Better Than Revenge (Sweet Secrets #1) (19 page)

Lena's whistle came to an abrupt end, as her eyes took in the two story house that stood in front of us. There wasn't a single light on in the entire house, and everything was cloaked in darkness. I led Lena across the perfectly manicured lawn, stopping in front of the porch. “I don't expect that we're going to knock on the door are we?”

Lena shook her head. “Not a chance. Which window leads to Blake's room?”

I grabbed Lena's wrist, pulling her to the side of the house where Blake's window was located at, and pointing up at it. “That's the window to Blake's room.”

“Give me a boost.”

I laced my fingers together, squatting down as Lena stepped into my hands. My muscles groaned under her weight, but somehow I managed to push her up high enough so that she was able to reach the gutter, which she grabbed onto and used to hoist herself up onto the roof. As soon as she was on the roof, she disappeared from sight, leaving me on the ground to think about what I was going to say to Blake.

I had been trying to avoid thinking about what I would say to him when I saw him; I had been trying to avoid thinking about him all together. I knew what I wanted to say. I wanted to beg him to tell me that the picture was fake; that it was just amazing photo-shopping skills on Brianna's part. I wanted to ask him how long he had been cheating on me, and how long he was planning on stringing me along. Most of all, I wanted to punch him in the chest so that he could feel just how my heart was feeling at the moment; like someone was cutting it in half.

The strongest feeling I was experiencing right now was anger. After all that we’ve been through together, how could he just throw everything away just so that he could sneak around with my friend's bratty little sister? Did our time together mean so little to him? Did he even love me like he claimed to? There were so many questions that I needed the answer to, but I wasn't sure if the answers to the questions would be what I wanted to hear or not.

“Forrester,” Lena stared down at me, looking over the edge of the roof. “I woke him up. We're going to come out the front door, so go over there.”

“Okay,” I whispered up to her. Wringing my hands together, I took a deep breath and walked toward the porch. I sat on the first step for a moment before deciding that it'd be better to stand. I gnawed on my bottom lip nervously, practically jumping out of my skin when the front door opened.

Lena slipped out before Blake did, but immediately went to sit on one of the chairs that sat on the porch, and was far enough away from the two of us so that we had some privacy. Blake looked after her with a confused expression lining his features. His dark hair was messy from just rolling out of bed, and he was only wearing a pair of sweatpants; his usual night time attire. Shaking his head slightly, he walked toward me, scooping my hands up in his as he leaned down, peered into my eyes and asked, “What's wrong? Lena told me that something was wrong, but she wouldn't tell me what.” He cracked a little smile as he asked, “Why are your lips black?”

The pearlescent moon reflected off of Blake's eyes, making it hard for me not to stare into them, but even so, I flicked my eyes away from his and snatched my hands out of his grasp. I ignored all of his questions and decided to ask my own instead. My bottom lip shook as I mumbled the words, “How could you?”

Blake brought his hand up to my chin, turning my head so that I was once again looking into his eyes; under the moonlight they looked like two clear, blue ponds. “What are you talking about? How could I what?”

“You know what you did. I saw the picture myself so don't try to deny it.”

Realization swept across his face, his hand pulled away from my chin, taking the warmth that had spread over me with it, and allowing it to drop back down. That hadn't been the reaction that I was looking for. I was hoping that he wouldn't have known what I was talking about, and that it would have turned out that Ella had been kissing Blake's long lost twin brother, but from his reaction it was obvious that he knew exactly what I was referring to.

“Who told you?” He mumbled, taking a few steps back so that his back was pressed against the wall next to the door. He slid down the wall until he was sitting on the porch with his knees up. He gripped his hands into his hair, shaking his head slowly. When I didn't respond, he asked again.

“Brianna sent the picture to Ella, and Lena had her phone.”

Blake groaned, staring up at me with sad eyes. “It's not what it looked like.”

“Did you kiss her?” I asked, already knowing the answer to the question.

“Yes, but...”

