Beyond This Moment (41 page)

Judith flashed a smile that only heightened her beauty. "Thank you, Mrs. Whitcomb. It's an honor to meet you too, ma'am. And, actually, I've been to Timber Ridge before. Many times:" She gave James a shy glance. "I always enjoy my visits here:'

Molly looked at James, who was looking at Miss Stafford.

The song ended and the couples on the makeshift dance floor clapped. Another tune began, slower this time, with the soulful blend of a harmonica joining in. "Beautiful Dreamer;" if Molly wasn't mistaken. How apropos.

"Sheriff McPherson.. " Mrs. Spivey's voice took on a matchmaking quality. "Why don't you and Judith run along and enjoy yourselves? Mrs. Whitcomb and Mrs. Tucker and I will do what older women do and get ourselves some dinner:"

James gave a shy smile. "I'm not very light on my feet, ma'am. I'm not sure Miss Stafford wants to chance-"

"I'd love to, Sheriff;" Judith said softly.

Molly met James's gaze and reminded herself to smile. And to breathe.

"Well;' he said. "All right, then:" He offered his arm to Judith, and she slipped her hand through. He led her to the dance floor, and Molly couldn't help but watch them. They made the perfect couple, and James didn't look her way again.

Mrs. Spivey looped her arm through Molly's. "Are you ready for dinner, Mrs. Whitcomb?"

Molly felt the knife in her back sink a notch deeper. She wasn't the least hungry, but wasn't about to admit that. "Yes, dinner sounds good:"

Oleta Tucker rose from the table. `And let's not forget Frances's and Jean's desserts. Mrs. Whitcomb, if you haven't tried Frances's cherry pie and Jean's gingerbread cake, you're in for a real treat:'

Molly followed them, doing her best to pay attention as they waited in line to get their food, agreeing to whatever they said, and telling herself how foolish she'd been. About so many, many things.

As though standing outside herself, she glimpsed what others saw when they looked at her. Only, her image wouldn't hold its shape. It wavered and shifted and faded, until she saw herself without the window treatment of lies and deceit, without the forgiveness she'd begged God to grant her.

She saw herself for who she was, and went stone-cold inside.

She looked around at the townspeople-many of them her friends now, who had accepted her among them, who had invited her into their homes and made her feel a part of the community. These people were good and kind and decent. And she had lied to them, intentionally misled them, and deceived them. And herself.

She turned and looked behind her at James, dancing with Judith, and a part of her broke away inside, down deep. She had brought this upon herself. She was here, now, because of her own choices. Emotions lodged like a painful fist at the base of her throat. Oh, God, what have Idone....

And was there anything He could do to lead her through this mess she'd made?

His answer came swift-and soft as a whisper, ageless and timeless, resounding as thunder. Molly gripped the edge of the table beside her, heart pounding, certain that at any moment the ground beneath her feet would give way. Her throat all but closed as her heart recognized His voice. And responded. And went to its knees.

Just as she would have done, if she could have.

31

rs. Whitcomb, are you all right?"

Molly blinked, hearing Oleta Tucker's voice.

"You look pale, dear. Do you need to sit down?"

She nodded, still trembling inside. "Yes ... please."

Once seated, Molly drew herself up. She dabbed at unshed tears and turned so Mrs. Spivey couldn't see her face. "I-I'm fine. I think I just went too long without eating, Mrs. Tucker, that's all."

"You're certain, dear?"

Molly nodded again.

"Well-" Oleta patted her shoulder. "You rest right here. LuEllen and I will get your plate for you:"

The women returned with food, and at their encouragement, Molly took a few bites. But it wasn't appetizing and sat uneasy on her stomach.

LuEllen Spivey leaned closer. "You're sure you're all right, dear? You're looking unwell again:"

How could the woman manage so kind a tone when her manner clearly said she felt the opposite? Molly composed herself. "Please, you ladies go on and see to your families. I'm just going to sit here and enjoy the food and music for a while:"

Looking only partially convinced, Oleta Tucker finally nodded. Mrs. Spivey just smiled.

