed worried about something, but
he wouldn’t tell me what. I figured maybe you and Cara had another fight and he
was concerned about you.”

“No, we didn’t fight any more than
usual. Eric wanted me to sell Dad’s shoe store, but Grandma still won’t agree.”
She shook her head.

“He could have stumbled upon
something in his intelligence work.”

“Like what?” She stood and paced
the floor. “He was afraid, Mac. He didn’t make a big deal over it in his
letter, but you know Eric. He never wanted to worry me. What could be serious
enough for him to believe someone might harm him?”

He met her gaze, his mind filled
with turmoil. Why hadn’t Eric confided in him? Eric must have believed Toni
would be safe, or he wouldn’t have drawn her into whatever this was. All Mac
could figure was that Eric had tried to protect him too, and Mac had—

He couldn’t finish the thought. “I
think it’s possible we’re talking about espionage.”

Toni’s eyes rounded as she sank
back into her chair, looking deflated. “Espionage? As in spies and stolen
microdots?”

“The technology is a bit more
sophisticated now, but yes. Eric has shown me a few techniques that would
surprise you. Really advanced stuff.”

“Eric would never be involved in
espionage.” Her mouth tightened.

“I know. But it’s possible he
stumbled onto someone who was. In his letter, he mentioned some files I should
open.”

“Do you think someone planned to…to
kill him?”

Mac forced his hands to relax as he
shook his head. “I have no reason to believe our last mission had anything to
do with Eric.”

No, the ambush had been set for the
entire special ops team. The Taliban had intended to kill all of them. Mac had
been lucky to escape with his life.

And then a thought struck him. Was
it possible someone planned to have the Taliban wipe out the entire team just
to ensure Eric died in the skirmish? It seemed a bit farfetched, especially
considering how Eric died. The military was good at hiding facts. Toni and her
family knew only what they’d been told. That Eric had died during a routine
battle against Taliban fighters. She and her family didn’t know the truth.

Yet.

Toni’s brow crinkled and she gasped
as if a startling thought had occurred to her. “Mac, you don’t think that man
who tried to kill me today has anything to do with this. I mean, how could he
know about Eric’s letter?”

“No, I think he was just an angry
driver. From your description of the man, I know he’s not from Clarkston.”

“He looked like he was from the
Middle East.”

“A Middle Easterner here on Thorne
Mountain? Maybe he was an irritated tourist.”

“Do you know what files Eric is
referring to in his letter?”

“No. Did he include anything else
with his letter?”

She shook her head. “Just some
pictures he took with his digital camera. He usually sent me a disc of photos
with his letters, but this time he sent me a small memory flash drive. I
printed the pictures off, but there weren’t any secret files on there that I
could see.”

“Did you bring the flash drive with
you by chance?”

She reached around her neck and
pulled out a thin, black lanyard with a USB drive hanging on one end, no bigger
than her thumb. “When I get home, I can email you the pictures if you want them
in an electronic format.”

Mac shook his head. “Too bad we
don’t have electricity and a computer handy. I want to take a look at that
flash drive.”

Her eyes widened as she stared at
the USB drive lying on her open palm. “You think there are secret files hidden
on it? Something I overlooked?”

He shrugged. “Who knows? I also
want to make a phone call to my commanding officer. Colonel Wilkinson recently
retired and is living near Vegas. He should still have enough clout to pull
some strings and gain access to Eric’s personnel file.”

She twirled a strand of her golden
hair. “You think that’s the file Eric referred to in his letter?”

“It’s a place to start, along with
the flash drive.”

“Can you trust the Colonel?”

He gave one, brisk nod. “I think
so. But don’t get your hopes up. Eric and I belonged to the MARSOC team. All
special forces files are top secret. In the morning, we’ll get your car and
I’ll drive you into Clarkston. The Colonel’s retired, now. It might take him
some time to pull a few strings to check Eric’s file. I can call you at your
home in Vegas as soon as I hear anything.”

“Okay.”

