Better Than Friends (25 page)

“What kind of times are we talking about here, honey? First blowjob?”

“Maybe. Do you remember what song was playing when… never mind.” I was suddenly embarrassed, though I couldn’t say why. We’d given each other blowjobs numerous times, so why would hearing about his first bug me or make me uncomfortable? I looked out the window and instead of taking in the scenery beyond, I focused on the pattern the rain was creating on the pane of glass.

“‘Hungry Like the Wolf.’”

“Huh?”

“That’s the song that was playing when Tony Shields blew me. First BJ. I was sixteen. How about you?”

“Uh. I was… I don’t think there was music on. Ky was my first. I…. You know, I kind of figured you might have had a girlfriend or two before you realized you were gay.”

“Nope. I always knew who I was. How about you?”

“So you never have been with a girl… at all?”

Jack threw a questioning gaze in my direction. “No. Never. What would the point have been? I was never interested, so why pretend?”

“Right. I don’t know. This is going to sound super naive, but you’re very… masculine, and girls seem to go for guys like you. I know plenty of guys, like Matt for example, who ended up dating women because they were supposed to like… female parts.”

Jack laughed. “Curtis, honey, I have never needed anyone to tell me who I should find attractive. Even if they assumed I wanted pussy instead of dick, I knew early on that was their deal, not mine.”

“You’re crude.”

“You’re a prude.”

“I know. Whatever. You’re right, though. It was the same for me, though I’m obviously not as… anyway, I always knew I liked men.”

“Go back a second. You’re obviously not… what?” I read Jack’s irritation in his deceptively casual tone.

“C’mon, Jack. You’re a… I’m not like you. I’m just a regular guy. That’s all. Girls, especially in high school, always were into the jocks. Guys like you or Matt or Peter. I didn’t care because I wasn’t interested in them, but I….”

“I don’t get it, Curtis. What is with the low self-esteem? You’re a well-educated man with a great job, a cool set of friends, and a bright future. Why do you say shit like ‘guys like you’ as though you’ve put me in a different category than you? I asked you once before, and I let it slide when you didn’t answer, but tell me now, who exactly do you think I am?”

I swallowed hard and stared out the damn window again, this time noticing the lush greens of the Maryland countryside while REO Speedwagon sang in the background about taking it on the run.

“I’m waiting, and I got nothing but time.”

“Okay. For the record, I may be a little naive at times and I know I suffer flashes of strange conservatism but I know who I am. I know I’m smart and trust me, I really appreciate my friendships in light of having an absentee family. But I also know who I’m not. I’m not like you. You’re strong, sexy, handsome, imposing. In my experience, I… I don’t know, I see you with someone like Peter, not someone like me.”

Silence. I obviously had pissed him off but I didn’t know what I’d said that made him angry. I’d stated the truth.

“I don’t think you meant to insult me, so I’ll try to move past getting fully pissed at you, but….”

“How?”

“Are you kidding me? While I appreciate you thinking I’m handsome and sexy, I’d like to think I’ve got a little more going on than my looks. Is that all you see? I don’t—”

“No! No, not at all. I didn’t mean that you’re only good-looking. You’re a million things more. You’re witty and intelligent. You’re savvy and competitive. You’re a great friend, brother, and a doting uncle. I guess…. you seem out of my league.” I bit my cheek, mortified by my confession. “And now that I’m totally fucking embarrassed, please turn the truck around, so I can get over my bout of insanity in the privacy of my messy apartment.”

Silence again. There was a noticeable release of tension, however. But I couldn’t tell why or what Jack was thinking. My skin felt too tight. I was counting on Jack to say something to restore the balance. God knew I wasn’t capable.

“So… you think I’m good-looking?” He combed his fingers through his hair and caught his reflection in the rearview mirror in a supreme show of vanity. I laughed. It was as simple as that. Balance restored.

“Thank you.”

Jack didn’t say anything. He reached across his armrest and grabbed my left hand with his right, squeezing it and weaving his fingers with mine. I knew this conversation probably wasn’t over, but I appreciated that Jack saw my limit and didn’t push me any further.