I cut him off, “Well, then it was exactly how it looked.”

“Seeing is deceiving.”

I crossed my arms over my chest, shaking my head. “Seeing is believing.”

“Not in this case. You have to believe me, Violet; I would never intentionally cheat on you.”

“So then why the hell were you kissing Ella Snotty?” My voice rose as I spoke, and from the corner of my eye I saw Lena hold her pointer finger up to her lips, telling me to be quieter.

“She kissed me. I know how it looks, but you have to believe me. Why would I lie about this?”

“You've been lying a lot lately. I saw the picture with my own eyes, Blake. How can I believe a single word you say?”

Blake stood again, walking until he was standing right in front me. He cupped my face in his hands, “Because I love you, and I know that you love me. You just have to let me explain.” Before I could pull away, he placed a kiss on the right corner of my lips. “I would never purposely hurt you,” he mumbled against my skin.

A tear leaked from one of my eyes, and I hastily wiped it away before he could see it. “Then explain.”

“I can't right now. Tomorrow, after school, let me take you somewhere so we can talk.”

I shook my head, stepping out of his grasp. “I'm breaking up with you, Blake. I'll talk to you tomorrow, but I doubt that anything you have to say will make me want to change my mind.”

“I know, but just give me a chance. There's something that I have to do first.”

“I just want to know one thing; was it worth it?”

Blake groaned, stepping toward me again, but shaking his head when all I did was step farther away from him. “I'll explain everything tomorrow. I'm so sorry, Vi.”

“I know how guys are; you're only sorry that you got caught. Now you have to find another girl you can cheat on.”

“I only want you, and I'll prove it to you. Just wait until tomorrow so that I can explain fully.”

“I hope that you don't think that this is like some cheesy romance novel where the guy cheats on the girl, and the girl takes him back anyway. I'm not like that, Blake. I won't forgive you that easily.”

A tear slid down his cheek, leaving a snail like trail before it was quickly wiped from his face. Blake turned his head away from me. “I'll see you tomorrow,” was all he said before he went back inside of his house, closing the door behind him.

Chapter 23

Blake traced the tip of his tongue across my bottom lip teasingly, causing it to quiver in anticipation. The warmth that spread from his hand that was resting on the bare skin of my lower back was addicting. I needed more. I wanted to feel his body pressed against mine. I wanted our tongues to dance, and tangle together in sweet agony. Most of all, I wanted our racing hearts to beat so quickly that it would feel as if time had stopped.

Blake pulled away from me, pressing his lips to the corner of my mouth for a mere second before lifting his head and staring down at me. He propped himself up on both of his elbows, keeping his weight from crushing me. I couldn't help but stare into his eyes as they sparkled in the morning light that passed through my thin curtains.

“Say it, Vi,” he mumbled so quietly that it was barely audible above the sounds of our ragged breathing.

A whimper escaped from between my parted lips as I stared up at him. My hands gripped onto the cottony fabric of his t-shirt as I tried to pull him close to me again. “You say it first,” I whispered as my legs came up to wrap around his waist.

“I always say it first.”

“That's not true. I've said it first before.” Realizing that my attempts at pulling him down were having little to no effect on him, instead I slipped my hands under his shirt and began tracing invisible shapes across his chest with my fingertips.

His body shuddered lightly and he groaned softly, closing his eyes as he did so. “Violet.”

“Blake.”

He opened his eyes again, and shifting all of his weight onto one arm, he brought his free hand up to push some of the hair that had fallen over my forehead out of my eyes. In seconds, his lips were pressed against mine again. The kiss was sweet and gentle; his velvety lips moving softly against mine.

“I love you.” The words were whispered against his lips, but he still heard them; felt them.

That's when everything was shattered. Blake pulled broke the kiss in mere seconds, frowning down at me with a look of hatred lining his handsome face. Sitting up on his knees, he pulled his hands away from my body, then used them to yank my hands out from under his shirt, and to untangle my legs from around his waist.