A long, swelling silence followed.
He longed to tell her his feelings, to beg her forgiveness. If he told her the
truth and then discovered he was wrong, he might create a real problem for the Marine
Corps. He’d taken an oath of secrecy, but wished he could confide in someone.

He held his breath, waiting. The
anguish in her eyes broke his heart, what little he had left. “Toni, I’m so
sorry.”

She held up a hand. “Don’t, Mac.
Just leave it in the past.”

“Actually, I was speaking about
Eric.”

A scowl tugged at her forehead.
“Nothing can bring him back. Just let it go.”

Let it go? If only it were that
easy. He’d hidden here in the mountains, hoping to forget. It seemed he could
run and hide from everyone.

Except himself.

“I need a friend right now, Mac.”
Her voice sounded watery. “I can’t figure out Eric’s letter without your help.”

He could barely speak around the
lump in his throat. “I’ll help you, Toni. I’ll always be here for you. No
matter what.”

He wished for more, but that just
made him feel worse. He’d let his selfishness ruin what they’d once shared.

Toni crossed her long legs. “Cara’s
been dealing with severe depression and Grandma stopped spending time with her
older friends. Eric’s death hit us all pretty hard.”

“I’m sorry for that.” His sense of
guilt deepened. He should have been there for Eric’s family, but he’d been
ravaged by a fever from his bullet wound up until three weeks ago.

She turned away, biting her lower
lip, her eyes sparkling with tears. From what Mac could see, Toni needed time,
too.

Voices came from outside. The
sounds of boots clomped across the deck, followed by a knock on the cabin door
before it opened. Hank walked in carrying several sticks of kindling. “Sorry to
intrude, but it’s raining out here.”

Toni sat back, wiping her eyes, her
face flushed with color. Hank walked to the wood box and dumped the firewood,
then brushed a gnarled hand against his leather vest.

“Wooee! It’s coming down in sheets,
but rain sure makes the air smell nice.” Inez came in followed by Grunt. She
brushed raindrops from her arms before closing the door.

Toni gave a half-hearted smile.
“I’d forgotten how beautiful rain on the lake can look this time of year.”

Dad cleared his throat. “No place
prettier than Crystal Lake. Wish we could stay for the winter, but it’s too
cold and the snows come too deep. You should come here in the fall, when all
the leaves change color.”

“I’d like that,” Toni said.

“We’ll plan on you next fall. You two
ought to stop this nonsense and get back together,” Hank said.

“Dad.” Mac shot his father a
warning look.

Hank pursed his lips, staring at
his son. “Well, it’s true. Anyone can see you’re both still crazy about each
other. And after what you’ve been through losing Eric, you should cherish life
together now more than ever.”

Mac glanced at Toni and found her
staring into the fire. “Dad, please don’t.”

Inez huffed, then headed for the
back of the cabin. “I’m done in. Don’t stay up too late.”

Mac watched Toni, wondering at her
reaction to his father’s blunt words. Toni didn’t say anything, her eyes filled
with so much sadness he thought she might cry. Both of them knew she’d never
come here again. A sense of melancholy sifted over him and he turned away, wishing
he could go back in time and change things between them.

Hank thumped around in the kitchen,
helping himself to another bowl of cherry cobbler. “You want some?”

Both Mac and Toni shook their
heads. Considering the circumstances, Mac was grateful for the interruption.

Toni folded Eric’s letter and
returned it to her purse as Hank plopped down on the comfy sofa and kicked off
his boots.

She stood. “I think I’ll turn in,
too. Good night.”

“Good night,” Hank called as he
stuffed a spoonful of cobbler into his mouth.

Mac watched Toni follow Inez into
the women’s bunk room. A hard knot of regret lodged in his chest. He laid his
head back against the chair and closed his eyes, his mind filled with turmoil.

More than anything, he wished he
could tell Toni the truth.

Chapter Six

Toni awoke in the middle of the
night. Her teeth chattered and she pulled the blankets higher about her chin.
When she glanced at Inez in the opposite bunk, she found the woman sleeping
soundly. Hank’s snores came from the men’s room next door, loud as a chain saw.
As she turned her head, Toni caught the glow of the crackling fire. Earlier,
Inez had opened the door so heat could filter into their room. It hadn’t helped
much. The fire burned low, its faint light still reassuring as she listened to
the smattering of rain outside her window.

