Authors: Matthew Tomasetti
Tags: #vampire, #urban fantasy, #paranormal romance, #supernatural, #werewolf, #parody, #lycan, #new adult
“If anyone can, he can,” Tinch said. “But
don’t get your hopes up. Jimmy is in a rough spot and we all have
to accept the fact he may not make it.”
Candy shook her head. “It’s not
fair.”
“Not much in life is fair, and even less so
when vampires are involved,” Tinch said. “That’s why I told
everyone to stay put.”
“Easy for you to say,” White Paul grumbled.
“You weren’t here trying to protect some ditzy blonde from insane
vampires.”
Candy couldn’t stop herself from crying. They
had Jimmy, it was her fault, and White Paul was adamant about
taunting her with that fact. Tinch looked as if he wanted to hit
White Paul for his audacity.
“What did I teach you?” Tinch said in a
surprisingly calm manner. “You have vampires on your tail, you run
away. You swallow your pride and you get the fuck out of there. But
what did you do? You went right into the heart of their territory.
I expected more from you, from all of you.”
The room went silent for a long time before
Tinch continued, “All we can do now is move on. Learn from your
mistakes.” He sighed and shook his head. “Let’s get this place
cleaned up before The Alpha gets here.”
Felicia ran back down the stairs in an outfit
she might have borrowed from Anastasia. She put her golden-red hair
up in a pony tail, slapped on far too much blue eyeliner, red blush
and lipstick, and crammed her narrow hips into skintight green
shorts. She had on a plain white shirt that had been cut with
scissors well above her navel so the black bra could be seen
beneath. All of the Misfits except Medium Dave rolled their
eyes.
“Is he here?” she said.
Melvin shook his head and started tidying up
with White Paul. Were-Jew and Tinch went into the dining room to
clean up in there. Felicia pulled one of the chairs out from the
table so she could look down the hallway at the front
door.
“What’s with . . . ?” Candy waved her hand,
gesturing at the way Felicia was dressed.
“You heard Tinch. The
Alpha
is coming!”
Felicia said.
“Who’s that?”
Before Felicia could answer, the door opened
and then slammed shut. A tall man built like a Mack truck stomped
down the hall into the living room. He had long brown hair and
thick mutton chops on his chiseled face. His menacing eyes passed
over everyone before halting on Medium Dave. Candy could only
assume he was The Alpha, considering the way everyone gawked at him
in reverence—rather, how they
didn’t
look him in the eyes,
including Tinch.
“Holy mother of God,
what
the fuck are
you wearing?” The Alpha said in a scratchy voice that tickled a
curious spot in the back of Candy’s brain. Medium Dave looked down
at himself with a child’s ignorance. The Alpha barked, “I suggest
you take your candy-ass out of my presence before I beat the stupid
out of you.”
Red faced, Medium Dave retreated into the back
yard. Candy couldn’t believe how much of an asshole this guy was
and she had only known him for ten seconds.
The Alpha went on at a near yell, “Who’s in
charge of this outfit?”
Melvin raised his hand. “I am,
sir.”
The Alpha stomped over to him. “What’s your
name, boy?”
Melvin gave a barely audible answer. Without
warning, The Alpha punched him in the gut. Melvin doubled over with
a sickly groan and Candy clasped her hands over her mouth. The
Alpha impatiently waited for the skinny leader of the Misfits to
struggle back to his feet.
“Why
did I have to come all the way out
to this shithole?” he growled. He looked around at everyone, his
eyes pausing longest on Felicia and Candy. “Can you tell me
why
I had to leave my women behind to come all the way out
here to fix your fucked up problems?”
“I apologize, sir,” Melvin managed to
groan.
The Alpha grunted, turned to Felicia, and
swept her off her feet. She threw her arms around his neck and
yelped with glee as he carried her away upstairs. Tinch informed
everyone that he had some things to take care of and then he
hurried out of the house. A moment later, Medium Dave stuck his
head in through the door and, seeing the room clear of The Alpha,
he ventured back in. Clutching his stomach, Melvin waved Candy off
when she tried to put her arm around his shoulder to
help.