F
LAT
LAND
gave way to rolling green hills before eventually yielding to a dense forest area. Within one hour of leaving the city, we were smack in the middle of the wilderness. Jack followed a long, winding dirt road and eventually came to a stop in front of a tiny log cabin in the clearing. The location was very secluded. I had noticed a couple of vacation homes hidden among the tall evergreens, but the nearest neighbor had to be a half-mile away.

“This is it. Home sweet home ’til tomorrow afternoon. C’mon, sunshine.”

I grabbed my backpack, taking in the beauty of the quiet forest surroundings as I followed Jack up the path toward the front door. He fished a key out of his pocket and opened the door with a flourish, indicating I should enter first.

I felt like I’d walked into a storybook page. This was a true log cabin with wood-beam rafters, wood-plank flooring, and log-shaped wooden walls. A rough-rock fireplace commanded one entire wall with a large leather sofa facing it. Four short steps away was a narrow counter space, which divided the diminutive kitchen from the living area. A steep set of wooden stairs led to a loft area above, which I assumed was where we’d sleep. Other than the bathroom, everything could be seen in one sweeping glance from the front door. I wondered if it belonged to Jack, or maybe a friend of his, or maybe he rented it, or….

The door slammed shut behind me, and I was gathered immediately into a strong, bearlike embrace. Jack’s impromptu hug led to a passionate kiss, and suddenly hands and tongues were everywhere as we shed our clothing hastily in our quest to find skin. Our jackets and shirts were long gone. We stood with our bare chests pressed together, our mouths fused as our hands caressed and held on tightly.

“Bed is upstairs. I gotta have you.” Jack rested his forehead on mine, waiting for my response.

I couldn’t talk, so I nodded and let him lead the way up to the loft. At the top of the stairs, I took a brief sweeping glance at the space. There was a king-sized bed, a nightstand with a library-style reading light, and a tiny cupboard I would guess was used to store clothes and maybe linens. All the windows in the cabin were on the first level but the loft seemed light and airy all the same. It was a neat space but again, small.

I turned my attention back to my lover, who was working on his belt buckle and the zipper of his jeans. I stopped to enjoy the show, licking my upper lip unconsciously as Jack lowered the fabric over his ass. He wasn’t wearing boxers, which for some reason made me crazy. My hand shot forward as if of its own accord. I ran my fingertips along the fiery design of the tattoo on his right side and then moved higher, gently but firmly taking his nipple between my thumb and forefinger. I rolled the sensitive nub and reveled in Jack’s appreciative groan. He let me continue playing but he pulled me close to his body and worked on my jeans while I alternately squeezed and caressed his flesh. Once my jeans were unbuttoned, Jack pushed me back on the bed and covered my body with his larger one.

The feel of his bearded jaw against mine was a wild turn-on. I loved his scruffy chin nuzzled into my neck while his big, rough hands moved below, ridding us both of our last vestiges of clothing, socks, and shoes. I felt his fingers ride the crease between my cheeks and I arched my back to give him better access. I wanted friction. I was ready, and I didn’t want to wait. It had been a whole week since I’d had him inside me. Too long.

“Jack. Don’t play around. I want….”

“What?” he asked as he always did. As though he needed to hear me say aloud that I wanted him, I needed him.

“You. Fuck me.”

Jack didn’t answer. He rolled me over on my stomach before shifting off the bed to open the nightstand. He quickly covered his swollen flesh with a condom and poured a generous amount of lube on himself and over my ass. He made a mess of it. Lube was all over me. Cold and kinda gross. I turned my head to comment, but he’d moved back between my thighs and was using both his hands to massage the slick, cool moisture into my crack. I went face-first into the pillow, trying to keep from combusting at the force of sensations as he grazed his thumbs against my hole, stretching and massaging until I was biting the damn pillow to keep from moaning.

The bed shifted again, and this time he covered my body completely, entering me with care. He stayed still for a long moment, letting our bodies adjust. And then he moved. It was slow and sweet. A gentle buildup with tender touches led to a powerful thrusting motion that had us both crying out as we came within seconds of each other.

Jack stayed draped over me for a few moments before planting a light kiss on my ear and flopping to the other side of the bed.

“I hope there’s another set of sheets. We kinda made a mess here.”

