Broken (26 page)

It was
Halona
.

I slowed down. I did not want to scare her but as I
came closer I noticed that she was unafraid. She knew perfectly well who I was.
I went up to her and stood in front of her. She was wearing a white nightgown
that fluttered in the gusts coming off the water. She kneeled in front of me
and grabbed my face between her hands. She stroked my fur gently and touched my
ears with astonishment in her deep brown melancholic eyes. Then she laughed
without making a sound. She became deadly serious. She stared into my eyes
trying to find me. Then she focused and I could hear her in my mind again. At
first the words were incoherent, then she added images. Like a puzzle I needed
to put the pieces into the right order. I sensed her voice as a mere humming
before actual words appeared. The hum of the voice became thin. Suddenly I
managed to decipher what she was saying. My heart stopped. I understood what
she was trying to tell me.

Aiyana
was in trouble. In my mind’s eye I saw devastating images of her in a small
room. Locked up in a cage so small she could hardly move, trying desperately to
get out, and roaring, yelling, calling for me to help her. Calling for
Luyu
. The cage was surrounded with barbed wire and she was
bleeding where it had ripped her skin. Her screams cut through me like a knife.

I stepped backwards and tried to escape the images but
I couldn't. They kept coming at me and I felt
Aiyana's
pain.

Stop, stop, stop
, I
thought and hoped
Halona
would hear me.
I can't take it. It's enough
.

Save her
Howahkan
,
she whispered in my thoughts.
She needs you.

I
barely made it inside before the change came. As soon as I regained my strength
from
the transformation I ran upstairs. I took a quick
shower and dressed. I woke William up and went downstairs where Sarah had just
started making coffee and William's breakfast.

"You're both up mighty early," she said with
a cheerful voice.

William still hadn't quite opened his eyes yet. He
groaned and sat by the breakfast counter.

"Well I have a lot to do today," I said and
swallowed my coffee in quick gulps. "Eat your breakfast, William." My
heart was racing as I watched him eat his cereal. The caffeine certainly didn't
make it better. The pictures of
Aiyana
trapped kept
appearing in my head. I had seen her there; I had seen the cage that was way
too small for her when she was the jaguar so she couldn't even stand up, not without
touching the wires. And as soon as I saw them I knew exactly where she was.

I called Julie from the
car after having dropped William off. I told her I wasn't coming in. She became
quiet and I could almost hear her shake her head in disbelief.

"You can't keep doing this, Dr.
Langaa
,” she said. "What do you want me to tell those
poor people whose appointments you keep cancelling?"

"You know what? Tell them if they are willing to
wait then their operation will be on me. I'll pay for all of them."

Julie went quiet. "Okay. I could do that. But ...
I know it's none of my business but what's going on with you?"

"I don't have time to explain, Julie. It's a huge
emergency. That's all I can say for now."

"Is Heather ... I mean I know that Mrs.
Langaa
... is sick. Has something happened to her? Cause I
would perfectly understand if ...”

I exhaled. "It's not Heather. Yes she is sick but
it's not about her. Not this time."

"It's not William is it? Oh my God, has something
happened to William?"

"No. William is in school and is perfectly fine.
Listen. This is very private. There is no need for the rest of the clinic to
know about it. I need you to keep this as quiet as possible, okay? Just tell
everybody that I am not coming in today and I will be back tomorrow. There is
nothing for you to worry about except keeping this to yourself and making sure
that the patients get the message. Alright?"

"If you say so, doctor, then alright."

I hung
up the car-phone just as I drove into
Aiyana's
neighborhood. I parked the car
at a local CVS nearby - in
order to not draw too much attention to myself, and walked - halfway ran - the
rest of the way to her house. Nothing about it seemed different. The small
yellow house was calm and quiet on the street. A dog barked at me from the neighbors'
house across the street. A few distrusting eyes were staring at me from porches
nearby. I rang the bell to her house. I don't know what I had expected, but my
plan was to just burst in as soon as he opened the door and then find her. I
brought my gun and had it in my jacket. Now I placed my hand on the handle. I
was shaking all over in rage, shivering despite the intense heat. Michael had
put her in those dog cages and put barbed wire on them to deliberately hurt her
and keep her from escaping. What kind of sick bastard would do such a thing?

I heard no sounds coming from inside the house and I
rang the bell again. Still nothing. My grip on the gun-handle became tighter,
my breathing heavier. Then I opened the screened door and pounded on the front
door.

"Open up!" I yelled. "I know she’s in
there, you bastard!"

Still quiet as the grave. A sudden fear came upon me
that he might have moved her so I wouldn't find her again. My heart was pumping
fast now and I could hear the blood rushing through my veins. In the middle of
it I suddenly heard a small still voice inside of me. It was hers. What a
relief to finally hear her again! She was still alive.

In the back, she whispered, her voice weak and worn
out. The room in the back. Come to the window.

The room in the back. Of course. It was there I had
seen the two cages when I had been in the house. The cages meant for dogs, much
smaller than a jaguar.