“What’s up with that asshole?” Candy
said.
Everyone glared at her.
“Be careful what you say,” White Paul said.
“He’s The Alpha. I suggest you do as we do. Nod your head and say
‘sir.’ ”
“I’m not calling him ‘sir.’ What the hell did
he punch Melvin for? He’s an asshole.”
“He’s the asshole who’s going to save your
ass,” Were-Jew said.
Candy rolled her eyes. “Whatever. What are we
going to do about Jimmy?”
“Nothing,” Melvin said. “We don’t do anything
unless The Alpha says.”
White Paul slammed his fist on the table.
“Fuck that!” He glanced over his shoulder to make sure no one was
there, and then he leaned in and kept his voice low. “We don’t have
time to wait on The Alpha while he—” He waved his hand towards the
stairs. “Jimmy’s in a nest of vampires right now. What happened to
leave no Misfit behind? It’s a death sentence, Melvin. He’s our
brother.”
Melvin was torn. Candy saw the turmoil
seething in his blue eyes and she knew he didn’t want to leave
Jimmy behind. They were like brothers. They were a
family.
“You’re right. Leave no Misfit behind,” Melvin
said.
Felicia let out a scream of pleasure upstairs.
The Alpha howled and then the bed pounded against the floor so
forcefully the ceiling shook overhead. Everyone tried to ignore it,
but Candy couldn’t stop her face from turning red.
“We have less than eleven hours to figure
something out,” White Paul said.
Plaster fell from the ceiling as the rhythmic
pounding continued.
“Where are we supposed to trade Candy for
Jimmy?” Were-Jew said. Before Candy could protest, he held out a
hand. “We’re not trading you,” he assured her. “I just want to know
where it’s supposed to be.”
Medium Dave shrugged.
“Can you call and find out?” Melvin
said.
The overhead fan swung wildly. The wailing and
howling upstairs drowned out whatever Medium Dave was about to say
so he nodded instead. He waited for a lull in the noise then he
quickly said, “They won’t be up until the evening, but I can try to
get in touch with someone before then.”
Candy considered saying she could try calling
Blake, but the thought of talking to him after what happened the
night before infuriated her. If anything, Blake and his stupid
mother were just as much to blame for what happened to Jimmy as
anyone else.
The ceiling fan shook so violently it
threatened to fly off. The Misfits needed to shout if they wanted
to be heard as rusty bed springs joined in on the noise. The
Alpha’s roar thundered down the stairs, “Who’s your
daddy!”
“For the love of God!” Melvin stood up and
went to the sliding glass door. Everyone evacuated into the back
yard.
“Okay,” White Paul said. “Dave will get the
information for us. I say we tell those British bastards that we’ll
do the trade and then sneak right into their house and get Jimmy
out.”
“That’s risky. Do you remember the security at
the Mullin’s?” Were-Jew said. “I’m sure the Brits have at least the
same.”
“What then?”
Were-Jew thought for a moment. “An ambush. If
we know where they are coming from and where they are going, we can
hit them along the way. It will be an extraction mission: hit them,
get Jimmy, then get the hell out. I can run resistance to buy
time.”
“Sounds like a plan,” White Paul said. They
all knew he wanted to do some serious damage. Candy didn’t doubt a
polar bear
could
do some serious damage.
They discussed the details of the mission in
the backyard for nearly half an hour. Figuring The Alpha had to be
done by now, they walked slowly back inside. It sounded all
clear.
The pounding began again at a vigorous pace. A
crack shot across the ceiling and plaster fell to the ground in a
cloud of white dust. Candy had to cover her ears from the maddening
howls. And then it stopped. Slowly, the overhead fan eased in its
wobble.
“About time,” Melvin said. “Felicia must be
dead.”
“She always gets like that,” Were-Jew said
with a shrug.