Jack smiled, propping himself on his elbow as he gazed at me thoughtfully. “Yes, I have clean sheets. I should have thought about putting a towel down but… I couldn’t wait.”

I turned to face him directly, lying on my side with my head resting on my arm lazily. “So is this your place?”

“Yes. It’s the first piece of property I ever bought.” Jack’s lopsided grin was a little sheepish as he continued. “I was in my late twenties and thought of myself as a lone-wolf type. Solitude and the great outdoors were for me, I was sure of it. I failed to factor in the hour-long commute to work or the fact that I’m basically a social being. I have one of the locals come by periodically to clean it and check in, but I rarely come here anymore.”

“It’s peaceful. I like it.”

“Me too. It’s good to get away from the grind every once in a while.”

We stared at each other for a moment before Jack declared it was time for lunch and a different type of exercise.

H
IS
LOCAL
friend had stocked his cupboards with some basic foods for our two-day stay. We made a couple of sandwiches and grabbed some fruit to take on our hike. Jack patted my ass gently and told me we’d go easy, in case I was still a little sore. I felt my skin redden and smacked his arm hard, assuring my lover I was perfectly capable of fully participating in whatever he had in mind.

“There is a moderate trail that leads to the waterfall. I think it’s five miles total. We can hike to the falls, have lunch, and then head back. Sound all right?”

“Sounds good. Are we just taking the one backpack?”

“Yeah. We’re traveling light. Do me a favor and grab the blue one while I get my boots on. Let’s move it, honey.”

When we stepped outside, it was drizzling again. Nothing heavy, but I was glad I brought the jacket and grateful I owned a pair of good sturdy hiking boots. The fact I owned them didn’t make me much of an outdoorsman, unfortunately. I couldn’t remember when or why I’d bought them in the first place, but they were practically new. I hoped I could manage five miles without getting blisters. I was a city boy through and through. This hiking business might end up being more than either of bargained for, but I was determined not to dwell on any misgivings I might have about our adventure. Jack knew what he was doing. This would be fun.

An hour later, I wasn’t so sure. The scenery was gorgeous even on a gray September day when the weather couldn’t seem to commit. It drizzled and then stopped to make way for the sun to peek between the clouds for a moment before the skies darkened again. But the gray sky didn’t lessen the lush beauty of the enormous evergreens and surrounding overgrown brush. I was delighted at the sound of a nearby creek, which Jack informed me would eventually lead us to the grand waterfall in another hour or so. But as the first hour gave way to the second, I was beginning to lose interest. My feet hurt and I was hungry.

Jack was happily pointing out different tree specimens in the forest when he seemed to catch on to my flagging attention and the fact I was drifting behind him.

“You doing okay? Need some water?”

“Sure. I’m actually kind of hungry. Are we close?” I tried to convey casual interest rather than the whiny “are we almost there?” I was feeling.

Jack wasn’t fooled. He rolled his eyes and walked a few feet to a huge boulder. He set the backpack on the rock and fished out a water bottle for me. I drank greedily while he rummaged through the bag.

“What are you looking for?”

“Where are the sandwiches? This is weird. I swear I put them…. Fuck.”

Not good.
Don’t panic, Curt
, I coached myself. I wasn’t that hungry yet. We could turn around anytime. No worries.

“Did you forget to pack them?” I was proud of my indifferent tone.

“No. You grabbed the wrong backpack.” Jack sighed and shrugged. “It’s okay, I’ve got trail mix and—”

“
What?
How many blue backpacks are there? It’s not okay! We’ll starve. I’m exhausted already, my feet are killing me, I’m hungry, and where the fuck is this waterfall anyway? Are we almost there?” The moment I said those last four words I knew I sounded like a big fucking brat. I was embarrassed at my outburst, but on the other hand… I decided I wouldn’t retract a single word. It was all true.

Jack’s eyes widened with surprise. His nose twitched as he tried to school his features, but he lost the battle, succumbing to a chuckle, which morphed into a hearty guffaw.

I walked over to the boulder and sat down in a huff. I wasn’t really angry about the food. It probably was my fault. I was just reacting to discomfort. Once again, I got the feeling Jack understood without either of us having to say much.

“Are you finished cackling yet? If trail mix is all that’s on the menu, let’s eat. I need an energy boost.”