Before You: Standalone Contemporary Romance (9 page)

“Oh god, stop,” he gasped, his fingers going into my hair, pulling my head back. I released him, looked up at him, then he dropped to his knees and kissed the life out me, lowering me onto the floor, his body over mine as his hand slid down my side and slipped beneath the cotton of my panties and cupped between my legs, moving back and forth lightly, teasing me without touching me where it counted.

My breathing was ragged, my mouth felt bruised. I kissed him hard as my fingers pulled at his hair and dug into his arm. I tilted my hips, and he slipped a finger into the damp between my thighs, sliding back and forth, finding my clit and swirling, rubbing, teasing.

“Hmmmm.” I moaned and rocked with his hand, kissing him, pulling at his lip with my teeth. He brought me to the brink then backed off. I felt drunk on arousal as he did it to me over and over again.

When I couldn’t take it anymore, I placed a hand on his shoulder and pushed, urging him over onto his back. He obliged, smiling with the knowledge that he was driving me wild, making me desperate to come.

“Condom.” It wasn’t a question, but a command. I wanted him to tell me exactly where it was so I could sheath him and ride him. I needed this. He’d been driving me crazy with arousal since I saw his picture. And his kisses. God, I’d never had this kind of explosive attraction before, and it was seriously like a drug. Even though I was completely sober, my mind was filled with absolute ecstasy at his touch.

With a half grin, he reached down beside us on the floor and grabbed his jeans, pulling one out of the pocket, holding it up to me. Closing my hand around it, I smiled down at him. “You were totally prepared for this weren’t you?”

His response was just a smile as he reached up and pulled me down to kiss him before releasing me so I could put the condom on his shaft.

“No going back now,” I gasped, taking him in my hand and positioning myself over him.

“I don’t want to.” His hands gripped my hips and together, we joined. I let out a long low moan as he penetrated me deeply, and I almost came then and there. But I held back, and with his hands digging into my hips, I pushed through my thighs and rode him, up and down, grinding at his base, my mouth open, gasps escaping my lips as I tried to keep control, our eyes locked as we watched each other try to make it last. I don’t think either of us wanted the moment to end.

But when it did. Oh god. The lights behind my eyes exploded, and I moaned embarrassingly loud. At the same time, he pushed up into me, his fingers digging into my hips as his cock pulsed in my depths.

We kept our eyes locked the entire time. It was intense. Too intense. It felt unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. Suddenly, all I could think about was the day he would go on assignment, risking his life for the sake of a documentary, willingly putting himself in the wrong place at the wrong time. My parents had been in the wrong place at the wrong time, and that had just been terrible luck. They hadn’t gone to that shopping mall knowing there’d be a gunman...All I could think about was being left alone. They were all going to leave me alone...

“Willa?”

I snapped out of my thoughts and met his eyes.

“Are you OK? Where did you just go?”

I shook my head. “I need a shower,” I said, reaching over to the bed and pulling the sheet so I could wrap it around my body and cover my nakedness as I stood. André grabbed my ankle.

“What just happened?” he asked, his beautiful eyes concerned as he looked up at me.

“We had sex. Now I want a shower.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about. I’m asking if you’re OK.”

“Another rule – we don’t share feelings.”

His expression hardened as his grip on my ankle loosened and I pulled myself free. Then I left him there, naked on the floor as I headed for the door, needing some space, needing to be alone so I could freak out privately.

The moment I turned the shower on, I put my face in my hands and tried to keep control of what was brewing inside of me.

What the fuck was that? I’d never...I’d never had that...that connection before. That wasn’t what I was expecting. I was expecting to have sex and feel the satisfaction that came with getting what you wanted. I wasn’t expecting to...to
feel more.
Holy shit.

I tried to breath.

I tried not to cry.

I tried not to regret what just happened between us.

I failed miserably.

All of a sudden, André scared the crap out of me.