“You shouldn't love me,” he growled as he pushed himself off of the bed. In one swift motion, he grabbed his pants off of the floor and pulled them on over his boxers. “You should hate me after everything that I did to hurt you. I don't deserve to be loved by you, Violet.”

My eyes began to water as I pushed myself up. I could feel my heart beating roughly against my ribs, causing my body to shake. “What did you do to hurt me?”

“I cheated on you, and I lied to you. Don't love me, Violet, because I sure as hell don't love you.”

A tear leaked from my eye as I stared at his retreating back. My body was shaking uncontrollably, and all of a sudden Lena's face was in front of mine. Her eyes were wide as she stared down at me, her hands shaking me awake.

“Violet, what's wrong?”

Ignoring her question, I stared around the room, taking in everything from the blue throw rug and the shiny wood floors, to the little plastic stars that covered my ceiling. Lena's curly red hair hung down as she kneeled over me.

“What time is it?” I questioned groggily.

“Time for you to get ready for school. I woke up early so I went downstairs and talked to your mom while she made breakfast. She sent me up here to wake you up, but when I came in you were mumbling Blake's name and crying.”

“I was not crying, I just had something in my eye.” I wiped away the few tears that clung to my cheeks.

“Uh huh, sure you weren't. The bus will be here in half an hour though so you should get ready.” Then she let out a sigh. “Today’s my last morning at the Forrester household.”

I met her eyes. “Really? You’re going home?”

She nodded her head, and forced a smile. “I can’t stay here forever. Besides, I’m ready to go back home.”

I nodded in response. I was happy that she was going to be going back to her family, but I was sad that she was leaving.

Clapping her hands loudly, she repeated her words from before. “Get up, and get ready. The bus will be here soon.”

Groaning, I placed one hand on my forehead. “I don't really think I'm up to going to school today. I'm not feeling well.”

Lena furrowed her eyebrows. “So your boyfriend cheats on you and wants to talk to you about it after school today, and you expect me to believe that the reason you don't want to go is because you're not
feeling well
?”

“Yes,” I replied, pulling the comforter up over my face. “Turn the light off on your way out.”

“I'll tell your mom why you don't want to go,” she threatened.

“You wouldn't dare.”

“Okay,” she sighed. I felt her weight leave the bed, and to my surprise, the lights went off as she left the room. I snuggled deeper into my bed, trying not to think about the dream I just had. Images of Blake's face kept flashing into my mind. The way that his eyes clouded over when I had told him I loved him was heart wrenching. I clutched the blanket tighter around me as his words flashed through my mind.

“I cheated on you, and I lied to you. Don't love me, Violet, because I sure as hell don't love you.”

Logically I knew that those weren't actually Blake's words, and that they were something conjured up by my imagination, but they seemed so real. Why would Blake love me? If he did love me then he wouldn't have kissed Ella, or lied to me; we would still be together, and everything would be perfect.

The sound of my door opening brought me out of my thoughts. The light to my bedroom flicked on, and the annoying sound of heels came clicking across the wooden floors. I knew instantly that it wasn't Lena, because my mom is the only one in the house who wears heels. Damn, Lena was actually serious about telling on me.

“Violet, it's time to get up.”

“I don't feel well,” I groaned, feigning sick.

“Lena told me why you don't want to go to school.”

That caught my attention. I pushed the covers off of me, and sat up, staring into my mom's brown eyes. “She did?”

“Yes, she did, and it's perfectly understandable why you don't want to go, but you still have to.”

I squinted my eyes, regarding her expression. I didn’t want to say anything in regards to the situation unless Lena had actually told her about what had happened. Even, if she really did know what happened I wasn’t planning on talking to her about it. I wasn’t really ready to talk about it at all. Not even with Blake. “What did she tell you?”

Mom pushed a curly strand of brown hair out her eyes as she took a seat at the foot of my bed. She crossed one long leg over the other, and smiled at me sadly. “She told me about that little accident you had in gym yesterday.” She raised one of her eyebrows knowingly. “I'm sure everyone has already forgotten about it.”