The Alpha came downstairs buck naked, his body
glistening with sweat. Candy couldn’t turn her head fast enough as
he rounded the banister at the bottom of the stairs. She ended up
gawking at his well muscled legs and his chiseled granite butt.
When she saw the size of his swinging manhood, she blushed and
turned her eyes to the floor. The Alpha’s bareness didn’t perturb
the Misfits. Still in the granny dress, Medium Dave’s eyes went
wide and he ran through the back door before the naked man came
into the room.
“Now that hit the spot,” The Alpha said as he
combed his long and slightly damp hair. “I’m ravished. Someone
order food.”
Melvin flipped open his phone and wandered
into the kitchen. The Alpha shook out his hair until it rested
about his shoulders and then he turned to Were-Jew.
“One of you pussies fill me in on what
happened here. From what Tinch told me, you’ve been having problems
with British vampires. And now I hear all hell has broken loose.
There better be a damn good reason.”
“Sir,” Were-Jew said reluctantly. “There was
an incident last night. A vampire of high status was
slain.”
“A vampire of high status?” The Alpha said
with a slight grin. “Who did the deed?”
“Jimmy.”
“No shit? Jackass? I would have never
thought.”
“Yes, sir,” Were-Jew went on. “But they’re
holding him prisoner now.”
The Alpha crossed his rugged arms over his
barrel chest. Candy had to concentrate to keep her eyes on the
floor and not on his bare form. Though he may have been a
despicable asshole, he had the body of a god.
“Tell me about this incident.”
Were-Jew’s eyes flashed to Candy as he said,
“It’s complicated, sir. Didn’t Tinch fill you in?”
“Don’t ask me questions,
pencil-dick.”
“Yes, sir. Sorry, sir,” Were-Jew said, shaking
a little. He cleared his throat before he continued. “There was a
duel between two vampire families last night. The British family
won and wanted the girl they were fighting over. Jimmy didn’t want
them to take her and he challenged the head of the British family.
He killed him.”
“Slow down, son. What kind of a duel? I love
when vampires kill each other.”
“It was a basketball game, sir.”
The Alpha’s face slackened into a frown. “A
basketball game? How are you having problems with vampires that
play basketball?”
No one said anything.
The Alpha grinned and shook his head. “So
Jackass killed a vampire over a girl? Young men will go to no
length chasing tail. So who’s the girl that has this shithole in
such a stir I had to come all the way down here to wipe your asses
for you?”
Were-Jew inclined his head to Candy. “Her
name’s Candy,” he said.
When The Alpha turned to Candy, she lifted her
eyes to meet his. She refused to let him intimidate her like he did
the Misfits. He looked her up and down with an appreciative
smile.
“I can see why,” he said, his eyes resting on
her chest. “I’d like to take you for a spin.”
Candy’s mouth fell open. If he wasn’t so
intimidating she would have done what she wanted and called him a
pig. Considering everything that had happened over the last several
days, she didn’t want to take the chance as to what an alpha
werewolf would do if she pissed him off.
“Too bad she doesn’t have the feral blood.
Normal people fuck like wet rags.” He pushed the hair away from her
shoulder and neck; it was all she could do to not swat his hand.
She didn’t care who or how important he was. He was a complete
asshole.
“And too bad she’s a vamp tramp,” he
said.
“I am not a vamp tramp, you prick!” Candy
didn’t even know what exactly a vamp tramp was, but she had a good
guess and she didn’t like it.
The Alpha gave a perfectly white-toothed grin.
“She’s feisty. What say you let me make a real woman out of you? I
promise you’ll beg for more.”
Candy couldn’t have known how bad what she
said next would be, and neither did she stop to choose her words
carefully. “You’re worse than those bloodsucking British
scumbags.”
Were-Jew and White Paul’s eyes nearly popped
out of their heads. As Melvin came back into the room, he dropped
his phone and stared at Candy as if he was looking at a ghost. Her
face splotched red and she took an impulsive step away from the
intimidating naked alpha wolf, though his expression didn’t
change.
“I like you. You’re definitely my kind of
girl,” he said.