––––––––

B
y the time I woke, the moving van had already arrived and men were filing in and out of the apartment, collected boxes and disassembling furniture to take in their truck. André was up and dressed in an old white t-shirt that had some sort of nineties cartoon robot on it, teamed with a pair of worn jeans. He was directing the movers, his accent making his orders sound clipped and annoyed as he told them to be careful of the old dresser that came out of his room.

As if sensing my presence, he looked over his shoulder when I entered the living space. His eyes met mine for a moment then drifted down, taking in the short summer dress I was wearing for the plane ride home and the return to a warmer Californian climate. When his gaze slid back up and returned to mine, there was something in it – concern, annoyance, arousal – I wasn't sure, he didn’t look at me long enough for me to ascertain. He just went back to directing the foot traffic that was constantly going on around us.

“Is this mine?” I asked when I saw a takeout coffee and a brown bag on the kitchen counter. He turned to me again and nodded, so I thanked him before I stood over the sink to eat. I would have offered some sort of help, but I got a sense that I'd only be in the way if I tried.

Inside the bag was a blueberry muffin that I ate quite ravenously. I hadn't realized how hungry I was until that first bite, and I was grateful that he’d thought to get me something. After the way I left him on the floor last night, I wouldn’t have blamed him if he’d chosen to let me go hungry.

After washing it down with the still warm coffee, I stayed in the kitchen and waited until the movers had finished, and the apartment was completely empty besides our bags and us.

“This place looks huge with all the furniture gone,” I mused, looking around the large space.

“It does,” he stated with little feeling as he continued to stand near the open front door. “We should probably head to the airport. I’ve already called a cab.”

“OK,” I said in an almost whisper as I collected my things and tried to avoid eye contact with him.

We rode the elevator down in silence, and I waited in the lobby while he handed the keys back to the Super. Then we went outside and again stood in silence as we waited for the cab. I felt as though I should say something. Perhaps apologize for running out, or suggest that perhaps it was a terrible idea in the first place. I could have told him that it was probably the most intense sexual experience I’d ever had and that I’d lain awake all night thinking about him in the other room, wanting to go back to him and do it all over again. Even standing beside him had my body buzzing with want. I wanted him to touch me. I wanted him to kiss me. I wanted him to hold my hand...

But, I didn’t say any of that. Instead, as our taxi pulled up to the curb, I turned to him and took a deep breath, keeping my voice flat as I spoke. “Thanks for last night. I’ve got you out of my system now. So...”

I let my words trail off as the driver got out and opened the trunk. In response, André quirked an eyebrow and wore a slightly bemused expression on his face before taking my bag from my grasp, watching as I fought the physical reaction I had when his breath touched the side of my face and his hand brushed against mine.

I shuddered.

His mouth curved in a half smile.

We sat across from each other in the back of the cab then he instructed the driver where to go. I looked out the window, trying to keep my mind of the fact that André’s thigh was pressed against mine as his large frame took up most of the backseat.

I could feel his eyes on me. I could feel the warmth flowing between our bodies where we touched.

Breathe.

His hand rested on my thigh.

Breathe.

It moved upward, beneath the hem of my dress.

Breathe.

Sliding inward, between my thighs, lightly brushing my panties between my legs.

I sucked in my breath and held it.

“New rule,” he whispered, close to my ear as his fingertips continued to brush between my thighs. “This doesn’t end unless we both agree.” He pressed his fingers a little harder, rubbing at my clit through the now damp cotton. “And I’m nowhere near done with you.”

I let out a gasp as he withdrew his hand and his presence from my personal space then somehow managed to condense his large form against the opposite side of the cab.

My eyes immediately went to the rearview mirror, hoping the cab driver hadn’t heard or seen anything. The driver met my eyes for a moment, a knowing look in his eyes, and my cheeks flamed.

My embarrassment quickly turned to annoyance as I looked over at André squished up against the other door with his arms folded across his broad chest. Then I reached out and hit him in the arm.

Quickly, he turned to face me, his mouth set in a hard line as he narrowed his eyes, waiting to see if I tried to land another blow.