Once they left, Molly tried eating again, vegetables this time, and managed a few bites, knowing the baby needed the nourishment, even if she wasn't hungry.

"Miss Molly?"

She looked up to see Charlie walking toward her, and had to look twice at the woman with him. It was Miss Matthews! The woman she'd met at Hank Bolden's store.

"Miss Molly-" Charlie gestured beside him. "This is Lori Beth. Miss Lori Beth Matthews;' he added quickly. "I just asked her to dance with me." His eyes widened for a humorous instant. "But first, I wanted you two to meet. Lori Beth, this here's Dr. Molly Whitcomb."

Miss Matthews extended her hand. "Charlie, Dr. Whitcomb and I have already had the pleasure of meeting:"

Molly grasped hold. "Miss Matthews, it's so nice to see you again. And please call me Molly." She couldn't help but look between Charlie and the woman, and she could tell by Miss Matthews's smile that she was aware of her surprise.

"Nice to see you again too, Molly. And it would please me if you'd call me Lori Beth:" Her smile wavered. "So few people do these days:"

Molly glimpsed the frailty she'd perceived in the woman the first time they'd met. "You need to know that Charlie speaks very highly of you, Lori Beth"

"As he does to me about you. Thank you"-she squeezed Molly's hand-"for welcoming me so warmly tonight. Town gatherings aren't easy for me to attend."

Molly caught her own frown a fraction before it formed, having the feeling she was missing something. Yet she didn't know what. Discovering that Miss Matthews was the object of Charlie's affection helped allay her earlier concern on his behalf. But she still had trouble pairing them, and a flicker of shame burned her when she realized why.

Because Lori Beth was much more polished than Charlie. More refined and well spoken.

The silence drew out-too long, Molly realized. Lori Beth's expression revealed awareness, and Molly knew she'd failed to mask her thoughts.

Feeling at odds within herself, she borrowed a page from Mrs. Spivey's book, and felt years older in the taking. "Please, don't let me keep you two from enjoying yourselves. There's music playing!"

Charlie eyed the couples dancing. "I guess we could go dance now, Lori Beth. If you want:'

"I'd very much like that, Charlie. Thank you:" She turned to Molly. "I hope we can visit again, before the evening's through:'

"Of course, I'll be sitting right here"

Molly took her seat again. Charlie glanced back when Lori Beth wasn't looking and gave her a big grin. Molly waved and watched as he took Lori Beth's hand and led her onto the dance floor. He bowed slightly-as she'd taught him-then took Lori Beth into his arms to dance.

If Molly wasn't mistaken, she saw Charlie's lips moving, counting in time to the music, which made her smile.

"Molly?"

Hearing her name, and the apology wrapped around it, she briefly closed her eyes. As much as she'd looked forward to this evening, and to seeing him, she now couldn't wait for it to end. She felt like such an imposter.

James claimed an empty chair beside her.

"Before you say anything, James-" She looked around to see if anyone was listening, but the blur of conversation and music provided ample cover. Still, she kept her voice low, as he had done. "You owe me no apology."

"I feel as if I do. Can we go somewhere and talk? Quick, before Mrs. Spivey or Miss Stafford sees me again?"

She softened at the desperation in his voice. "I'm fine, James, really. And there'll be time to talk later."

"Something tells me you're not fine, Molly. And that maybe you haven't been fine in a long time:"

His deep voice had a rasp to it that stirred something inside her.

Hearing the music reminded her she was supposed to be watching, and she turned to see Charlie dancing slow with Lori Beth, holding her gently, not once stepping on the woman's feet-that Molly could see. Charlie looked her way. She saw the pride and love on his face, and couldn't have been happier for him.

She felt James watching her.

"Thank you for your note:"

She turned. "Did you read it?" What a silly question. Of course he'd read it....

