Best Friends (7 page)

Authors: Cat Blaine

BOOK: Best Friends

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“You’re all cold and shit.”

He touched his chest. “I’m devastated, man. You broke my fucking heart.” He looked away and shook his head again in disgust. “It doesn’t matter.”

“It does. I want to try with you.”

He squinted at me. “What does that mean?”

“I want to be with you…you know.”

“Secretly?”

I huffed. “Of course not. I think we both know you’re not a fan of the secret relationship thing. Okay?” I ran a shaky hand through my hair. “But in all fairness I never expected to have these feelings for you. I didn’t see it coming at all, and I think I had every right to be freaked out.” I stopped talking and watched him apprehensively.

He watched me with hooded eyes in silence. Then he nodded. “I agree. I didn’t allow you any time to come to terms with these feelings we had toward each other. I’m…I’m sorry about that.”

My chest tightened with emotion. “Really?”

Nodding, he said, “Yes.”

“Okay. Well, that’s promising.” I took a deep breath and touched his elbow tentatively. “I can’t lose you. I just can’t, Malcolm. I can’t even conceive of a future without you in it.”

He didn’t respond like I’d hoped. He shook his head and pressed his lips together. It seemed like forever before he finally spoke. “I don’t want to just be your friend. I need more. I didn’t even know it until the convention but I’m
in
love with you. I’ve never felt this way about anybody, and it’s fucking horrible because you just want to be my
buddy
.” He looked away, blinking rapidly.

Jesus. If he started crying I was going to lose it too. I was terrified of what people would say about us being together. But that fear was nothing compared to the dread of losing Malcolm forever. “I love you too,” I whispered.

He flicked his nervous gaze toward me. “What?”

I licked my lips and tried to speak more forcefully. “I love you. I want to try. I don’t know how to go about that, and I am embarrassed about what people will think of me. But I can’t lose you. I have to have you in my life.”

He rubbed his face tiredly. “C. Don’t say this shit to me just because you’re lonely.”

Frowning, I said, “That’s not why I’m saying this. I don’t get lonely. I like being alone.”

“Yeah, I know you do.” He gave an affectionate smile.

“I’m not like you, Malcolm. I don’t have your confidence. I’ve had to work really hard to be taken seriously by the guys because I’m not the big macho type. So it scares the shit out of me what they’ll say about me now. I don’t want to start over again just because of whom I love, you know?”

“The guys respect you. They won’t give you any more shit than they’ll give me. The difference is I don’t care. I know what I want and that’s you. The guys can go fuck themselves for all I care.”

I laughed gruffly. “See that comes so easily to you.”

“I’m not living my life for them, C.”

“And I love that about you too. You’re so fearless.” I grimaced. “I want that. I hate being afraid all the time.”

“You don’t have to be afraid of what we have. You should be amazed by it instead. Because do you know how rare it is to love someone you are best friends with too?”

“Well, afraid or not, I want to be with you.” It took a lot to say that but I meant every word.

“I’ve always loved you, C.” He rubbed his chest as if it hurt. “You’re like a part of me. I want to have all of you. I don’t want anyone else to have parts of you I can’t have.”

“I want that too.” My voice shook.

His brown eyes softened. “If you and I are happy together, then fuck the naysayers. Fuck them, C. Because you’re who I care about. You’re who I want with me for the rest of my life.”

“Yeah?”

“Absolutely, C.”

I moved then and grabbed him, pressing my lips to his warm mouth. He whimpered and opened up, letting my tongue explore his. God, I’d missed this. Shit, I hadn’t even realized how much I needed it until the warmth of him sank into my soul. I had Malcolm back in my arms and I was never letting go. Fuck other people. Malcolm was mine and I wanted all of him.

Lifting my head, I was breathless. “God, damn you’re good at verbalizing your feelings.”

He grinned and pulled me tighter, his cock hard against mine. “Is this real? Am I actually holding you?”

I nodded and pushed my face into his chest, clutching his shirt. “Please don’t ever turn your back on me again.”

“I don’t just want a tiny piece of you,” he growled. “You understand what I’m saying?”