Surely the gunman had fled the
mountains by now. He wouldn’t be foolish enough to stay during a heavy
rainstorm. The thought brought her comfort. She’d prayed, asking the Lord to
protect them all. A feeling of peace rested upon her and she knew they were
safe for the time being.

A murmur from Mac caught her
attention. She rolled to her left side, curling up to warm herself. From this
angle, she could see his head and shoulders as he lay in the recliner before
the fire. Dressed in a long-sleeved sweatshirt, he thrashed his arms, his brow
crinkled with anguish.

“Incoming! Take cover!” he cried.

Inez sat up and slid her feet into
her slippers before padding into the outer room. “Michael? Wake up, son. You’re
having another nightmare.”

Hank’s voice rasped as he joined
his wife and called to his son. “Mac, wake up.”

Toni lay still, watching as Mac
jerked and opened his eyes wide. Startled, he sat up too fast. The recliner
popped and the footrest snapped back, jarring his injured leg. In the shadowed
light, Toni saw his cringe of pain as he reached for his lower calf.

“Steady,” Inez soothed and pressed
her hand against Mac’s shoulder. “Do you need another pain pill?”

He blinked as Hank lit a kerosene
lantern and set it nearby on the desk.

“No, sorry I woke you.” Mac spoke
between gritted teeth as he pressed his palms against the bandages.

Toni couldn’t see Mac’s parents,
but she heard Hank’s gravelly voice. “It might help if you talk about it, son.
You can confide anything to Mom and me.”

“You know I can’t. Not until the
investigation is complete.”

Investigation? What did he mean?

“Oh, phooey,” Inez blurted. “A son
can tell his parents anything. I hate seeing you torn up like this. Keeping it
bottled inside won’t help you heal.”

Mac shook his head, drawing great
drafts of air into his lungs like it might settle his nerves. “I don’t want to
lay my burdens on you two. I think I’ve caused enough pain already.”

“Then give your burdens over to the
Lord. He can carry anything you hand Him,” Hank encouraged.

Mac’s face went hard and anger
flashed in his eyes. “God didn’t save my men. Praying won’t bring them or Eric
back.”

Toni flinched at his harsh tone.
She had no idea he felt so angry at the Lord.

“You can’t go on blaming yourself,”
Hank said.

“Why not? It was my fault,” Mac
growled.

“It wasn’t your fault all those men
died. You fought to save Eric’s life. It just happened.”

A long sigh whispered past Mac’s
lips and he turned to face the fire. “What does it matter now? He’s gone.”

“It might help if you talk with one
of those doctors who deals with post-trauma stress,” Inez suggested.

Toni tensed. She’d heard of
soldiers returning from war, haunted by horrible things they’d done and
witnessed in battle. She had no doubt Mac suffered from post-traumatic stress
disorder and she felt powerless to help him. In spite of his once-strong faith,
it now appeared he’d turned his back on God. How could he face this difficulty
without his Father in Heaven by his side?

“I’ve talked to plenty of doctors
and they can’t help me. I just need time,” Mac said.

Hank gave a deep sigh. “I hope
that’s all you need. We’ll be here for you if you need us, son. And the Lord’s
there always. He waits for us to come to Him.”

“He wasn’t there for me in
Afghanistan, and I don’t need Him now.”

Toni cringed at the resentment in
Mac’s voice. Last night, when he’d refused to bless the food, she’d been
stunned. God was such an important part of her life. Without Him, she couldn’t
imagine battling the grief of losing her brother and parents. She’d be
completely lost.

“God was there with you in
Afghanistan, son,” Inez assured him. “He brought you home.”

“Well, He saved the wrong man.”

Toni’s heart shredded. If she had
to choose, would she rather Mac had died instead of Eric?

No! She adored Eric, but she
couldn’t choose between the two men. She loved them both and their lives meant
everything to her.