"Only about twenty times so far:" He patted the pocket on his suit jacket. "But I carry it with me, just in case I need to read it again:'

Molly told herself to look away from those blue eyes, but she couldn't. And without permission, another portion of her heart gave itself to him.

"What you wrote, though, it had a certain ... dichotomy to it, don't you think?"

"Dichotomy?" She smiled despite the turmoil inside her.

He nodded. "That means a division or contrast between two things that are-"

"I know what the word means:' She gave a soft laugh. "I just didn't know you did:'

He feigned a wounded look. `And this after you said such sweet things in your note:"

The tempo of the string music changed. A little faster tune, but the couples dancing still held each other close.

I wish I could ask you to dance with me, Molly." His voice had softened. "Or maybe you'd agree to give me private lessons sometime"

He knew about Charlie. "Have you been spying on me, Sheriff McPherson?"

His face reddened. "I might have come by your cabin one evening to see if you'd have dinner with me. And then just happened to pass real close by the schoolhouse and sort of... happened to see through a window. For a few minutes:'

"You just happened to pass real close by?" She made a tsking noise, able to see that he truly did feel bad about having done it. But not completely. "Are sheriffs allowed to spy on people through windows like that?"

`Actually, it's one of the advantages of being a sheriff. You can do it and it's considered part of your job:'

"Really?"

He nodded. "It's in the Law Book. Section forty-two, code nineteen. A sheriff can skulk around a schoolhouse and spy on dance lessons for the safety of the town's teacher:"

"May I see that book, please?"

"It's back in the office:" One corner of his mouth tipped upward. "If you'll take that walk with me, I'll show it to you."

If it were up to her, she would get up from this table right now and go with him. But it wasn't. That timeless, ageless whisper reverberated inside her, reminding her of what she had to do. But this wasn't the right setting. She shook her head. "No, James. I can't:' I won't.

Molly saw Charlie and Lori Beth making their way toward the refreshment tables, and felt James following her gaze. "That's the woman Charlie was taking the dance lessons for. Her name is-"

"Lori Beth Matthews;" James said quietly, his tone going flat.

She tried to read his expression and couldn't. "What's wrong?" She glanced at Lori Beth, that same sense of having missed something returning. Her concern for Charlie renewed. "Do you know her?"

"Yes;' James whispered, watching the couple. "I know Miss Matthews. I just didn't know that she and Charlie were-" He looked back at her. "That they were seeing each other:"

Protectiveness rose within her, swift and strong. "Is there something about Miss Matthews that Charlie should know? I'm not asking you to reveal a confidence, James, I just-" She sighed. "Charlie likes her very much, and I'd simply like an assurance that he won't get hurt:"

"Charlie knows. At least I'm pretty sure he does. He's lived here for years:"

Molly's curiosity and concern jumped about ten levels. It wasn't like James to talk about others, and she waited, sensing he might say more if she didn't.

A moment passed before he spoke again. "This is common knowledge to anyone who's lived here very long. And I tell you now only because I know you care about Charlie. And I do too." The fine lines around the edges of his eyes grew more pronounced, as they did when he was troubled. "Miss Matthews moved here about five years ago. From somewhere back east. She worked in the dress shop for a while, and did real well for herself, is my understanding. Then-" He looked as if whatever he was about to say pained him. "Then Miss Matthews came to be with child;' he whispered, his voice thick with disapproval.

Molly heard the words, saw the objection on his face, and felt a severing deep inside her.

"We didn't know whose baby it was, and to my knowledge, we still don't. She's never said:"

Glad she was seated, Molly swallowed. `And yet she chose to stay here;' she whispered, hardly aware she'd spoken the words.

"Yes ... she did. But I'm not sure how wise a choice that was, given how she's been treated by folks:"

Numb, Molly watched Lori Beth as she and Charlie went through the food line. The expressions of the women serving behind the tables didn't change-until Lori Beth passed. Then a handful of them turned and whispered to each other. And those who didn't also didn't speak to her.