I ran around the house and looked carefully in through
a window. All I saw was a bedroom I assumed was
Aiyana
and Michael's. I felt the rage build up inside of me combined with a
desperation and helplessness that I couldn't overcome. It filled me, it enraged
me. In there they had made love, they had been a married couple. They had a
child together. And now this? I hurried past it and looked in another window.
What I saw there struck me hard. Even if I was prepared, even if I had already
seen the horror in my vision, in my mind, it was still unbearable,
excruciating, like a burning in my heart. There she was.
Aiyana
was in a cage on the floor unable to get up, unable to even sit upright without
bending her head. She was bleeding from several wounds on her face and back.
She was naked, exposed and powerless. Her skin was ripped from the barbed wire
all over her body, her arms, legs and back. Her hair was tangled and stuck to
the wire on the front. Oh the cruelty of it. She couldn't move. If she did she
would hurt herself. She was curled up completely still on the bottom of the
cage. I started crying, powerless to stop those tears running down my cheeks. I
put the palm of my hand on the window to let her know I was there. My body was
throbbing, the pain, the agonizing pain inside of me. She didn't even try to
turn her head and look at me. She sent me thoughts.

You have to leave, she said. I am glad you came but
you have to get away from me now. You’re being here is dangerous.

No! I will never leave you in there, I replied. I
could never leave you in that ... in that thing, that instrument of torture. I
need to get you out now! I will get you out!

Her voice in my mind was calm and sweet. I admired her
way of remaining peaceful even in a situation like this.
There is no
way, Christian. I brought this upon myself. It's my own fault.

A fear, a feeling rose inside of me. Was this all my
fault? Did he do this to you because of me? Was it because you spent the day
with me in the swamps? It was. Wasn't it? Because you never made it home? Oh my
God, the agonizing pain. Had I really caused this to happen to her? I am so
sorry. I will make this right again, I cried. I will help you get out of there
and away from him.

Christian. You can't. There is nothing anyone can do.

Of course there is. I’m going to come in there now and
get you out. Break the window if I have to. Then I am going to call the police
on him. Make him pay for what he has done.

No! You can't Christian. You mustn't. You have to stay
out of this. For me. For my sake. Please listen to me.

I was crying hard now, breathing heavily almost
hyperventilating. Why did she keep telling me to stay out of this? Why couldn't
I help her?
Why
Aiyana
? I don't
understand!

Because he has
Luyu
. He says
he will never let me see her again if I escape. If I leave him. He has her
somewhere. He is hiding her from me.
 
As long as I stay in here she will be fine. He says he will not harm
her.

Crying hard, desperately, I leaned my face and both
hands on the window. I wanted to touch her, to hold her in my arms, rescue her
from this inhuman pain. The fact that I couldn't save her tormented me.

There is nothing you can do Christian. You have to go.
At night I become the jaguar and that's when I hurt myself. I don't want you to
see it. I cannot restrain myself when I am the jaguar. The animal cannot bear
to be locked up. So she fights in vain. I spend all day trying to heal my
wounds. Dreading the change, fearing the sunset and the transformation.

Maybe I will be able to find her? I cried.

No! You can't do anything, Christian. I will not risk
her life for mine. If he sees you anywhere near me or her he will kill her. He
is crazy, Christian. You cannot reason with craziness like his. All I can do is
to play along and hope for him to some day be merciful enough to let me out.

I put my back against the wall and slid down in the
grass. I hid my face in my hands while I cried. My entire body was trembling.

I am not going to leave you here. I will not leave you
here alone, I argued.

You must go now Christian. If anyone sees you here...

I got up on my feet and wiped the tears off with the
back of my hand. Then I turned and stared at my beloved in her cage of pain. I
took in a deep breath.

This is not the end of it,
I said, clenching my teeth.

Go Christian. Just go.

Then I ran. Sobbing, sniveling, crying hard, almost
screaming at times - I escaped to my car.

Chapter 31

Once I
was able
to think straight I grabbed my car-phone and
called my lawyer.

I asked him if he knew a good private investigator. He
recommended a man by the name Morgan and said he was the best money could buy.
I asked my lawyer to contact the private investigator and let him call me as
soon as humanly possible. Money was no object.

Then I hung up. Two can play this game, I thought to
myself. I had promised
Aiyana
not to put
Luyu
in further danger. But I certainly wasn't going to
just sit still and wait for Michael's mercy. I was getting
Aiyana
out of that cage.

Then I picked up the phone and called Sarah. Told her
I had to work and probably wouldn't be home until the next day so I needed her
to take care of William and to let him know that I would be home as soon as
possible. She thanked me for warning her in advance this time.

I put the phone down. No more than two minutes went by
before I had the investigator on the phone. I told him I needed to find
someone.

"A young girl only five years old. The father has
kidnapped her. But you'll have to be very discreet. If he suspects we are on to
him in any way he has threatened to kill the child. Discretion is of the utmost
importance. You'll probably have to follow him when he picks her up from
school. Now I don't know which school she goes to, but that should be easy to
figure out. Just find out where he is hiding her and report back to me. Then
I'll have to decide how we proceed from there. Money is absolutely no problem.
I will pay whatever it takes to get this girl back to her mother."

"Got it," Morgan said. "Just give me
the girl's name and I'll find her."