“What accident? I didn't have an accident in gym.”

Sighing, she said, “Violet, you don't have to lie to me. You're a teenage girl that's still going through puberty and trying to learn your body’s natural schedule. You don't have full control of what happens
down there
yet. It’s perfectly understandable.”

My cheeks flamed as she said puberty. That word was just embarrassing all together. “I'm done going through puberty mom. I didn't have an accident.”

“Sure you didn't, honey.” She patted my thigh gently while smiling reassuringly at me, but I could still tell that she didn't believe a word I was saying. “If you need me to buy you some more feminine products or some new underwear...”

“Okay, I'm going,” I stammered quickly, jumping out of bed in hopes that she wouldn't finish that sentence.

I could already tell that this was going to be a long day.

***

School passed by slowly, and for the first time in my life, I was thankful for that. Ever since I had stepped foot on school grounds, I had been dreading the end of the day. I didn't know what Blake was going to say, or how I was going to react, but one thing was for sure; I sure as hell wasn't forgiving him any time soon. Even if he had super glue on his lips and had somehow tripped and fallen into Ella, he still had lied to me, and that's not something that I was willing to overlook.

Making a quick stop at my locker, I yanked out all of my textbooks, and shoved them into the tiny space inside of my locker. After replacing the textbooks with two notebooks and a binder, I hitched my bag up higher onto my shoulder and pushed the blue metal door shut with my foot. Glancing down into my bag as I turned, I was immediately stopped when my body came into contact with a wall of solid flesh.

“Ouch. First you break up with me, and then you physically assault me in the school hallway?”

My eyes met Blake's, and despite his playfully tone, his eyes were hard. It was almost as if I was looking at a whole new person. Blake's eyes were usually bright, inviting, and friendly, but right now they were cold, and held a sort of sadness to them.

Seeing my impassive face, he added, “Too soon?”

I merely nodded in my response, then hitched my tote bag up higher on my shoulder and began fiddling with the strap's frayed end just so that my hands were busy. Blake pushed his hand through his dark hair, brushing the fringe out of his blue eyes as he stared down at me.

The moment couldn't get any more awkward than it already was. Here I am, standing in front of my recently-made-ex-boyfriend, playing with my broken backpack, and acting as if a cat's got my tongue.

Suddenly summoning up the strength to talk, I choke out the words, “I like your shirt.”
Smooth, Violet. Is that all you could think of? Really? You like his shirt?

Blake pulled the fabric of his shirt outwards so that he could glance down at it. When he saw the huge
The Rush
logo across the shirt, a smirk pulled at the corners of his mouth. “Of course you do; you bought it for me.”

“I had to buy it. It was your first concert, and you needed a souvenir. Besides, I swear that shirt was calling out to me.”

“Just like how the posters, sweatshirt, and CD that you bought were calling out to you?”

“Exactly,” I nodded, crossing my arms over my chest defensively.

Blake smiled down at me and I couldn't help but to return the smile. Staring up at him, it was almost as if nothing had happened yesterday. Almost as if Blake and I were still dating, and that he hadn't cheated on me, and lied to me, and strung me along for God knows how long. I wanted so badly for him to drape his arm over my shoulder, and pull me into his side so that I could snuggle into the warmth of his body heat. I wanted to tangle my fingers into his soft hair, and pretend like nothing had ever happened, but I couldn't, and I didn’t.

This isn't some bad romance novel where the leading guy cheats on his girlfriend and she takes him back instantly with no repercussions. This is my life, and I sure as hell don't plan on being that weak and spineless girl who lets her boyfriend walk all over her. If Blake wants me back, then he's going to have to prove to me that what I saw in the picture wasn't how it looked. After all, like he said yesterday, seeing can be deceiving.

“So, let's get this show on the road. Are you going to stare at me all day, or do you plan on telling me why you were kissing that skinny, redheaded skank?”

That got his attention.