I didn’t.

“Asshole,” I hissed at him, my face set in a scowl.

Slowly, his mouth curved upward and he began to laugh. It started small then turned into a deep belly laugh that took up all the space in the cab and somehow had the power to make me smile when I so wanted to be angry and give myself a reason to push him away.

“What’s so funny?” I demanded, trying hard to fight the upward turn of my lips and failing miserably.

I loved it when André laughed. I think I liked it even better than when André was nice to me.

He turned to me and rested his head against the back of the seat as he met my eyes. “You are,” he said, his laughter calming to a chuckle before his expression turned serious, and he took a hold of my hand and held it between us on the seat.

I looked from our joined hands to him, that frightened feeling from the night before returning as his expression changed from mirth to intense. I tried to pull away, but he held tight.

“You’re incredibly beautiful when you’re annoyed with me.” His voice was soft as his grip lessened and his thumb rubbed small circles on the back of my hand. He kept his eyes on mine, that twinkle of mischief there that told me he knew full well that he was currently breaking two of the rules we set out last night – no calling me beautiful, and no public displays.

With a sigh, I sat back in the cab, and he continued to hold my hand the entire way to the airport. I was getting the impression that André didn’t care what my rules were. He was going to make his own as we went along. I was simply along for the ride.

What was that I said about being a doormat again? Oh yeah, I was totally becoming one. He was walking all over me, and I was totally letting him.

––––––––

I
t took so long to get through security at O’Hare that by the time we got on the plane it was packed and we were unable to sit together. Not that it really mattered, we weren’t dating – we were barely even friends. So sitting separately for a couple of hours really didn’t matter.

Unfortunately, the only seat I could get was situated in front of a family whose little boy wouldn’t stop kicking my seat. I turned around and glared at him. I asked his mother to stop him. But, it didn’t seem to make a bit of difference, and as soon as I could get out of my seat, I did.

The moment I stood, I felt his eyes on me. A tingle crept over my body, and a smile crept over my face. But, I didn’t look at him. I liked the idea of him watching me, liked the feel of his eyes on me as I twisted my long hair up to get it off my neck. I liked the idea of him watching me as I moved up the aisle away from him. Then the refreshment carts came out, and we were separated again.

I stood outside the bathroom, took a moment once inside to relieve myself and splash some water on my face. I was beginning to get dark circles under my eyes from the lack of sleep since flying to Chicago. With André returning to LA with me, I couldn’t see that changing anytime soon, but at least mind-blowing orgasms were a good reason to miss out on sleep.

Biting my lip, I smiled as I thought about the night before – well, the part before I freaked out and left him naked on the floor. I watched my face change in the mirror, my eyes sparkled and my cheeks brightened. I released a laugh. Just thinking about André was turning me on.

Suddenly, a two and half hour flight was far too long.

Releasing a sigh, I turned in the small space to open the door, and the moment I released the latch the door pushed open and I gasped.

“What are you doing?”

André grabbed me around the waist and lifted me onto the small basin area as he stepped in and locked the door, his face close to mine as he whispered, “I’m about to fuck you.” He pulled back and tilted his head in question. “Unless of course airplane bathrooms are against the rules.”

Things were poking into me and I needed to hold on to his shoulder and put my foot on the edge off the toilet to keep from falling. My other leg was up against the door, and he stood between my thighs, his hands still on my waist. “Something tells me you don’t really give a shit about the rules.”

With a half grin, he reached between my open legs and slid his fingers beneath the side of my panties, running them down my center before pushing inside. “Rules are much like promises – so easy to break.”

I let out a moan, dropping my head back against the mirror as he pulsed inside me with two fingers, in and out, using his thumb to circle over my clit until he added a third finger, and I almost lost it.

It felt. So. Good.

I opened my mouth, a moan in my throat, ready to erupt. He clamped his mouth over mine, and the moan went into his mouth as his tongue pushed its way in my mouth possessively, demanding my response as he continued to push his way inside me, stretching me with his long fingers.