My stomach tumbled at the raw emotion in his gaze. “Yeah. I’m so thankful you forgave me. I don’t give a shit about anything else right now.”

He chuckled and pulled me behind the tree so we were out of sight. He kissed me soundly and pushed his hard crotch against mine. “I wish I had you alone right now.”

“You’re coming home with me after this.”

“I won’t argue with that.” He pressed his lips to mine again. When the kiss ended, he said, “You were pretty brave approaching me today. I thought for sure you were gonna pussy out.”

I grinned. “Cheyanne wouldn’t let me.”

“I’m glad, C. I’ve been in hell these last few weeks. It was like my left nut was missing.”

I laughed. “You have a real way with words.”

“I’m quite the romantic. You’ll see.” He lifted my chin and kissed me softly. He lifted his head. “Do you realize you said you love me?”

Hugging him tight, I said, “I had to say something to get your attention.”

“Yeah?” he asked quietly.

My eyes felt damp and I spoke softly. “You’re a clingy bastard, Malcolm. I don’t know why I keep you around.”

He sighed and held me close to his heart. “I love you too, C. I love you too.”

Epilogue

My doorbell rang and I hurried to let Malcolm in. My stomach tumbled at the sight of him. His brown eyes glittered when he saw me. He held out a six-pack as he spoke. “I’m spending the night and I don’t want to hear another word about it.”

I kissed him as soon as he finished speaking, his warm lips settling my anxious pulse. Lifting my head, I tried to catch my breath. “Are you under the impression I wouldn’t want you to spend the night?”

“I’m never sure with you.” He sighed. “You were acting kind of weird around Sal today at lunch, and I wasn’t sure if it was because I kissed you in front of him.”

Turning away from him, I headed to the fridge to chill the beer. “You couldn’t see him, but I could. He frowned.”

Malcolm grabbed a chip from a bowl I had on the counter. “His face just looks like that most of the time. You need to ignore him. You take everything too seriously.”

We’d been openly dating an entire month now. I won’t lie and say it was smooth sailing. Several of the guys had flat out told me I was going to hell because of my relationship with Malcolm. But the weird thing was the second I saw Malcolm walking toward me five minutes later, their stinging ugly words had evaporated in the warmth of his smile.

“I did ignore him. Did you see me punching anybody?” I asked, refilling the chips.

He grinned. “No.”

“I think I’ve been very calm, considering I feel like I have a scarlet G on the front of my shirt at all times.”

“This is how I see it, C. I saw Sal and his girlfriend eating shellfish the other day at Santino’s. Now correct me if I’m wrong, but the bible says they should be stoned to death. I didn’t see them sweating it. They scarfed their meals down as if they would never eat again.”

Chuckling, I studied him. “I love you.”

His eyes bugged. “What the fuck? You just let that pop out like it was nothing.”

I grabbed two beers from the fridge. “I’ve been practicing in front of the mirror. It’s going pretty well.”

He looped his strong arm around my waist and pulled me close. “It’s going extremely well.”

“Are we watching a game tonight?”

Malcolm’s eyes warmed and his gaze fell to my mouth. “If you want.” He sounded distracted.

“We could watch the Real Housewives of Orange County if you’d rather.”

“Sure if that’s what you want,” he murmured.

“You didn’t hear a word I said, did you?” I sighed.

“I’ll be honest with you, C. I didn’t hear much after you said you loved me.”

He kissed me, slipping his tongue between my lips and drawing a whimper from me. When he lifted his head, he said, “This weekend is our one month anniversary of dating openly.”

“And they said it would never last.”

He waggled his eyebrows. “I was thinking maybe we could visit our favorite elevator.”

I snorted. “You really are a romantic.”

“I am.”

“We should take a kissing selfie and send it to Sal.”

“Okay. But we won’t be able to send him any of the selfies from the hotel room. Just the elevator.”

“You have evil gay plans for me, don’t you?” I grinned, my chest tight at the affectionate look in his eyes.

“Let’s just say don’t plan on leaving the room much.”

I laughed, and we made our way to the couch, balancing the beers and chips.

It might have all started in an elevator. But it ended with me

The End

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